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TheNewMe2.0's Journal - A Better Life


TheNewMe2.0
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@Marek I was almost through season two of my hero, but didn't want to pay the subscription fee to VRV. I might get a subscription to funimation so I can finish Dragonball, but I have to get up every episode to re-fullscreen the window when I hook my laptop up to the TV (T.T). It's a big sacrifice, lol. I like sitting down for long periods watching tv. For now I'm watching stuff on Netflix. It doesn't cost me any money because my cellphone carrier includes it with our plan and I don't have to get up every time the episode changes. Although VRV didn't have that issue so I could watch Naruto and My Hero on there if I was willing to pay the 12$ a month or whatever it is.

Anyways! I'll have to checkout Code Geass. I saw it's on Netflix and I put it on my list of anime. If you have any other show referrals for Netflix anime or whatever I'm all ears. Lots of time in the quarantine now. I read through all of mist born and the first two books from the storm light archive. I recently tried to read some of Oathbringer but it made me kind of get depressed and like .  . . freak out? We all have issues and mine can get weird sometimes. I have schizoaffective disorder (schizophrenia+depression). Sanderson is pretty entertaining although in edge dancer, where there are Gods that eat peoples souls to survive. It was sort of anticlimactic with the whole 'good guy always prevails' scenario playing out. His books do have some intense dark stuff in them too! Like when protagonists get tortured and stuff. I remember being horrified for like weeks before I went back and finished the book, but it ended up being a good read so whatever.  

Day 129 NP 98 Np 83 Med 69

Positive post: Still trucking at four months plus, Lowering medication (god help me) and hopefully gonna do okay at my job still employed at least despite some strifes for now.

I am fully committed to quitting gaming and staying stopped! Forget gaming. I can live a better life without it as my journal title suggests. Man I seriously just chilled all day today as I had the day off. Aside from like 20 minutes of paperwork in the morning I just sat on the couch most of the day reading and watching tv. I did go for a walk and did some calisthenics. I love doing calisthenics I hope I can continue to do them and don't run out of energy like I did with the weights 😕 I'd be fine with it if I could mix up calisthenics, yoga and walking/running. I think it may be possible in the future as I decrease my medications. I felt that being on medication has greatly increased the time I spend sleeping as well as my fatigue levels during the day. I'm not entirely sure that's what's causing my ailments right now, but I feel like I want to try something. Because its kind of getting worse. I'm feeling sleepier and sleepier. Sleeping more and more. I wonder if I'd stay in bed all day if I didn't have to eat or go to the bathroom. 

I'm kind of sad because my moms working now so I don't get to see her much. She works like 60 hour weeks although her job is easy. I still get to go on walks with her if I coordinate them. It makes me wish I had a little dog to keep me company. Maybe a girl chihuahua or some other small dog. But I probably won't have time to care for a dog once I'm working again. As long as I get to keep my job I'll most likely be a full time in person employee post pandemic. Watching a lot of shows felt good for me today. It was kind of liberating and helped me overcome some anxiety by watching the shows that I was just a tiny bit uncomfortable with. I just finished the neighbor which was entertaining. I really cared a lot about the best friend characters relationship haha. Maybe I identify with being that best friend of the cool guy. I was once the cool guy though in high school for a time. Every dog has its' day. 

I'm reading models. I watching Cam's most recent video and it inspired me to keep trying to read models. Who knows maybe I'll even get through NMMNG after models. It'll probably take a few weeks to finish models though. It's a really good read so far, lots of interesting stuff about being non-needy. It reminds me of the Buddhist ideal of have no attachments and non-grasping. It's like when you're totally content in yourself you're the most attractive version of yourself. Well that was a nice long post 🙂 

I smiled at Kim's convenience show.

I accomplished drinking lots of water.

I am grateful for my martial arts skills, yoga skills, calisthenics skills, Korean calendar, the morning, the sun, the moon, stars, god, Krishna, buddha, and aliens. and Star Trek.

I hope everyone's safe.

