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Octsober Country - Let's do this

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It's a little ironic, but for me, I'm a game designer. I don't make video games but board games / card games rather. It's by far a great medium for playing games than video games because there's a point when you physically cannot play for long periods of time. 

Anyhow. I'm currently running a kickstarter for my current project. It's a storytelling party game anyone one can pick up and play. I don't want this to seem like I'm selling it here and just promoting my Kickstarter, but rather showing the things you can do when we are not so distracted by video games. 

Don't worry, I was trying to make a board game with my friend too! It's an awesome idea - board games are social but in normal way, not in virtual like video games.

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Hey guys, 

I'm checking back in to say that I'm stuck. 
I can't stop playing Overwatch. I've been playing it competitively and I know it's a waste of time but I can't get out of the loop. 
What do I do here? 

I feel after the failure of my kickstarter, I really need to get my head out of the ground. I am far more productive when I don't play games. 

I'm all ??? for what to do currently. 

Best, 

Oct

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+1 to what Cam wrote above. You need to muster some willpower and determination, and delete that shit. Then decide for yourself that you won't install it again, or watch any overwatch videos or anything. Get completely game free. Then ofc come here and write about your struggles. We've got your back!

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I really need to quit. Like really. There's absolutely zero good I'm getting in my life right now because of games. It's a constricting feeling. I felt way more at ease and free when I wasn't playing. I mean, I substituted games for Board Games but it doesn't do the same thing that Video games do to me. I'm having a really really hard time getting away from it this time around, I guess because I have a game that I'm playing more so than usual, opposed when I quit last year and didn't have anything.

I need to just quit again.   

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For myself, I have to not look at the forums, the inbrowser chat, the website, the youtube videos or it will take a little time (half an hour ha, ha) but I will be back in the game.  

It's really hard sometimes but I just can't play.

 

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I really need to quit. Like really. There's absolutely zero good I'm getting in my life right now because of games. It's a constricting feeling. I felt way more at ease and free when I wasn't playing. I mean, I substituted games for Board Games but it doesn't do the same thing that Video games do to me. I'm having a really really hard time getting away from it this time around, I guess because I have a game that I'm playing more so than usual, opposed when I quit last year and didn't have anything.

I need to just quit again.   

Do it!

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Hey guys, 

I've been in like a quitting limbo. I haven't really played anything really. When I go to I just get depressed and quit out anyway. 

I just got back from an event mostly for my company close to DC. It's a Music and Video games Festival but they have a rather large board game presence as well. 

Long story short the festival wasn't that great this year. Usually I socialize A LOT with a bunch of friends and new people, but for whatever reason that didn't happen this year. I ended up mostly working showing off a game I've been working on for two years now, but unfortunately I have yet to provide the advertisements I need to really get more attention. 

As there was a bunch of video games around, I just felt, for whatever reason like I didn't want to play. It was like this odd grey feeling. 

All in all, I spent pretty much the remaining money I had for this trip. I'm broke, just put in my two weeks at my job, and I currently feel like this is rock bottom. I've left my job for other reasons in regards to that job but still, I'm not sure what to do to get on with my life for the better. 

Hope you guys are fairing better! 

-Oct

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Question. What do you do when you're really into a game or two and want to stop gaming but are very much compelled to do so because of the habititual nature of it?  

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Question. What do you do when you're really into a game or two and want to stop gaming but are very much compelled to do so because of the habititual nature of it?  

In my view, it comes down to the person you want to be. Do you want to be that guy who is into that game, or is there something else you'd rather aspire to? If you can't moderate video games like many of us, you have to make a conscious choice. Evaluate who you want to be. Imagine yourself in 5 years - where you could be at. Which version of yourself do you prefer, the one who keeps playing this game, or the alternative you can think of? If the answer is the alternative, then quit. Remove the game. Go through the withdrawal, keep your head up! Remind yourself that you have standards for yourself and use this community to make yourself accountable. 

Edited by Senescence

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Wow it's been a LONG time since I've been here... 

I'm going to be completely honest here. 

