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  1. Yesterday
  2. Drift to low performance Going to sleep late and refusing to dance with the system have caused a downward cycle of -an unhealthy craving to control my day through watching action films at the end of it. Sometimes tiredness beckmes extreme, my maneuver window is there for a short while so I have to keep actively searching. I must go to sleep early, have cardio in the morning and write job applications throughout the day.
  3. Honestly, idk what to say. This is really difficult to write as I'm perpetually in a depressive pain fog. I feel like I don't relate to a lot of the sharing here about playing 10+hrs bc I've never had the energy for that. I'm trying to quit gaming bc I feel that years of over-usage of the mouse/poor ergonomics? has severely fucked up my shoulder that I'm contemplating whether it's best to just quit using the PC for good. Not sure if anyone else suffers from severe physical chronic pain here, or how to break out of it. I struggle to relate to a lot of what Cam is saying because of this crippling physical pain. I played most of the games y'all have, I used to enjoy old-school RPGs (grew up on Fallout 1/2) but now I feel like I don't even have the capacity to do that, or to enjoy anything. I'm just miserable and in pain all the time. I do still play games on mobile though, though I don't even feel like I have much energy for that too. I play Horus Heresy: Legions casually, but it's a constant struggle to "play for enjoyment/not caring about winning or losing" (which I think I do mostly), vs "chasing the meta". I have been going to the gym pretty religiously for 2-3 years now, but I still game on my down-time. I want to get reading done, but I can't, I just don't feel like I have any focus after spending it all in the gym. I have been trying to walk more, not sure how much it's helping as I live in a city-state (SG) where it's difficult to get in-tune with nature. This is another factor in being introverted and sinking into gaming. I quit Humble Bundle recently, but Planet Zoo (Zoo Tycoon anyone?) released and I relapsed(?). After trying it out I just felt like I was hurting my thumb/wrist/shoulder more (bc that game is clunkily designed as hell), I just had a "I'm done" moment. I've considered migrating to mouseless/consoles bc of this pain, but I haven't even committed to that (lol). I'm tired of seeking distractions. Porn is another issue but idk how to untangle that (bc Christian repression). I don't want to rely on these things to escape pain. I want to be better, someone who reads more and meditates more, and isn't crippled by pain and eco-anxiety about everything wrong in this world. Hell, I'd settle for getting my room under control.
  4. Yeah, I absolutely agree on this one. After I’ve read Atomic Habits by James Clear I started questioning importance of motivation. I tend to believe that motivation is volatile and in order to achieve something a have to focus on my system (routines) rather than goals. Environment is also a very important factor: right after my last relapse I’ve moved to countryside for a while, away from my gaming PC. So I didn’t play since then just because 1) I can’t, so it’s not tempting 2) I don’t have PC around so it’s not triggering me into an action, I have no cues to bad habits here. Thank you for your suggestion, it was an interesting read. It turned out I’m ISTP-T. Good to know, I’ve learned quite a bit about my likely behavior.
  5. Last week
  6. everything's still going well and have taken quite a bit of podcast notes which seems to be doing me great I feel like I have gotten past the phase of personal development type content now with full interest in applied neuroscience along with investing and entrepreneurship. sure it is still time consuming content but getting the feeling these things will be showing solid results for my efforts I will just have to make sure I start putting action behind it all and not too much later phase out the heavy podcast consumption.
  7. suppose i would just give the console back to her and spare myself the family drama if that's going to be a thing. if it was a console I had bought I would just throw it away or sell it depending on market value. if I could do it again I would have taken the console apart then stuff it with at least a hundred-rounds of firecrackers and have a bit more fun with it.
  8. Hey, Max! Keep it up. I think what you’ve already written down shows the progress you’ve been making so far. This path is not a straight road to success but rather a series of victories AND failures. I suppose the best we can do is learn to accept both as equally important and in some way desired. What I can recommend is learning how your motivation works, because as I recently learnt there’s no such thing as a lazy person, but rather wrong conditions for motivation to thrive. I think there are different ways one can learn about what works for him best, personally for me what has been a great deal of help recently is MBTI system, I recommend you look it up!
