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seriousjay

Jay's Epic Journey

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So as I posted in another thread, yesterday I forgot to go to the gym because I was busy playing video games. I fully intended to, but forgot until about 9 PM, when I turned off the game to get ready for bed. In other words, when I unplugged from the game and plugged back in to real life.

I need to change my mindset towards down time. So many things I want to do, like reading and writing, just feel like work. I need to find a way to experience joy from doing those things, among others, and place less emphasis on being entertained.

If anyone has any ideas for how to actually do this, I'd really appreciate the help. Specifically, @Cam Adair, maybe you have some suggestions? Maybe this is something worth making a video about?

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Yesterday, I came to the realization that I'm really not a very grateful person at all. I was driving to my mom's house and it dawned on me that I really do have a lot to be grateful for, but because there are things that I want and don't have, it isn't enough. I get the sense that if I continue along this path, there is no amount of anything that could satisfy me.

This was hammered home when I got to my mom's house and looked up "how to be grateful for the things you have" on google. There were a bunch of lists of things to be grateful for, and I clicked one of the links. When I started reading the list, there were so many items that definitely applied to me but never even occurred to me to be grateful for.

So I'm really going to take gratitude practice to heart. I'm going to take a few minutes each morning and evening to appreciate the things I have in my life, and when I get stressed out or things start going somewhat awry during the day, I'm going to try to remind myself that even though some things aren't going the way I want at that moment, there are still plenty of things I can be happy about.

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On 5/12/2019 at 4:44 AM, seriousjay said:

 

I need to change my mindset towards down time. So many things I want to do, like reading and writing, just feel like work. I need to find a way to experience joy from doing those things, among others, and place less emphasis on being entertained.

Hey Jay, I think this has to do with your gaming past. I experience this too but it gets better the more time passes and the more faded my memories of strong adrenaline times become. You can't avoid or change the feeling of these hobbies being work, your mind is used to video games mechanics which reward us all the time for barely anything. What you can do is, because you know one is a real self improvement thing whereas gaming wasn't, you can insist and do the hobbies anyway. You'll probably rewire your brain like this, because you'll give it new experiences that include satisfaction despite the initial bias.

In other words, accept the bias and just do it anyway. It was unavoidable for me, but if you read my journal it's what got me away from it all for good this time.

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5 hours ago, fawn_xoxo said:

Hey Jay, I think this has to do with your gaming past. I experience this too but it gets better the more time passes and the more faded my memories of strong adrenaline times become. You can't avoid or change the feeling of these hobbies being work, your mind is used to video games mechanics which reward us all the time for barely anything. What you can do is, because you know one is a real self improvement thing whereas gaming wasn't, you can insist and do the hobbies anyway. You'll probably rewire your brain like this, because you'll give it new experiences that include satisfaction despite the initial bias.

In other words, accept the bias and just do it anyway. It was unavoidable for me, but if you read my journal it's what got me away from it all for good this time.

Thanks for your comment.

I pretty much came to the same conclusions. Just keep working at it and continue putting distance between my current self and my gaming past.

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So after a few days of practicing gratitude twice a day with just whatever comes to mind, I think I'm really starting to see some benefits. For some reason practicing verbally instead of noting it in my journal is making a big difference.

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So the other day it fully sunk in for me how important self-love is when it comes to just about everything. I've been hearing about it a lot over the past year or so, but now I'm actually starting to intentionally live it. It makes it so much easier to deny temptations and other things that don't serve me when I'm framing that denial as an act of self-love. I'm also finding my inner critic has a lot less power over me as well.

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