26 May 17 Game Free: 39 (17 Apr) Alright, last day before Vegas. I feel a little bit more organised but still not excited. Maybe I will get excited when I go through customs. I still am a bit depressed/flat and I can't seem to pinpoint why - I can only really put it down to how unproductive I have been this week and how none of my projects have really had any progress. Work has been a bit crazy and meh at the same time. Maybe it's a combination of all of the above. I can solve the productivity piece by "sitting with it", but I am not sure how to solve the other two. Maybe the break is what I need to pause and recenter. Have a few books for the plane and of course a lot of study to do, as well as I am planning to sleep as much as I can. I think that should be enough to keep myself occupied for the trip. See how I go. Not sure how/if/when I will continue my journal entries during my travels, but I will do my best. There wont be as much content but I should maintain the habit, and I could at least document if I am feeling a bit better. Preoccupation is being a challenge again - this time it is about my failed RPi project. Can't shake it and focus on something else. Maybe I should do some research on how to overcome preoccupation in general, not just with games.
25 May 17 Game Free: 38 (17 Apr) I really don't have much to add today, I have been so busy with work. The good news I guess is I feel a bit more productive and upbeat than I have all week, but the bad news is I still haven't had the progress on my study like I have wanted to. I saw someone today who said "How do you balance your study with your work? You're crazy." It made me laugh and put what I am trying to achieve in perspective - but I do need to try harder. I have officially abandoned my RPi laptop project - there is not enough space in the Droid Lapdock to mount it, even with all the modifications I have done to the case, and when I was thinking about putting it inside of an Eee Pc 900 case, I can't find any screens that are a suitable size. I did waste some time this afternoon looking on eBay and Gumtree for netbooks etc that I could get on the cheap but nothing that either I want or that are nearby that I can pick up. Depresses me a little bit. I am not feeling overly positive this week and I think this is a contributing factor - but I must keep plugging on. I did break my Resilio server today when I tried to change some settings to get it to boot - so now it doesn't work at all and I have no idea how to fix it. Oh well. It was fantastic while it lasted, I don't want to waste any more time bumbling around in the dark with it right now. The only goal I had for today was to survive work and not look like an idiot - I think I managed that relatively well, I am feeling more and more like myself again and not seeing the social barriers that I had been battling with for the last 18 months. Study has stagnated.
What did you build it into? I am searching high and low on how to make a portable RPi. I have tried building one into a Droid Lapdock, but there isn't enough space. I am currently contemplating either building it into a shell of an Eee Pc 900 or just using the official HDMI case and taping a battery to the back. There are pros and cons for each; the con for the Eee Pc 900 plan is I can't find either a HDMI/composite screen that size, or a driver board for the current screen; the con for the tablet plan is I won't be able to type on it.
Thanks mate! I am a bit scared to be honest with the flight and trying not to play games. This will be the first time I have tried it. The other international flights I have done (the last one about 18 months ago) I did have some emulators on my phone. Admittedly I don't think I played them very much as I got bored and I did other things, but it was a security blanket to have them there, which I don't have this time. Part of my brain keeps thinking "it's ok, you are allowed to play some games on the plane, people would understand, everyone else will be doing it" but I don't want to give in. I am going to fight it. My solution so far is to charge up my kindle and load up some books I have been meaning to read for years but never got around to it because I was gaming instead, some audiobooks I downloaded before cancelling my audible account, catch up on podcasts, and I do still have some study I need to do so I will force myself to work on that on the plane. And of course there is to get lots of sleep to minimise the jetlag. I'll see how all those go. I'll keep the puzzle idea in mind, the only real puzzles I enjoy these days are pixel puzzles, and they tend to be a bit hard to find. 24 May 17 Game Free: 37 (17 Apr) Well the above paragraph pretty much covered off what is on my mind yesterday/today. I did not waste time on retroachievements which is good, but I still can't shake the feeling that I have picked up this week of being unhappy with not being as productive as I would like to be. I didn't get any study done yesterday again, which is bad, I was focused on sorting out some stuff for vegas instead, and trying to shift my calendar from Google. Both those tasks are done now, but it is worrying with how little study I have completed because it means I am going to have to do some study in the US - and I really don't see that happening! I am just going to have to force myself to sit with it, at least an hour or two a day anyway. Just get some momentum on it. Got a lot done at work though which I guess is good, or at least would be good if there wasn't so much to do there since so many people before me did absolutely nothing. Well, that's a bit mean, they probably did some stuff, I just can't find where it is. I finished modifying the HDMI/USB flap on my RPi laptop and got really excited that I was almost finished, so wanted to keep pushing on to work on it some more last night with the notion of being able to take it with me on the trip next week. This was part of the reason I didn't study. Unfortunately I had forgotten about needing to modify the screen to fit the cables in as well - so still a few hours of work to go. I'll do another some more during lunch today, but I will have to force myself to not do any after work so I study. Achieved 2 out of 3 goals from yesterday, the one that fell by the wayside was the study one again. I need to fix that. Today is the day. Today's Goals: Complete 1 hour of study, right after putting my son to bed.Only spend 1 hour tinkering on the RPi laptop - cutting the screen to fit the HDMI/USB cables.Move contacts from Google.
