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About Bugg

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  1. Well, February wasn't as epic as January, to say the least. It wasn't a total write off, I got some shit done, but not as much as I did in January. It's a battle of healthy vs toxic productivity, how to give myself a break without getting lazy again. I've played games, a lot at the start and end of the month with a gap in the middle. Netflix was a big issue again; I've decided to ban having a watch list. If I want to watch something on an evening then cool, but having a list of shit to watch just makes me obsess over it and watch crap for the sake of it. I'm still not ready to let go of gaming
  2. I genuinely love your gratitude lists 🙂
  3. Congrats on breaking your record, keep going! Good luck with the new place too, got my fingers crossed for ya 🙂
  4. Dude you're doing so well. Reading over your posts and you've made so much progress already, it's awesome! Sorry to hear about the money troubles but I'm glad you're getting on top of them now 🙂 I often feel like this too - but you didn't ask to be put here so you can't completely blame yourself. Even in feeling like you could have done better by now; I feel like you're doing your best (even on our worst days we are often still trying our best in that moment, right?) I think your list of achievements looks great, just raising kids that turn out well is a massive achievement
  5. [Day 31] I did it. I actually made it. 30 days. No Games, No Netflix, No Youtube and No Social Media. Well, a little social media, perhaps an hour a week .. and I watched one Youtube video with otters yesterday, which only made me angry that people keep them as pets. But I'd call this month a success, especially since I'm still not working and so spent almost the whole time at home. I nearly gave in on a few occasions, either through total and utter boredom, or because I felt so anxious or overwhelmed that I wanted the escape. On either occasion I sat with my discomfort until I eve
  6. [Day 17] Quick check in, still going strong. No games, Netflix, or Youtube except for the yoga video's I use daily. The news app on my phone is a bit of an issue, it's got an infinite scrolling feature like most social medias so that's hard to control sometimes. I'm losing an hour to that here and there, and facebook hasn't been totally absent - though I have used it less and I am being much more mindful.. I need to remember to set a timer before I engage with these things.. The first 2 weeks were pretty tough, I thought I'd have more energy and motivation but I had even less. I've f
  7. Spent the day reviewing paper journals from the last 3 years, analyzing thought patterns and common issues. Reviewed my old GQ journal in detail, making a list of observations that may prove useful moving forwards. I have not yet committed to giving up games forever, but I am committing to 30 days of no games, Netflix, YouTube, social media or digital escape of any kind (apart from the yoga practice I follow on YouTube). I have also committed to 30 days of yoga alongside this, and hope to tick off my other habits each day throughout the month; meditation and music (mainly piano, but singing an
  8. A new journey. My old journal is past now, lets begin anew.
  9. Good luck! We are all here to hold each other accountable. You got this!
  10. @BryanJaz Congratulations on 100 days!! It sucks that you haven't heard back about your interview yet, especially when you were told you would. That's happened to me a few times in the past too, it's so frustrating trying to decide what is the right thing to do. Limbo is one of the worst feelings in my opinion, I'd much rather know either way so that I can either let go and move onto something else or prepare for a new chapter. Limbo is just drifting, it's an awful feeling. Perhaps it would be worth contacting them, maybe give them a call rather than an email; you could explain that you
  11. That sounds like the perfect homestead! I'd add a little reading nook too, a comfy seat recessed into a bay window looking out into the garden. Rescued chickens pecking away. I dream of these sorts of things too, but also end up dismissing them as they don't feel realistic. I remember once telling my dad about my dream life, very similar to what you describe, a self sufficient, simple and minimal one. He told me I'd need to marry a millionaire, lol, cheers dad. I don't want to have to rely on anyone else but myself in life, and whilst I get that a life like that might need an investment t
  12. Yeah, taking the medication wasn’t the best experience. I think things weren’t as regulated back then either tbh, I’m 30 now so it was a good while back. I decided to stop taking meds when I was 13, although they’d have happily let me stay on it :s I was re diagnosed as an adult and now I’m on a waiting list for an autism screening too, they offered the ADHD meds to me again recently but I decided against it, it can cause psychosis in adults and we already have a history of the disease in our family, I was shocked they were so willing to prescribe to be honest. Ah that’s a really good p
  13. Another reminder to myself, leaving that here to reflect upon later. I am still plagued with the same feelings of guilt for pretty much the same reasons. I think I feel worse these days, after many failed attempts to realise my dreams I feel directionless. This causes me to feel intense anxiety, and often self loathing.
  14. Reminder from Day 30 reflection from previous journal. I still do these things, 2 years on. Something to be mindful of. ..and just to note.. looking back at advice from others I really do see it through a different lens now, it really is helpful down the line even if I might not see it in the moment.
  15. That is really interesting. I have to fight the urge to be defensive when it comes to this stuff, even thought there is really no need to be. I was diagnosed at a very early age (4), but still food for thought and especially relevant for those diagnosed in later life and without reflection upon early childhood experience. I guess it’s possible for kids to burn out their receptors, but at that age I don’t think I was doing much different to other kids my age regarding recreational activity. I don’t think I got my first console until I was maybe 6 or 7 and I didn’t really watch much tv either.