Ikar 1896 Posted April 21, 2019 Share Posted April 21, 2019 (edited) Hello there! My name is Martin (Ikarases on the net) and I am 21. My backstory is that approximately from the age of 12, I spend most of my free time either playing games or browsing the Internet. I've even tried full-time streaming professionally recently, however I realized my gaming taste just doesn't drag enough attention, even though I still sometimes stream nowadays a few hours a day. I'd attribute my desire to stream to a lack of social connection IRL, at least back then when I started out streaming roughly three years ago. Not until several months ago, I started uninstalling some games just to fall into the clutches of another one. In the years before, I felt burnt-out on games, but the recurrent theme always was "What the hell am I gonna do anyway?" I also started alternating playing myself with watching Twitch and even streaming myself occasionally, which helped with diversification, but didn't really solve the core issue. What I did with Twitch recently as well was to setup LeechBlock on morning hours to spare myself some time on other things like school, reading and other priorities I have in life. However both uninstalling games and LeechBlock are only in effect as long as you want them to be in effect. Reason I am writing this is that I feel gaming/watching streams suppresses my passions and impedes work on other projects and that they are my number 1 go-to activity when idle. Main recent impulse I am here is my very first (and former?) girlfriend told me she needs to take a break from our relationship about a month ago (not on the "I hate you for LIFE." side of things though). After even struggling to acknowledge her current standpoint for a few weeks, I shifted my focus inwards; I started watching TED talks, got a new bike, deactivated my FB and started reading more. I think I'm a nice guy, but that only goes so far if about 12/16 hours of my waking time is spent behind a computer screen. I even started writing a diary on my own, mapping my thoughts and feelings every now and then, as I feel there's some "unfinished business" between the two of us and I plan to show her my diary and the posts on this forum too. Spending time with her was better than spending time gaming or watching streams! I'm past the point where I'd HAVE TO spend my whole day behind computer, however I do it regardless for lack of motivation to do other things. I know my other hobbies are geography, English teaching, modern history, I even considered making models of WWII tanks among other things. I know I have several papers due to hand at the university, where I study geography, but mostly I just procrastinate that until there's just a few days left. Creating a commitment on the Internet to cut down my Internet time seems paradoxical, but I'll give it a go regardless. I'll say this is my 1/90, because even though I watched a bit of streams today, I didn't game myself. I think it's about time to change my habit and take my life back. Thanks for reading this and all the support is very appreciated! I consider this to be my day 1 entry. MY GOALS: 1. No gaming/Twitch for 90 days 2. Beginning 1st June, consciously spend less time on PC to avoid falling into other digital traps (YT, series-binging etc.) These are likely the easiest ones to fall into for me because of the proximity. Edited April 24, 2019 by Ikar 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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