Erik 

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@Erik2.0 I use 9.anime or Kissanime to watch anime usually. Yeah I would definitely recommend watching Code Geass. I had a brief look at Netflix and the ones that are there and really like are Death note, Fate Stay Night Unlimited Blade works, SAO, Black Lagoon and I have heard that Erased is great but I have not watched it yet myself.

That's cool, yeah Sandersons is a great author. I have finished the original Mistborn trilogy a few days ago and now I am reading the first book of the Stormlight archive. I can see that if it is too violent it might cause some distress. The other book that I have on my list that I want to read is The Blade Itself for which I have heard great reviews. It is apparently a very violent dark fantasy though. 

Sometimes having a relaxing day is great. I usually get angry at myself if I do not do much during the day but in all honesty now I think it is better to just enjoy it and use the rest to be able to do more the next day. I have read models a few years ago and it is a really good book. I am not sure if you have read The Subtle art of not Giving a Fuck too but I would say that I have enjoyed that one even more. 

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@Marek Cool I'll probably try that book out. I heard those sites are like semi-illegal or sketchy in some way so I avoided them. Idk if they actually are. I'm glad you're liking Sanderson and thanks for the anime list note taken. Maybe I'll warm back up to fantasy who knows. I really like my days on the couch. I get up to exercise once a day so that's something I'm not a total potato.

Day 130 NF 1 Np 84 Med 70

Positive post: I'm restarting my nofapping, I went for a walk and I read for two hours.

Yes I decided I prefer to nofap rather than to masturbate. I think it's just better for my energy and state of mind overall. Plus it's one less thing to think about or do. It's too bad I have to restart the counter when it was at 90 days+, but that's okay. At least now I'm more certain that I want to do nofap. I like that it seems more in line with what the Bible's saying to do. 

I went for a walk now I'm kind of tired. I'm decreasing medication to hopefully regain some energy and sleep stuff. We'll see how that goes. If I feel I have more energy later maybe I'll do a little yoga. I'd like to memorize a series and do it regularly. I did an interesting exercise with my friend where we plotted out a soulmate sort of thing. I think it's good and I'll do my best to keep practicing it. I think I'm going to try to write some poems just to do something and connect with my friend who does it. If you know any good poets to recommend for reading let me know.

I smiled at my book models, kind of funny sometimes.

I accomplished getting up on time.

I am grateful for god, my future wife, reading, intellectual stimulation, GQ, food, cooking, air, water and my kitchen.

I hope everyone's kicking butt today.

God bless

Erik

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5 hours ago, Erik2.0 said:

@Marek Cool I'll probably try that book out. I heard those sites are like semi-illegal or sketchy in some way so I avoided them. Idk if they actually are. I'm glad you're liking Sanderson and thanks for the anime list note taken. Maybe I'll warm back up to fantasy who knows. I really like my days on the couch. I get up to exercise once a day so that's something I'm not a total potato.

Day 130 NF 1 Np 84 Med 70

Positive post: I'm restarting my nofapping, I went for a walk and I read for two hours.

Yes I decided I prefer to nofap rather than to masturbate. I think it's just better for my energy and state of mind overall. Plus it's one less thing to think about or do. It's too bad I have to restart the counter when it was at 90 days+, but that's okay. At least now I'm more certain that I want to do nofap. I like that it seems more in line with what the Bible's saying to do. 

I went for a walk now I'm kind of tired. I'm decreasing medication to hopefully regain some energy and sleep stuff. We'll see how that goes. If I feel I have more energy later maybe I'll do a little yoga. I'd like to memorize a series and do it regularly. I did an interesting exercise with my friend where we plotted out a soulmate sort of thing. I think it's good and I'll do my best to keep practicing it. I think I'm going to try to write some poems just to do something and connect with my friend who does it. If you know any good poets to recommend for reading let me know.

I smiled at my book models, kind of funny sometimes.

I accomplished getting up on time.

I am grateful for god, my future wife, reading, intellectual stimulation, GQ, food, cooking, air, water and my kitchen.

I hope everyone's kicking butt today.

God bless

Erik

I'm struggling with nofap big time. I got long streaks without it and then i just watch porn every day. It's exhausting.

