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16 Oct 17

Days to go: 182

Days to Ultra-Trail: 214

Another marathon in the books. I am happy that I managed to finish another one and move from the 1% of people who have completed one to a smaller portion of that 1%, but I am also terribly disappointed. I did not beat my goal of 4h30, and not even close either. My first marathon took me 5h03, this one took me 4h53, so it was at least an improvement. But I was shattered when the 4h30 pace marker overtook me at the 30km (3/4) mark. I tried to keep up with her for as long as I could, but that turned out to be only about 2km. Then the battle became instead of physically like last time with my hip/ankle, and more with my mind which kept telling me "what's the point", "you're defeated man". That, my friends, was hard work to try and overcome and was exhausting. I tried setting new targets to keep me going, like picking out people in the crowd I thought I was fitter than and should beat (very shallow I know but in those moments its whatever it takes) and trying to keep up with them or overtake them. Once I got to the finish line and saw the time I broke down. Couldn't even talk to my wife who was there waiting for me. I felt like I had just gone to the playoffs and my team lost. An embarrassment.

TL;DR - this marathon was a mental battle not a physical one.

So what now? I still have the ultra-trail next year which I am keen to do and need to start following a training plan for. A friend has asked me to help them do a marathon in January in Hobart; they think they wouldn't be able to do it unless I ran with them and helped them out, but I don't know. I am flattered they asked me and considered me a friend to be able to help, but I don't have the anger like I did at the end of the first marathon. Now it's just disappointment. So I will need to meditate and reflect on that to see if it is the right decision for me. I am hoping that I will feel better about doing two marathons eventually and I will forget about the disappointment, and I will be reminded why I am entering these running events in the first place and get back out there, but for now it's a bit of soul searching.

I've been a bit quiet on the forums the last two weeks. I have been following my usual routine of waking up in the morning and checking the posts etc, but found it challenging to write my own journal entries. I didn't know why for a while, but now I do. I came to the realization on the flight on Friday it was because I am neglecting my meditation and ultimately my mental wellness. I prioritized work and other tasks above meditation and study, and as a result I couldn't get my thoughts together or didn't have the hunger each morning when I woke up. I have traditionally used the running every day as my meditation period and to get into the flow, but because I was either resting or spending a lot of time at work that was preventing this, I was getting quite wound up in my head. So I got quite excited of having just a few hours of me and the road to hopefully get myself back in line again, and it feels like it has worked this morning. I feel a lot lighter mentally, my thoughts are together, and I feel more energetic/enthusiastic. Maybe during the days I don't run I need to get out there and walk to achieve the same aim. I just finished Arnold Swarzenegger's autobiography and the last chapter was very powerful, it basically gave his blueprint on life. Two things stood out to me the most; exercise every day no matter what, and stay hungry. The first one is easy to incorporate in my routine as I know it will help me mentally, the second one will be a bit more challenging as I work out what this means to me.

Battleplan for today

1. Go for a walk, even if it is just to the bottom of the hill.

2. Work out what staying hungry means to me.

3. Get my study sorted/submitted. I need to get this off my mind.

Grateful corner

1. My wife being tolerant of me when I'm mentally all over the place.

2. Work for footing the bill for the marathon, my frequent flyers for paying for the flight and hotels.com for the free hotel night - essentially the trip to Melbourne for the run was free.

3. My close friends that were watching my progress on the marathon event app and sending me messages of encouragement which I could see on my watch.

Edited by giblets

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Woah, there's so much detail here and everything is so organized! Keep up the work and good luck on your running/healing progress!

Thanks mate! I feel it is a bit disorganized and just general text or typing out gibberish, but it works for me which is all that matters ^_^

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22 Oct 17

Days to Ultra-Trail: 208

Days until I graduate: ~365

Days to next run: ??

So I slipped into a black hole this last week. Initially it was from pouring myself into work, I began working 17 hour days to try and get in front of my work load, as I was instructing and being crushed by paperwork. I think I have somewhat got back in front of the pile, but I do need to work today (Sunday) to feel comfortable about next week. Sure I could not work these hours, stick to my usual 7.5/8 a day, but that is not going to achieve what I want to, or give the best service to my team. It's alright, it's only temporary, and will calm down in a week. Or at least that is what I keep telling myself. So outside of working 0600-2300 I was doing very little else, including spending time with my family, which is the worst. My wife gets it, and has seen me work longer hours before and coped. I am looking forward to her leaving this week for her work for a few days, as bad as that sounds, to let her get away for a few days to have by herself (somewhat), and spend time with her mates, even if they are work colleagues. It will also let me have a day or two forced with my son. Such a innocent happy little chap.

Then I hit the wall about Thursday. I was so tired and drained and just over life. I am not sure if it was depression or being bone tired (about Friday last time after marathon 1, I fell in a heap), but I could not bring myself to get out of bed. It has been a very long time since I have had that feeling. It's the "you're going to be in strife if you don't get up and turn up to work or do X" feeling, but your brain is all "I don't care. Let it happen." That was a challenge. In the end I had someone visiting from out of town to talk about work so I had to go, which willed me out of bed. That was a horrendous day. After getting an extra 3 hours sleep that day I seemed to be back to normal, but I was still very very down about work, or specifically dealing with some people/specific element of it.

Since then, I'm still in the black hole - enjoying the disconnect while trying to catch up with a lot of personal chores/tasks/etc. I need to get my final study submission done today for the semester - what is making it hard is the lecturer has told me I have already passed with my high marks so far, so my motivation to submit the last assignment for the sake of submitting it is quite low. Still, it needs to be done, and if I get about 50% I will get a distinction for the semester. Which, while on the subject, is why I have updated my counters. I have been doing some reflecting on what is important to me right now, and the things that are important is to keep running and to finish my studies. All other things must come second. I am still undecided if I want to do another marathon, specifically the one in Hobart, and I will need to decide soon. There is a few shorter runs nearby in the next month that I might get involved in to see if I still like the whole experience of it all, and I do need to get training for the ultra marathon up in the mountains. I am looking forward to this, and so is my wife, as we have been talking about going camping for the last year and a half and have not done it, so this might be the kick in the pants we need. Travel up on the Friday, run Saturday morning (I assume it will take all of it, if not longer), then relax and spend time with the family at the campsite Saturday night, and have a leisurely drive back on Sunday. Once the study is done I should feel a lot more relaxed about this plan.

The Minimalists have announced their tour in Sydney as well - so it seems we are getting a lot of tours soon! I still haven't decided if I want to go to that one yet, I have gone to a few other live podcast recordings and to be honest I didn't really enjoy them. I think the appeal to podcasts for me is being able to learn something or listen to something thought provoking while pottering around doing my normal life, not sitting looking at someone on stage talking in a crowd with a bunch of other people. Adam Roa will be completely different to this - he is such an out there guy I need to see him perform for myself, and Cam will be leading the charge for his show so that is going to be super cool.

