d.manuk's journal

[Cam Adair]

Oh so cool! What do they each mean?

1st pic is a commitment to a minimalist apartment. I like how empty rooms look and so the goal is to have an apartment that almost looks empty

2nd pic is something I want to do. I want to try growing moss even though its hard to do indoors, I also bought a small quartz crystal bunch so that it would look like that picture.

3rd pic is my goal for writing my fantasy book that I won't work on until after I pass my test.

4th pic is from the anime Cardcaptor Sakura, which has a main theme of believing in yourself because everything will be alright.

5th pic is from the newer Cardcaptor Sakura series, which shows that I will stay true to myself and follow my passions even if others think they are silly or weird.

6th pic is the designation I am aiming for, my test date is March 21st!

Very cool!

[d.manuk]

Today is day 90 of my detox. It’s also day 1 of my 30 day, 30 minutes in the morning, yoga challenge!

 

I have not played a video game for 90 consecutive days! Unplugging my gaming computer and putting it away helped a lot with this. I am still in the process of trying to sell it (no one wants it ). I had some negative feelings in the first few weeks but I don’t have them now and I think that change is also visible in my journal entries.

 

My goal for now is to stay videogame free until Maplestory 2 is released, which will likely be in the fall of 2017 or later. Maybe I won’t find it fun because there will be a lot of grinding and won’t be as fun as living real life! Either way, when I play I will try to socialize more instead of being a ‘solo player.’ But that is a long ways off and I won’t think about it for now. Maybe it is a mistake to not set a goal of being videogame free for life; I am not sure yet. Either way, I have already stopped playing videogames that don't bring me joy.

 

Right now my main goals are to complete my yoga challenge and study for the CFP.

I am in the process of selling a lot of things. I would say we have decreased about 35% of our belongings since moving into the new apartment because I want it to look nice. I will still continue with journal entries even though my 90 day detox is over because I like it.

 

Edit: I found someone to purchase my gaming computer -- he should come pick it up tomorrow. I realized something as I booted up the computer in order to factory reset it. A lot of emotions swept through me as I turned it on, knowing I would be parting with it soon. I was really sad and overall uncomfortable. I almost felt addicted just looking at my home screen and watching how fast it loaded. I realized how awesome the computer was after being away from it for so long. It is VERY high end. So part of me is sad that I am only selling it for 1/5 the price, and another part of me is sad because that chapter of my life involving high end gaming will be ending. Owning the computer and not using it is not the same as not owning it at all. After turning it on, I realized I could easily be sucked into video games for a period of time if I had a slip-up. My goal going forward is to be video game free for the rest of my life, and to not play Maplestory 2. Lots of thoughts and changes are going through my head on the final day of my detox! Looks like I'm still figuring this out.

Edited December 6, 2016 by Shine Magical

[Cam Adair]

Congrats!!!

[WorkInProgress]

it alwas brings up emotions if your realize the changes in your life.

Congratulations on the 90 days and welcome to the other side!

(one of us. one of us one ofus xD)

[d.manuk]

I sold my computer and deposited the $1050 in the bank.

 

I feel a little overwhelmed because I have a lot to do at work, and have not studied since the move, and there is still a lot of stuff I want to sell and it takes up space in my apartment which bothers me.

[Cam Adair]

I sold my computer and deposited the $1050 in the bank.

[d.manuk]

I had 2 dreams about video games which is a little weird since I didn't really have any during my detox. I think it's because I sold my gaming computer.

[d.manuk]

I have made an additional $210 after selling my computer, and there is still more to come.

 

I have also decided not to do yoga every day for 30 consecutive days, but rather will wake up 3 out of 5 workdays earlier. Doing it consecutively day after day makes me too tired and then after a while I don't really end up doing anything.

[Cam Adair]

My workout schedule is like this: weights 3x/week, yoga 2/x week, and then I usually surf 2-3x/week. The balance between all of them helps me a lot. Weights are for strength and getting stress out, yoga is for flexibility and feeling incredible, surf is FUN.

[Piotr]

Good job on completing 90 days detox!

It's good that you sold your computer, any idea on what you gonna invest your money?

[d.manuk]

Good job on completing 90 days detox!

It's good that you sold your computer, any idea on what you gonna invest your money?

You could say I invested it into my boyfriend because his birthday and Christmas presents cost a good amount of money.

When I gave him his birthday present, he didn't like it... he said he disliked it 4 times that night. I was soooo mad.

It was a hotpot/shabushabu/barbeque cooker, because he previously said the food I cook tastes bland and I thought this would be a good way to still make quick-ish meals that are healthy. He said it was more a present for me than for him... he saw how annoyed I got and eventually said he liked it and that he had just been disappointed we weren't going out to eat at a restaurant.