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@BooksandTrees Yeah that last streak of 90 days was the best I ever did. I kind of started thinking that it was better to masturbate. But after doing it I realized I preferred no fap. It's more like peaceful and time efficient. I felt like I had more energy.

Day 131 NF 2 Np 85 Med 71

Positive post: I went for a nice walk with my mom, I saw two clients and I looked up shows to watch.

Okay, short post today. I'm trying to squeeze in a little tv with mom before I go meditate and sleep. I can probably only watch one episode of a show. Or I can go to sleep half an hour late that'll probably be it. I'm feeling like I have more energy and need less sleep since I lowered my medication dosage. I'm hoping I'll be able to fully get off risperdol and it will improve my sleep/energy a lot. Really hoping on that. My emotions have been more sensitive and it's a little harder to just get by mentally though since lowering the meds. So I'll see what happens. Maybe I'll end up keeping just one of the original three pills going and see how that fares for me.

I smiled at my clients.

I accomplished drinking lots of water. 

I am grateful for cheese, turkey, tomato, avocado, mustard, sandwiches, blankets, pillows, socks and feet.

God bless

Erik

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@Erik2.0 As far as I know they are not illegal because you do not share anything personally but they are in the grey area. I just hate the streaming service these days. Way too many of them and none of them offers everything you might be interested in. So I am down for the free alternative especially nowadays as I am quite low on funds as a student. Well let me know if you enjoy them. Nice, even a little exercise a day can improve the mood.

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@Marek Well if they're not illegal then I guess it's okay. It does suck that you can't get everything you want on one streaming service. Like Naruto and Dragon ball are always separate. I'm trying to save money too. I'm graduated so I have debt. I'm still in the process of seeing if I like any of these anime. I'm kind of picky and usually go for comedy anime's. Exercise is good when you are able to do it. I tried to squat today and my legs got all crampy. We'll see how it goes tomorrow. 

Day 132 NF 3 Np 86 Med 72

Positive post: I feel good about nofapping, I did get some exercise today, It's nice weather out.

I'm feeling pretty full from some curry and brown rice. We've been cooking every day since the quarantine. It's going well to save money. No gas and no eating out means I'm saving everything I earn. Also I'm getting my hours in with Telehealth. I feel kind of woozy and out of it. I was super awake last night for some reason and couldn't get to sleep. I Guess I'm supposed to get up and read something if that happens. I'm honestly kind of tired of monitoring how I'm feeling. I'm trying more to just do what I want to do and keep trying. Just to not obsess over what I'm feeling, but to recognize it and move on. The cherry blossom trees are really nice outside. I've been going on walks almost everyday and it's good to get to see some nature. Although I'm really introverted and don't feel that comfortable walking with other people. 

I'm just scared that quitting meds won't work. I'll go crazy. I'll feel tired or not able to sleep. etc. But god's in control. Everything will be okay. I'll just keep doing the best I can to take care of myself and that's all that I can do.

I smiled at my weights because it's fun to workout.

I accomplished doing three ab exercises.

I am grateful for weights, exercise, muscle building, body building, chargers, digital books, tv, plants, rocks and pots.

God bless

Erik

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Day 133 NF 4 Np 87 Med 73

Positive post: I'm back on meds, I talked to my psychiatrist and I'm walking everyday.

They say that walking or getting any exercise 15+ minutes a day is really good for making you happier. It's a good antidepressant. So I'm happy that I'm walking regularly now. I'm grateful that my mom got me walking because I think it's good for my mental health. I've been doing at least 5000 steps a day on average. Sometimes closer to 10k. I'm grateful for WhytManga and @Laurie who showed me his channel. I learned some good things from his tutorials. It feels like I'm barely progressing at all, but I have faith that if I just keep drawing each day I'll get better over time. I'm grateful for the slight edge which is helping me see how important things like focusing on the positive and gratitude are. Watching Saiki K is really enjoyable for me. I sit there with a smile on my face and laugh at the jokes. Even if I'm not in a good mood before I watch it it puts me in a good mood after. The jokes are really funny. I'm trying out gratitude journaling. Just journaling things that I'm grateful for. Seems kind of nice, they recommended it in the slight edge.

I smiled at Saiki K.

I accomplished seeing a client.