Welcome back Moe! I was wondering yesterday where you had gone and was hoping you hadn't just done a handful of days then given up. For starters, lets clear something up, I'm a Nets fan, so the fact you got to the playoffs is one up on me! I don't see us getting back to the playoffs anytime soon (enjoy our #1 pick Boston.... sheesh) I don't think the 20 days are a waste and I don't want you to think that way. I got to 22 days before Easter before I broke. I learnt so much from that though and it put a lot of things in perspective for me, and I think I have been more productive afterwards (though I think this has tapered off lately). I am sure you learnt and achieved or gained something in your 20 days that will make your next attempt better (if you want to attempt it again). Games aren't bad - its just whether you can keep it to a moderate level. I can't do anything to a moderate level so I will always struggle with it, but your situation might be different. The only way to find out is maybe to experiment with your current break!
23 May 17 Game Free: 36 (17 Apr) Spending way too much time again on retroachievements. Just reading, searching, thinking about what SNES/NES games I used to play and what achievements they might have these days. It has to stop. So even though I felt confident to expand my daily goals out to 4, I didn't achieve one of them, which was my 1 hour of study, which I put down to my spare time was wasted on retroachievements. I need to force myself to not look at this site for at least a couple of days, so I can get my study back on track. It is a never ending battle of productivity versus mindlessly choosing entertainment. Feel feeling unwell. I think I need to get more sleep, or at least go back to sleeping in instead of getting up an hour before everyone else to get my admin out of the way, but my gut feeling is I don't want to do that. I like the hour to myself, with a cup of tea (note to self: all out of green tea, buy more tea), and going through my habit tracker doing my daily tasks. Still haven't incorporated any reading or working on my essay as soon as I wake up, but I am still happy with what I achieve. Way better than when I used to wake up early to check the auction house for World of Warcraft. How has that wasted time helped me now? Apart from lifting my wallet from $16 a month, which in the long run can run into the thousands (which I think I did). So remainder of the week - 100% productivity. No more wasting time. Only 3 days until I fly out and I am not organised. I am not sure what I am going to do on the plane without games this time though, usually I burn hours by playing games, but I don't want to take a single one this time. That's 14 odd hours on the plane without them.... I wonder how much of it I can sleep! If I had my raspberry pi laptop going I would tink for a few hours, but I don't see it happening. I got a lot of altering of the case done yesterday during my lunch hour, so it is possible I could have it ready, but I need mounting tape etc that I don't really want to waste time going to go buy. Today's Goals: Complete 1 hour of study. Maybe during my lunch hour.Keep tinkering a little bit on the RPi laptop - today modify the HDMI/USB flap so that it can be kept closed permanently.Do something to prepare for Vegas - pack or something.
