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Dirac's Journal

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Hey guys,

I finally decided to write a journal here. I used to do it on a nofap forum. There I did it for like 70 days and then stopped because I felt like I dont need it anymore and I am proud to say I am at day 163 and its going great! 

So I thougt if it helped me this much on nofap, maybe it will help me with nogame aswell. 

I actually had been "clean" for about 2 weeks before I started to game again on monday. The week prior to that I was on vacation with my girlfriend and I felt so amazing on that vacation. I felt like I am actually alive again. I was interested in the world, in history, science and philosophy again. I just felt so good and read every evening. I didnt even watch netflix or youtube or anything. I felt calm, at peace, in love with the human existence.

But when I came home on monday after about 10 hours of traveling I thougt it would be justified to game because I was really tired and exhausted. Big mistake! I gamed for like 8 hours on monday then I gamed for another 10 hours on tuesday and already felt really bad and depressed again. Today it only got worse when I started the day with 3 hours of gaming. It only got worse when I stepped on a scale before my shower and I realised that I lost 4kg of muscle. This hit me really hard. I stopped working out regurlarly about 2 months ago and while gaming this much I also forgot to eat sometimes or just ate tiny snacks so I didnt meet my calorie requirements. Gaming just keeps on destroying parts of my life that I thougt I had under control.

So welcome to my daily journal. I will try to post every day, more for myself but I would love it if I could inspire others a little. I will talk mostly about how I felt everyday and what I did. Wether I was getting closer to my goals or just general stuff.

My goals right now are:

Train hard ! I will do the wolverine workout plan for the next 10 weaks and see where it gets me.

I also want to start reading again, and read for atleast 1 hour a day.

And I want to learn chinese for 20 minutes a day.

And I am sure there will be more that I will figure out on my way.

Kind regards


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So the worst day went horrible because I can start straight from day 0 again as I woke up with a cold and all my initial motivation went out the window. I still struggle quite a bit with replacing game time with meaningful other stuff, especially now during my holidays. My plan was to work out alot and hard but now I have to wait till I recovered from my cold. I am actually thinking about starting to workout anyways and just go a little light and see how it goes. I am always scared its gonna make my cold worse somehow but I never really tried so far.


Hey Adminiculum, thanks for the wishes. I am an udergrad physics student, sadly I dont have any advice on hardmode nofa, because during the whole time I was in a relationship and went easy mode so to speak. But so far I think nofap and no game go very well together partly because for me having bad games in league always drove me to porn to feel better somehow. For hardmode nofap it would probably make sense to quit gaming aswell or whatever drives you to fap in the first place.

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