  9. Макс, привет! Взаимно рад знакомству! Активизируется жизнь — видимо, время такое, что очень уж тянет сюда нас. Хотя для меня это чистая случайность — просто пришла пора именно сейчас разобраться с этой частью своей жизни. Но, «случайности не случайны», как говорят. Будем знакомы)
  10. DAY # - 1 Time I woke up: 12:00 Time I went to sleep yesterday: 04:30 Physical task: Yoga 7 min Mental task: Meditation 10 min Projects: — Miscellaneous accomplishments: ~ I’ve taken care of myself before I’ve started doing anything else during the day ~ I’ve let my interest run wild allowing it to listen to a podcast, listen to some music, look through a book on Budapest, read a chapter from a book on sayings, etc. ~ I’ve spent a good evening with my friends and my wife ~ ~ Summary of Day #: I’ve had a great day emotionally. I am a bit upset I couldn’t do work today. Sometimes I wish I just had more time. Social connections are important, but so is work. And sometimes I am much more keen to spend time with friends than to do work. What I am grateful for today: ~ I am grateful for my wife. ~ I am grateful for my friend V. and his mom G. ~ I am grateful for my theatre. ~ I am grateful to my mom for giving me life. Over and out!
  11. fantastic report! that's all great stuff to hear I think you have a very firm handle on things. Myself lately doing great thank you recently have been taking a bit of notes on neuroscience podcasts regarding sleep / light exposure / circadian rhythm then using some applied science in my life it is so good life is great.
  12. Well said I feel this way too it's like every so many days, daily if I'm really on top of my game, I do a little bit of maintenance adjusting that daily routine.
  13. Day 298. I was 100% sure I posted here last week... must have either been a dream or network failure... Like @BooksandTrees, I don't journal here as much anymore because I've found better places to share my thoughts and improve my wellness at. I will continue to post life updates here for all the folk who are going through their gaming addiction. I know that journals like this were extremely helpful when I was starting out, and I want to help others grow! Recap of the week: Still rings true, but it's hard to say how they will turn out- 2/3 will be completed virtually for sure, and one of them isn't setting up as stable as I'd like it to... I'm feeling more nervous about my summer- I fear being overwhelmed with household stuff while at home. Since my older siblings will not be staying home a lot of responsibilities will fall on me. I do know, however, that I'm in a much better place than years before, and that already means a lot. No matter how much or little I will be involved, I know my goals better than ever and will work hard for them 🙂 Well... I've managed to built my schedule up but it is not as easy to follow it with how eventful spring has been for me. So many things going on! I do think that the change is very much needed, as I'm continuing to miss some small but important deadlines here and there, and that is quite frustrating as I like to be on top of my tasks. Already building back a lot of older habits that I've managed to let go off during Winter, such as adding to my to-do list the moment something comes up instead of leaving it for later, and using my calendar and daily schedule more actively. -- Overall, I've been doing okay. My motivation has plummeted last week completely, and it was fairly frustrating to be dragging behind both with academic and personal tasks. I'm back and doing far better, but that week has made me notice how many skills and methods I've managed to loose in the last month. I've also come to acknowledge the many difficulties this year has brought to me, and have come to appreciate more where I currently am. There are so many changes I've done over the last few months, and despite the difficulties in adjusting my entire lifestyle getting in the way of my efficiency and productivity, I'm doing what I'm passionate about, finally. I'm still not very happy, but a lot of it has to do with how I look at my own life rather than actual external stressors. I tend to overwork myself, and look back at "yesterday" negatively. I lack gratitude and appreciation of my accomplishments, and look to deeply into all the uncertainties and complications of my life. Amen to this not being true when I journal here next. Gaming Been having some urges to play as it's a bit odd to be pursuing audio work in gaming so dilligently while not actually playing any... or is it? I still feel like the two don't have to correlate at all. I'm extremely passionate about sound design, and it has nothing