Icandothis 763 Posted December 18, 2020 Author Share Posted December 18, 2020 Hello, It has been so long since I have been here. Life has been very confusing. Integrating myself back into my “normal” daily activities has been a challenge. I am emerging into a world that has been extremely impacted by the pandemic; and where I live in PNW, everything is very locked down. Just one breath at a time. We have moved to a new home, a block away. It’s bigger... which my girls really love. But it is still next to a forested area. I again, broke down into tears leaving my old apartment... but then a beautiful rainbow appeared. Picture below. 🥰 Still going to acupuncture. My hands and feet are numb from chemo... this could take a year to resolve. Starting back into my yoga practice! Also practicing daily body scans. Also, I have removed sugar from my diet. All sugars, honey, maple syrup, agave. I really really struggled with this... but now... over a month out I am feeling really really healthy. I have replace all the sugars with spices, turmeric/black pepper/cinnamon and a ton of herbs, basil/thyme/rosemary. So delicious. I miss my very very long hair. I had to cut off 14 inches... and have realized just how attached I was. My resolution for this year is community. Feeling very isolated, and have started to fall into some not so good patterns. At the same time, I feel more than enough. Full of love, life and light. Feeling so so so many things right now. I have missed this forum and hope to be posting more regularly. Edit: I can't find my rainbow picture. Will post soon. Sending joy friends! 5 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Amphibian220 322 Posted December 18, 2020 Share Posted December 18, 2020 Heart warming to see your message. Stay on the track to recovery and do look for ways to work on important things. I am reading a physical book right now which affords more comfort in managing my time and not being distracted by ads. 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Bugg 201 Posted December 18, 2020 Share Posted December 18, 2020 I've just read through your journals and I just wanted to say you are such an inspiration. Stay strong and sending much love and peace your way ❤️ 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
gargamel 425 Posted December 18, 2020 Share Posted December 18, 2020 I'm so glad to see you posting here. I also had a hiatus from the forum. It's wonderful to hear the good news regarding your health. 🙂 13 hours ago, Icandothis said: I miss my very very long hair. I had to cut off 14 inches... and have realized just how attached I was. It will grow! I'm also growing my hair slowly, hadn't had a haircut in... 4 months? 🙂 It's still pretty short tho, haha 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Icandothis 763 Posted December 19, 2020 Author Share Posted December 19, 2020 2 hours ago, gargamel said: I'm so glad to see you posting here. I also had a hiatus from the forum. It's wonderful to hear the good news regarding your health. 🙂 It will grow! I'm also growing my hair slowly, hadn't had a haircut in... 4 months? 🙂 It's still pretty short tho, haha Ahh that’s right.. we’re going to grow our hair together! Glad to see you here. I haven’t caught up on your journal but I hope you are meeting your goals! Have a beautiful day! 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Icandothis 763 Posted December 19, 2020 Author Share Posted December 19, 2020 The opposite of addiction is not sobriety; it’s human connection. I love this quote because it is a beautiful reminder about how we are too live in community, to love each other, to need one another. I went to acupuncture today... and my practitioner is so wonderful. He always reminds me what a beautiful soul I am, how I have overcome so much, how it’s ok to be sad. And I have cried so many tears. So so many tears. He says I always look so happy and positive. I gently tell him how hard I grieve. Its really important to share not only the love, but the vast amounts of heartbreak I have been through. Another quote, “ When after heavy rain the storm clouds disperse; is it not they’ve wept themselves clear to the end.” Sending all my love today friends. 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Jason70 68 Posted December 19, 2020 Share Posted December 19, 2020 That first quote is beautiful, i love it so much. Although physically we may be seperated because of COVID, we are still connected in other ways. 2 hours ago, Icandothis said: I went to acupuncture today... and my practitioner is so wonderful. He always reminds me what a beautiful soul I am, how I have overcome so much, how it’s ok to be sad I am glad your practitioner is like this, what an amazing human he seems like! I hope you are doing well and i wish you my best Jason 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Icandothis 763 Posted December 22, 2020 Author Share Posted December 22, 2020 Here is a picture of the rainbow over my home that I mentioned. It’s reminders like this.... we are never alone. Starting a 24 hour fast today. I don’t really know anything about fasting... except to not eat. Planning on doing 1 24 hour fast a week. Instead of eating... I will be praying/meditating. Hoping to get clarity and peace regarding next steps. Have a beautiful day friends! 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Ikar 1571 Posted December 22, 2020 Share Posted December 22, 2020 4 hours ago, Icandothis said: Starting a 24 hour fast today. I don’t really know anything about fasting... except to not eat. Planning on doing 1 24 hour fast a week. Instead of eating... I will be praying/meditating. Hoping to get clarity and peace regarding next steps. I fasted once for a day back in January. I got up late from my bed and realized I hadn't eaten for over 12 hours already, so I rolled with it. The "worst" thing about it was that I found I had no way to relax and that I felt I needed to do something all the time! So I slept for the last hour or two of the fast. The food was tastier afterwards 😄 Good luck! 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
BooksandTrees 3445 Posted December 22, 2020 Share Posted December 22, 2020 Hi! Welcome back. I'm so happy to see you and I was worried you were not well again. Thanks for the kind words. I'm glad you moved and I hope this works out. Looking forward to more of your updates. I agree with human connection being a major proponent in quitting games. Having society is very important. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Icandothis 763 Posted January 2 Author Share Posted January 2 Alive Joyful Thankful Happy New Year everyone. 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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