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Mario's Journal,


WorkInProgress

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Day 26

Was abit better. Did some studying  and go some other stuff done too. Today i have to work for 6hours but i will continue this upward curve. Will study on the train to work and afterwards. Realised this mourning that i am way to slow with my routine. Did my morning routine in half of the time because I have to go to work early and feel fresher today.

Health

run: check

Relationships: 

Call or visit one of my family/friends everyday and have a good talk.:no

 plan one activity every weekend with my wife: no( rly got to do this! today i will brainstorm for it)

Personal Development: 

read every morning for 30 min, listen to podcasts: check

meditate for 10min every day: check

find the most uncomfortable organisationtask and start doing it: ( did it but will delet it here because i try now jsut to do them if they come in)

Career:

work 1hour every day my internship proposals: yep

daily 4 hour studying session every day: around two hours

Im gratefull for:

- beeing on an upward curve again.

- bad sleep can't stop me

- fast jogginng worked otu fine today

- baked beans and toast for breakfast

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@Hitaro thanks for your comment! yeah it is a work in progress ;)

I think this checklist i put out here is wasting too much space. I replace it by a textfile and just report on the habbit of checking my checklist until it is a habbit(mbe 2weeks or so)

Day27(didn't send it out yesterday O.o)

Checklist: check

Yesterday was much ebtter. did some studying worked and in the evening as i was tired i cleaned two rooms. Today i have more time then i will see how hard i can tackle the studies but teh good thing is: Short time motivation is kicking in. Next tuesday it is examday and now i get motivation of the pressure( only 4 studying days to go!).

Im gratefull for:

- feeling awesome at running this morning

- studying pressure

- beeing able to show interest in new members of the forum

- the slight edge

- beautiful snow covered landscape outside my windows.

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Day 28

Checklist: check

Yesterday was good. Got some studies done and had even fun at learning some extra stuff I don't actually need for my exam. Found a nice ressource on continuum mechanics(this is where i wanna find work later on because fluids are jsut fascinating). I see how studying becomes gradually easier now i do it everyday atleast for two hours. I am carefully optimistic about implementing learning about engineering stuff in my daily life. Maybe i didn't chose the wrong study subject. Maybe i was just not commited enough. Additionally to my 5km jogging route i did an one hour walk with my wife and talked about life. It still amazes me how she gets motivated by me, while i do nothing but improve my own habbits. Really awesome side effect.

Had a dream this morning about a warcraft 3 game and my favourite wc3 streamer spoke to me and wanted to add me to his buddies. Felt a urge to install it and play again as i woke up(did not do it ofcourse). Was really strange. Especially because I had no urges to game since two weeks. Well this time is the past. I don't feel sorry but a little nostalgic.

Im gratefull for:

- motivation spreading by beeing a good example

- beeing excited about my studys!

- journalling

- beeing able to share my experiences with ggamequitting with new people

- all these awesome new journals wich distract me in such a good way

- good habbits

- having a urge to go joggin now:/

-beeing alive

- feeling awesome( just writing this stuff down seems to produce a lot of endorphines this morning)

 

ok cya guys i am out running through the beautiful countryside in front of my village(and this time i sent my entry!).

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Day 29

well yesterday was ok.  I try to keep the slight edge philosiphy in mind(basicly do the right thing everytime,then your life improves gradually). But lately I stop thinking that way wich sends me right back into procrastination. Will take some time till i get fully used to it.It is strange that i don't get pissed on me if I don't study because it is very important now. I just see myself drive against the wall and ignore it. Or I do something against it and feel great. I don't know if this lethargy is a protection mechanism of my mind for not feeling bad. Well as you can see at the tone of my rambling, I'm not in a great mood thsi mourning. And Valentine's day is not the reason. My wife and em aren't really into this day and she always forget what date it is so we don't care so mcuh about it.  I don't know guess it si just a funk. Soon a month. Let's see what happens.

I felt kind of bad because noone read my comment wich is pathetic. I spent to much time here in this forum. I will cut it to 30-60min everyday in the morning.

