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dirac

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Another day -> failure ! gamed for 6 hours

Today was nice. I felt really good again, even went to the gym and had a great workout. I also went for a walk with my girlfriend for an hour in the sun it was really nice. Overall a great day so to speak.

But I also planned to do quite some stuff for uni which I wanted to do at home. But at the moment I cant work from home. Im just too hooked on gaming at the moment. Tomorrow I will start the no gaming again. The last week went so well for me. I felt good and was super productive and since I started gaming again it didnt go so well for me....

I mean I am enjoying it, I played because I wanted to play but It looks like its not working. Im becoming lazy and unproductive again.

So tomorrow no gaming !

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Day 1 -> success / Day 2 -> failure! gamed for about 6 hours

At the moment I am really struggling with gaming. But mostly because I dont really want to stop I just kinda want to stop. Im still able to do my uni stuff and go to sports but as soon as I am home I basically just dont leave the computer anymore. 

Im mostly struggling with finding alternatives to gaming. Other than netflix or youtube. Sport is not really and alternative because I am not doing it at home, I cant do it everyday and its also not very relaxing. So far I always tried to replace gaming with something productive but of course that cant work because then it doesnt fulfill my needs anymore. I mean there is a reason why I game at night and not read uni stuff.

Both days were pretty cool though.

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15 minutes ago, dirac said:

At the moment I am really struggling with gaming. But mostly because I dont really want to stop I just kinda want to stop. Im still able to do my uni stuff and go to sports but as soon as I am home I basically just dont leave the computer anymore. 

I invite you for a reflection:

When I decided I would quit gaming it wasn't because games were "ruining" my life. I was able to do university stuff. I was able to go to the gym (even though I skipped it many times because of gaming). I had friends that I hung out with. For sure, games were a bad way to deal with other problems in my life, but looking at my life at the time someone could say that it was "on track".

But the thing is: looking a little deeper, I can see now dozens of harms that gaming too much brought into my life. I'm not a very social person. In fact, I have a lot of self esteem problems when it comes to socializing. It screwed up my posture. I stopped reading, which is a thing I love to do. Learning how to headshot a pixel in a screen as fast as possible didn't give me any skill that I'm proud of. More than that, the time invested in gaming didn't allow me to learn some things that I wanted to learn, like playing the guitar. And the list goes on and on.

But the bigger thing I realized was that I didn't want to spend any more time of my life doing the same meaninless thing over and over again. Looking back at my steam account and seeing that I spent almost an entire year of my life playing one game makes me sick (I am 26, so one year is 3,85% of my ENTIRE LIFE). What is even worse: you don't even remember this time that you spent gaming. For me that's the biggest motivation I have for staying away from games, I want to do new stuff, have different experiences.

That's just a reflection, good luck @dirac!

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Day 1 -> success!

@WhatAboutToday?

Thanks for your reply, it actually really helped me to not game today. I read it last night in bed and it got me thinking. I also realised that even if I am just watching netflix instead of gaming in the beginning it is still better than gaming. I will try my best from now on to stay away from gaming even if I still just waste my time completely.

Yesterday I played for 6 hours without barely moving around or getting up from the chair and very poor posture. Today I had neckpain basically the entire day. Stuff like this is the reason why gaming is such a bad thing because it really destroys you on multiple fronts. I socialise less, my health is in poor condition , my uni career is not nearly going as good as it could, I often skipped going to the gym because of it, it makes me feel bad emotionally.... the list goes on and on.

Today was a great day because I didnt game. I am very happy that I managed to stay off of it.

I will take this no gaming serious as fuck now!

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4 hours ago, dirac said:

Thanks for your reply, it actually really helped me to not game today. I read it last night in bed and it got me thinking.

That literally put a smile in my face. Glad to hear that!

Good luck in this journey!

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@WhatAboutToday? thank you ! If you are interested in how it goes you can come again some time 🙂

Day 2 -> success!

Today was really great. It was sunday which is my uni free day. I spent the entire day with my girlfriend, we had a really nice breakfast and then we went to the gym together. After that we had lunch/dinner, talked for a while and then watched a movie.

Nothing special happened but it was really wholesome. Having a day like this once a week is so good!

Oh and by the way I didnt talk about sugar anymore in my last posts. So the intense sugar craving went away after about 7-10 days. By now I dont have any "need" for sweet stuff anymore. Sometimes after a meal I wouldnt mind a dessert but the cravings are completely gone. I feel pretty good healthwise so far and the neck pain is also gone.