I am struggling to get my projects completed too which is a source of frustration - there is always something not quite right with all the parts to get started. Right now I need screws, self tapping ones, and I keep being sent the wrong sized ones. I have no idea where I could find tiny hobby screws in Sydney so I am a bit stuck.

Battleplan for today

1. Finish reports for work.

2. Submit assignment to get study off my mind for 2017.

3. Take my son to the park. Google new ones we haven't been to.

Grateful corner

1. The innocence of youth to make your first world problems disappear.

2. 24/7 Parcel lockers - so handy when you work crazy hours to get your packages, and they're free.

3. Gluten free bread flourmix - finally gluten free bread that doesn't taste like a brick.

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Hey good job on reflecting so deeply. Especially with your workload this is important. Make sure this is only temporary or you will suffer from this. A weekend camping could be a great way to get some distance and replenishment. 

How many kids do you have? Is your wife a stay at home mom? My first son was born last friday, so I am right now in the process of figuring the whole father thing out. Do you have any tips and tricks for me? 

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I agree with @WorkInProgress, temporary highs in work happen sometimes but working hours call for more working hours. The public servant paradox I think it was called in my country, work tends to occupy all the available space. Know about Demir Gjw... impronunciable surname, the one from Lifehack Bootcamp @Cam Adair interviewed a while ago? His main expertise came from being completely overwhelmed at work in the past, almost lost his marriage, had mental breakdowns, a mess. And if you have the chance to talk with Cam in the tour, ask him about his own work habits. I've seen them personally and I can assure you they are nothing superhuman.

I know it can be tempting to say "But man, you don't know how much work I'm facing", I've also seen the opposite "ethic" (rather "habit") in my mother: around 12 hours of work almost every day and the only thing she archives is long and pointless sessions of inferior performance and low-quality delivery. In less pedantic words, spending all day stressed and unfocused, making constant mistakes, and almost zero productivity.

Rest hard bro!

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Hey good job on reflecting so deeply. Especially with your workload this is important. Make sure this is only temporary or you will suffer from this. A weekend camping could be a great way to get some distance and replenishment. 

How many kids do you have? Is your wife a stay at home mom? My first son was born last friday, so I am right now in the process of figuring the whole father thing out. Do you have any tips and tricks for me? 

I only have 1, which is a challenge enough as it is! My wife works part time so my son goes to child care a few days a week. Congratulations on your boy! It totally changes your life, you may not know it initially (I think I was trying to fight it) but eventually they reshape your whole life whether you realise it or not - and it's up to you whether it is for good or bad. I am still trying to figure it out myself - I don't think there is ever a point you can reach where you have "figured it out", because they keep changing.

The only real tip I have for you is I am a big fan of part time child care. My son has learnt so much from going 2-3 days a week, from some sign language, to manners, to basic words. I doubt that my wife and I would have been able to teach him the amount of stuff he has learned otherwise. A lot of it is focused around communicating, and I have noticed the easier he is able to communicate (whether it is the right thing or not) is the less frustrated he becomes; he cries less and throws less tantrums. I guess it makes sense, when babies cry that is the only way they know how to communicate, and then they get frustrated when you don't understand what that means. We go through the same cycle of emotions in our daily lives! He's also great around other kids now too, instead of sitting and staring at them or just crying because they want to share toys or play with him, he smiles says hello and gets involved.

I thought I would raise that as some people are firmly for or against child care. Like, passionately. I am not passionate about it, but it definitely has its pros and cons. The big pro is what I said above, the big con is the amount of times he has got sick, and then passed that bug onto me. I keep telling myself this means I don't have to deal with this when he goes to school as he will have a great immune system! I have heard/seen that kids that go 5 days a week begin to lash out after a while, and kids that don't go at all suffer from separation anxiety really bad when they get older (whether it is school or staying at friends' houses).

 

I agree with @WorkInProgress, temporary highs in work happen sometimes but working hours call for more working hours. The public servant paradox I think it was called in my country, work tends to occupy all the available space. Know about Demir Gjw... impronunciable surname, the one from Lifehack Bootcamp @Cam Adair interviewed a while ago? His main expertise came from being completely overwhelmed at work in the past, almost lost his marriage, had mental breakdowns, a mess. And if you have the chance to talk with Cam in the tour, ask him about his own work habits. I've seen them personally and I can assure you they are nothing superhuman.

I know it can be tempting to say "But man, you don't know how much work I'm facing", I've also seen the opposite "ethic" (rather "habit") in my mother: around 12 hours of work almost every day and the only thing she archives is long and pointless sessions of inferior performance and low-quality delivery. In less pedantic words, spending all day stressed and unfocused, making constant mistakes, and almost zero productivity.

Rest hard bro!

This is very true, sending good time after bad, the sunk cost. I will only allow myself to work so much in the short time while I am trying to do 2 jobs essentially. When it is over in about 3 weeks (from memory), I am going back to only working the minimum hours, no matter how much work I have. Having this mentality for the rest of the year meant I became very creative and focused on working smarter and more efficiently. It helped that going through the detox to shape my mindset for this resulted in being addicted/focused on personal development so I had started listening or reading a lot about efficient and being a creator not a consumer.

 

24 Oct 17

Days to Ultra-Trail: 202

Days until I graduate: ~363

Days to next run: ??

Not much to update at all today, so thanks to Hitaru and WIP for the feedback (no idea why I can't do tags anymore - I must have changed a setting in my browser somehow). I have realised two things yesterday, which can dovetail into what I am grateful for and my battle plans.

The first - carrying around a laptop allows me to progress my jobs wherever and whenever I want. In the past when I have had a laptop, it has either been too big to be convenient or I never let it enter sleep and shut it down instead. Now, being only 7" and in sleep it still has a 12 hour battery life, I have no anxiety about doing that at all. I find when I think of something at a minimum I can write it down in a text file. So handy.

The second - bringing my to do list home was a great idea. I try not to progress work at home but I write down my personal jobs/goals as well, such as order a USB hub or contact Cam. This way I only have to run one to do list, and I can mind sweep constantly so I don't either keep forgetting to do things or keep two sheets going at once. I have been just writing these on a4 sheets of pages but maybe I should shift to a notebook.

Took my son for a walk yesterday afternoon - I have a large backpack that is designed for him to sit in, so it's basically like walking around with a giant backpack (well, at least for now until he gets much bigger). I felt good afterwards, it was a lot of fun to get out of the house rather than him stare at screens (which I don't want him to do), and it made me realise I am ready to get back out running again. I rested for longer this time after the marathon, now 8 days instead of 4, so I am keen to get back out there. Still haven't looked at ultra trail training plans but have made a plan with my wife to go camping next weekend near a hiking trail that I can jog around for a few hours to get used to the uneven surface and environment. I am looking forward to it.

Work is going to suck today, I just know it. Not the right attitude to have, so need to have a shakeup before I head in.