Checklist: check

I am gratefull for:

- my wife

- left overs from yesterday

- having first world problems

- having a nice warm home

 

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Day 30

Ok today is my first exam of the season. gone through some old questions and could only answer 90% of the questions in a way that i think give full points. Also possible that i cheatedt myself a bit by the rest of the questions and are worse then I think I am.  Answered the rest on a peek note in the hope to memorize them last minute. Today is my birthday also and i am gamefree for a month now. Big day today. Let's see if i can cash in some results. I just hope my brain delivers today. Wish me luck!

Checklist: check

I'm gratefull for:

- the opportunity to reward myself for my work

- jogging is a habbit now(needs no willpower at all)

- excited about starting bodyweight training again

- nice wrist preperation i found( were my biggest problem last time i tried)

- beeing honest with my wife

- feeling prepared

-not beeing sick

 

 

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Day 32

The exam yesterday went very well. I actually have the hope that it will be a 1. In germany the simplified grading system goes like: 1(awesome) 2(good) 3(ok) 4(enough) 5(you suck, try again).

I realised the last days while reading the power of habbit that my "mourning routine" isn't actually a mourning routine. Just some stuff I do at random times in the morning. Made an awesome new routine yesterday. But instead of sticking to it, i'm writing now this journal entry. You can see how my self-discipline needs some improvement. But well i did change my procrastination patterns. Instead of playing games, reading fiction or browse the internet, I started to clean the house write journals in a foreign language and read nonfiction books or listen to podcasts. I waste my time productivly(is this a word?) now ;).

I actually feel pretty content(new word i learned recently!). This brightens my mood, but  is potentially dangerous for my will to improve. I am not where i want to be. I know this somewhere back in my brain, but if I don't listen to that voice(wich is pretty easy), I just let all my achievements slip away, until I feel like crap and have a real incentive again. But not this time. At this point the slight-edge-philosiphy helps me to keep going. Summarized it says: There is no standing still in live. You are on a upward curve or a downward curve(in between is the slight edge). Success/ Failure. Every little decision you make, puts you in one or the other direction. In my limited life experience i've seen this concept to be true. Thats why I believe in it right now.

Another mindest wich helps me to get through the day with less self-doubts(@cam thanks for that concept.):

All I do is an experiment. Because I don't trust other people saying me how to life my life, I often rejected advice in the past. But if i see their advice as statements wich are still to be tested,i actually start doing something ,instead of doubting  my past and future decisions.

Checklist:check(just a reminder for me. Feel free to ignore it.)

I'm gratefull for:

- my new hearthrate monitor(gadget yeah)

- my new mechanical lawnmower(xD no idea why im so thrilled about it)

- feeling content

- beeing still young(26)

- awesome quality time with my wife at my birthday

 

 

 

 

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Day 32

@cam ty for your support. Means alot to me that tehre is one out there reading my crap ;)

Got really slacky after the exam. had a crazy morning instead of starting my new routine. I sat 2 hour for my comuter in the morning gone jogging, cam back drank 2 beer and watched some random movies(dirty grandpa and tangled). Felt strange afterwards but had fun  But im sure that this day will be better(or more productive). I started this morning training wiht bodyweight because i want to swap jogging wiht muscle training every second day. My left knee starts to hurt after 5-10min jogging and i dont want charge it further this way. It went ok bu i have to improve my posture and are pretty out of shape in this aspect. But thats kind of great because this way there are many things wich i can easily improve. Kind of problematic is the short item to the next exams.  I will have to press some big study sessions in over the next 4 days and postpone my sidejob a bit. I will meet my chef today and talk wiht him about it.

Checklist:check(just a reminder for me. Feel free to ignore it.)

I'm gratefull for:

-bodyweight training feeling promising

- balanced moods lately

- my wife not making fun about my bodyweight training(I'm sure it looked ridiculous)

- cam

 

 

Edited by WorkInProgress
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Day 33

The talk with my chef was really constructive. Now i have my mind to fokus on studying. Atlast after i cleaned my appartment...

And i started to reduce my coffee intake. I will only drink one cup of coffee instead of 4-5 every day. Yesterday I was tempted several times but stayed strong.I think i stay at one cup for a week and then cut it entirely. My hope is that it gets easier to fokus on work if I reduce my coffeinlevel. To keep this journal more interesting I will start a things-I-learned-today section. This will force me to reflect my days more and be eager to learn new stuff.

Checklist:check(just a reminder for me. Feel free to ignore it.)