I am grateful for my mom, walking, saiki, Laurie, whytmanga, the slight edge, my orange eraser, black mechanical pencil, kindle and remote control.

God bless

Erik

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You've motivated me. I'm going to commit to walking every day, especially now that it's somewhat nice out. I've been really unwell mentally over the past week and a half at least.

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16 hours ago, ceponatia said:

You've motivated me. I'm going to commit to walking every day, especially now that it's somewhat nice out. I've been really unwell mentally over the past week and a half at least.

Shit. Something inside me just clicked too. Imma go shower and take a walk right now...

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@Erik2.0 I see. If you have any comedy anime to recommend I am all ears. My favorite comedy anime would be Konosuba probably. I have always been a fan of isekai anime and the way Konosuba turns the ide on its head is just hilarious. That is awesome, I think that regular exercise is one of the best things for mental health and even if you overdo it one day and get sore I would recommend do some exercise on the next day which helps with the soreness. 

@ceponatia @Phoenixking For about last week I try to achieve to go for a run or at least walk and it is amazing especially during these quarantine times considering how nice it is out. Two things that keep me motivated are exploring new parts of the city which I have not done before and to my surprise, there are tons of beautiful places which I have not seen yet. The second is the Zombie Run app which I have only used for 2 runs but it is a great way of implementing game mechanics into running which makes me want to run daily even though I suck at running big time haha. 

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@ceponatia @Phoenixking You guys are awesome! Yes go for walks it's good for you. Even just getting outside is really helpful for mental health. I went and did a few sets of squats in my backyard and feel so much better now. 🙂

@Marek I heard Konosuba is awesome from someone else too. I'll see if it's on Netflix. Good for you running. Keep it up Husein Bolt. Maybe I'll progress to running someday. For now I'm happy walking.

Day 134 NF 5 Np 88 Med 74

Positive post: I drank over a liter of water, did sixty air squats and enjoyed being outside.

I think getting just over a liter of water a day is good enough for me. I'm always happy when I finish my 40oz bottle. Doing three sets of twenty squats is a lot for me. I felt all groggy, but when I went to the lawn in my backyard to do squats. I felt a lot more energy and did them all. It makes me want to try and do more exercises out there. It's not the most even ground, but I can kind of make it work. My therapist told me to spend time outside and so I spent some time just standing out in the sun today. It made me feel a lot better especially doing some squats out there. I've been fighting with my mom because she pushes me really hard to work harder and harder at my career. Then I get upset at her for being so mean while pushing me. It's really upsetting to think about. She just doesn't care if she hurts my feelings as long as she pushes me to work. She thinks it justifies upsetting me. I wish I could make her understand that it's not okay to hurt my feelings even if it's to try and further my career. But I guess I don't have the power to change others. So I'm just going to not talk to her much about my career if at all. Then she can't freak out and push me towards it in a way that makes me want to die. Seriously it makes me want to die having her be mean and push me like she did two days ago. It's worth it to me to avoid the emotional distress that was recently caused to me. Even if that means that I won't have my mom's advice and help in my career. Which she has been helpful in just also very harmful too.

On gratitude. I'm grateful for my community here. For all the exercises I can do. Exercising makes me so much happier and satisfied with life. Even if I can't do a lot of heavy weight lifting. Just doing push ups and knee raises makes me happy. Especially when I'm able to do more than I did last week. And for all the lamps in my house. They keep things nice and hygge. My mom, dad, money, house, rent free living, and free food. Thanks mom. You give me lots of things for free that I wouldn't be able to afford on my own. Without you I'd probably be totally broke and not have made it as far in my career as I have. Even though you're too mean to me when you push me to work at my career. You have helped me get my career going a lot better than if I didn't have you I think.

I smiled at my client 🙂

I accomplished doing 60 squats ya!

I'm going to keep my gratitude list in the main body of the text like I did in this entry so I can expand on the things I'm grateful for.

God bless

Erik

Edited by Erik2.0
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Day 135 NF 1 Np 89 Med 75

Positive post: I made breakfast, I napped and I finished work for the week.