Edited by giblets

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02 Nov 17

Days to Ultra-Trail: 193

Days until I graduate: ~354

Days to next run: 73 @ Hobart (but possibly sooner)

Alright I'm back. Definitely need to start incorporating this back into my morning routine, regardless of how busy I am going to be. Losing the ability to mind sweep over the last 9 days definitely impacted how I set myself up for the day. So naturally I have lots to talk about after 9 days, not sure if I will put it all in here or whether it will be split across the next couple of days.

Firstly, one of the main reasons I haven't been on is I have gone off the rail a little bit as a "lashing out" towards having to work so much the previous few weeks. I was a bit angry with it all (not sure if I had justification to do it or not), but as a result I subconsciously started avoiding doing anything constructive and avoiding my computer. Noting I really don't like writing on my phone (or try to avoid it now after the detox), that meant I really limited my options with the journal writing. I think I would have stayed "off the rail" if I didn't sit down and look at how much the year has left and how much I still want to achieve, which jolted me back into action. There is only about six weeks left of work to go, and I have so many projects (professional and personal) that I really want to try and achieve. I can thank my second in charge at work for making me realise this, otherwise who knows when I would of come back. It did impact my studies towards the end, as I needed to make several more online posts to add to a reflective journal, and they just flat out did not happen. I am hoping the fact that I rebuilt my distinction average will be enough to get me across the line. Not ideal, but definitely some learning points.

Second - I have sat down and mapped out how I want my running to continue, and one of those was trying to identify when my next run is going to be. At this stage it looks like it is going to be the Hobart Marathon in January. I decided after my friend asking to do it with them I needed to step up to the plate and get on with it. I am determined to get under the 4h30 mark now, I have managed to turn the disappointment around to motivation to keep running. I have also set an "unofficial" goal of trying to do a marathon in every city here in Australia as encouragement for my family to get back travelling again and out of this rut of sitting at home on the weekends and only venturing out to shops to waste money. That should be a lot of fun. I have found a marathon to do in a new place every six to eight weeks right up to when I move next year (though I will need to see how I go after the Ultra-trail).

Third - I have finally got my diet/nutrition on track. The first two days of this week I headed down to Canberra for a symposium on electronic and blended learning, and I took that as an opportunity to sort my diet out. Well, when I say I took that as an opportunity, I was suffering massive stomach cramps at the time which was making life very difficult so my hand was forced. So, I have taken the step of cutting out gluten from my diet completely. I know I should contemplate or give paleo a try as well, but baby steps. Anyway, after only 24 hours of being gluten free I feel a lot more mentally agile. I don't have the glimpses of "mental fog" or boughts of memory loss/anxiety that I have grown accustomed to. I also felt less physically bloated/fat/slowed down. Now this could be a placebo, but it is working for now so I am going to exploit it. As a result of not having mental fog (no matter what level or severity of it), I feel a lot more self confident talking to people, including public speaking, which I managed to do yesterday to a high level of success. This new found self confidence, while it lasts, should help me put anxiety on the ropes.

Lastly (or at least for today) - I have changed quite a few things for when I am trying to be uber productive. I minimise or shut out as many distractions as I can, such as my phone, any tabs, any phone calls, people visiting my office, etc. My aim to do this was that if I am less inclined to be distracted, then I wouldn't have to go through that ~22 minutes to refocusing every single time to get back into my flow state. As a result I have been checking the forums less during the day, ignoring notifications on my phone, and setting my status to DnD at work. The end result has (or I think it has) allowed me to be more productive during the day so I can spend more time with my family after hours instead of working so long.

Oh! I can't forget - I am back on twitter. I have a new intent this time around, I am curating who I am following much more aggressively. I only want to see things or tweet that add value, whether that be news, current affairs, great inspirational quotes, etc. Gone are anyone (as it seems to be anyone rather than any organisation or group) who does not tweet with similar intent. Instead of giving them the "benefit of the doubt" when I see their first tweet which doesn't value add, I cut them straight away. I might have to consider rolling this out to my podcast queue as well, which has now reached 70 shows. I do find myself not really listening to podcasts as much in the last two weeks anyway, I have shifted more towards either audiobooks or listening to soundwaves that are supposed to make you more focused.

Grateful corner

1. People who force you to take in the wider picture, such as what needs to be achieved and what your actions are going to be, or just tell you to stop and smell the roses. Generally people are so focused on pigeonholing or siloing themselves that they either don't see the bigger picture (of work, of life, of themselves) or don't care about contributing to others.

2. The amount of gluten-free resources that are available online. You have to sift through some of them to be useful but if you start generating your own guide you will be surprised how easy it can be with the amount of information out there. The amount of stores that accomodate gluten free is also something to be grateful for.

3. Spending time with old friends. Comparing their perspectives on life to what it was 10 years ago is very powerful. I have definitely learned quite a lot from them doing this, and have a few things to do over the next week as a result.

Battleplan for today

1. Do some market research on home loans. I don't need any action yet (and may not have the time to), but it is time to start looking around and seeing what the options are out there.

2. Investigate options for an electronic to-do list on Linux. The portability of my laptop is beginning to outweigh carrying around a clipboard where I write my notes on it and my physical to do list. I will just need to mitigate the advantages it has by setting aside 30 minutes each morning to mind sweep/curate the lists for the day.

3. Go for a run. I have only run once since the Melbourne marathon due to a combination of trying to rest, working too much, and being sick. Time to put that all behind me and get back out there and hit the pavement. Doesn't have to be a long run for the first hit out, I just need to force my body to get back into that routine, especially when we are looking at less than 200 days to go to the ultra-trail now, and I have not started following a training plan yet.

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03 Nov 17

Days to Ultra-Trail: 192

Days until I graduate: ~353

Days to next run: 72 @ Hobart (but possibly Bowral in December)

Yesterday was really productive. I managed to change my DNS on my laptop to FreeDNS (those frequent readers will know I am paranoid about big brother), which worked after the change, but then stopped working since then, so I am back to the drawing board on that one. I also did some research on to do lists or task managers on linux that I could use (there are extended periods that I go without internet so online options don't work), I tried a couple out but they don't really cut the mustard. Will hopefully try another one or two this morning, as I need a reliable one, I forgot to finish off some work again last night. Ended up just pottering around the house doing chores, which is good I am happy I was being constructive instead of just wasting my night playing games, but I did need to do a spot of work. I'll crack on and try to get it finished this morning.

Part of needing to transcribe my notes to my laptop is I know I wrote down there is another marathon in December, which correlates with one every six weeks. I did finally get back out running yesterday which is the second time since the Melbourne marathon which I was happy about. I only ended up doing 3km in sprints around my neighbourhood as I was a bit short of time as I left it too late, but I felt really good, and I feel really good this morning. Contemplating starting to force myself to run in the morning, especially when I develop my training plan for the ultra-trail, as I will start need to doing really long runs.

Feeling good about today. I was going to get out of Sydney this weekend and hit the Blue Mountains, but the weather isn't forecast to be really good, so it might be yet another weekend stuck at home. Aim will be to keep chipping away at my to do list so I don't get frustrated over this. It all starts with the miracle mornings, I need to bed that down.