to do with how many hours a day I play games. It's kind of like being a professional athlete and not watching sports- the two correlate but are not mutually dependent?.. Concentration Have been mostly resolved. I have done lots of changes again this week, and I'm feeling super happy about them. I have started to spend much less time working in my room, and have redone my self-evaluation process in a way that is much more conductive to growth. I've integrated my goals into my schedule, and resumed using my planners and calendars. There is a lot of work to do still on being efficient with some tasks, but even there I'm feeling much better than usual. Many of my previous routines worked extremely well, but despite their comfortability what I was doing accomplished little for myself personally. It looked great from a sideview- grades, projects, employment, and all that jazz. But, I was not living my passion. Now, even though my routines are not in equally stable position, I'm closer to living the life I want to, and that means much more. I'll learn to concentrate and be productive soon 🙂 Relationships Maybe not so much now, but I'm still feeling fine. A lot of my anxieties have been resolved, and I feel like I can be much more open around others. Saw my family last week, which was totally awesome, but not have spent much time with others. Recently had a major argument with my partner, but it turned into a very fullfilling and meaningful conversation. Do hope to hang out with more folks soon, but also feel like I don't have precise social goals and don't need many interactions to feel fullfilled, so far. Passion Living it. Every day I've been making something, with no breaks. I can be more productive and learn faster for sure, but simply getting into the habit of living my passion daily is a huge leap forwards. Not only am I doing, but also truly enjoying what I do- also a big first. haha! I have been doing those daily for the last few days. Hope to continue to balance my time well between animation and stills. Nope, this has not been happening... I don't prioritize my instrument much anymore, or at least allow myself to move when I practice around the day. I think that this is not a great choice, but on certain days like weekends my schedule is too varied and inconsistent. As long as I manage to do both on certain days, I will feel good. This is it for now; in two weeks I will do another review of my self-assesment tracking- excited for that! Hope that reading this has been helpful to you, and thank you so much for taking your time here 🙂 Po
  14. I can't believe it's summer time already.... I'm starting to not care about video games back when I used to care at the time. And...it's a good thing too. I'm starting to sleep less too and working hard also smart on my online business at the same time while also doing my to-do list. I'm going to grill chicken on Sunday (tomorrow by the time I make this journal update), it's going to be fun at that day because it's good to grill food and learning how the grill works in general. I'm starting to notice that I don't enjoy consuming too much content that has nothing to do with video games in general, I've made a video about the creator and consumer content and compare both of them on my professional channel on YouTube. There is a video that talks about the same thing in the Game Quitters YouTube channel in general. I'm still learning how to speak in different languages if I do get a private jet while having 7 streams of income in the future. I'm approaching life in a good way and mindset in general too. My mindset is good enough to have a successful life.
  15. Привет! Рад видеть русскоязычных ребят на форуме, такое тут не очень часто, а за этот месяц ты уже второй. Желаю удачи)
  16. Day 45: May 13th, 2022 Summary of the day: Stood up late today and wasn’t productive enough. No cravings for video games Made it half way through! (45 days) --------------------------- Day 46: May 14th, 2022 Was mainly outdoors today and was another busy Saturday. No cravings for video games. Will be having a test next week, I prepared some of it tonight, and will continue tomorrow. Next milestone: 60 days It's 14 days till my next milestone!
  17. День 0 был отличный. Я часто чувствую себя на подъёме, когда что-то начинаю. А. и К. сообщили, что у них будет ребёнок. Лучшая новость, которую можно получить сейчас… Здесь буду писать, наверно, пореже, чем в основном дневнике, дабы не перегореть. Может, 1-2 раза в неделю. И, наверно, скорей в формате дневника, а не отчета, как предполагал выше. Отчёт будет in English, а здесь — свои мысли, на родном языке. То, что от сердца. Поскорей бы мир.
