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Icandothis

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About Icandothis

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  1. Agree with the above poster. When you have the mentality of “do or die” it puts your body in a fight or flight response. You will learn this in med school... how you need to stay calm and cool during stressful situations. Stay present and grounded. Have compassion for yourself. Have a beautiful day my friend.
  2. Hi! Thank you for sharing your journey! I backpacked thru Chiang Mai/ Northern Thailand area and miss it dearly!!!! Have a beautiful day my friend 😊
  3. Something’s in the air, I couldn’t sleep last night either! 😊
  4. Goal attend yoga at a real studio 1x per week to build community I went today and it felt awesome! May all beings everywhere be happy and free 😊 what was beautiful about my day yoga. I actually talked to 2 new people! And of course my kids.
  5. Quote of the Day Rivers know this. There is no hurry. We shall get there some day. -Winnie the Pooh Experiencing healing. Surrendering more to the flow of life. I read an amazing article that said “anxiety is caused by repressing our feelings. We have learned that emotions are dangerous; so when they bubble up, the body sends out signals of danger and pain”. This was true for me. Unlearning that emotions are bad. Feeling everything today. Letting the emotion spread so big it feels the room, the earth. Leaning into the sensations. What was beautiful about my day fall leaves, pumpkins and kids.
  6. Hi!!! So glad to see you are doing well!! I have found this community to be much more compassionate then some of the other forums I have been a part of. Another forum I was on basically said I had an addiction and I needed a mental health professional. They basically just made me feel worse!!!!! I think people pysho analyze truly because they are trying to help. Even if the help is not asked for!!! Everyone has their own perspective and lens thru which they look at the world. 😊 Sorry about your trip to the casino. I can totally relate. I always felt so out of place when visiting. All the lights and sounds were over stimulating and everyone looked pretty sad. But at least you tried a new experience and now you have learned!!! I love reading your journal. So proud of you my friend!!! 😊😊😊
  7. One month!!!!!! Woohooo!! Ok so I was looking back to see what day I was on, and then saw that it’s been 1 month!! I can’t even believe it. I have tried so many times to quit before. So so many times. The only thing that is different now is this community! I love reading your journals, watching your progress, sharing in your success! One big difference I have noticed is that I am not searching for these dopamine hits anymore. I used to game, then go to social media to look for likes, the go to YouTube. Constantly searching for that next rush. Since I have quit gaming I notice that my impulsive actions have gone way down. I have quit social media for a bit... for me it’s a negative influence right now. And urge to incessantly watch videos has decreased as well. Over all I am much more present. Spending much less time on screens and much more time in real life! I have not talked much about my spiritually, but I have a deep faith in GOD. My relationship is with him become so much stronger and I feel held and carried during the hard moments of my day. My help comes from the LORD the maker of heaven and earth. 💙💙💙 I am going to be switching things up a bit now. I need to focus on some goals to fill in the missing gaps of my life. The main one I am working on right now is community. I am going to come up with some goals to build community, maybe a weekly goal? We will see. For the first time in so long I feel so much hope. What was beautiful about my day laughter and tears. Loving hugs and snuggles with my children. 💙💙😊💙
  8. Thank you my friend! We are all learning as we go along, and holding each other up the best we know how. Little steps, one breath at a time. Small changes, which turn into big translations. 😊 Hope you are having a wonderful day!
  9. Thanks my friend!! Have a beautiful day!!
  10. Yes!!!! Congrats on your 1 year! This is amazing and I am so proud of you!!!! I resonate with so much of the advice in your post. Especially when you talk about gaming being a mental/emotional support column. Seeking gaming for friends, purpose and escape is what so many of us struggle with!!! I also agree with the gaming in moderation. The couple of threads I read involved members who had a total relapse. Thank you for sharing your journal! And showing up for everyone in the community! I hope you are having a beautiful day my friend!!!!!
  11. Hi! I feel that you are so brave for posting, and your journal will resonate with many who are reading, but not necessarily joining the forum. As the above poster mentioned, there are a handful of female posters. I actually went to go look for them..... they are a couple pages back but their journeys are well worth the read!!!! I am glad to hear about your knitting adventure! Yes I found crafters of all sorts to be very different than the stereotype that is given to them. And I think it’s an awesome way to redirect mental energy... and create really cool pieces!!!! I think stepping out into safe real life communities is key to recover. Online stuff is great but we are meant for real person interaction!!! Yes, I struggle very much with social media... and I am putting the idea of rejoining on the back burner until I can further heal. I think it’s a tool and can be neutral, but for me right now the experience is negative. I love reading your thread and keep up the good work!!! Look forward to reading your posts! Have a beautiful day my friend.
  12. Hi my friend, Thank you so much for your comment. It makes me feel seen, heard and validated. 😊 When I first joined this community, I wasn’t quite sure to what expect.... but what I have found is a loving caring place, with people who have a bit of pain, and who are journeying together in compassion. I relate to what you are saying with regards to the feeling of shame. I have not written about it here, but when I needed support during some of the hard times in my life, I was met with anger and disdain. I have learned that I have a deep belief that I am worthless. Working with different meditation teachers like Jack Kornfield to hold space for the pain, but also hold space for the love and realizing that my heart is big enough to hold all of it. 💙 May I be held in love. May you be held in love. May we be held in compassion. Thank you for your kind words and holding space for so many in this community. Have a beautiful day my friend.
  13. Hi! Thank you for your comment. I found this gem at my local free library down the street! I would recommend to anyone looking for a thought provoking book. Thank you for the advice. I am in the process of questioning what is true. Does this ring true for me? Does this sit well with my heart. It’s a bit of a journey. Have a beautiful day my friend.
  14. Hi!!! I am so glad you’re here! I really relate to your posts. I too used gaming to escape the emotional pain of my husband’s affair. I just could not deal with it. The pain was so intense that I felt dead. The only thing that made me feel anything was playing. I have taken up knitting and maybe I could learn a few pointers from you. All I know is the knit and pearl stitch. But I keep messing up, then I have to undo the loops to correct my mistakes! I am trying to get through a beginners pair of gloves. And I also hear you on the social anxiety. I don’t have social media accounts as the information is just to much for me to consume and I make it into a negative experience. I am trying to build up the courage to join LinkIn for job purposes, but it terrifies me. Showing up is something that I am working on slowly! Sending hugs to you my friend. Please keep posting.... you’re doing great!!!
  15. Day 26!!!!! Most influential book. Eckhart Tolle - Power of Now. What was beautiful about my day. My kids and morning meditation. 💙💙💙💙
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