Grateful corner

1. Leftovers. I love eating leftovers for lunch. Some of it actually tastes a lot better the day after in my opinion!

2. Proxies. I am going to have to use these until I can work out my DNS problem/glitch. There are a lot of free ones online that are very secure.

3. My brain getting onboard with doing regular journal entries again. Lets keep it up for 3 days in a row.

Battleplan for today

1. Run for second day in a row.

2. Try to hunt down some gluten free beer. Otherwise, no beer for you, and it's a Friday.

3. Try a few more productivity apps.  The three yesterday were meh.

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04 Nov 17

Days to Ultra-Trail: 191

Days until I graduate: ~352

Days to next run: 71 @ Hobart (but possibly Bowral in December)

Yesterday was great again. I spent a few hours in the morning fiddling around with some productivity software on my laptop. I settled on a to-do manager (Task Coach) and also discovered a journalling app (RedNotebook) and trialled some Evernote alternatives (WizNote).... and then didn't realise that I needed to save my list to a file rather than keep it just in the program, so have lost my giant to-do list. Damn. And I have already shredded my physical to do list. Oh well. I guess I need to look at it in a positive light - next week I'll be starting with a basically clean slate!

I didn't go for a run and I drank gluten beer, so the day wasn't perfect. One of my friends I have been spending a lot of time talking to about staying positive, prioritising issues and meditation has finally started to take this onboard, so that has been refreshing.

The Asian Efficiency podcast today mentioned that my journal should be shaping big tasks I need to attack and priortise what I want to achieve, which I haven't really been using it for. I need to do some reflecting on how I will do that with it still focusing on being able to mindsweep.

Grateful corner

1. This weather. It's about 15 degrees, slightly drizzling, slight breeze, and no direct sunlight. Absolutely perfect. I look forward to getting out there and enjoying it today. I am a bit disappointed that we are not camping like we planned this weekend, it would be so much fun. Let's just hope this weather persists for another weekend we can do it (or if we decide to go tonight in the end).

2. Online radio streaming services. I managed to listen to NFL Thursday night football yesterday while working. It ended up being a blow out but that is the closest I am coming to watching a game right now! I need to check out if there is some basketball online this weekend.

3. Friends being receptive. It makes me feel less like I am being a broken record! And also makes me feel like I am on the right path of personal development if they can see enough value in what I am doing to shift their life as well.

Battleplan for today

1. Go for an extended run today.

2. Rebuild my to do list.

3. Work on an RPi project today. Probably replacing the noisy fan on my desk for a quite one.

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05 Nov 17

Days to Ultra-Trail: 190

Days until I graduate: ~351

Days to next run: 70 @ Hobart (but possibly Bowral in December)

Days to Cam & Adam's show in Sydney: 9

It's hard to work out whether I just don't like my weekends (again), or if it is the "Sunday blues". I'd prefer it would be the latter as that might be easier to solve but I'm not so sure. I am a bit frustrated about some stuff that went down today but not sure if I want to talk about it. The big difference between doing the journal entry at night is that it's far more reflective rather than helping to outline a battle plan for the day, which I think I prefer. I respond better having a very focused and sharpened plan or schedule of how I want the day to go - I can only assume this must be the onus from the Miracle Morning, so that you feel more motivated or on the front foot for the remainder of the day after mapping out your big targets or plans.

I have been using RedNotebook the last few days to copy across my journal entries and I really like the idea. It is such a powerful platform to be able to flick quickly through my entries and see if there is any common trends about things I am being vexed by, or whether I keep avoiding getting on with tasks. I'll keep my eye on this and should set aside maybe some time every week to reflect on those entries. Or month or year.

Next few weeks are going to be a whirlwind again, but this time I wont let my habits or journals slip, and I have my laptop to thank for that. I'll still work on my journal and my other streaks, even if it is offline, to keep my momentum going.

Went for another run. Back up to 10km and pushing myself to go longer without walking which is great, thats what I was doing previously, just not with hard intervals now. I feel like I need to transition from intervals to running longer and longer distances, so I think I am going to move on from the interval model. Not sure if that is the right thing or not, but I am going to try it anyway, and see how it works for me.

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06 Nov 17

Days to Ultra-Trail: 189

Days until I graduate: ~350

Days to next run: 69 @ Hobart (but possibly Bowral in December)

Days to Cam & Adam's show in Sydney: 8

Alright here we go week, time for this to be a really good week, and having great mornings to set myself up for success during the day. I was contemplating forcing myself to run this morning, to ignore this "oh but I'm not a morning person", or "but I'll just be going through the motions" thoughts, but boy the weather in Sydney today is HORRIBLE. It's been raining all night, it's still drizzling now, and there is quite a strong wind. Is this an excuse? Probably. Could I still run in this weather? Of course. Would I enjoy it? No way. Plus with the amount of times I've been sick in the last few weeks, I don't really want to tempt fate. Let the gluten free diet take hold a bit longer then start thinking I'm superman. Speaking of which though, it's time to start getting serious about the training plan for the ultra-trail. No more just running 10km or not having targets I should be meeting. It's six months away, that's how much time I needed to get myself in shape for the marathon, and even then it wasn't really in shape as I took 5 hours. A friend of mine completed an Iron Man yesterday, very impressive! Maybe that's the next target after I complete the ultra-trail? The biggest challenge will be the swimming, I am confident in my swimming ability, but I have never swum that far or for that extended period of time. It would take a lot of training. Maybe if I can look at one towards the end of next year so I would have recovered from the ultra-trail and still have some kind of fitness from it.

Just ordered a new phone. Have been trying to avoid the yearly upgrade cycle that we seem to be locked into, but my paranoia with g-oogle has no bounds it seems. I really want a phone without an account with them. Not sure if I will be able to achieve it while still running android (it's frightening how many things use play services), but I will give it a try. I know I'll be annoyed later with myself not being able to achieve more than one year on one phone, but I have also been contemplating splitting what I need to use the phone for across two devices. For example, using this old phone as a running tracker/maps device, and the new phone as my podcasts/audiobooks player. That might alleviate some frustration I have with it crashing when I have too many apps running at once.

So what are the big ticket items for today.... maybe my tax. I think I have cleared a lot of my personal tasks or goals, so getting through my tax returns might be a good one.

Grateful corner

1. Open source community. I thank these guys often but until I work out how to contribute to them, that's all I can do.

2. My wife really helping out with going gluten free and adjusting our diet. I think there is still a bit more work to do but I am on the right path. I am sure there are relationships that are far less supportive out there.

3. Being able to work inside today in this weather! Never thought I would say I am thankful for being in an office, ever :D

Battleplan for today

1. Find an ultra-trail training plan! Quit procrastinating on this pal! You're not taking it seriously!

2. Do some work on my taxes. Long overdue, used to hide behind games so I didn't have to focus on it, but I need to get this sorted. The government are getting interest free loans from me man! I could be making that money work for me.

