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Tom2's 2nd attempt


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Day 10 was good


<Gratitude list>

1. I'm glad that I can take online lecture for civil engineering.

2. I'm grateful for the shower after exercising.

3. I'm grateful for the fact that I could deal with doubt in myself with more ease.

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Day 11 was great

- It was productive. I'm happy right now. I want to sleep as it's 12 am. 



1. I had pizza this evening.

2. I have 2 months of vacation.

3. I can drink water whenever I want. lol

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Day 12

- It wasn't a productive day. I'll do better on Sunday.

- My mom got mad because I didn't do the dishes right after we had dinner. I was tired for some reason and it wasn't an important thing that has to be done right away. So It was irritating. She used some bad words to me. I just ignored because I wanted to get rest. (I did the dishes after getting rest. Can't understand why I have to do that 'right away'. Perhaps my perfectionism is influenced by my mom.)



1. Mom and I enjoyed watching <Dark knight rises> while having dinner.

2. I went back to English academy. It was good to meet instructor again.

3. I'm relieved because there's Sunday.

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Yeah I have exactly same experience with my mom and grandmother. Everything must be done now! Not later. This way I was manipulated when I was younger. These days I laughing at them and making things whenever I want.

Edited by Onlysoul
grammar baby
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Day 13

- Quite good. I made a plan to finish the online lecture for civil engineer certificate, within 60 days. I want to finish 'surveying' part in 10 days. I'm not sure whether I can finish the whole lecture. However, it would be worthwhile if I finish 70-80% of the goal. No perfectionism. I split the big goal into small ones.



1. I didn't waste the whole day even if it wasn't perfect day.

2. Roasted beef that my mother made this evening was great.

3. Glad to read Onlysouls' reply.

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How do you keep yourself motivated to study for so long during one day? I think you could teach me a few tricks! I get distracted too easily.

I have three methods. I also get distracted easily when I study. I'm an amateur in learning something but I hope these tips could help you.

1. Making my own note : I make my own notes using Google Docs. Usually, studying was just consuming contents for me. I got bored quickly when I just read text and solve some questions. So I made my own note. It was very interesting and fun because it helped me to organize thoughts. Every textbooks are not perfect. I don't have to read the whole text in those so I can summarize the subject easily with Google Docs. It's very easy to edit the documents so it's more powerful than paper notes. And I can review the things that I've learned through this, anywhere because I don't have to carry bunch of papers. I only need a cellphone. Sometimes I can share my notes with my friend and it's also very joyful to work on it together. It's similar to wikipedia or open source things.

2. Studying with video courses : I can manage my time easily with video courses. When I watch something that I already know enough, I can skip the time. It's very flexible. It also helps me stay focused because I can skip when I get bored.

3. Studying with other people : It's more active than just studying alone as I and others can discuss when we have questions. It's specifically adaptable to learn something via team project. When I study with other people, I get more responsibility so I can focus more.

+ pomodoro technique is also a good trick to be productive.



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Day 14

- Today was quite ok, but I need to study more tomorrow. I must.



1. Fixed some electric stuff in my parent's apartment.

2. It rained cats and dogs.

3. There was a pair of sandals in the closet.

Edited by Tom2
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Day 15

- It was a lazy day. I always think about the amount of works to do before I even start. And that makes me tired. That makes me seek something that entertains me. I should start studying right away when I sit on the chair, but it's not easy.

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Day 16 was good.

- Started 'habitica' and set up a new goal. Studying 4 or 6 hours everyday. I really need to increase the time. I can study 4 hours a day without much effort but studying 6 hours is not easy for me yet. I want to make the blue line rise. The graph doesn't look good until now, but I will change it. The red graph is not that important because it also includes productive tasks. The important thing is the blue graph! Whoa there were a lot of days when I didn't study during the spring semester... I must change. The reason why I decided to use habitica is I found myself being lazy when I sit on a chair. I should start studying as soon as possible after I sit, but I feel always bored and lose momentum when I try to open a textbook. I should be 110% into civil engineering, but I keep looking back. I've already decided to keep studying but I sway too often.



- I joined a group where people who are interested in getting civil engineer certificate gather. I couldn't find any of my friends trying to get one, so I had no choice but to find similar people on the internet. I will talk to them more and ask some questions.

Edited by Tom2
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Day 17

- Ok... I wasn't decisive today. I already made the choice, but I keep looking back. It's time to stop. I thought about gaming in moderation today, but I made the conclusion that I can't control myself. It's proven by my journals, relapse thread, and experience. It's time to let it go. I need to focus now. One good thing is that I made up my mind. Another good thing is that I didn't play video games even though I had craving and nostalgia. Nothing much to say. I didn't like to leave this post, but I think it's still part of my journey so I decided to leave the record.

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As soon as I get those feelings or thoughts I now rip myself out of the environment. If I am at home, I go outside, and if I am at work I leave the office and go for a walk around to talk to people. Don't let it plant its roots!

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