I'm at the end of my rope. I'm tired of aimlessly playing games. I'm tired of wasting time. I'm tired of getting frustrated. I'm tired of being TIRED. 
When I stopped playing games, my life became 500% better. Now I'm just stuck. I know what I need to do, however I'm stuck in this loop between being stressed out at work and running from my issues by playing games. After work I'm too stressed out to get away from games, as the games I'm playing give me enough joy to keep me distracted enough to not think about having to go back to a bad situation at work. 

It's not that I don't know what to do - it's just I'm not sure how to execute this time around. 

I THROW MYSELF TO THE MERCY OF THE COURT! 
Please bistow up me guidance oh denizens of the gamequitters fourm! 

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Is it your particular job/company? Can you start looking for another job? Or do you need to sort working on a new career route?

If you are tired of gaming and/or it is causing you trouble, then start the detox. But it sounds like you either need to find a new job, or to work on your stress management so your job won't bother you so much. It sounds like this is a newer job since you said you put in your two weeks notice at your old job back in January?

Why not try another hand at the board game you were doing that kickstarter for?

Also, I planned on going to MAGfest after just catching the last day the previous year, but I was moving that weekend and sold my ticket. Looked at the line up of speakers and wasn't too impressed anyway (sorry, just read your previous comments on this page to get some background and noticed that).

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Is it your particular job/company? Can you start looking for another job? Or do you need to sort working on a new career route?

If you are tired of gaming and/or it is causing you trouble, then start the detox. But it sounds like you either need to find a new job, or to work on your stress management so your job won't bother you so much. It sounds like this is a newer job since you said you put in your two weeks notice at your old job back in January?

Why not try another hand at the board game you were doing that kickstarter for?

Also, I planned on going to MAGfest after just catching the last day the previous year, but I was moving that weekend and sold my ticket. Looked at the line up of speakers and wasn't too impressed anyway (sorry, just read your previous comments on this page to get some background and noticed that).

Hey, thanks a bunch for reading up on my journal. I appreciate it ! :) 

I work as a server so finding new work for me isn't that difficult but I've grown... confortable where I am but I'm more or less positioning myself to gtfo out of that place simply because its too toxic. 

I pretty much game today, to hide from going to work at my crappy job. I've been positioning myself for a detox. I did put my two weeks in 6 months ago when the new managers took over, but I decided to stick around because I didn't have anywhere else to go at the moment. 

As for my board game stuff, I've been working on two projects still! It's just taking some time to produce them is all. Also I need just a bit more capital to get it really off the ground. 

Magfest is generally a good time. I generally go now for work as I present my projects as part of the Tabletop Division of the convention, which is nice as I get some perks :D

 

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Howdy Octsober. I am curious as to why you relapsed after successfully completing the 90 day detox. It sounds like there could be some crucial information there that would be invaluable for introspection. If that's not the case at all and it's just the job, it's easy enough to get a new one. I've heard it's easier to find new employment while you're already employed and it definitely takes the financial pressure off your shoulders versus looking for work while being unemployed. A second 90 day detox sounds like the perfect time to make changes in your life that actually matter to you. Good luck!

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Howdy Octsober. I am curious as to why you relapsed after successfully completing the 90 day detox. It sounds like there could be some crucial information there that would be invaluable for introspection. If that's not the case at all and it's just the job, it's easy enough to get a new one. I've heard it's easier to find new employment while you're already employed and it definitely takes the financial pressure off your shoulders versus looking for work while being unemployed. A second 90 day detox sounds like the perfect time to make changes in your life that actually matter to you. Good luck!

Hey DeepSpaceAI! 

I did roughtly 100 days but I can explain why I jumped back into games.

I wasn't playing any games when I choose to stop playin during November 2015 - Feb 2016. Xcom 2 was coming out towards the last week and I enjoyed the first game so I bought it.  As my current PC didn't really play games too well I decided to upgrade as I received a nice return in my taxes. I was able to play all the new games from then onward. Overwatch came out and that was pretty much the game that sucked me in the most. 