3. Do some reading on Xposed modules. While I think my to do list is low (maybe as a by product from losing it! haha) then take this opportunity to educate myself on some of the intricate things I can do when the new phone arrives.

 

[Edit]

Ha! Reading some material and found a few funny one liners that are so true -

For several days (5-10) you'll be on a mental high. Somewhere after 5-10 days, physically and mentally you may have a big letdown. Keep in mind that time will take care of your doldrums.

One sure-fire way to get the race behind you is to determine what your next race will be. This will divert your mental energies from the past and direct them towards the future.

When you finish your first ultra you'll feel like you've conquered the world. You will want to tell everyone how great you did. There is a tendency to think that you could not have run any faster . . . WRONG. Now that you know you can finish, you can work on improving your time (and you can if you desire). You can't rest on your laurels . . . determine other dreams to pursue.

Edited by giblets
reading training guides

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Showed Adam your countdown and he was stoked! Almost here bro. 

Looking forward to his show, should rock my world!

07 Nov 17

Days to Ultra-Trail: 188

Days until I graduate: ~349

Days to next run: 68 @ Hobart

Days to Cam & Adam's show in Sydney: 7

One week until Adam's Roa's show and the GQ meetup. Hopefully even though everyone else has gone quiet that they can find the time to come out for the afternoon. It should be a blast.

So now I am on my new training plan for the ultra-trail, today was a 45 minute run but because I am working until midnight, this morning was the only option I had to do the 45 minute high tempo run, but boy oh boy did I not wake up well. That's two days in a row of having a slamming headache and no energy as soon as I wake up. I can only assume I am dehydrated as I only had 2 glasses of water yesterday, so if I really want to get serious about this morning routine, I need to start drinking more and more water. I'll look into other areas that I could change for better mornings but that's a low hanging fruit. I'm at least happy that I am following a new routine which gives me a sense of purpose.

I have ruled out the Marathon in the Glass Mountains in December (16th to be precise). It starts at 4am! It's like 30 minutes drive from the nearest town, and I finish work on the 15th. So I can just see a train smash of comprised times and rushing from place to place with no sleep, with the end result being not enjoying the run at all. I am looking at other options, and keeping in mind that I need to get my legs conditioned to hiking, I have found the West Coaster in NZ on the 8th - https://www.thewestcoaster.co.nz/. Haven't registered yet but it is looking on the cards.

My phone has not shipped yet.... I hope it gets shipped today or I might have to call them! I get nervous of making big purchases and not being able to track it. Two days is reasonable right?

Have not touched my tax yet. So I think I have put so much focus on my morning routine and getting that aligned properly that I have not paid any attention to the late afternoon/evening routine after I put my son to bed. It has turned into having a cup of tea to relax (sometimes it can be difficult - parents you know that feel right), and then next thing you know I am getting ready for bed at 2130. I need to bring some discipline into that area - in my defense this is the first time I have become self aware of this even though it has been going on for a while. I think it's still a hangup from when I was "lashing out" from working so freaking much.

Grateful corner

1. Mates at work recognising I was really busy and brought me in some baked treats to eat yesterday morning. Although it was loaded with gluten I appreciate the gesture.

2. My hair clippers! It makes no sense to pay for a haircut with the so few hair follicles I have left, so I am grateful I have my own pair of clippers :D

3. Having the opportunity to see my son grow. It's quite an amazing process (or at least I think it is). I can only imagine how much it would suck to miss it.

Battleplan for today

1. Cut down on the amount of random searching I do on the internet. I think this is part of the reason I don't achieve as much as I should in the evenings, is part of my to do list is ideas or thoughts I have had throughout the day and write them down to search for later. That's all well and good but I think I need to bring some discipline in this area, maybe only allocate an hour or so that I can search for stuff, and then move onto the next project.

2. Integrate some work or something productive into my routine, I'll be in a 1hr on 1hr off routine today and I usually waste that hour off, so I would like to do something constructive with it, even if that is just clearing e-mails.

3. Haven't looked at my taxes yet, but I think my 3rd action item for today needs to be getting my heartrate monitor to work with my phone. It seems like a niche service so I see a few apps that make you pay for it, but I'll try and find a free one.

Edited by giblets

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10 Nov 17

Days to Ultra-Trail: 185

Days until I graduate: ~346

Days to next run: 65 @ Hobart

Days to Cam & Adam's show in Sydney: 4

So the last two days ended up being a lot more stressful than I thought and I had a lot less time than I thought. Nothing bad generally, just a lot of work and I think I allowed myself to get too much sleep, which apart from "burning daylight", meant I felt groggy all the time, which interestingly enough saps your energy rather than giving you more. I missed a couple of days training as well due to work but I did squeeze a 45minute run in yesterday as part of my new running program. I might be able to get another run in today if my wife comes home early, but I do need to look into stretching a bit more as I am having some tightness with my quads, which I don't want to prevent me from still training.

So the bad thing that happened over the last few days is me getting emotional again, mainly thinking about next year. I am going to have a big team changeout and the new guys coming in aren't exactly the A team, and I allowed it to start stressing and frustrating me. As a result, I started to lash out and let my emotions influence how I was acting at work, which of course always results in regret. Because I was working until midnight and couldn't escape, I was trying to think of ideas to help calm myself back down as soon as I became aware of this, and I tried some meditation with cognitive therapy (Mindroid). I think it worked really well, I am not sure if it was because of the stopping pausing and reflecting, the cognitive audio, or the buddhist chants I put over the top (which are also supposed to help with the tones they make deep in their throat), but in the end it worked. I used to do this a lot during the detox, I wonder why I have stopped this now. It has fallen by the wayside when I got a lot busier with work I guess. Time to start incorporating this back in my routine. I think I am going to do the hour breakdown of my days like a lot of the productivity tips have been talking about - it really puts into perspective what you are wasting your weeks on and what you can achieve. Anyway, as part of this I think it will make me allocate 30 minutes or so to meditating and using some cognitive therapy to help control my emotions. I might do 30 minutes in the morning and afternoon. Maybe I need to re-incorporate some Buddhist reading back into my routine as well, I have it as part of my habit tracker app, but I have to admit I have not checked it in a long time.

Long story short - I need to re-evaluate what I am doing with my time during the day and bring back in some techniques that were working during the detox.

Got the day off for Nov 14 when Cam and Adam are in town. Looking forward to the meetup if everyone is still keen - it seems like interest has dropped off from a few weeks ago. Because I have the whole day off, I am contemplating running into the city first thing in the morning which is about 25km, then showering and wander around until the meetup and then go to the show afterwards before catching the ferry home. Sounds like a sweet plan I think.

Did an absolutely stupid thing yesterday - I ate a pizza. Not too worried about the nutrition and deviating from my food plan for the ultra-trail, but the gluten is kicking my ass. I knew it was going too though, but I couldn't resist the pizza. I need to think of a new plan or control measures to stop me from voluntarily eating gluten, I'm my own worst enemy. The problem I find is the gluten free bread/pizza bases etc tastes so crappy and I love pizza etc so much. I need to come up with some creative ideas to stop myself from eating gluten and forcing myself to choose the salad etc instead. Need to do some more research on this (or just introduce some discipline!)