He will like his Christmas present more though since it is something he asked for.

[d.manuk]

Today is day 99 without video games 

 

I have made $510 since selling my gaming computer, with more to come. The pile at the end of the living room is starting to decrease! Having it there was making me very anxious and I realized I bought a lot of stuff that I previously didn't need, and possibly that a lot of the stuff that I felt was cluttering our previous apartment was actually mine.

Since moving into the new apartment, I also set it up so that it would be harder to access technology in general (laptop charger is in a slightly inconvenient place and laptop can't charge while I'm using it and since it is old it only have a 1hr50min battery life, phone is charging in a place just out of reach of my bed so I have to get up and bend over to access it). Overall, these are good changes although they upset me sometimes, but they end up limiting my "garbage" technology time which is good.

Still haven't studied since moving to my new apartment but I am hoping to start today.

 

I would say I don't have the best relationship with my boyfriend at the moment because he wants to watch TV and stuff a lot, whereas I am trying to break away from doing that (partially because I feel like I don't have time). I have been working a lot on making the apartment nice and doing chores, and I worked almost all weekend on work-related things (I actually went into the office on Saturday). I am feeling a little overwhelmed with these responsibilities and also dealing with his expectations as to how I should be spending the time I have when I am off from work. He appreciates but would not personally do the things I am doing at the moment to improve the apartment, so it is just a little frustrating since I still feel like I don't have that much time left over to study and exercise!!

 

I think next week will be better though.

Edited December 14, 2016 by Shine Magical

[Piotr]

I think next week will be better though.

Surely it will be better!

[d.manuk]

Today is day 101 without video games.

I have made $1,210 since selling my gaming computer, and have sold everything I had set out to sell. I still want to get rid of more stuff though, but I feel like I am starting to run out of things to sell that are mine. I will have to take a more accurate inventory next week.

I am going to try to hold off on replacing my phone and laptop for now, since they are not broken, but they might be due for an upgrade next year.

 

Things I want to buy:

- A few more work clothes

- 2 pairs of shoes

- New iPhone

- New computer

- A new coat for spring

- New home clothes

- Wireless earbuds

- Carry on suitcase

- New robot vacuum

 

Things I want to work on:

Studying

Tasting all of the tea samples I recently bought

Eating more salads

Signing up for the 1 month free gym membership in my building to go swimming

Figuring out a better system for my clothes/coats/shoes/work bag

Managing my emotions at work when people say things that I think are crazy but they are actually 100% serious instead of exploding (I have ordered a library book regarding this)

Read more

Spend less time with technology

Make $300 more dollars selling stuff I own

 

I have not studied in 3 weeks since my move and I need to do that this weekend and stop putting it off in order to declutter the apartment. No more excuses! The apartment is in good enough shape to start.

Edited December 17, 2016 by Shine Magical

[Cam Adair]

Enjoying your updates. You have a very good focus right now!

[d.manuk]

I studied for 4 hours today. It was a good way to start winding up.

I also got my free 1 month membership to my buildings gym and worked out a little. I will go swimming tomorrow

I have listed a few more things for sale on eBay and I ate 1 salad just now. I have taken a few small steps today in the right direction. Also in general, I feel like since I have moved, I feel like I have been slowly stepping into a new life.

Edited December 18, 2016 by Shine Magical

[d.manuk]

Today is day 104 without video games.

Lately I have been thinking about buying a new laptop, since the one I am currently using is a budget one from 2012. If I don't plan on playing Maplestory 2, then I should be fine just buying one now. But if I plan on playing it, then I would need a better one and also a more expensive one, and I might as well wait 1 more year for the prices to drop and the game to come out. So, I currently feel like I am at a crossroads with this decision - do I really not plan on playing any video games going forward? 

I am going to be receiving a new iPhone for Christmas, so now would also be a good time for a new computer, because I will need to download all of the songs I want onto either my laptop or the new computer I buy, because my gaming laptop had my music library on it.

 

Start date: 9/6

http://www.timeanddate.com/date/duration.html

[dandielionous]

 

On 104 days

I don't understand why people feel like after 90 days they can go back to gaming!  90 days is the detox.  If you detox cigarettes for 90 days do you think it's alright to smoke then?

 

[d.manuk]

 

On 104 days

I don't understand why people feel like after 90 days they can go back to gaming!  90 days is the detox.  If you detox cigarettes for 90 days do you think it's alright to smoke then?