  18. DAY # - 0 Time I woke up: 9:30 Time I went to sleep yesterday: 2:30 Physical task: — Mental task: — Projects: — Miscellaneous accomplishments: ~ I’ve started this journal ~ I’ve found a great channel on ENFPs and have learned a great deal about myself ~ I’ve gone to a friends’ gathering and had a great time there ~ I’ve walked the dog twice for at least 30 min ~ I’ve washed all the dishes before going to bed Summary of Day #: The day was great for me. It started with me being addicted and ended with me feeling connected. It is in my nature to be excited about a start of any project. I also found a great resource that will definitely help me understand myself better, and that has inspired me a lot. Also, A. and K. told us they are going have a child, and that’s just amazing. Just what is needed during these trying times. What I am grateful for today: ~ I am grateful for people who run Game Quitters. ~ I am grateful for my wife. ~ I am grateful for my dog (and for the fact that she is finally having her period again). ~ I am grateful for having access to foreign education. Over and out!
  19. 13th May: - couldn't focus today - drew 2 more heads but it took a lot of time because of my lack of focus - going to rest on weekend - also I won't be drawing on Monday because it is my fiancee birthday and we are going to spend the whole day together Goals: I will draw 50 asaro head by 20.05.2022 (18/20) I will have 800 hours on my practice counter by 01.03.2023 I will have 3000 hours on my practice counter by 01.03.2027 Goals met: 5 Practice counter: 191 hours
  20. 64 days. 3rd day of antidepressants. They're making me nauseous. Bleh.
  21. Форма на каждый день: День # - Проснулся: Лёг спать (вчера): Физическая задача: Ментальная задача: Проекты: Другие достижения: ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ День в общем #: Благодарности дня: ~ ~ ~ ~ Всем мира!
  22. Hey guys! The link to my introduction. I'll start off by using one of the provided templates (posting it below so I don't have to search up later). DAY # - Time I woke up: Time I went to sleep yesterday: Physical task: Walk the dog Mental task: Meditate Projects: Dari Miscellaneous accomplishments: ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Summary of Day #: What I am grateful for today: ~ ~ ~ ~ Over and out!
  23. Всем привет! Я рад стать частью этого сообщества - решил перепостить свой приветственный пост сюда, дабы закрепить начало начал. Пост переводной с моими правками, так что sorry, если где-то мысль составлена не по-русски. Поехали! *** Да, в этом дневнике может встречаться мат, потому что мне важно иногда как следует выругаться, особенно, если я чем-то расстроен. *** Мне 29 лет. Я работаю удаленно в качестве юрисконсульта и время от времени играю профессионально в театре. Возможно это, поскольку моё первое образование - в области международного права, а дополнительное - в области актерского мастерства (играю в проф. театре уже 9 лет). А ещё я недавно женился на женщине, которую люблю, с которой мы вместе уже почти 3 года. Это мой второй брак, и я чувствую, что он будет последним. Если кто–нибудь из вас знаком с системой Майерса-Бриггса, я - ENFP (в соционике "Гексли"). Это означает, что я склонен пробовать много вещей одновременно, но едва ли заканчиваю что-либо из начатого. Пишу об этом, потому что у меня много увлечений, и все они пострадали из-за моего игрового расстройства. Наиболее выделяющиеся из них: бег, езда на велосипеде, медитация, пешие прогулки, фортепиано. Но в моем идеальном образе жизни есть также место для тренажерного зала, боевых искусств, катания на сноуборде, пения и танцев. И это ещё я пытаюсь быть