Grateful corner

1. Mindroid. Really useful app to help calm myself down. There is a free version but I paid the $2 for the premium version to unlock all the extra chants/melodies.

2. One of my friends who I lashed out to yesterday when I was letting my emotions control me again. They copped it sweet and after I apologised later they said no need to worry about it, I knew what you were doing. Fuck some people are amazing.

3. Weather is turning really good again - which means I can get out running early in the morning. If I drink more water during the day I should be able to capitalise on it.

Battleplan for today

1. I don't have much planned for today and I am not going to, noting that I am at home with my son looking after him, so it is going to revolve around him, which is great! This is the reason I gave up gaming in the first place, was so I could give him more attention without being annoyed, so I refuse to make a plan today so I don't get annoyed when it doesn't follow the script. Instead, lets just see where the day takes us! That can be some therapy in its own right I think.

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11 Nov 17

Days to Ultra-Trail: 184

Days until I graduate: ~345

Days to next run: 64 @ Hobart

Days to Cam & Adam's show in Sydney: 3

So today was interesting on a few different levels! Some weird noise went off next to my head at 3am. I swear it sounded like a phone vibrating or something similar, but my phone doesn't vibrate and was on the floor, so it puzzled me. You know that fright you get that makes your heart pound in the middle of the night, then you stare at the wall trying to figure out what the hell it was or if you were dreaming? Well that was me, for another hour. In the end I got up and channel surfed mindlessly (fitting in with the crowd now!), found a replay of the Eagles Broncos game, and watched that waiting for the sun to come up while I tinkered with my new phone. Trying to set it up without google is harder than I expected, and I don't think I went over the finer details properly. It's a fun challenge though, will take a little bit longer than expected. Haven't really given the phone a good hit out yet so not sure if it is living up to the hype or worth the extra cost, but time will tell. The shop attendant went total fanboy when I took it in to get a screen protector on it. It was hilarious, but then we shared that mutual "oh yeah we nerds" nod before I left.

I realised something else today too - I have totally been kidding myself with my training since the Sydney marathon. Once I finished the training program for the marathon, I decided to start going at my own pace and just keep getting out there chewing miles. But boy was I wrong. After some reading I did last week, I brought back in my interval training today, and based on the recommendation of those guides, I went 5:1, so 5 minutes running to 1 minute walking. The difference being that for the longer runs you want to sit at about 70%, but because it was only for an hour I went hard. Pushing yourself to keep going until you get the BEEP from the stopwatch can be hard work, and resultingly pushed myself harder than I have for quite a long time. Felt amazing afterwards.... well everyone did except for my hamstrings :D I'm hoping a new stretch routine will make that better.

Tomorrow should be good too. I suggested we go for a picnic and enjoy the nice weather somewhere new for my son to play about. So we're off to Manly. I'll get up early in the morning and make some lunch, then go for my long run (every Sunday with the new program), come back and head off to Manly for lunch and the afternoon. Should be a lot of fun, I haven't been out to Manly for several years I think. I have contemplated running into the city to Cam & Adam's show because that will be a solid 22-25km, but the logistics of showering and changing seems like a bit of a hurdle.... for now. I haven't given up on the idea, it just seems so fitting, that I would run a long way there, since the detox basically got me out running and is the prime reason why I was getting the motivation to do it, and it would put me squarely in the flow state ready to receive for the presentation. I have a few stones to turn over for the logistics piece so I haven't given up yet.

Grateful corner

1. APK Mirror & APK4Fun. Helping me set up my phone how I want it without big brother watching. It's helpful to archive the old apks for when the apps get taken down too, which I haven't prepared for in the past. And when something like Pebble is only a matter of time, was something I needed to do.

2. Gluten free beer - it was a) not as expensive as I was bracing myself for, and b) did not taste like ass as I was expecting.

3. Random "extra" free tv channels that replayed gridiron as a filler at the same time that I couldn't sleep.... made the best of a bad situation.

Battleplan / closest snapping alligator

1. Get up early, make some treats to take with us to Manly and do a picnic, old-school style.

2. Get a run in early. Tomorrow is 2 hours, slowly rebuilding my long runs up to 6-7 hours gradually over a couple of months. Need to get this out of the way early so I don't impact the plans to go have a nice picnic. Have contemplated just running one way and catching the bus back or getting my wife to drop me off somewhere and run home as extra incentive, but maybe too short notice to try and implement tomorrow.

3. Finish tweaking the new phone.

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12 Nov 17

Days to Ultra-Trail: 183

Days until I graduate: ~344

Days to next run: 63 @ Hobart

Days to Cam & Adam's show in Sydney: 2

This new running routine/program is the shock to the system that I really needed I think. I am fully aware that eventually I'll get over running for one reason or another, whether that be injury or boredom, but while I am in this phase I want to exploit it for all its worth. I felt like I was already drawing to the boredom stage since the Melbourne marathon, I hadn't followed a training program since the first marathon and the anger in my belly for my bad timing wasn't there anymore, just disappointment. Which made it even harder to get me to focus on the ultra-trail next year, going into that after not training could be fatal. But, today was the second time I had a hit out of the 5:1 routine, and I feel great. It really pushes me to go harder and get fitter, and it breaks down your run from being 60 minutes into bite sized chunks that you can focus on and work towards. When you think about it, that's how we effectively battle life as well, instead of getting overwhelmed or anxious about how much we need to do or accomplish, we break it down into small steps that are easy to mark off in the to do list and give us a feeling of momentum.

I know I'm back to pushing myself while running because my hamstrings are getting quite tight again, so I am super happy about that. Tomorrow is a rest day and then Tuesday Adam & Cam are in town and I am still contemplating the long run into the city option.

Today was fantastic - got my run in early like I wanted to, then headed over to Manly and found a nice quiet park for a picnic, which also happened to have quite an epic playground next to it for my boy to play around and go crazy. I saw a guy cruising along the beach in a boat selling ice creams - such an ingenious idea on a day like today. Some people have some creative ideas, and here I am struggling to decide whether I want to put my left or right shoe on first... (just kidding, it's always the left).

Definitely doing the West Coaster in Auckland - haven't got any responses to see if anyone else is interested in attending, so I'll just go it solo again. I'll add it to the counter list tomorrow after I register. Hopefully it isn't too expensive.

Grateful corner

1. This article. It is the kick start I needed for my training after the Melbourne marathon, and introduced me to the 5:1 concept.

2. The weather again, so great today, facilitated some family time out of the house and not at a mall/supermarket, which is what we really needed I think.

