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Octsober

Octsober Country - Let's do this

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Huh it's been a while. Maybe like... three months? Sounds about right. 

How's everyone been? 

So I'll just jump right into this. 
I started playing games after my 100 (110?) days away from video games. 
Slowly but surely I've ended back at square one. Go figure right? It's not that i'm surprised, I know this is on me which is OK. It's just I hate this feeling of distraction. 

Although things aren't overly that bad, some of the games I do play, outright upset me most of the time because I can feel it in my bones how much time I'm wasting. 
I've been still educating myself - I listen to a bunch of audio books. Some self-help stuff. Some casual stuff. I've spent a decent sum on self development within the past few months. I still meditate everyday for 20 minutes as well. Oh and my card game is officially finished. (woooo!) 

Now I'm trying to figure out how the hell to make my company website. I was in the process of doing this three months ago but... well the writing is on the walls. 

Today I came home. Looked at some of my games I have on my new PC (that I spent a fair about of money on..), scrolled around on Steam for a bit. Nothing..Fired up that Blizzard launcher. Nope, not feeling it. It's weird really. I was on the other side of the fence three months ago and saw that video games at this point in my life was truly wasting my time. Now I'm stuck back in the mud and the times when I get stuck gaming, My sleep schedule is pretty terrible. I don't eat badly but the times at which I eat aren't great. 

Now - at this point I'm aware of this, but I'm really unsure what to do here. Yeah I can quit again and do this whole process but there's something more that I feel is going on here. I want to find the root of this problem. It's funny really because I'm the type of person who tells my friends and family my problems. I was at a gathering not to long ago. A friend of mine mentioned to me that he liked the non-gaming version of me better. I tend to agree. 

I'm in a rather odd position. I'm technically a game designer. I make board / card games. It makes sense to me as a creative. Within my 10-20 year game plan I have video games as something I'd consider designing into, simply due to my experience playing them. Now I find this like an excuse to continue on this path.

I'm the type of person who, when really involved in something, puts lots of energy into whatever that may be. When I quit games I put most of that energy into my design and my company. The process of creating is exhausting so it balances out.    

Cam - I've still been keeping tabs on GQ. You reached out to me - I said I'm doing great. Eh - perhaps a bit of an exaggeration. Now don't get me wrong, I'm not BAD - i'm just distracted. I hate not feeling like I'm making progress like I was. I makes me feel like I'm going to be stuck at my serving job for the rest of my life and I cannot accept that. 

Still hanging in there but I've ventured back into the woods. Luckily this time I've got a small lantern with me. 

Hope you guys are doing well! 

-Oct. 

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Hi Oct!

I'm not going to judge, but are you still living at home? I've read your journal and the first thing that came to mind was this video here, spoken by a guy on a screen who's gone a bit hippie recently but he has some good ideas in him sometimes (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-kyhXttVakk). 

This was the first thing that came to mind - the idea that maybe there would be benefit in forcing yourself out of your comfort zone.

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Hi Oct!

I'm not going to judge, but are you still living at home? I've read your journal and the first thing that came to mind was this video here, spoken by a guy on a screen who's gone a bit hippie recently but he has some good ideas in him sometimes (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-kyhXttVakk). 

This was the first thing that came to mind - the idea that maybe there would be benefit in forcing yourself out of your comfort zone.

Hey Jeremias! 

Thanks for getting back to me! 

To answer your question. I totally still live at home. I watched the video you posted. I feel there's some good information here, but I see some extremes too. I know that change is a process, but at the same time motivations are also important. What I do know is that positive motivations are what ultimately matter in the long run. Sure I can live out of my car and figure things out from there, but there will be some point even after finding my way out and on my own when playing games, as an example, could reenter my life and i'd be back to square one again. 

I think I've been getting better at finding good reasons not to play games. It's that there's many bad reasons why I'd rather not play, but ultimately what sticks are the positive reasons in doing so.  

I'm by all means not saying you're wrong, or that your support is not and was not helpful. But this is how I'm seeing it from my end more or less. 

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One exercise you can try that has worked really well for some others is to take note each day of 3 things that are working in your life. So what are you doing each day that is helping you feel and be your best. Then you can do more of that. So if not gaming was one of them, you can get back on track.

Just because things aren't "bad" doesn't mean you should settle for that either. You deserve GREAT.

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One exercise you can try that has worked really well for some others is to take note each day of 3 things that are working in your life. So what are you doing each day that is helping you feel and be your best. Then you can do more of that. So if not gaming was one of them, you can get back on track.

