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  1. Playing seems to be a plaster distraction from other problems you have. If these let you feel the way you described I would also just play and maybe trying to see a psychiatrist first before you detox agsin. Feel free to post how your doing anyway. I personally would find it interesting and I seen in the past people get better here with similar problems. Best of luck to you 🤞
  2. Hi @alvayuso, sounds you got things in control right now. On interesting thing I learned recently is that every perceived "negative" emotion has its on use. I.e. Anger -> Releases energy to change things, sadness -> helps to accept unchangeable things, fear -> helps you to get away from danger. The key is not to suppress them or run away from them (as I tend to do) but to realize your feeling them, feel them, and then just move on. Later on you can reflect if it was the right emotion for the job. These motions are only problematic if they are extreme or misguided. If you are angr
  3. @alvayuso Regarding your friend: Evading to talk to him if you have this kind of relationship is a workable but not really satisfying solution. The first thing which popped to my mind as I read your description was: Tell him! Just talk with him about how you feel (while focusing on me messages). I. I feel like you are wounded if I am giving you advice and our roles kind of changed? Is this true? I really appreciate what you've done for me over the years so I would really hate it if our relationships would suffer only because I climb out of the shithole I came from. Or something else in th
  4. Hey @alvayuso, I missed our discussions a little bit (guess the responses of a real person give me a nice little boost). While I can empathise that if the novelty of a thing wears off after a few weeks it is exactly then when you should keep posting (even if it is only a few sentences) to keep the habit alive and keep yourself in check. From my experience as soon as I stopped posting, because I didn't feel like it things slip away. Even if these retrospectives feel a little repetetive or boring they are worth it (especially while you still newer to not gaming). But welp. I am really no go
  5. Hello dear reader, I haven't posted here for a while. What happened in the last 2 weeks: I did successfully stop watching YouTube and also blocked LinkedIn\feed on my laptop and LinkedIn as a whole on my phone. Did get some more housework done Connected with friends on family over remote Didn't do Pomodoro sessions Did only two (really promising) applications but got for both an invitiation for a remote screening. So MAYBE I am min-maxing? Gone through some emotional stuff with my wife and was able to support her. Gone through 70% of "Moonwalki
  6. @alvayuso Glad you get some value out of my book recommondation. Yeah I wasn't to convinced on the premise of the book at start too (especially because I read another Habit book some years ago and couldn't take too much out of it). But I really like how he makes the stuff applicable and straight forward. Cold is maybe a bit to negative (implies of not beeing able to show positive emotions either). How do you like controlled/stoic? Priorization is a good point. I will focus on two habits. Focus (atleast 1 Pomodorro session at knowledge work tasks) and Memorization (Memorizing Na
  7. Hey @alvayuso Thanks for asking. Right now I am "in between" jobs so I have more time and trying to end in a better state of myself after this period. That's why I blocked all feed media and youtube and trying to have less input in general and focus more on my relationships and good habits. The relationships part is working fine, the part with the good habits not so much. Havin two small kids is making time based routines hard and I am not very good in finding flexible "triggers" for habits or prioritizing myself over my family. So most of the time I am reacting and in the evening when bo
  8. Hey @alvayuso, I just read an interesting long-form article / essay which let me think of you. https://longreads.com/2020/09/08/out-there-on-not-finishing/?utm_source=hackernewsletter&utm_medium=email&utm_term=longreads Btw. If you just edit your first postcover and over again its harder to follow up on you because we willalso have to remember what yourlast post was and the thread doesn't get pushed to the top. I don't mind but just some thi g you maybe didn't notice. The bebefit will be that the comments will be clearly separated from the diary, which is quite nice.
  9. @alvayuso About watching good/bad things. The main thing is that we need to try to separate our actions from our self-worth. Actions can be bad, and you shouldn't find excuses for your bad actions. Yourself should always feel worthy. Otherwise this becomes a self fulfilling prophecy. I.e.Bad action. -> I am bad -> im the kind of person who does bad things. This is a shitty circly for you mental health. With another evaluation of reality you don't have to fool yourself but still have a healthier response. This shit I have done is fucked up -> I realize that is fucked up because I
  10. @alvayuso Did you promise yourself not to game for the 90 days?If yes I think it is a relapse. If you promised not to play RL or any other online games or smth like this it isn't a relapse. What matters is taking yourself seriously. And not rationalizing yourself out of your promises. Otherwise you'll loose the most rewarding experience after the 90 days. The experience that you can promise your self a hard thing and stay true to this promise. If you actually committed to 90 days without games (whatever kind) then find another way to spend time with her (chat, watch stuff together, t
  11. @alvayuso My pleasure, I know how much these responses meant to me as I started to share here. It felt a little awkward at first, but real people caring helped a lot. About Peterson: I watched a few of his videos like 2 years ago and listened to his whole book. But he never really hit the mark for me. I guess its subjective. And I can relate to the missing father figure... About Games: I had some relapses in between but I think the max. time was a one or two weeks. My issue with games (or instant gratification in general) is that I use it to distract myself from negative feeling
  12. @alvayuso Hey welcome to the forum and the detox. One activity I started enjoying more after I stopped gaming was listening to audiobooks (I would recommend "Atomic Habits" to any one quitting gaming, Its short (~3hr, insightful, pragmatic and stays at the scientific side of popular "self-help" books). It seems like you are pretty competitive and the games gave you a way to fulfill the feeling of high status in comparison to your peers. That isn't something bad but you should keep this in mind, because gaming is imho a bad habit which is widely successful in fulfilling underlyi
  13. Hey there, quitting LOL was one of my best decisions in the past. Even gaming other stuff was better then the endless loop of queuing,muting my team, playing, porn, queuing again. I was also able to stop gaming afterwards with the forum which improved my life quality a lot. I wish you best of luck. It's worth it. In my experience the main part is to be consitent writing here. This helps to distract you and keep yourself accountable. What are your plans so far? Are you doing the detox?
  14. Hey @James Good, thanks for sharing your ideas here. One of my best friends is also living in Thailand as a digital nomad right now (he does freelance translating/texting stuff) and it seems like a good way of living for people who are tending a little more to the edges of the "normal" live experience. How are you monetizing your stuff? Just YouTube ads or do you have plans for books/paid newsletter/patreon or something similar? I am curious about that lifestyle which is so different from mine (I am really liking my "normal" life being employed, more or less well payed and having a s
  15. I spent only like 4 25minutes session on my job hunt because I needed to support my struggling wife and care for my two sons. And also because I am fucking tired. Well but on the good side, I good some recruiters asking for my availability and was able to finish on a good note on my old employer by saying everyone personal goodbye. I think most of them were positively surprised of that and I feel like a solid professional network is a good investment in my future. I am excited to look for software tester jobs (I worked so far under the title it-consultant and want to get away from project