Jump to content
×
×
  • Create New...

My journal


Recommended Posts

Your perseverance alone will be the deciding factor in this endeavor of yours. So long as you keep striving to be better, you’ll get where you want to be. Keep it up!

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Dat 1-2 

Managed to stay away from the internet for the whole day which I'm quite pleased about.

The announcement of a new game I had been looking forward to for years has distracted me quite a bit and complicated things. I should distance myself from game news, otherwise I will end up struggling a lot more than I should 

  • Like 1
  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

19 hours ago, Paul A. said:

Your perseverance alone will be the deciding factor in this endeavor of yours. So long as you keep striving to be better, you’ll get where you want to be. Keep it up!

Thanks a lot for the kind words, I will, lets just hope that with the end of the summer vacations the situation gets easier

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 8/31/2022 at 1:12 AM, Faroe Islander said:

I will just delay the issue

 

On 8/31/2022 at 1:12 AM, Faroe Islander said:

sheer amount of things to is so large

On 8/31/2022 at 1:12 AM, Faroe Islander said:

time they would take to even be started

Well, maybe delaying the issue is good for us. I mean, we can use blockers until we fix our lifestyle to the point we are happier IRL than VR can give us... Though it can take months or possibly years :35_thinking:

Edited by chillenger
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Today I have struggled a lot in the morning on and off with the internet and to some extent PMO, leading to me having to restart the process which is honestly just discouraging because of all the help I received from friends and the faith they had in me managing to pull through. I haven't lost hope but I did struggle to deal with it during my work, I hope I didn't cause many issues to the other people around me.

Thankfully the afternoon work and going to the calisthenic bars did give me some hope again as it offered some relief and showed me that you can ended up having important and interesting conversations about issues that trouble you both even with people you barely know anything about.

That's pretty much it right now I'm a bit disappointed in myself but if it will get better if I continue to put work into it 

 

 

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

12 hours ago, chillenger said:

 

Well, maybe delaying the issue is good for us. I mean, we can use blockers until we fix our lifestyle to the point we are happier IRL than VR can give us... Though it can take months or possibly years :35_thinking:

It is possible, similar techniques have been used in alcohol addiction treatment and in treatment to other addictions so it isn't out of the question, for now I will just stick to the blockers I have and keep going out and staying clear of the places where I tend to relapse more, though eventually I will have to sort something out as when I'm on holidays wether  I like it or not I have to stay in this bad place

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

@GrainSiloEnthusiastI will try my best, thanks for the encouragement.

And also congrats on hitting the 90 day milestone. As someone who has never been able to go for more than 2 weeks without games/videos it really inspiring to see someone not only accomplishing it but also taking it a step further, aiming for 1 year and using it to deal with multiple problems in her life.

Good luck on your journey

 

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Day 1

Woke up super late, went to a family reunion, standar stuff now I'm working on getting back into my normal schedule and seeing were to go tomorrow as it is Sunday and therefore both the library and my classes are not available. I think I'll try to go to the beach, it is about time I begin to explore new places near my area because when I don't I just end up staying at home and making it all worse

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Day 2 restart

Did pretty well in the morning woke up at a reasonable hour and tried to go to the beach.

Returned past midday and then things went downhill, too much inside my home without fun activities to distract me.

In the late night I wondered the streets and came to the conclusion that I can not live with a smartphone as it has for years now been the perfect gateway for my addiction to influence too many different aspects of my life. I will give it to a close friend of mine when we next meet, possibly this next week or the one after that and use a flip phone knowing full well the many inconveniences and changes that I will have to make to adapt to this decision.

Need to go to sleep earlier and recover from "failure" faster  

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Day 1 

More or less good, I took my phone in the morning with me and ended up listening to music and podcasts for quite a bit of time, left it aside in the afternoon and managed to have a more or less enjoyable afternoon while also doing some work/study + chores.

Takeaways:

1-Touching the phone soon in the morning is about the worst thing I can do 

2-I need to learn how to deal with "getting stuck" in my studies, right now I just get demoralized until the some kind of deadline hits me which in the long run isn't good for my health, learning and final result of the project

3-Need to keep it moving, the more activities the better getting bored while being at a conducive place for cravings is about the worst thing I can do

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Day 2 

Spent a lot of time thinking about strategies to implement in the games I used to play, pretty much the thing that stopped me from going back was having switched to a flip phone and going to the library, I still did struggle and didn't get much work done but the time it takes me to walk back home gave me enough of a break to catch myself and think of all the consequences of continuing to game like disappointing friends and family, missing even more opportunities, knowing it would all be for nothing and I would end up stressing out and undoing the progress I did in the game etc...