разумным. Как я уже сказал, игры оказали огромное влияние на мою жизнь. Я пристрастился примерно со 2-го класса, а это значит, что мне было 7 или 8 лет. Я думаю, что предвестником этого было мое пристрастие к просмотру телевизора, который я часто смотрел в детстве, когда оставался один (мои родители развелись, а маме приходилось много работать). Во 2-м классе мне подарили Playstation, и именно тогда все это началось (хотя в то время никто не мог знать). У меня самые теплые воспоминания об игре в PS1 с моим другом, но я бы хотел, чтобы мы вообще никогда этого не делали, так как все это время можно было бы потратить на изучение полезных навыков или игру во что-то значимое вместо этого (типа футбола или баскетбола. например). Но, мы ведь были просто детьми, которые делали все возможное, чтобы повеселиться, несмотря на ограничения и усилия родителей заставить нас полюбить выходить на улицу. В 5 или 6 классе (что означает около 13 лет) мне подарили компьютер с подключением к Интернету. Именно тогда и порно вошло в мою жизнь, но это совсем другая история. Я просто напишу здесь, что для меня порно и игры всю жизнь шли рука об руку, два самых больших дьявола в моей жизни. Итак, я играю в видеоигры уже 20 лет. Бля... Двадцать, сука, лет. Я хотел бы, чтобы у меня было хобби, которым я занимался уже 20 лет, которое, я полагаю, сделало бы мою жизнь намного лучше и приятнее. Что ж, слава богу, по крайней мере, у меня есть театр. Что мне кажется забавным, так это то, что с точки зрения игр я никогда не покидал ту эпоху, в которой я играл больше всего - поскольку у меня никогда не было современного игрового ПК или консоли, я всегда возвращался к играм прошлого, в основном к тем играм, которые я уже знал. Итак, каждый раз, когда у меня случается рецидив, я обычно играю в один и тот же список игр, в которые играл всю свою жизнь. При этом я в курсе того, что выходит на рынок с точки зрения новых игр. И это тоже часть моей зависимости - смотреть новые игры на Youtube и фантазировать, как я сам в них играю. Что хуже всего для меня в видеоиграх, так это то, что, несмотря на то, что у меня есть работа, семья и даже профессиональное хобби (актерское мастерство), мне все равно удается нездоровым образом убегать в видеоигры - в ущерб моей реальной жизни. На самом деле даже этот пост я пишу тогда, когда должен работать - оправдывая это тем, что по крайней мере - это не игра, и для меня это очень важно, так как на этот раз я действительно хочу перестать играть навсегда. Так что это пойдет на пользу моей работе в целом. С другой стороны, я горжусь тем фактом, что преодолел свою зависимость от: а) травки; б) никотина; в) алкоголя. Это означает, что я больше не курю ничего и не употребляю алкоголь. Я понимаю, что зависимость от игр, порнографии и социальных сетей - это 3 пристрастия, оставшиеся в моей жизни, с которыми нужно бороться. Итак, игры - следующие в списке. Самое время мне повзрослеть и научиться делать своего внутреннего ребенка счастливым, не ухудшая при этом свою жизнь. Я хочу стать хорошей частью этого сообщества и помогать, когда смогу. Но я думаю, что прямо сейчас самой большой помощью для всех было бы разобраться в себе, чтобы я мог стать лучшей версией себя и действительно иметь что-то, что я могу подарить миру. Пока я чувствую, что у меня этого мало, несмотря на все хорошее, чего я добился в жизни. Я думаю, это в основном связано с тем фактом, что у меня так много амбиций, но я никогда не предпринимаю шагов, чтобы их достичь. Я думаю, что это главная причина, по которой я это делаю - я хочу вырваться на свободу и стать тем человеком, которым, как я верю, я могу быть. Спасибо, что дочитали до конца, и увидимся на форумах.