22 May 17 Game Free: 35 (17 Apr) Had a big step back with my health this weekend. I don't know if it is because I have been getting up at 5am every day so need more sleep or not, but it is a source of frustration. Yesterday I woke up with a sore throat and feeling blocked up, and last night I had a coughing fit that was so bad I was sick. My optimism that this would be gone by the time I hit Vegas is gone. I've tried every herb and/or drug that I could get my hands on, drank so much water that I needed to go to the bathroom every half hour, still no dice. Achieved all my goals again yesterday, thinking of maybe I should start a counter for that as well. I am up to 13 days on Duolingo. Not sure if I like having so many counters though, like I did before my anxiety breakdown. I will do some mediating/reflecting about it and see what value I might get from it. I am a sucker for retroachievements.org. I am spending too much time on it. For example, on Saturday I got a lot of work done on my electronics projects, and around the house in breaks from my study. But yesterday I didn't get any of this done, in between study I just surfed the web and checked out that site. The end result was when it got to dinner to spend time with my family, I was depressed. I need to walk away from the screens in between the breaks. Obviously staring at a screen is one of the main problems that screws up our behaviour, not just the games. Have my Resilio server up and running - but it keeps freezing. I don't know why. I have it running on a RPi and on a normal PC, for the aim of syncing everything across to the RPi and leave that running instead to save on power, but it has frozen 3 times in a day already. I have no idea why. I should do some researching on it but I think I have spent too much time on it right now - I need to focus on some other things, like my family this week before my trip. Today's Goals: Complete 1 hour of study. I think I will only be able to get 1 hour done by balancing work and family time. I am above 2,000 words now though.Get Resilio and VPN client set up on my Windows laptop - the laptop I was building will not be ready before the trip, and I will need something to keep studying on (yes in Vegas, urgh).Meditate for 5-10 minutes when I get back from work. This might help me from being depressed. I don't want two days of that.Do a little bit of tinkering on my RPi laptop - I'd like it to be at point where I can bring it back in from the garage before the trip so it doesn't collect dust.Four goals! Riskayyyy
This should not be an issue or something you think about Chris! I worried about mine for a while, until I realised you're writing it for yourself, not anybody else, so it doesn't matter what their opinion is. If they are bored, they won't read it, but many people will probably get inspiration from it.
21 May 17 Game Free: 34 (17 Apr) Wow "Sit with it" is hard! I closed everything down yesterday, just had my draft open, and exactly 6 minutes in my brain was like "why don't you just google this". I actually laughed at myself. I didn't realise I was that bad. So I told myself no, and powered on. About another 5-6 minutes later, my brain starts thinking "you should check out a RPi script for this...." It was crazy. It stayed that way for about the first half hour, and then I think my brain gave up and just knuckled down and focused. As a result, I did get 3 hours of study done, but the big difference is this time I actually felt quite accomplished at the end, rather than feeling like I needed to study more and didn't achieve anything. Quite happy with that. I didn't think I would see results after only one attempt, but I hope now in my next session I will go 9 minutes between my brain trying to trail off. I achieved all my goals yesterday - first time in a while! I wonder if it is because before I made them this time, I made sure they were relatively small and I thought I could achieve them with some effort, but not heaps. I guess a contributing factor was how easy setting up the Resilio Sync (formerly BitTorrent) - I am absolutely amazed. How are people paying for cloud storage if a program like this exists? Of course though, my problem now is my preoccupation, because I just want to sink time into it to get everything sync'd from my phone to the RPi. I can never seem to do things in small bites, I always seem to go in boots and all. It does explain why I am here though! I can't just play a few games, I need to go in boots and all. Had a massive urge yesterday to play Colonization - the game that basically swallowed my childhood. It came from watching a clip of Harvest Moon on YouTube and thinking about profitable crops etc. I am not sure why I was watching Harvest Moon clips, I guess it was just my brain taking control again. Anyway, the point of writing that is I can understand why Cam says not to watch Twitch streams or clips or whatever, it is a slippery slope. I am sure that if I hadn't set up the extra barrier of just running RPIs with linux on them I would have at least fired it up and played a few turns.... a few hours.... not completed any study at all.... Today's Goals: Complete 3 hours of study, again. Hopefully get over 2,000 words.Figure out the permissions problem with Resilio and a USB so I can backup my phone before my trip.Go for a walk or drive with the family to a park. Try to relax and not think about study and work when we are there.
20 May 17 Game Free: 33 (17 Apr) Feeling much better again today, but now I feel bad emotionally. Now it's the weekend my family wants to go do things together but I really need to study and get some headway on my assignments, so I still feel like a jerk Dad and disconnected from my family. They are off to the zoo and here I am sitting at my desk in front of my computers, where I always used to be, so I can't help but ponder what has changed? I am going to use that as a catalyst for a "Sit with it" day. I am going to stand up my 3 goals a day again, and today's is going to be to smash out 3 hours of study this afternoon so me having these guilt feelings are not for naught. I also need to shake up my morning routine I think, I started getting up an hour earlier than everyone else as per GTD to get some stuff out the way, and I do, but it mostly is around my to do lists, such as deleting emails or checking my credit card etc etc. I am thinking maybe it should change to be reading, or studying, or something, so that it sets a good note for the day. I do like the feeling of having all my crappy little jobs that usually distract me out the way, but I don't think it puts me in a productive mindset. So tomorrow I'll just get straight into study. Alright, here we go, a Sit with it session, starting now. Close all distractions. Today's Goals: Complete 3 hours of study.Setup a BitTorrent sync server to back up my study notes across my computers.Do something for my family to make up for not being with them today.