Okay I relapsed on nofap after watching some anime that was too provocative for me. It also was too much like gaming for me to deal with anyways as well. Blah. That's okay. Fall seven times get up eight. I've been sleeping a lot which has started happening since quarantine. I used to be upset, but now I'm kind of happy. It feels good to sleep so much for some reason. I just hope I'm able to function and fulfill all my job duties without being too tired once the quarantine lifts. It's looking like I'll maybe switch to an at home workout post-Q (Post-Quarrantine). I've been looking at a set of dip bars to use at home. Other than that I'll do deadlift, curls, db for shoulders and everything else bodyweight exercises. I hope it goes well. I feel like I may have finally gotten to the point where I know what to do to workout without getting injured. 🙂 

I'm grateful for my mom. We made up well and with the help of my therapist I did I statements with her to resolve our conflict better. I also accepted that I don't have the power to change her like my TP said as well. I'm grateful for all my gamequitters on here. Maybe I'll start listening to the podcast again on walks. I haven't been since I don't drive anymore. I'm grateful for the takeout we got last night even though it was too spicy for me. It was just nice to know my mom loves me so much she wanted to get me takeout when I said I wanted it. GF: Plums, plum trees, red leaves, red, twigs, branches and the wind.

I smiled at the Bible, good book.

I accomplished taking meds.

God bless 

Erik

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Day 136 NF 2 Np 90 Med 76

Positive post: I cooked a ton of spaghetti, I drew and watched tv.

I'm trying to lose weight so I'm watching Saiki and not eating much. I even took a smaller portion of spaghetti than usual. Chiyo from Saiki is my inspiration. She is always dieting super hard to get a hot body to impress the guy she likes. Drawing was chill. I'm just aiming to do a drawing and a tutorial each day. Maybe 10-30 minutes. I wrote a Sanryu which is like a big haiku. Oh yeah, I did chakra meditation which lasted an hour or so. It was a group zoom meeting. I felt a little uncomfortable but it was bearable I suppose. It's my friends group. I watched a ton of tv. It was good. Haha. I also worked out and went for a walk. My workouts have been getting so tiring (and I don't do that much). That I'm going to try working out only two days a week and trying to get some yoga in on the other days. It's my hope that yoga will make me less tired and more energetic than typical body weight exercises. I'm still going to get at least one go at squats push ups deadlift, pull up and abs a week though. It's kind of saddening to lower to only two days a week. Maybe I could try four. Somewhere from 2-4. I was thinking of joining a yoga studio once CV is over. Might workout. That'd be nice if it did. Then I could psychologically deal with cutting workouts to two days a week because I'd be getting so much yoga exercise the other 5 days. 

I'm grateful: for all the food I get to eat. My mom pays for groceries and it's really wonderful to get to eat high quality food for free 🙂 . For my clothes, they keep me covered and are generally pretty comfortable. For my blanket which could probably do with a washing because I use it so much on the couch. haha 😄 . My working hands, job, time off, fence for privacy, emojis, peace and love.

I smiled at saiki.

I accomplished doing the dishes.

God bless

Erik 

Edited by Erik2.0
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18 hours ago, Erik2.0 said:

Chiyo from Saiki is my inspiration. She is always dieting super hard to get a hot body to impress the guy she likes.

I don't want to rain on your parade, but this does not really sound healthy to me. And it's cool you're keeping a keen eye on how much you eat, but if you work out, keep in mind that you need enough fuel to make your body do the exercises. Good luck keeping up all your good habits, looks like you're doing a lot of cool shit!

Edited by Phoenixking
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@Phoenixking I am still getting enough protein and everything. I'm basically just eating two meals a day instead of three. Which is kind of extreme, but I think I'm getting enough nutrients still. I just want visible abs (T.T) Starving for a six pack here. If I feel like I don't have energy from starving I'll eat some more. Thanks for you support. Loving those push ups and hobbies man. 

Day 137 NF 3 Np 91 Med 77

Positive post: I drew, I talked with my dad and I didn't watch tv yet today and it's six pm.

Showing my dad my recent drawings inspired me to draw more. I'm into MangaWhyt's  anatomy drawing series linked below.

Sorry for the giant link I don't know how to make it smaller haha 😄 .