I'm gratefull for:

- improving

- electricity

- having a family

Edited by WorkInProgress
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Day 34

OK appartment is cleaned and things are gooing back upwards. It will be hard to be great at the exam at Tuesday and i "wasted" enough time in the forum reading other entrys now. Gooing to start studying now.

What i learned today:

- cleaning the surfaces and the dishes isnt cleaning the kitchen.

Checklist:check(just a reminder for me. Feel free to ignore it.)

I'm gratefull for:

- clean appartment

- humour

- apple juice with sparkly water(germany!)

Edited by WorkInProgress
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Day 35

Was out wiht a friend last night and drank too much. I have an hangover now and have to study for the exam at tuesday... Atleast it is getting better.  I will use my afternoon as good as possible. Didn't meditate or do sport yesterday wich throw me off blance yesterday. It had the potential do be a great day but felt very stressfull and annoying. I am nto entirely sure if it was only the missing sport/meditation but I am glad that today my mood seems to be better(even besides my head aches)

What I learned today:

- I can meditate with headaches and it still works

I am gratefull for:

- declining head aches

- time

- day 35

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Day 36

I don't want to react to things anymore i want to be proactive. Beeing disciplined abotu work and university gives free space for Creativity and stops stress. Lately I start get cravings again and i know it is because of my exams are kicking in. Because of the inflicted stress i want to waste time by gaming. Freakin illogical brain at work! OK now the working week has started and my wife is out of the house early. This givesd me the easy opportunity to be more strict about my mouring routine to automate it. I start right now with 15min meditation followed by 20-60min sport.after that standard bathroom procedure and the day can come. Was procrastinating this wiht this journal entry but now I am actually excited about it adn start right after my gratitude journal.

What I learned today:

-I need to be proactive instead of reactive to be content.

I am gratefull for:

- no alkohol in my system anymore

- excited aboiut morning routine!

- trying out new things

- my cats even if they are annoying as hell

 

PS.: awesome article about scientific reasearch on beeing happy check it out(or the video)http://www.mindful.org/science-reveals-well-skill/

Edited by WorkInProgress
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Day 37

Today it was hard to get out of bad because my wife was away over night. Snoozed for the first time in 20days or so. Did it for nearly an hour. Still have enouhg time but have to cut my sport routine this morning wich is kind of annoying.I ahve my second exam today and aren't prepared enough because i procrastinated to much last week.  Everyone says this special exam is easy and I hope it is true. Well meditation helps with my nerves but still i will be studying this week because the enxt oen is coming in 8days. I still didn't look for a internship wich is priority now because i want to start one at 1may. Many things to do but resisted the urges to play wich have a revival in this situation and i see this as a win. In the past I would played away yesterday out of stress. Now i watched 2movies and did study the rest of the day. I got a proper chance if i stay calm and have a little luck. I take this as a win

What I learned today:

- Mindfulness is a superpower(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w6T02g5hnT4)

I am gratefull for:

-meditation

- coffee

- the opportunity of writing a exam today

PS: Read through my diary and realised I stopped beeing hungry for improvement. Even if I am in a better spot of my life allready i can't be just content. It made me happy to imporve everyday and there is no reason to stop or to slow this progress down. Time to pick some things up I wanted to achieve and dropped along the way: Learn english grammar, revisit stuff I studied to have more knowledge, improve handwriting, learn 10-finger typing. keep the appartment clean. Ok have to go to stuff!

Edited by WorkInProgress
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Day 37

Hell yeah. This exam was a presentation of the 80/20 rule. Went surprisingly well but for the next exam i havve to be prepared better. To fokus on the right things brings you only that far, if i want get the best grades, I have to put in the extra work! I will start today, but got a lot of work to do. I guess my train time will be spent programming today, to get some free time in the morning. I allready spent a lot of time reading interesting blogs/articles in the morning. I will check out an interesting blog about personal development more frequently in the future. I like his style and sense of humour, while he is still insightfull(http://markmanson.net). Suprisingly good reads in the internet if you search for it! It got kind of a habbit to start my productive day with journalling and  in the past I tried to change it, because i thought it will hinder my fokus and distract me. But lately I realized it helps me to think about things i want to do. This means there is no real downsite on starting your day wiht a cup of coffeee in this forum(yeah!). I just need to get going afterwards. This said I better get out there jogging. It is allready morning and the sun goes up!