3. That it is only 2 days until the Permission to think Freely show! Hopefully there will be a turnout of GQs there.

4. The back button on my browser from saving this post after my fat fingers clicked on something again, phew!

Battleplan / closest snapping alligator

1. Keep working on the new phone, I accidentally wiped all the work I had done so far because I am an idiot with fat fingers. As I am going through this digital spring cleaning process I realised how many things I wanted to do on/with my old phone and never got around to it.... thanks for nothing, gaming.

2. Stay positive - tomorrow is going to have a few challenging conversations and I must not get emotional - incorporate cognitive therapy before/after I have them to stay tempered.

3. Book flights to Auckland and register for the West Coaster - here we come!

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Kudos to small steps, ice-cream boats and the aussie GQ Squad B| 

(I'm a right-footer myself, though I must say my running technique is utter garbage -_-)

Stay positive man, you can't choose how to feel but you always have the option on how to react. Everything that happens from the  outside of your brain to your skin is your domain. 

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13 Nov 17

Days to Ultra-Trail: 182

Days until I graduate: ~343

Days to next run: 26 @ Auckland // 62 @ Hobart

Days to Cam & Adam's show in Sydney: Tomorrowwww

Cheers @Hitaru! Still don't know why I can't tag anymore but hope you get my gratitude anyway.

It's difficult switching from an afternoon/evening post back into the morning ones, but unless I do a morning post during the week I don't do one at all, and my mornings on weekends have been all over the place. I seem to go through phases of having my weekends organised/sorted, and then phases where they are chaos. The silver lining is I came away from this weekend without having the "I've wasted it and achieved nothing" feeling, which is great. I think that is the case because of a combination of the training plan, dedicating one day to just spending with the family, and doing my best to focus on chores at home rather than mindless browsing.

So, lets focus on a way ahead as there is not much reflecting to be done. Today I really want to get my hands dirty on creating a planner for each hour of the day. I think it could really boost my productivity by forcing me to focus on tasks rather than either being distracted, by multi tasking, or by taking my time. I didn't really decide how to do that, but I will look into a combination of a spreadsheet and calendar. I thought a spreadsheet because a calendar would be difficult to "copy and paste" every week, but I would prefer that method because then people at work could see I was "busy" and focus upon what times I give them to chat etc - I'll come up with a system.

Big ticket item for today - need to find out somewhere that I can shower and change in the city if my tomorrow plan is going to come to fruition.

Oh and the West Coaster was $110... what do they think I am made of, gold? :D

Grateful corner

1. Ad Away. Fantastic app and I am noticing the difference already - I can't believe I lived without this for a year! What was I thinking?

2. Firefox Rocket. I found this by accident while searching for Firefox Focus on APKMirror, and boy is it great! Super quick, faster than Firefox Focus for sure, and it claims to block trackers as well but I am not so sure as one particular website remembers my settings.

3. Hay fever tablets. Whoever invented these is a saint.

Battleplan / closest snapping alligator

1. Build an hour spreadsheet to plan my weeks with. There is 168 hours a week and I don't think I am using them to my full potential.

2. Use my calendar more to reflect my movements as per #1, to try and influence how many people disturb me during the day.

3. Think about what to do with all the photos on my phone. There is about 3000... I really don't need that many, but I don't want to delete a lot of them either. Maybe a more organised folder system for them would be the trick.

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19 Nov 17

Days to Ultra-Trail: 176

Days until I graduate: ~337

Days to next run: 20 @ Auckland // 56 @ Hobart

@Hitaru Works now! I assume you have already checked into seeing whether those glitches had anything to do with the server downtime?

So the day the server first went down was the day of Cam & Adam's show here in Sydney. Was a lot of fun - managed to get the day off, so I went for a run with a mate for an hour in the morning before he had to get to work, then I went and watched my son at his swimming lesson. I skipped breakfast so I could go watch him so ended up going and trying to eat my weight at a sushi train afterwards. Sushi trains are such a trick! All this food racing past you and you want to eat them all, and I tend to give it a try. I guess the silver lining in the cloud is that it is relatively cheap compared to a lot of other fast food, and it is very easy for me to find gluten free dishes. Afterwards I went and found a bar near the venue for the show and watched Monday Night Football, which is more like Tuesday Morning Football down under, before having some more sushi with Cam and Adam and the team. It was great to talk to Cam and meet Adam and his crew, they were very welcoming. The show was great too - @SlackRamen ended up coming so it was good to talk to him and catch up on how he has been going lately, which has been well! I got a selfie of both of us with Cam which I'll try to upload later. Adam was a very passionate and professional performer, it was great to watch.

Since then I have been quite busy - which is good and bad. It's good because I feel like I am achieving a lot of stuff, but bad as it means I need to get better with my productivity and time management skills which I have talked about recently is slipping, or at least no longer at the level that I am happy with. I have migrated to an electronic to do list, re-introduced closing my inbox at lunch time, and setting my phone to do no disturb mode or putting it in the bedroom when I get home - which is pretty much needed now because of my battery. So the new phone has a USB C connector, and because I only have one cable which I have left at home so I can't charge at the office, by the time I get home it is down to about 20-30%. I might keep this routine though, because it means I am not getting distracted by it. I still have not progressed a program to look at what I am doing hour by hour, but I have started doing it retrospectively in my work calendar so I can at least manually look at it at the end of the week to see how I am going. I will endeavour to make it a priority this week - my concern is not really what time I am wasting or doing on the weekends, but actually during the week; which is a total flip from my previous concerns. I am finding that even though I finish work at 4 or 5, I don't really achieve much after work and before I know it I am falling asleep at 9. At a bare minimum, the hour spreadsheet will shock me into paying attention to what I am either wasting my time on, or it will make me realise I am achieving things so I can stop being so hard on myself - essentially the same as what I did with my weekends.

I hit the wall while running today for the first time ever, and I am quite disappointed about it. As part of my training plan I needed to run for 105 minutes, and at around the 85 minute mark I just crashed. I could not will myself to keep going. I am trying to break down why this happened, as I need to eliminate the chance that this will happen during one of the races, and I keep coming back to thinking I was dehydrated. I haven't drunk a lot of water in the last 48 hours due to drinking pretty much all of it in the house (sparkling and bottled), and because I hate sugar my energies might be quite low as well. So I need to pay more attention to my diet, even though I have written a plan I haven't really followed it yet (apart from removing gluten), drink more water, and try to get some electrolytes that I am actually going to drink - so maybe some sugar free ones (and not just the "sugar substitute" ones - they are not much better at all). Having only 20 days until the next marathon, I need to sort this out quickly in case it needs to be shipped from overseas.

Where does everyone get their audio books from? Is there some good alternatives to the $15 a month for Audible?

Grateful corner

1. GPodder. I have discovered this service as part of the transition between phones. Even though I lost the stats of hours listened from my old phone (1700 hours), this service should keep track of my podcasts, and encourages me to look at alternatives to iTunes.

2. Staying calm and emotion-free towards the back end of last week. Had a quick chat to my boss and he mentioned how it was helpful that my team was staying level headed and focused on the task at hand rather than blowing up over small issues, which is what he was dealing with everywhere else.