I decided to keep tv watching to 2 hours a day max. It's going well. Yesterday was just a little too much for me is all. I lost six pounds down to 182 from 188 in the past week. I didn't really diet at all I just switched from weight training to bodyweight training. So I think I'm losing muscle T.T. It's okay this will hopefully be a wonderful injury free muscle building program that I'm able to do for all the days of my life. God bless it. 

I started doing a 'soulmate visualization/manifestation meditation.' My friend who is way into chakra meditation and things of that nature taught it to me. It's been going well. I basically just visualize a soulmate and hang out with her, visualize getting together etc. It makes me feel really good and comfortable with girls. I also feel more optimistic about dating in the future. The hope and promise is that it can actually help me find the girl I'm visualizing. Cool stuff. Hope it works, fingers crossed. If not it's still a great exercise for my mind.

I'm grateful for MWhyt's anatomy drawing classes. There are 23! That's so awesome I can learn so much for free, yay! I took some portrait drawing lessons too from EricanthonyJ on YouTube. That lesson was really helpful and made my portraits of people a lot better. Which is one of my art goals: to get good at drawing portraits of people. Also MW's page is basically teaching you how to draw your own comic so who knows maybe I'll actually draw my own comic book. That'd be mind-blowing and awesome if that actually happened. For now I'm just drawing what I can though 🙂 I'm grateful for my at home workout. I did push ups, ball sit ups and 9mins yoga along with a long walk probably 10k steps today. I'm basically doing legs push pull workout and just keep cycling those then take a day off if I feel tired. I tend to want to workout everyday, it's probably good to force myself to take a day off though maybe idk my workouts aren't very hard and don't use hardly any weights so maybe everyday is fine. Today was my day off from my program but I still felt like doing push ups and dips etc. I'm grateful for all my game quitters on here supporting each other and helping each other keep it together, lamps, flowers, green nature, brains, gray matter, ellipticals and friends. ❤️ 

I smiled at my reflection.

I accomplished drawing for like an hour.

God bless

Erik

Edited by Erik2.0
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3 hours ago, Erik2.0 said:

@Phoenixking I am still getting enough protein and everything. I'm basically just eating two meals a day instead of three. Which is kind of extreme, but I think I'm getting enough nutrients still. I just want visible abs (T.T) Starving for a six pack here. If I feel like I don't have energy from starving I'll eat some more. Thanks for you support. Loving those push ups and hobbies man. 

Day 137 NF 3 Np 91 Med 77

Positive post: I drew, I talked with my dad and I didn't watch tv yet today and it's six pm.

Showing my dad my recent drawings inspired me to draw more. I'm into MangaWhyt's  anatomy drawing series linked below.

Sorry for the giant link I don't know how to make it smaller haha 😄 .

I decided to keep tv watching to 2 hours a day max. It's going well. Yesterday was just a little too much for me is all. I lost six pounds down to 182 from 188 in the past week. I didn't really diet at all I just switched from weight training to bodyweight training. So I think I'm losing muscle T.T. It's okay this will hopefully be a wonderful injury free muscle building program that I'm able to do for all the days of my life. God bless it. 

I started doing a 'soulmate visualization/manifestation meditation.' My friend who is way into chakra meditation and things of that nature taught it to me. It's been going well. I basically just visualize a soulmate and hang out with her, visualize getting together etc. It makes me feel really good and comfortable with girls. I also feel more optimistic about dating in the future. The hope and promise is that it can actually help me find the girl I'm visualizing. Cool stuff. Hope it works, fingers crossed. If not it's still a great exercise for my mind.