  24. Hey, guys! I'm glad to become part of this community. I am 29 y.o. I work full-time remotely as a legal advisor and act on a professional level at a theatre from time-to-time. This is due to the fact that my first degree is in the field of international law and my additional degree is in the field of acting (I've also been doing stage acting professionally for 9 years now). I am also recently married to a woman I love, with whom we've been together for almost 3 years now. This is my second marriage and I can see it being the last one. If any of you are familiar with the Myers–Briggs Type Indicator, I'm an ENFP. This means that I am prone to trying lots of things at once, yet struggle to finish any of those. I'm saying that because I have many hobbies, all of which have taken a hit due to my gaming disorder. The most prominent of them are: running, cycling, meditation, hiking, piano. But in my ideal lifestyle there's also place for gym, martial arts, snowboarding, singing and dancing. And that's me trying to be reasonable. As I said, gaming has taken a huge toll on my life. I've been addicted since around 2nd grade, which means the age of 7 or 8. I think the precursor to that was my addiction to watching TV, which I did a lot as a kid as I was often left alone (my parents divorced and mother had to work a lot). In 2nd grade I was gifted with a Playstation and that's when it all began (though no one could know at the time). I have the fondest memories of playing PS1 with my friend, yet I wish we've never done it at all, since all this time could've been spent on learning a skill or playing something meaningful instead. But, hey, we were just kids, who did all they could to have fun despite the restrictions and parents' efforts to make us love going outside. In grade 5 or 6 (which mean around age of 13) I was gifted with a PC with internet connection. This is when porn also entered my life, but that's a whole other story. I'll just state for the record that for me porn and games have also gone hand in hand, the two biggest devils of my life. So, I've been playing video games for 20 years now. Wow. Twenty fucking years. I wish I had a hobby that I had been doing for 20 years by now, that would've made my life much better and enjoyable I suppose. Well, thank god there's acting at least. What seems funny for me that in terms of gaming, I've never left the era that I used to play games the most - since I've never had a modern gaming PC or console, I've always retreated to playing games of the past, mostly those games, that I've already known. So, every time I relapse, I usually play the same list of games I've played my whole life. Meanwhile, I am up to date with what comes out on the market in terms of new titles. And this is also part of my addiction - watching new games on Youtube and fantasising playing them myself. What's worst for me about playing video games is that, despite having a job and a family and even a professional hobby such as acting, I still manage to escape in an unhealthy ways to video games - and to the detriment to my real life. I am actually writing this exact post as I am supposed to be working - I figured out that at least it's not gaming and for me writing this is very important, since I really want to quit this time for good. So that's going to benefit my work in the bigger picture. On the bright side I pride myself in the fact that I have overcome my addictions to: a) weed; b) nicotine; c) alcohol. This means that I do not smoke any kind of stuff anymore, and don't drink alcohol. I realise that gaming, porn and social media addictions are the 3 addictions left in my life that need to be addressed. And so, gaming is next on the list. It's about time I grow up and learn how to make my inner child happy without making my life worse. I wish to become a good part of this community and be of help whenever I can. But I think right now the biggest help to everyone would be to sort myself out, so that I can become a better version of myself and actually have something I can provide to the world. So far, I feel like I have little of that despite all the good things I've achieved in life. I think this is mainly due to the fact that there's so much that I am ambitious about but never take the steps to get it. I think this is the main reason why I am doing this - I want to break free and become the man I believe I can be. Thanks for reading through and see you around the forums.
  25. I've done a 90DayChallenge before. I tried to do a second and failed. Enough. I'm tired of falling. I'm tired of excuses. I want success. I want to change my life for good, I want to level up my life in 90 days. In 90 days, I commit to: 1 - Finish my online course once and for all 2 - Eat healthy 3 - Exercise No more excuses, thinking about the past and other self-destructive thoughts. Good Luck! I've got this
  26. 12th May: - did 30 minutes more than usual because I will have less time tommorow - finished 3 asaro heads today! 4 more to go! - I will try to finish the assigmnent tommorow Goals: I will draw 50 asaro head by 20.05.2022 (16/20) I will have 800 hours on my practice counter by 01.03.2023 I will have 3000 hours on my practice counter by 01.03.2027 Goals met: 5 Practice counter: 188.5 hours
  27. I have been playing elite dangerous here recently and now it's making me want to quit gaming also it scares me literally I get scared when I have to jump or supercruise or land on a planet anyway what motivated you to give it all up??
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