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Everything posted by dirac

  1. Today was good. I was productive and had a nice long run. It was the first time I did 2 runs in 3 days. Because I usually do other workouts instead, but it was definitely nice. I am starting to enjoy running quite a bit. Tomorrow is the last day of uni before I am visiting my friend, so I will have to do as much work as I can tomorrow, to make up for the weekend. I feel like I am coming again short on my job as a research assistant. Even though I learned so much at this job and I am very grateful for it, it makes me feel like shit most of the time because I feel like I am constantly underperfo
  2. Today was already much better. I wasnt super productive but atleast I was quite a bit productive. I also had a really nice hard workout which felt really good. I feel like I am on the right track right now. I just have to make sure I get some work done tomorrow otherwise it will get a bit tight with the long weekend. Im really looking forward to the weekend though, also because some restaurants already reopened where my friend lives. And of course I can see my friend too haha. Good thing I handed in my conference proceeding so this chapter is basically over. However, the professor said i
  3. Today was a pretty interesting day. I basically just watched netflix and gamed all day even though I wanted to be productive. I think its because of how I have my mind made up. Because I will visit a friend on the coming weekend from friday to monday (public holiday). So its basically a mini vacation. And this week I still have to do something for the seminar where I did my presentation. So I kind of feel like that after this week the semester "gets serious" because Im done with the seminar that took so much time and effort and I also had a mini vacation. So I feel like I am kind of allowed to
  4. Today was moderate I would say. I had quite a bit of headache in the morning which made it a little hard to get out of bed and get going. I managed to have a more or less productive morning and was able to advance a bit in my reasearch assistant job. I also worked on an exercise sheet with a friend which was nice as well. But I really wasnt motivated today and I struggled especially with the exercise sheet. The rest of the day I spend mostly gaming and watching netflix because I just didnt really feel good and I did the most important things I wanted to do. Feels kind of like I wasted half the
  5. Today was pretty amazing. I was very productive and managed to finish something that I feared might take me till monday. This makes the rest of the week way more chill and I might actually be able to do everything I want to. Tomorrow is a national holiday so I dont have lectures but I can finally catch up and do some work for my job as a research assistant. I will also go for a run tomorrow. Today I trained with the guy I find so hard to deal with but this time it was really nice, I feel like its also connected to how I interact with him, when I am nicer and a little more open he also see
  6. Today was also a pretty good day! I was quite productive but felt a little bit overwhelmed with everything I still have to do this week. I guess I will just keep pushing and do one thing after the other. I think I will be able to do everything especially because thursday is a national holiday so I wont have any lectures which gives me some extra time. I recently have been thinking about one of my training partners in grappling. Hes the one who can teach me by far the most at my gym but I just find it so difficult to interact with him. I find him to be quite unpleasant as a person so I am co
  7. Today was really great. I was super productive and didnt waste any time. I am really happy with myself. I worked out and did a lot for uni. I will do my best to continue strong tomorrow 🙂 I dont really have much to say mostly because of how good it went.
  8. Today was really nice. It was my uni free day and I was able to do some things here and there and mostly rest and recover. I took a nice walk with my girlfriend, in the evening we also watched a movie together. I also got a nice workout in and did some exercises for my lower back so the pain will stay away. I am really proud that I didnt game. I actually downloaded a game again because I didnt really know what else to do but I didnt even play because I realised I dont even want to game. Its definitely not easy but I will do my best to stay strong. I feel like this weekend really al
  9. Today was really great I have to say. It was by far the best day this week. I was really productive the entire day and felt really good about it. I also went on a long run (for me atleast) and pushed myself more than usual. I also read something related to university in the evening which is also really cool. At the moment I am searching for something kind of entertaining to watch while eating but its difficult. Because a real tv show is first of all a waste of time and second if it is any good I will want to watch more which is bad. I wish there was something that would be entertaining bu
  10. @PochatokHey , thank you for the comment! No I havent heard of that but it sounds interesting I will look into it! Yeah a routine makes sense, I am a big believer in good planning and starting early with tasks so stress is minimized in the first place but of course this does not always work. I think finding activities that satisfy the needs that gaming provides is quite hard, especially because gaming is so available and easy to do. But I think I am on to some things 🙂
  11. So today went pretty shitty I have to say. I was productive in the morning for about 3 hours but then I basically just gave up because I felt kind of bad again. I spend the rest of my day playing dota and watching netflix. However I am very determined to stop gaming now. I even downloaded the respawn guide again and printed it. I will read a bit of it now and I will conitnue reading it on the next days. I dont think I will ever be able to develope something like a reading habit while I still game. Because I will always choose gaming over reading - if I have to choice. I already uninstalled all
  12. I usually dont post during the day but I have some things on my mind right now that I wanted to bring to paper and I thougt it might be a good idea to do it here. So lately I have been declining quite a bit again. Even though my presentation went really well, everything else really didnt. I feel like I have to step up and become more physically and mentally healthy again. I have been quite stressed lately and I basically stopped working out because of my lower back pain but its not gonna go away by itself and if I dont start exercising a lot and regularly again I will soon start to spiral