I'm grateful for MWhyt's anatomy drawing classes. There are 23! That's so awesome I can learn so much for free, yay! I took some portrait drawing lessons too from EricanthonyJ on YouTube. That lesson was really helpful and made my portraits of people a lot better. Which is one of my art goals: to get good at drawing portraits of people. Also MW's page is basically teaching you how to draw your own comic so who knows maybe I'll actually draw my own comic book. That'd be mind-blowing and awesome if that actually happened. For now I'm just drawing what I can though 🙂 I'm grateful for my at home workout. I did push ups, ball sit ups and 9mins yoga along with a long walk probably 10k steps today. I'm basically doing legs push pull workout and just keep cycling those then take a day off if I feel tired. I tend to want to workout everyday, it's probably good to force myself to take a day off though maybe idk my workouts aren't very hard and don't use hardly any weights so maybe everyday is fine. Today was my day off from my program but I still felt like doing push ups and dips etc. I'm grateful for all my game quitters on here supporting each other and helping each other keep it together, lamps, flowers, green nature, brains, gray matter, ellipticals and friends. ❤️ 

I smiled at my reflection.

I accomplished drawing for like an hour.

God bless

Erik

6 lbs is a lot. I've been sticking to like 1 lb per week and just seeing how that goes. I think Buff Dudes and jeff Nipard have good videos on cutting and bulking healthily. As long as you're not starving yourself I can't really say anything. Sounds like you had a really productive day so that is good.

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@Erik2.0 Great to hear that you are doing well. On the dieting note. Do you count calories too? If not, I would highly recommend it. It is the best way to see exactly how much you have consumed and how much more you still need. The early loss of weight is usually mainly water weight but be careful with the amount of calories and protein you consume because if you decrease your intake by 500 or fewer calories you might lose lean mass too. 

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@BooksandTrees Yes I saw Jeff Nipper's video on cutting. I'm trying to lower my calories, but it's hard when you don't count calories. I guess just eating smaller meals in general might have the desired effect. Doing two meals a day was too little food. Also most of that 6 lbs was muscle loss haha. 

@Marek I don't count calories. I was hoping I could find a way to lose a little fat without counting them. Smaller portions and more cardio? 

Day 138 NF 4 Np 92 Med 78

Positive post: saw my clients, got mass groceries and showered.

I'm looking to work more hours since CV happened. Yay. It's easier to work from home because I don't have to drive so I'm able to work more hours, this is great 😄 .

I am grateful for my eliptical which provides me with cardio when I don't feel like walking, but I can't do it everyday because it was hurting my back. My weights which I deadlifted with today and keep my back healthy, my free bible which provides me with love, hope and confidence, such a great thing to have and it was free! The slight edge which inspires me to keep working at everything bit by bit even my yoga practice which is at about 9 minutes a day is worth doing because it may grow, my houseplants which provide me with oxygen and love, my mom who cooks, cleans and loves me too, everyone who I interact with on here that offer me so much support, growth and inspiration and helpful advice, my couch which I'm able to sit comfortably on for so many hours a day while I work, puppies, kittens, grass, dirt, rocks, precious stones, all the good food I like, the Simpsons, and anime.

I smiled at my mom.

I accomplished working out lower body.

God bless

Erik

 

I wrote this poem for people on this forum. Everyone read it: @Icandothis @BooksandTrees @Marek @The Doctor @Phoenixking 

Newcomers

This is for all my quitters game quitters.

Who in life weren't always heavy hitters.

But here and now we find strength together.

Awkward at times, though it may seem unsure.

Let's band together and fight through each day.

One step at a time and abstain from play.

Don't give up we will read and like your post.

For hope just think of who loves you the most.

Take some time to meditate and to sit.

Just know I believe that you can do it.

Edited by Erik2.0
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Just one or two things about losing weight. I don't like cardio very much. It is exhausting and requires a lot time and effort. And weight lifting is not only more fun to me, but also more effective in terms of weight loss, since you need to get your metabolism up. Otherwise, your metabolism will decrease and goes into a state of emergency, until you up your calorie intake again. But that is a personal preference: If you enjoy running or cardio then go for it.

Another thing: The whole idea should not be a short term deal. Just losing some weight, because the summer is coming and you need to look good at the beach is not enough. What happens after the summer? No, the goal should be, to sustain something that you can do not just for a short timeframe, but forever- until you die. I want to look good not just for a couple of months, but forever. Right? So, therefore, forget all diet changes, which involve getting rid of everything for a short time. Instead, start thinking about food in terms of how it can be beneficial to you. 