What I learned today:

- there are nice reads on the internete for free

Im gratefull for:

- 80/20-rule working out

- new found motivation to improve

- it isn't raining so i stay dry at my jogging route

- good fun at reading this morning

- my wife(i know it gets boring but im gratefull damnit!)

- my mood beeing great thsi morning

- that i could continue this for another 10 entrances, because i feel happy right now

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Day 38

Had a really busy day yesterday without beeing too productive. Needed like 4 hours to write a simple application to one internship. But I finished it! Have a lot to study in 8 days is the next exam and i have to do some work for my sidejob. But I did not procrastinate and got to work yesterday. Did earn some extra money in the afternoon wich is very usefull right now.. It was strange that i got a bad conscience after 4 hours of working. It felt like i should have studied or worked instead.  Next time i will make more breaks to restore my fokus. Guess in the long run it saves me time and nerves. I am often afraid to schedule breaks because they are kind of the starting point of my procrastination. Five minute breaks evolve to 15min breaks wich evolve to 45min sitting around dooing stuff i don't need to do. But I'm sure this gets better with practice. I worked yesterday for 10 hours at things wich are important for me wich is a good quota.

My brain seems to get into old shape again. I feel remembered at my school years where i was more creative and had better ideas then today. I like to think again. Strange to say it that way but i often felt just annoyed by many of my thoughts in the past years. Now as my fokus shifts away from gaming and desperation i find Joy in my thoughts wich is a good sign i would say. Maybe this is a sideeffect of meditation. I skipped it yesterday by the way because I was motivated and didn't want to calm down if I am excited about work. if that makes sense to you. OK I am getting hungry and I want to work out before breakfeast. so i have to go.

What I learned today:

- I can work without breaks for a long time. It just isn't productive

- I can't do all things at once, I can only plan properly and prioritize to get the important stuff done. I have to deal with the things I don't do afterwards.

Im gratefull for:

- beeing mentally stable lately

- my brain seems to work better lately

- today beeing bodyweight training day(shit weather outside).

- found a habbit loop: cue -> feeling hungry  habbit-> workout  reward -> eat breakfast

PS: 2 hours wasted starting with porn gooing over to the bad site of youtube... well i will commit to no porn now! Take that freakin internet!

Edited by WorkInProgress
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@Marchosias It just looked kind of ridiculous the first time it tried this:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=44ScXWFaVBs

But hey yesterday she felt my "abs"  and complimented me:D. Doesn't matter anyway, I do it for me to stay healthy. After my knee started to hurt a bit i had to find a alternative just go for a jog everyday( yeah i realize that this sounds strange but jogging in the morning really lifted my spirit and i won't give this up).

Btw.: I was always the guy not doing any Sport. It is awesome that I do it everyday now.

Day 39

I keep it short today. I started dooing the the Altuner workbook to become and idea machine: It is basicall an exercise to write down 10 ideas to different topics every day.

I hope to get a creativity boost out of this. Got still ashitload of work to do and had to postpone a selfset duedate ofr my sidejob. But guess it doesn't amtter too much if I'm not that awesome there aslong as my exams are gooing well. It is a try to prioritize even if I#m not entirely sure if it is the right move I have to try and learn of the result.

What I learned today:

people actually are reading my journal( thanks @Spinips, @Marchosias and @Zakaex)

O.o

Im gratefull for:

- this community

- sport beeing so easy to habitualize

- having a save home and noone to throw bombs on my neighborhood

- living in a country with an awesome social system

- having the luxury to choose what i want to do with my life

Edited by WorkInProgress
had to correct copied day
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Hm, I've bookmarked that video of yours. I do plan to start exercising myself as well ... back when I did it (for a couple of weeks, ech) I followed this one which is a little different: Beginner Body Weight Circuit Workout

Do tell how the Altucher's idea exercise thing works. I'm somewhat skeptical. I mean: it obviously works for him, and he's a millionaire author, so what's my problem.

Yeah, I wonder how many people actually read other people's journals. I know I haven't for a while because I was too preoccupied with myself, but everyone should start doing it eventually. I think the fact that some people write huge chunks of texts with mega long paragraphs is also a part of a potential problem.

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