 

My main goal was to stop playing video games I didn't like (League of Legends) just because it was a habit, or to pass time. Maplestory 2 is the only game I would want to play in the future, so now I need to think about if I really want to quit forever. I've mentioned quitting forever previously, but I will admit that I said it halfheartedly, and now that a decision needs to be made I need to commit to it. I think watching some of the game play videos might help me make a decision. I will try to make a decision tonight and also read through my past journal entries.

[Cam Adair]

Gaming after your detox should be approached with extreme caution. Watch both of these videos:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eS4kw92Xem4

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vgGZlq71jT4

 

 

 

[d.manuk]

I've been mulling it over and am still thinking it through.

 

1. I watched Maplestory 2 gameplay videos, and found the gameplay to be 65% fun, 35% not fun (again, the game isn't even available in the US for at least another half year -- I am deciding if I should play this game in the future, because I am already committed to not playing other video games). Weirdly (or not), although at first I wasn't that interested and also found it kind of boring, after a while of watching I became a little more interested but at the same time still kind of boring. It felt like it was growing on me a little bit which was a little concerning.

2. I worked late today, but still went to the gym afterwards, because it's in my building now and I am much more willing to go even if its only for 25 minutes. That made me feel a little accomplished.

3. I also water picked my teeth today, which is something I like to do (but still don't do very frequently because then it turns my nightly dental routine into a 10-15 minute event). If I were playing Maplestory 2, I would not have done so.

4. So that goes back to control -- I watched the videos Cam linked and also the 'gaming in moderation' video where someone played 10 hours of videogames every 2 months. If I were to play now and just replace my anime/internet viewing with Maplestory 2, it would be about 3 hours per week. But it would go higher than that quickly I think because I am very bad at self control with things I really like that are somewhat bad for me - hence why I don't drink, smoke, and also no longer use drugs.

5. It also goes back to opportunity loss -- it's really hard for me to currently think about my other goals in life because I have to study for the CFP (which I am now 30 hours behind schedule). But it is important not to forget that I will eventually be able to replace my study time with time to work on my book/manga.

6. Social life - This might be something I still need to work on. I'm not sure if its ok to continue being like I am now and being this introverted.

7. Money + Technology - Buying a laptop that would play Maplestory 2 at high settings would cost somewhere between 1400-1600$. The money part isn't really an issue for me, but it would be more convenient not to pay it. One of my goals was also to get away from technology more, and perhaps keeping my old laptop would be a good way to do that.

 

It's probably better for me not to play. There are other things I want to do in life and if I play Maplestory 2, I might not be able to do them. Also, it is more relaxing to not play video games because they seem kind of like an obligation. You don't want to be level 9!

 

I think it would be helpful to read the journal entries of people that went back to gaming and read their thoughts. Whether they regretted it or not, I think it would help so if anyone knows of a good example, please let me know :P

Edited December 21, 2016 by Shine Magical

[Cam Adair]

Agree with your assessment.

[dandielionous]

1000-Day-Challenge

 

[d.manuk]

My thought process so far:

 

Why I want to play:

-Cute game and I love cute things

- Nostalgia

- Reconnect with 2 or more friends

-Have been excited for/had plans to play this game for over 5 years

-Fantasy world

-Would give me joy and excitement

 

Why I don’t want to play:

-Underlying gameplay looks boring and repetitive

-Would deplete my free time

-Would not work out as much and would not work on my book if I played

-Game would be fun, but only 65% fun = a weird combination of ‘this is good enough to continue to play’ but feels like something is lacking. Whereas in real life, where I guess instead of having fun like in a videogame, I tend to feel content which is a more lackluster emotion but also somehow doesn’t come along with a ‘something is missing’ feeling.

-Would tidy less

-Would feel more rushed doing everyday things

-Might cut off my no-gaming-journey-to-a-new-and-better-life short before I start to feel 'real' changes... I kind of feel like I would need to go through a year of no gaming to make an informed decision regarding the choices I am faced with now.

Edited December 21, 2016 by Shine Magical

[WorkInProgress]

Hey i don't want to dig in the mammoth of my Journal but to summarize it I tried to Play in Moderation wiht an oldschoolgame I enjoyed(Wc3) and it didn't work at all. I jsut snapped back into addiction right away playing 2-3 days straight and feelign really bad. I jsut fall back into bad Habits and stuff. So I caught myself and never plyaed from this Point. I read that undertow(or a similar Name) played in Moderation afterwards but decided to stop agian not because of addiction but because he felt like it was taking too much time fo more important activities. There are surely some People out there who Play in Moderation and make it work. But if oyu ask me I don't know why you should take the risk. There are so much fun activities out there. There is absolutely no ened to use games to entertain you