Let's talk about vegetables for a second. They are beneficial and better then a lot of the stuff, we eat today. So, it makes sense to eat more of that. Think about, how much vegetables you can eat to reach the same amount of calories in comparison with a portion of noodles. I promise you, you will be filled completely. This is almost impossible to eat so much. Basically, drinking a glass of water before every meal and eating a bunch of vegetables will make you quite full to begin with and you will eat less other stuff. That is a good starting point. Then you think, what you can do instead to improve your diet? You start to throw out the bad stuff and replace it with better things. Maybe get rid of cola and drink water. Maybe get rid of sweets and eat more protein stuff. Whatever it is. It is the same with every other addiction. Don't just try to get rid of something. Instead, add something better! 

Couting calories can actually be quite useful in this process. Nothing, you should do forever. This is more a thing of experimenting and learning, how much you put into your mouth with certain kinds of foood. That can be quite shocking sometimes. A theoretical example: If you eat 100 grams of muffins, this might be something like 377 calories according to google. Just in theory - muffins are quite different. Now, lets compare this with cucumbers. A cucumber has around 15 calories. So instead of 100 grams of muffins, you could eat 25! cucumbers to have the same amount of calorie intake. Good luck eating that! So again, no need to count calories forever, but I did it here and then to learn something about food.

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14 hours ago, Erik2.0 said:

, but it's hard when you don't count calories. I guess just eating smaller meals in general might have the desired effect. Doing two meals a day was too little food. Also most of that 6 lbs was muscle loss haha.

I don't think this is a good idea. Some things you can wing it, but only if you have a firm knowledge of the materials. If you don't know the calories in your items, how many calories you need per day, or to lose weight in the correct cutting method then you're going to wind up in circles. 

It's like trying to bake a cake without measuring out the ingredients, using the right temperature, and cooking and cooling it for the correct amount of time.

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@Alexanderle I see. I can try to eat more vegetables. I eat whole wheat bread still but pretty much no sugar. I’m trying to quit it and sub fruit. 
 

@BooksandTrees yeah it makes sense to count calories. I just don’t want to pay for my fitness pal and don’t like the ads. 
 

Day 139 NF 5 Np 93 Med 79

positive post : I ate no red meat, I drew and worked. Works okay. I’m kinda tired today from all the walking . We’re gonna try to do it earlier tomorrow.

Im grateful for my mom who works with me as best she can. Water which is my favorite drink and brown rice which is really filling. Spiders neighbors neighborhoods rural places places with less people walks and dogs.

I smiled at nature

I accomplished drawing something

God bless

Erik

 

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@Erik2.0 I would definitely recommend counting calories, especially in the beginning. When I first did it it was eye opening how many calories my portion contained. What I found most surprising was that how easy it is for all the calories to add up. And I agree with what @BooksandTrees and @Alexanderle said. There is no need to keep doing it constantly, but it is tremendously helpful in giving you an idea of how energy dense some foods are ... Once you know all the ingredients and temperature to cook the cake you need not look at the recipe. I was never too bothered by MyFitnessPal ads but I am sure there are other apps that would work well too. 

In terms of exercise, I think that having a balance of strengthening, steady-state, and HIIT cardio is best. And in all honesty, what you enjoy the most is usually the best. And one most important thing I would say is to make your workouts and diet consistent. There is time to do a more restrictive diet at times, but if you can stay consistent with healthier eating habits over the long run, it will pay off significantly more. 

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Day 140 NF 6 Np 94 Med 80

positive post: I’m alive, I’m well fed and I have a job.

today was heck. I went on a walk with my mom and she got us lost by forgetting her phone in the car. I’ve been upset every time I take a walk with her for the week. She’s always walking too long getting us lost saying something to upset me. It’s heck to deal with. Idk if I can handle taking walks with her I may stop altogether soon if things don’t improve. 
 

Im grateful we got back to the car, for turkey sandwiches, pasta, rice, heaven, god, therapy, groups, shoes and socks.

I smiled at a tree

I accomplished not swearing out loud today.

God bless

Erik

@Alexanderle @Marek thanks for advice guys. I’m working on eating healthier and cutting sugar entirely. 

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  • stablish changed the title to TheNewMe2.0's Journal - A Better Life

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