Having this space is really helpful, I just hope that with time and some effort, eventually I will be able to deal with the issue without needing so many deterrents to give me enough time and clear headedness to  properly deal with my issues.

Tomorrow I'll focus on revisiting the reasons why I quit and trying to keep the time I spend on social media and websites in check even for this one, it is helpful for hearing/giving advice and having some more accountability but I don't want it to end up hurting my sleep schedules and overall nigh routine

Edited by Faroe Islander
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Day 3

Listening a lot to podcast it helps with internet problem and it is not as bad on my mental health and stress as games but it is not perfect, ideally I would like to eventually also give up on these for better concentration time and motivation to try new things, right now I'm just contempt with how I am right now as I'm not having to deal with as many issues as I was before but it is definitely still hampering my ability to fully get back in track to put myself in the position I want to be in terms of social life, studies, hobbies, economic independency and things I have just had to give up on for a while

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Days 4-6
Struggled with games, specially in this last day as I had no real activities to do other than cooking and traveling back home from uni

I need to find more activities to do, otherwise I just tend to default back to games/podcasts to fill the gap 

 

Broke this morning by the standars that I had set, nothing to do coupled with being tired, at home and with nothing enjoyable to do, plans for that day suddenly got cancelled

Edited by Faroe Islander
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Day 1 

Listened to podcast, rode for a bit to buy some stuff and visit family, finally walked around in the streets and ate not much but at least it let me finish some of the chores I still had to do, tomorrow I'll be more restrictive with both my thoughts and actions.

Not enough social skills/opportunities to develop them, I have to go out more so hopefully plans will still go through, still have to know what to do with the new responsibilities that come from starting shifts/study again 

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

You are not alone! I am so stuck in my room with no one to talk to and I am not even that good socially to mingle! Been going to hobby clubs and in person aa meetings looking like a wreck. What I'm saying is that I'm with you the whole way!

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Day 1

Been struggling with games, sleep schedules, pmo and work productivity.

It is my fault and I will get back to working again right now, When I don't focus on dealing with games everything starts to go sour so, I'm starting once more and I will return to using this website more as it helps with overall motivation and accountability which clearly outsets the negatives like delayed sleep schedule

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Day 2 

Spent most of the day traveling and studying during the trip. Fixing the sleep schedule and returning to old habits and routines I created last year helped a lot with dealing with downs and ups during the day.

Do I feel great about the day? No, I peaked a bit with seeing a bit of news or listening with some gameplay vids...  I don't know if iI would have been able to stay away from games if my fav streamer had been live today, but here we are. Tomorrow I'll focus on finalising  a project I've had on my mind for a bit and then trying to go to my grandpa's hometown, there is no internet there, I have no smartphone and there are more natural places where I could go, it should help a little

I want to reconnect with the people in my grandpa's hometown I've always been a stranger there always keeping to myself, I don't know if it is too late but I'll give it my best to change a bti

Link to comment
Share on other sites

neither bad nor good, listened to podcast, played with some friends and did some work 

not the most productive day but not the worst either I can't really count it as a win or a loss it has just been a little but of everything.

Tomorrow I'll travel more, lately I've just been kind of blank, no big urges, no big rushes, no big moments of emotion/grief no energy just old habits.

I wish I could go back to the time where it was constant 4 day or 7 day in between relapses, they were filled with grief but it feel more alive and positive, who knows maybe I'm just talking from the confort of my couch while not clearly remembering how it used to be like.

Anyways since I don't really feel anything I might as well just focus on the activities I do tomorrow I'll try to spend as much time as posible traveling and finish the tasks I've been putting off like gardening and study related activities. Games are fun, specially when enjoyed with friends rather than alone but they don't give me the same wellbeing I found when being game free, specially in the nights just before going to sleep, I'll just find a psychologist to tell this to maybe they can help.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

back from a hiatus 

I spent time gaming and thinking about games, specially on the nights and on weekends, going to bed multiple times with my smartphone on which I'm not proud about.

I did manage to do some of the things I had pending like gardening but overall didn't do too much.

What I found helped me out the most was getting people with which to do replacement activities like studying doing a bit of sport or just hanging out.

I'm still not there with a lot of things but those seem to be working, what I really need to get down right now is the schedules, places and decisiveness to leave games back as I feel like I'm missing many opportunities because of it but really struggle to leave it completely behind, ending up instead just playing or consuming a reduced amount of games. What I did find is that when I start doing things and finishing little tasks motivation just seems to come to me so it may be worth it to try expanding on that idea

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
 Share