My logic at the time on going back into games was that I felt that I was able to limit myself as I stopped playing for so long. However, its like a slow poison, and as time went on my habits changed back to where I started before my detox. 

I've recently left my job and have begun transforming my life. It's funny really because I'm technically not unemployed as I own a business :D. 

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Yeah, a slow poison sounds about right. Two of Cam's videos come to mind that really changed my perspective, my second example especially. The first video described relapsing after doing a 90 day detox (I don't quite remember the context of the video). Part of the detox is to avoid the hyper stimulation caused by gaming, so when you start playing again, you'll slowly start getting used to that level of activity again. I think being accustomed to that stimulation goes hand in hand with becoming addicted all over again. The other video was someone who managed to play in moderation after his detox and what his time spent per week was. He replied with, "I play about 10 hours a month." That number shocked me when I first heard it but it makes a lot of sense. If you play every day, or even every other day, it's easy to get sucked back in. It really seems like it has to be limited to a couple hours on one day of the weekend. The amount of time is not too different from watching a movie once a weekend. Maybe if you want to play in moderation after your detox, you should seriously consider only playing for an amount of time like that.

That's good that you're financially stable though. I imagine if that weren't the case, cravings and other things would be much more of a problem. How's your detox going? Or did you decide against doing it?

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Yeah, a slow poison sounds about right. Two of Cam's videos come to mind that really changed my perspective, my second example especially. The first video described relapsing after doing a 90 day detox (I don't quite remember the context of the video). Part of the detox is to avoid the hyper stimulation caused by gaming, so when you start playing again, you'll slowly start getting used to that level of activity again. I think being accustomed to that stimulation goes hand in hand with becoming addicted all over again. The other video was someone who managed to play in moderation after his detox and what his time spent per week was. He replied with, "I play about 10 hours a month." That number shocked me when I first heard it but it makes a lot of sense. If you play every day, or even every other day, it's easy to get sucked back in. It really seems like it has to be limited to a couple hours on one day of the weekend. The amount of time is not too different from watching a movie once a weekend. Maybe if you want to play in moderation after your detox, you should seriously consider only playing for an amount of time like that.

That's good that you're financially stable though. I imagine if that weren't the case, cravings and other things would be much more of a problem. How's your detox going? Or did you decide against doing it?

Hey again DeepspaceAI. 

Lots of good stuff here. I'm going to check out both those videoes. Thanks for pointing me the right direction! 

As for my job situation. I've got an 2nd interview with the Microsoft store this upcomming tuesday and I've got a new serving job at this local pub  in town. To be honest I was never really worried about finding new work, it's just I'd rather get back on working on the things that matter to me more or less. 

The detox has been like a rollercoster, I can go a few days without playing, be productive etc, and others I'll just game for most of the day. I think this is because there's a bunch of moving parts going on in my life at the moment where I need some kind of crutch (this is my excuse..). I'm also trying to cut out a mildly toxic group of people from my life, it's hard because some of them are family. 

I appreciate your help DeepspaceAI - thanks for your support! Means a good deal to me. 

-Oct

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I'm constantly stuck playing competitive Overwatch. It's by far the most frustrating experience KNOWINGLY stuck in the same loop playing the same crap, rolling the same dice, pulling the same slot machine lever. ITS BASICALLY INSANITY. I hate everything about this experience, most of the time, because there is absolutely no meaning behind anything gained within this system. 

So why the hell can't I stop? Analyzing this now, I see it's mostly because EVERYONE in my close friend group plays. I'm also praised by some as the better player, as I'll team up with some of them and help them rank up. I get the social implications of this, but WHY DOES THIS MATTER SO MUCH? 

I recently saw a Youtube vid about addiction by this pastor on a tedtalk. The crux of what he had discovered wasn't the addiction itself but rather his lack of approval . This is interesting to me as I can see how this is quasi true for me. I've been failing or rejecting certain things so by failure in key areas of life, like money, independence, etc, I've noticed that I've turned to things that give me a sense of approval that I've been lacking. I have a level of skill in games therefore I have a way to generate a kind of approval. 