3. Sticking to my routine that I established during the detox, I can use this to my advantage now of wanting to go to bed early and get up early with a plan to attack the day. Just need to fix my water intake to improve this.

Battleplan / closest snapping alligator

1. Start the framework for the hour-calendar. I'll wind it back from constructing something complete to just start building it; that might be all I get this week as it will be another hectic week (but not stressful!)

2. Clean my desk. Cluttered desk, cluttered mind. Get some order going on in here.

3. Reach out to @SlackRamen and @Moe Smith and see how they are going this week.

Edited by giblets

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Quote

@Hitaru Works now! I assume you have already checked into seeing whether those glitches had anything to do with the server downtime?

Not sure, since the server was changed to another... thing, maybe the quotes work better in this... thing. There was certainly the work of our glorious programmers involved of course. I'm a programming potato so my knowledge on this is very limited. 

Awesome to hear about the meeting, I'm sure it was tons of fun. And don't worry about your running man, bad flukes happen now and then. You're a two-legged beast man! B|

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For time management check out something called "Parkinson's Law"

"A task always expands to fill the time it is alotted to it"

You will be less effective if you don't put a time limit on your tasks. If you give yourself the freedom to take as long as you need, that may well mean procrastination.

->Cap the time on your asks. Get a sense of urgency in. I need to work on this too.

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23 Nov 17

Days to Ultra-Trail: 172

Days until I graduate: ~333

Days to next run: 16 @ Auckland // 52 @ Hobart

Roger thing, thing and the other thing, @Hitaru :D

That would be true, @thehondasc00py, if I had commenced it with no deadline. Parkinson's Law abuser are procrastinators. I had not prioritized the task at all, we all say we don't have time or we are too busy, but that's all mumbo jumbo for we did not prioritise a task. Time limits is the whole point of the planner I want to make, inspired by GTD. Putting how many hours you have in a week and how many is wasted into perspective is very sobering.

Anyway, I have finally made a framework of what I was visualising to sharpen my productivity, attached. I am thinking the best way to approach it is to use next week as an "observation" and see where my hours go. That will give me a baseline to work from, and noting that next week will return to "normal" working, which I will maintain for the rest of the week, it will be good. I am curious to see the numbers add up and see how many hours are wasted on garbage. I'd like to maybe consider clawing back my hours sleeping to 6.5 per day; I've tried 6 per day but it is not enough so I jumped to 7 without trialling 6.5. Next week is a good opportunity to try that.

The last few days have been intense, and I didn't realise how tired I was until last night when I almost went into a zombie like state. You know when you wake up and it feels like you have been hibernating for the winter? That sleepy. Thankfully it is all downhill from here and should be relaxing but still hard work for the remainder of the year, which allow me to focus upon my running schedule.

I did still do journal entries the last few days while I have been offline and saving them in RedNotebook. I was going to post it here but don't really have time now so I will skip it this time.

Going camping this weekend up to the blue mountains, so should be a blast. I can't wait to get out of the city, I really have needed to for a long time, but have made up excuses or other reasons why not to go. I am excited but I know I am underprepared, I don't have half the equipment I need, but limitation fuels creativity.

Grateful corner

1. Loyal Books. I haven't tried it out yet but it looks promising.

2. Talking to Cam. Really empowering.

3. This weather, facilitating me finally going camping for a few days, even if all I do is sit out in the scrub and read a book with a glass of wine.

Battleplan / closest snapping alligator

1. Complete some notes for my new boss before the end of the day.

2. Provide some counselling for my team with the overarching aim to step back more and let them be more autonomous.

3. Go for a run in the morning. Need to shift my routine to the morning, and I need to force myself to do it even if I complain or throw hurdles in my way mentally.

Screenshot from 2017-11-23 20-24-50.png

Edited by giblets
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27 Nov 17

Days to Ultra-Trail: 168

Days until I graduate: ~329

Days to next run: 12 @ Auckland // 48 @ Hobart

So the gaps between my journalling are starting to blow out again - I need to reel that back in. The reason that there is a big gap from my last post is I went totally off the grid for the weekend and went camping. Was great, learnt a lot, stressed out a lot, and here I am back again. While I could have maintained my journal in RedNotebook, I didn't, and in hindsight, I really should of. Mindsweeping in the morning while sitting around the campfire may have been the best thing for my mental health.

Today I took a day off to watch football with a mate, turns out the mate didn't show but I still watched football anyway for pretty much the whole day, interlaced with so many chores around the house. We have so much stuff, and that was the source of my stress on the weekend, with the amount of stuff my wife packed that I then needed to carry to the camp site and back again. Having so much stuff really weighs down my mind and makes me feel less agile. It also means it's all over the floor and table and makes the place look like a squalor. No matter how many times I have talked about thinning out some of our stuff, I don't get anywhere with the wife. The Minimalist podcast talks about this a lot, and they basically say if you stick to your values and be an example then people will fall in line and follow you. I assume some paths are longer than others, but I don't see any budge with my family. Every time we have a clean out or spring cleaning, all that results is my stuff being sold or thrown out. I am pretty sure I could fit everything I have now in 2 or 3 boxes, max.

I have edited my planner to break my day down to 30 minute blocks. I have updated the day as best as I could as I go along, not really sure right now how this is going to shape my planner for upcoming weeks, but it is least a start to capture data points of what I am spending my 168 hours on. I am enjoying looking at it in the notion of 168 hours, rather than 7 days or 1 week, because it makes me realise how much time there is every week - it is far more than everyone indicates. "I didn't have enough time" or "I am running out of time" as excuses to not do things directly translates into "I didn't prioritise it". Now whether you prioritise doing nothing or watching TV over working on personal projects or doing the chores, it's still prioritisation, we all have the same amount of time during the week.

Loyal Books is good so far, I have had to tweak a few things and I need to work out why the next chapters are not starting automatically which is a bit annoying while I was running.

Plan for the rest of the week.... not really sure. I think my main task, apart from the obvious work tasks, is to identify some areas that I can improve upon to continue to round out my leadership and emotional interactions with people. I undertook a personality test earlier this year with work and got the results last week, and while the results overall aren't that interesting/exciting, the materials they provided does look helpful - gives you examples of some destructive behaviour and some simple ways of influencing that. I am a bit excited about trying to work on it and using it as a foundation to do some work with Cam, which is good, I felt like a ship lost at sea with my professional development since university finished for the year.

Also throw more stuff out.

Grateful corner

1. The opportunity to go camping - reminded me how much fun it was. Haven't done it for years.

2. Good friends - the ones that even if you haven't caught up with them for a while they can still make you laugh and slot right in as if you had seen them yesterday.

3. Bars being open during the day :D

Battleplan / closest snapping alligator

1. Throw more stuff out. Pack up the spare bedroom.

2. Set up my media box in the spare bedroom.

3. Allocate some time to read the handbook on my personality quiz thingo to look for some small changes that would be fun and productive to implement.

Screenshot from 2017-11-27 21-51-54.png

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