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Many of us experience this emotional abuse and its on us to make sure it does not get repeated. That's what I've really loved about therapy and the lessons learned through it. It brings us together in community and creates warmth where once there was not.  You're doing a great job. Just remember to remain grounded when that fog rises. Like I previously mentioned, once you achieve mental clarity in the 30-90 day reprieve from escapism you'll see the world differently and your heart will beat differently. I'm very happy you've found compassion in our community. I hope I've been able to talk and as always if you ever do need to talk feel free to message me as well. I'm also glad you've been able to find friends and security with a therapist. They will be your biggest adult ally for the time being. Dogs are wonderful and emotionally healing, but therapists are trustworthy and emotionally intellectual.  My friend goes to and teaches at yoga retreats all across the country to heal others and be healed herself. I think this is a great idea for you and wish you luck as you attend.  The biggest thing you mentioned is a career. If you read my posts from January to July you'll notice I go from wanting to leave my job, to leaving my job, to being miserable and without freedom, to getting my job back, to owning my own place, and living the way I want to live surrounded by my friends and thriving in a major career. The empowerment job security provides a person is unequal. Yes, love is powerful and having a family is important. Having a job and the financial security to live life at the pace you need and want to live is unmatched in terms of bringing happiness to your life. I think this is a great idea. I also don't recommend you reading those posts earlier this year since I swear a lot and it's kind of messy. I am 100% open at least lol. I think I documented my journey as honest as possible. I'm very proud of your patience through this. It's going to take some time. I hope you are ok and safe at home.

Thanks, Neil. I'm gonna see what happens after I talk to him next. I feel like he is disrespecting me and it annoys me. I don't like when people bother me when they should know I don't want to talk. I'm direct enough for people to get the hint. I'll let people know I don't like them and end it on the spot.

Thank you so much. I appreciate the kind words. I'm going to talk to him at some point, but I made sure to ignore him yesterday and he got the hint. He won't message me today since he's with his fiance. But tomorrow I will strike and explain he's not respecting me. I want to make a point that I only want to talk on the phone maybe once a week or every two weeks. I don't like talking to people who annoy me. I just cut them out as soon as possible. Life is too short for a disgraceful situation to bog me down. I think I'll be done with my application next week and move forward from there. I'm very excited to develop my career even further. I enjoy what I do although it is difficult. I just enjoy critical thinking and being with intelligent people all day. We'll see what happens!

I'm sorry you do not feel well. I have a feeling this might take a little time and might be a test of your patience. Nausea is such a bad feeling. I had it last month for most of the month and it makes you unable to eat, sleep, or function. Causes anxiety also. I wish you luck and a speedy recovery. I'm very curious what the cause of all of this actually is. 

Today is Saturday, day 6 of my break from gaming and I'm not sure how to feel. My life has gone nowhere in the 13 years since I left high school (I didn't even finish my third year) and only now am I starting to realise that. I've never finished my education, had a social life, had a job, dated, etc. All I've done is sit in my room all day in my parent's house playing video games and browsing the internet... I haven't met any of the goals I set for the weekend yet. I downloaded a few light novels though so I can have new material to read other than manga.