Just because things aren't "bad" doesn't mean you should settle for that either. You deserve GREAT.

Hey Cam, 

Never really thought about it like that... I've been thinking about three things that are working. I've been considering writing again but I feel there's this disconnect with it. I enjoy storytelling but not necessarily by writing. I'm going to have to take some time with it again... 

I've been going to the gym again so there's that. I enjoy the process of getting back into shape. 

It's just I know that I feel like complete trash playing that new shooter Overwatch. I feel like I'm better than this when I play it. But because of all the social implications of it, it's hard to get away from it if people I know are playing. I'm sure you have experience with this.

  

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One exercise you can try that has worked really well for some others is to take note each day of 3 things that are working in your life. So what are you doing each day that is helping you feel and be your best. Then you can do more of that. So if not gaming was one of them, you can get back on track.

Just because things aren't "bad" doesn't mean you should settle for that either. You deserve GREAT.

Hey Cam, 

Never really thought about it like that... I've been thinking about three things that are working. I've been considering writing again but I feel there's this disconnect with it. I enjoy storytelling but not necessarily by writing. I'm going to have to take some time with it again... 

I've been going to the gym again so there's that. I enjoy the process of getting back into shape. 

It's just I know that I feel like complete trash playing that new shooter Overwatch. I feel like I'm better than this when I play it. But because of all the social implications of it, it's hard to get away from it if people I know are playing. I'm sure you have experience with this. 

Yes, for sure. I know that @kortheo had some experience with that when he first quit. 

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The intensity you bring to your projects in game design is a strength and can help you on your journey.  It seems like your searching for a new direction or perhaps to confirm if your direction still fits.  It is ok to change mid stream in life as you grow and discover what works better or does not work.  It is hard to change but when I acknowledge where I was headed did not work anymore and I let it go, I have not regretted it.  Hang on and you got this.

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The intensity you bring to your projects in game design is a strength and can help you on your journey.  It seems like your searching for a new direction or perhaps to confirm if your direction still fits.  It is ok to change mid stream in life as you grow and discover what works better or does not work.  It is hard to change but when I acknowledge where I was headed did not work anymore and I let it go, I have not regretted it.  Hang on and you got this.

I felt like things made more sense when my focus was primarily on my company. This was back when I played no games. Now I find myself looking on steam for something to play here and there, it's frustrating. It's like I want to stop again as well but I've spent all this money on my new PC, I need to get my money's worth out of it. These's are excuses, I know, but I feel like I'm hiding from something... I've come closer to understanding the things that make me feel fulfilled, but I'm having a hard time bring back my focus to the right direction. 

It's even more frustrating because most of the games I do play just make me upset and feel like a complete waste of time. 

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Greetings again gang. 

Still around and kicking. 

Yesterday I liquidated some of the games I've had around. A bunch of systems, games, etc. Always had em, even when I orginally quit for 110 days.
Going to take that cash and toss most of it into self improvemnt reading or my business.

Feels good to be less distracted!    

Hope you guys are doing well. 

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Hey gang, 

Going t hough a bit of a rough patch. Looking for some guidance on how to get back on track / less distracted. 

I've been meaning to start weaning my self again and so far it's been working, but I still have my computer, which I'd say for me is the gateway to more of the potent games that grabs me for whatever reason. 

So - I've you've been where I am now, please share your wisdom! 

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Whenever I get a bit off track I re-focus on the basics. Also, I think about what my main purpose is in my life at the time, what my goals are I'm working towards. Usually one or the other is off. Either I'm not focusing on the habits in my life that make up my foundation or I have no goals.

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Pretty much what cam said :D Check your sleep/eating/workout and get a Project you are invested into. The main reason we game is that we don't have anything more awesome to do. I started a little project right now and it helps me a lot to avoid  distractions because I am commited to it.

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Hey guys, thanks for your responses. 

As of yesterday I've removed all games from the menu. I've been refocusing on my business (as I've been kinda neglecting) and been getting back into some creative projects I've been meaning to finish. I agree that (and I'm aware) the habits that I currently have aren't really making me feel better but have bene wearing me down and all and all doesn't feel like the correct path. 

Things just made more sense when I wasn't playing. It's funny really because I have a friend who said I was a Real Person when I didn't play games and was happy to hear I was going on hiatus agian. Months ago I recall he asked me that if I was the best in whatever game I was playing how would you feel and I said simply nothing. 

Getting back to the basics is also what I belive to be the correct path. 