I feel completely trapped. It's super petty playing games this way and I hate it. I know I should stop but it's like I can't because there's no other avenue in my life currently that is going anywhere so by removing this I'm not sure what to do with myself in the immediate. 

I have an Idea on what to do, but no idea how to execute.    

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Best thing where to start is cleaning your room! Then schedule some exercising, reading books( Slight Edge, The Power of Habit), youtube channels (i recommend improvement pill),go out for a walk. Start loving yourself and change will come. Slowly but it will appear! I swear. Don't act like a child. You are the man not a pussy. You are good enough. You are capable to make a better world.  Baby steps! Every small decision and habit is imporant! If you want you can contact me on ICQ or PM and i will help you. 

 

Recommend!!!!!!

https://www.amazon.com/No-More-Mr-Nice-Guy/dp/0762415339

Edited by Onlysoul

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Best thing where to start is cleaning your room! Then schedule some exercising, reading books( Slight Edge, The Power of Habit), youtube channels (i recommend improvement pill),go out for a walk. Start loving yourself and change will come. Slowly but it will appear! I swear. Don't act like a child. You are the man not a pussy. You are good enough. You are capable to make a better world.  Baby steps! Every small decision and habit is imporant! If you want you can contact me on ICQ or PM and i will help you. 

 

Recommend!!!!!!

https://www.amazon.com/No-More-Mr-Nice-Guy/dp/0762415339

Hello Onlysoul! 

You're absolutely right. I went to the gym, started cleaning my room, removed all electronics from my room, and started taking some charge. 
It's about taking charge and I need to start making moves that show that. 

Today was a good day. Thanks for giving me a push. 

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Before I post, I just wanted to make a brief statement. I try my best to not appear whiny. I generally say as I feel in the immediate, but it's not (for the most part) without awareness. 

I've been to some low points. and today has been pretty low. Sleep schedule is all over the place which is a major contributor. Saw that new Spiderman movie super early. Afterwards had the creative juices running a muck, wanting to be put to use. Ate and napped shortly afterwards for a few hours then went to an event in town for board games, as I was showing off one of my current projects. The turnout was low and within 30 minutes of my 2 hour session I called it early as a friend of mine had his birthday gathering before he left to go back to Seattle for work. 

It wasn't like I was super down or melancholy as I felt it, but mostly everyone at the party knew something was up as I've known them forever. A lot of "What's wrong?" and "Are you Okay?"'s floated around throughout the night. I mostly separated myself by either being outside or just staying to the outskirts of the group. The thing is with this particular group is that we go at least two decades back. There really isn't much that changes within. Same people that like to keep the group small, which is fine. Same music. Over at least a few years now of same tunes, I'm not sure I can take that part of the groups anymore.

But I digress... 

It wasn't until I was able to have a one on one chat with a friend whom is good at these hard times chats. At this point I was able to bring up what's really been bugging me. I run this business for board games and I feel like a complete failure. I'm a one man show, so all of my projects, to me feel like they're being done in the dark. I completely loathe my current game, mostly because it's OK but to my standard's it's not good enough. All and all I feel like I'm just stuck in the mud. I can't seem the find a path just yet and it's frustrating. 

I'm thinking about throwing in the towel. I haven't made a dime from anything I've down in my company and I don't think I can produce anything of merit. I'm just trying to be realistic. I quit my last job because it became a bad environment. I have a new job serving, and I'm waiting to hear back from Microsoft for a job at one of their stores. things are just pretty, bleh right now. I have absolutely no excitement for life. 

And I think that's one of the major issues. I have an Idea what I need to do. An Idea on how to start, but absolutely no will power to do it.
Just wanted to get this off my chest. 

 

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I think you need change you paradigm, your way of living, thinking, eating etc. You have bad attitude to life! Admit it! Start watching youtube videos on business, selfdevelopment. Try to find people who are on their way to become better persons and walking on this path of selfimprovement. You are great person with strong heart! I didn't know you but this is 100% true. You want to change something so you are here and you already started fighting for better future. Dont be ashamed, dont be afraid, love yourself and changle will appear. 

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