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Mettermrck

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About Mettermrck

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  1. Hi Ben, I can relate to your story. I'm 43 and made the mistake of buying a gaming laptop recently, an Acer too! The thrill of playing a single player RPG (like Deus Ex or Mass Effect) with great graphics is overpowering. With my headphones on it's like a Star Trek holodeck. Even limiting myself with a timer felt more like trying to bottle nuclear energy. And when I stopped, I itched to get back as soon as possible. I'm glad you're here. I've played games since the days of Atari and Texas Instruments.
  2. Day 0/367 Well, I'm back....defeated but not giving up. The past year or more has been agony for me. My divorce was finalized early in 2018. I lost a full time job in June due to absenteeism. I was out of work for 5 months, barely scraping by on my Mom's limited income. Somehow I managed, with the help of my state's vocational rehabilitation program, to get another good full-time job. And I lost that in 5 weeks...due to absenteeism. So I'm back on the scraping limited income. I was already struggling when my 90 day detox completed in Sept 2017. I was already slackening in my diet. Wh
  3. Ahh, Moe, you wrote this post for me, I swear, and broke me out of my embarassed lurking shell. I too tanked right after my 90 day detox, thinking I could handle the gaming in moderation, patting myself on the back, hyping myself up with pep talks with friends who gamed without problems. I'd say within a week all of my positive habits were gone. And yet, like you, I had this fundamental belief that I could make gaming a healthy part of my life in moderation. After all, hadn't I just proved it by successfully going 90 days without it and demonstrating my control? But day after day I wa
  4. Day 90/90. Well this is it! It's not the super triumphant parade I envisioned when I first started this but I think that's because I'm not stopping to rest on my laurels. I'm moving on with my life and I have more goals to conquer. My journey has only just begun. @giblets, I also journal at home with a private diary so sometimes it feels like overlap with writing (or typing) the same things twice. As I've mentioned, I will probably keep this forum journal as a weekly journal, to give me more days to organize thoughts, etc. rather than everyday events. But I'll stay on the forums each day as be
  5. Wow those are some impressive physical achievements!
  6. I think your journaling idea sounds great and is about what I'm planning myself. I look forward to hearing how you're doing going forward. Nice way to finish the race haha...whatever works! ?
  7. Sounds good...we're behind you! ?
  8. Day 89/90 I wanted to complete this early before church as I probably won't have time later. @Zala, my next step right now is just continued weight loss and maintaining my momentum. I've probably not written enough about it, but this weight loss journey has been exhausting and traumatic even as it has been triumphant and fantastic. I don't regret it for a second but it is very mentally draining to put all of my focus into the simple step of not eating fast food and making sure I go to the gym. It feels like I am on constant guard on a giant wall, keeping the addictions from getting in. That j
  9. 30 days! You're getting there!
  10. You have a great attitude, skaliq! Yes, prove to yourself that you are strong enough to do the 90 days and then worry about the rest.
  11. I agree about low intensity. I enjoy taking a slower walk outside and just relaxing rather than pushing myself. It's more soothing. I still go all out on the treadmill though. ?
  12. Day 88/90. Almost there...feel like I'm doing the last two shoulder dumbbells...gruuunnnnt. ? @Hitaru, I actually use the Quitzilla app which keeps a running money saving tally for your addictions and how long you've been sober. Gaming is smaller, about $10-15 every two weeks. So it's about $60 now conservatively. Fast food/soda is the killer. I've regularly spent $7-10/day on it! No joke. So yes, $600-$900 saved in 90 days. That is NOT a lie and why I've always considered gaming to be the junior addiction. A quiet beginning to a quiet weekend. I still need to work on socialization as Saturday
  13. You've made a great start on your journey by beginning your journal!