A couple of days ago I bought like a huge calendar that displays the entire year at once with a little space for every day. I started writing down certain things on that calender like how I felt on a scale from 1-10, how productive I was, if I did sport and my no gaming streak. So far I feel like this was a great idea. For instance I often feel like I remember how I felt much worse than it actually was and being able to look at the week/day and see the number I gave it really helps. I also feel much better to be honest when I rate how I feel on a scale from 1-10 because sometimes I whine a lot about how I feel but when I have to put it on a scale from 1-10 I realise that I am basically at a 6-7 which is pretty solid I think.

And its also nice to see how much sport I have done so far this year, this might sometimes give me the push I need!

This week I really want to make sure I stay game free. I also want to do sport 4 times and want to be really productive for uni. But I think forcing myself to study for a certain amount of time everyday ends up being more stressful than motivating so I will focus more on actually achieving stuff!

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Day 3 -> success!

Today was really good. I went to uni , went to my lectures was productive for more than hour before them so I did uni stuff for 6 hours today which is pretty solid. Then I went to the gym and had a really amazing workout. I actually enjoy working out more and more. I cant wait to work out again on wednesday!

Today I also had an interesting realisation. I believe one of the reasons why I havent been as motivated and energetic and happy this semester is because I am not very good at anything. Because of my back problems I havent been to my martial arts club in a while and that is something that always makes me feel really good about myself. Because I love doing it and I am good at it. Being good at stuff makes you feel confident also in other situations. One more thing I am really good at is theoretical physics. Which is also something I dont have this semester. Iam stuck with my last two courses of the bachelor and they are both computer science. They are interesting and I enjoy them but I am just not very good at them ( so far ). So all the things that gave me confidence, that I was really good at last semester are gone. And I believe this is one reason for why I just dont feel as awesome and motivated this semester.

My idea how to tackle this is the following:

I will put more work into my two computer science courses atleast for the last 3 weeks of the semester and then to prepare for the exam. So I will become good at that!

I will also from now on make sure that I always attend one course per semester that I know I will enjoy and be good at.

And I will continue to go to the gym and do my bodyweight training because I am starting to get good at that too.

And if I am lucky I might be able to do martial arts again quite soon!

The no gaming is quite difficult for me at the moment. I am just struggling to find stuff to do in the evening. I feel like reading is too much work, netflix is kind of boring and youtube is pretty much the same as mindless browsing to me right now. But I will stay strong!

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Day 4 -> failure ! Gamed for 3 hours

So today I failed. I slept really bad last night, woke up like 10 times. I was really done and tired the whole day, and when I went to uni to study with a friend we were both super unmotivated and I just couldnt concentrate very well because I was so tired. So I just went home after lunch and played games. Then my girlfriend came by and the rest of the day was really nice.

I do have to say it was still a pretty good day but I am starting to get a little pissed at myself because of how unproductive I have been this semester.

Still motivated for the no game though, gonna get right back at it

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Day 1 , Day 2 , Day 3 -> success !

I didnt manage to post because I was super busy and also wasnt home on thursday. 

But its going really well. I managed to stay game free for 3 days now, mostly because there wasnt really anytime to game.

I feel like I am also getting better in terms of my motivation for uni and my gaming cravings. On wednesday I actually gamed quite a bit but I did more uni stuff than I actually wanted to which I see as a huge win.

I actually called my dad who lives in a city close to mine and we made a deal that he will take my computer next saturday and not bring it back until the exams are over. This will be the ultimate opportunity for me to stay game free. Until then I will see if I game or not, but then stuff is getting serious.

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Day 4 -> failure ! gamed for 3 hours

So today was sunday which is my non uni day that I usually spend with my girlfriend. It was a nice day but my girlfriend was gone for about 3 hours today which I used to game.

The gaming experience itself was really bad. First I wanted to play some warcraft 3 custom games but people kept leaving in every game which just made me furious after a while. Then I decided to play a round of dota 2 which usually doesnt have leavers because you get punished for it. But half of my team were complete assholes. They just complained and threw out report threats and stuff. Today showed me again why the online game community is considered so horrible. There are just so many horrible people among online gamers. 

I feel like in online games you get away with a lot of stuff that would never happen in reality. 

Later I went to the gym and had a really nice workout. 

One or two days ago I kind of had a big realisation. For this entire semester I struggled with motivation for uni which was so strange because I am usually super motivated and excited about it. But then I realised that this semester I only have computer science courses. No physics at all because I only need to do those 2 computer science courses to finish my bachelor. And to be honest computer science is kind of cool but I just dont enjoy it nearly as much as phyics. So I realised its not that surprising that I am not super motivated because I just dont enjoy what I am doing right now as much as I used to.

But well I have to finish those two courses and then in the masters I will have a lot of physics again. I cant even wait for that to happen.

On the first of february I will start studying for my computer science exams. My computer will be gone by then and I will study as hard as possible to make sure I am done with computer science and can finally do physics again!

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