  13. Today was a little awful I have to say. I woke up with back pain that persisted the entire day. I also felt kind of bad in general because I slept really horrible. I was in kind of an unproductive mood for the majority of the day and because of that I took the easy way out and just said it would be okay to play video games for the rest of the day. Which I did. I did kind of enjoy it but I mostly did it so I didnt have to deal with my physical and emotional unwellness. I hope I will feel good again tomorrow, I really miss working out because ever since my backpain came back last week I basical
  14. Today was pretty cool. I did one more test presentation in the morning and noticed that I was still a couple of minutes over the time limit so I made some adjustments. The actual presentation in the afternoon went really well and I was very happy about it. I can safely say that this was the best presentation I ever gave and I am really proud of it. I was very happy afterwards. Other than that I wasnt really productive in anyway today because I couldnt focus on anything but that presentation. It really did stress me out. Well but now its done and I am very happy about that. After the prese
  15. Today was nice, I worked a lot on my presentation. I gave it once to myself and one more time to my girlfriend. I was about 7 minutes over the time limit which is bad, so I kicked out some slides. I will have to do another test presentation tomorrow morning to see if I can reach the 35 minute mark now. It kind of sucks because I felt really good about my presentation and now it feels like its not as smooth as before, lets just hope I can make it tomorrow morning in time, otherwise I will be stressed to death during the real presentation which is tomorrow at noon. But either way, I will g
  16. Today was really nice. I worked on my presentation for about 2-3 hours and finished it. I will send it to my professor first thing in the morning. After that I was able to wind down a bit. Took a nice long walk with my girlfriend, played a videogame for about 90 minutes with my best friend which was nice as well. We also talked a lot and hes actually planning to have children next year. He just finished his master and his girlfriend will finish her Phd next year and after that they want to have children. I am super excited and happy for them. Me and my girlfriend also really want children but
  17. Today was really nice. I was quite productive but also managed to relax a little and went on a run. I really struggled with working out during the past week because I really didnt feel like it. The run today was pretty amazing though, I am really glad I went. I also worked a little more on my presentation and might actually be able to finish it tomorrow. This is great because the professor offered me to go over my slides once again on monday which would be really helpful. This will mean that I wont have my uni free sunday but I think under those circumstances thats just not worth it. But I alr
  18. Today was a nice day. I was quite productive and felt much better than yesterday, physically and mentally. I had the test presentation with my professor and he gave me lots of valuable feedback. I am quite confident that I can give a good presentation on tuesday once I have implemented the suggestions and feedback. Today I had some interesting thougts atleast they were interesting to me. I thougt about motivation and mindset and realized that in quite a few areas of my life I have no motivation for being good at them. For example my job as a research assistant. I feel like I have been und
  19. Today was a bit awful actually. I felt quite bad physically and also didnt feel good mentally. I think its the stress related to the presentation or something, but I really didnt feel good today. I couldnt at all concentrate in my afternoon lecture and I felt too bad to exercise. But I did pretty good for that. Worked a lot anyways. Lets hope I will feel better tomorrow
  20. Today was pretty good, I was quite productive even though I didnt feel good today. I still made the best of it though. Not really much to say. Lets hope some sleeps will make me feel better tomorrow
  21. Today was a pretty solid day, I was quite productive but had quite some lower back pain. I think its from sitting too much with horrible posture. I managed to do a small workout for my lower back and butt muscles, that usually helps. I also ordered an orthopedic pillow from amazon because its been several times that I experienced this backpain. Hopefully this helps a little in addition to workouts and stretching. Tomorrow I will make sure to be productive as well. I will work a lot on my presentation so I can finish it up till tomorrow night because I want to give my girlfriend a test pr
  22. @technica Hey, so its always planned that I am watching a movie with my girlfriend, but apart from that I dont really plan for sunday. The sunday is really just for doing what I feel like, even if its just gaming. I think it would lose its purpose if I would spend it on something even remotely productive, so hanging out with friends or a long walk are also nice options, maybe even a small trip once the lockdown is over. But I am still experimenting around with it a little 😛
  23. Today was a good day. I was very productive and did everything I wanted to. I even read a bit in the evening which was on my to do list. Im happy to see that having the uni free sunday turned out to be a good idea, I felt very fresh and rested today, like the stress from last week was well taken care of. Im also kind of excited about uni again, or atleast I view it more as something I get to do instead of a stress factor. Also had a nice workout today. Lets continue down this path and be productive every day so I can enjoy my free sunday without feeling guilty 🙂
  24. It looks like I am starting to get inconsistent with the posting, yesterday I went to bed late and I just forgot to post again. Yesterday was a pretty good day, quite productive and also had some fun doing other things. Today I had my uni free day and it was kind of amazing, I played games most of the day and also met some friends outside and sat by a river for some hours. In the evening my girlfriend and I watched a movie together. I was really able to wind down today. Now I feel like I can actually deal with a week of university again. I think this uni free day might save me from all this st
  25. The zoom call yesterday got a little bit late and I forgot to make a post. Yesterday was quite alright I guess and today was too. However I feel like exactly what I feared is happening. I am basically becoming less and less motivated everyday and I dont really know what to do about it. Its honestly a bit depressing that I can see myself going through the same cycles of excitement and demotivation again and again. I feel like I am never learning or improving in the long run. Its only short bursts of enthusiasm that quickly decline. However I do have to say that I am still doing pretty wel