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Things just made more sense when I wasn't playing. It's funny really because I have a friend who said I was a Real Person when I didn't play games and was happy to hear I was going on hiatus agian.

Important feedback.

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Things just made more sense when I wasn't playing. It's funny really because I have a friend who said I was a Real Person when I didn't play games and was happy to hear I was going on hiatus agian.

Important feedback.

Its interesting really. I feel like it's harder to quit after quitting for a long period of time. Not that it's true, but it feels like I forgot what it was like when I wasn't playing. It's weird. When I did stop it's like I saw what playing was really doing to me and had this strong sense of I'm over it in regards to playing in the future. 

As so wisdom that I can share to those that have quit and are thinking about if they can return. I thought the same. I figured that I knew I could stop so I could probably play again but the way playing games works for me is like a slow poision. Eventually I ended right back where I've started and didn't fully understand what happened. I do however have some insights into stopping again, and it feels easier to stop playing because of the things I've learned and felt while I wasn't. 

Just some food for thought. I'll be 10 days come this friday. 

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I agree with you saying that games are slow poison. They kill our lives if we are under influence of it for too long. Besides that, what you've wrote is equal to what I say about gaming in moderation. It leads to relapse. There are so few examples of it working, in comparison to so many where it doesn't, that this should be widely discouraged in my opinion. 

Now go for it! 

Edited by Piotr

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Hey gang, 

currently 26 days in. Feeling better as each da y continunes on. 

As my interest in being in the company of others has changed, I find it quite annoying that people will play games and completely shun out. But I guess this is the part Cam dicussed in regards to friends who game and those priorties having differences. 

Day 30 for me in 4 days! 

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Hey guys, 

Quitting this time around has been interesting. I'm back to day one. I was a day away from 30 but I had hit rock bottom.
I couldn't take any more stress and just needed to reach out to people online.
What had happened was that this month has been pretty slow for me at work so my general cash flow has been slow making this Stresser one. 
Stresser two: My 'core' group of friends has been not necessarily toxic, but negative in regards when I've been trying to reach out to socialize. They've recently been playing more video games as well. Moslty family members and close. old friends.
Stresser three: I'm launching a kickstarter this month and it feels like I haven't done as much work as I have been for it.

All this came crashing down on my a week / week and a half ago where I just logged in to 'hang' out with people I knew.

Now I don't wish to keep playing games, but when I do I try my best to distance myself from them as best as I can. I understand that I've used Video games in the past to unwind and destress in the past, but that's no longer acceptable. I will give myself this one as, to be honest I was at a pretty low point with all these factors looming.

On a possitive note I'm actually looking forward to what the future may hold for once!

Guess I'll have to wait and see.

Be well guys!

-Oct 

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I have relapsed multiple times when first quitting gaming. Every time we relapse we get an opportunity to do better next time. Don't be too harsh on yourself. Simply learn from it and move on. 

You are doing a great job! Maybe next time instead of reaching out to friends in the gaming cycle you could reach out to this community or to youtube videos where people tell why they quit gaming like the one from Cam or SUCCESS INSIDER for example.

Much love from the Netherlands - Robin <3

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I have relapsed multiple times when first quitting gaming. Every time we relapse we get an opportunity to do better next time. Don't be too harsh on yourself. Simply learn from it and move on. 

You are doing a great job! Maybe next time instead of reaching out to friends in the gaming cycle you could reach out to this community or to youtube videos where people tell why they quit gaming like the one from Cam or SUCCESS INSIDER for example.

Much love from the Netherlands - Robin <3

I've quit before for 110 days so it's a little  werid for me this time. I agree that I should ease up a bit though. 

I didn't think to come here instead of my core  group. Next time I should start here and go from there instead!

Thanks for your support guys !

 

 

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Hey guys, 

I just wanted to share something I thought may help some of you that are currently trying to stop playing video games. 

It's a little ironic, but for me, I'm a game designer. I don't make video games but board games / card games rather. It's by far a great medium for playing games than video games because there's a point when you physically cannot play for long periods of time. 

Anyhow. I'm currently running a kickstarter for my current project. It's a storytelling party game anyone one can pick up and play. I don't want this to seem like I'm selling it here and just promoting my Kickstarter, but rather showing the things you can do when we are not so distracted by video games. 

I made this in part while I was 110 days free of gaming. Check it out and let me know your thoughts! 

--> Everything Makes Sense at the End. <--

Be well! 

-Oct.

Edited by Octsober

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