Daniel Posted September 7, 2016 Author Posted September 7, 2016 Day 56Thank you guys. These days have been like I would like to stay up to date with the game I was addicted to. I need to decide one of the following activities for the night.I have experience with the following and had positive results before:Reading Origami DrawingWritingCard games Not so much experience with the following: PodcastsYogaMeditationMagic
Cam Adair Posted September 8, 2016 Posted September 8, 2016 Meditation is a good habit to start getting into. Recommended 10 mins/day!
Reno F Posted September 8, 2016 Posted September 8, 2016 Have you thought about becoming an illustrator? You can work as freelancer on the internet!By the way, this name, Vainglory, it is trying to tell something to your uncouncious mind. Like, literally, vain glory.
Daniel Posted September 8, 2016 Author Posted September 8, 2016 (edited) Day 57Lack of focus, didn't manage to get to the gym. I still imagine playing or creating tactics/strategies for the games. Meditation is a good habit to start getting into. Recommended 10 mins/day! I'll do this at the evening then.Have you thought about becoming an illustrator? You can work as freelancer on the internet!By the way, this name, Vainglory, it is trying to tell something to your uncouncious mind. Like, literally, vain glory. Haha, good one, I will keep that in mind. Edited September 8, 2016 by Daniel
Marquess Posted September 8, 2016 Posted September 8, 2016 (edited) I recently started meditating at the end of my "workday" such as it is right now. I find that's the best time. Also looked up meditating before sleep, but it's apparently not advisable as you don't want your brain to start associating meditation with sleep.Many people seem to do it in the morning too.Reddit has a very good FAQ on the topic. There's a lot of all-that-great info on it around. Edited September 8, 2016 by Marquess
Daniel Posted September 9, 2016 Author Posted September 9, 2016 (edited) Day 58Yesterday had a slow morning. All the usual, lack of focus and slight cravings. iI got better in the afternoon. Went to the gym and had a good night sleep which definitly is making feel great this morning. Before going to sleep I thought about meditation or at least a self analysis about me and videogames. I related videogames with a very happy stage in my life. Also when I was lonely videogames would be my refugee. It would be a social activity as well.I recently started meditating at the end of my "workday" such as it is right now. I find that's the best time. Also looked up meditating before sleep, but it's apparently not advisable as you don't want your brain to start associating meditation with sleep.Many people seem to do it in the morning too.Reddit has a very good FAQ on the topic. There's a lot of all-that-great info on it around.Thanks! I will be reading and applying it. Edited September 11, 2016 by Daniel
Daniel Posted September 11, 2016 Author Posted September 11, 2016 (edited) Day 59I ordered some replacement parts for my fathers laptop and I ended up searching for a newer iphone where I could play videogames. I only bought the laptop parts but it amazes me how I still think about the game. It's like I had been on and off the pink cloud.I noticed a relation with the craving. The more the cravings I have, the less motivated and focused I feel. The less cravings, the more motivated and focused. Edited September 11, 2016 by Daniel
Cam Adair Posted September 13, 2016 Posted September 13, 2016 Even 8+ months after a break-up I still think of my ex. Takes time, be patient.
Daniel Posted September 13, 2016 Author Posted September 13, 2016 (edited) Day 60Has been bad weekend. I even missed to post my daily journal entry of the saturday.Today I binged on streams. Started with those prank videos and chess videos. Then thought well perhaps some videogames streams wont hurt. Finally I was about play videogames online. Two reasons stopped me. One was that I didn't want to relapse and break my badge system. Second I thought I'd be rusty so why bother.This is odd. Another way I manifest my addiction (when the cravings are strong) is with poor eating habits. Edited September 13, 2016 by Daniel
WorkInProgress Posted September 13, 2016 Posted September 13, 2016 Good that you were able to stop yourself. How could you evade such things better in the future? Do you know why you felt the need to binge?
Reno F Posted September 13, 2016 Posted September 13, 2016 (edited) Even 8+ months after a break-up I still think of my ex. Takes time, be patient. It took me over one year to get over a 3-month relationship once.Day 60Has been bad weekend. I even missed to post my daily journal entry of the saturday.Hope you're doing better! And it's been 60 days! You did it for 60 days! You can do 61! Edited September 13, 2016 by Reno F
Daniel Posted September 13, 2016 Author Posted September 13, 2016 Day 61That was rough. I'm feeling better and will do my best to get back on track. To stop daydreaming about video games heroes and become my own personal hero.Good that you were able to stop yourself. How could you evade such things better in the future? Do you know why you felt the need to binge?I think I felt stressed. Probably just need a better outlet for it. In a way I seem to enjoy analyzing other people playing.Even 8+ months after a break-up I still think of my ex. Takes time, be patient. It took me over one year to get over a 3-month relationship once.Day 60Has been bad weekend. I even missed to post my daily journal entry of the saturday.Hope you're doing better! And it's been 60 days! You did it for 60 days! You can do 61!This is what keeps me going the amount of time invested. It seems like I had been losing sight of the real goal.
SpiNips Posted September 13, 2016 Posted September 13, 2016 chess videosMy god they are the worst! (Have you checked Mato Jelic's channels – He's awesome )
Cam Adair Posted September 14, 2016 Posted September 14, 2016 chess videosMy god they are the worst! (Have you checked Mato Jelic's channels – He's awesome )Mato is a legend. Big fan of Chess Network videos too.
Daniel Posted September 15, 2016 Author Posted September 15, 2016 Day 61Today I spent some more time looking for a new device for gaming. Then it hit me. I sold my accounts! And while I could simply buy a new account the fact that I deleted my old accounts discouraged me from getting another device. Urgh. Feeling horrible.
WorkInProgress Posted September 15, 2016 Posted September 15, 2016 Seems like you are really struggling at the Moment. Maybe it is time to go to the start of your journal and check out what moved you to stop gaming initially. You knew that this Phase will come and prepared yourself. Did you try to find another outlet for your stress? The idea is not only ot find something you enjoy but something you enjoy and helps you to move forward in your real life. You commited to a 90 day detox and I would really advice to honor this commitment and go gamefree this last 29 days. Then you can say to yourself that you are able to do such a Thing, even if it is hard for you. I am pretty sure that you don't need any gaming device.You can do this. Don't give in man!
Reno F Posted September 15, 2016 Posted September 15, 2016 It seems you anticipated this moment 61 days ago.Hang in there, Daniel!
Daniel Posted September 16, 2016 Author Posted September 16, 2016 Day 62A member sent me an emotive message with an awesome video, thanks.I need to put my web filters back on. Besides watching the streams I played online chess. There's this weird compulsive feeling about just gaming, eating crap and sleeping.
Daniel Posted September 17, 2016 Author Posted September 17, 2016 Day 63Relapsed. More information tomorrow.
Daniel Posted September 18, 2016 Author Posted September 18, 2016 Day 63As I said in my last post I relapsed. Now it's time to get back on track, now I'm just wondering if I should go for 90 days or 150 instead.All I can say is that there were danger signs and I decided to ignore them. While I didn't played Vainglory per se I did bing on streams and played online chess. My diet went to hell and stopped hitting the gym. It's time to start again.
WorkInProgress Posted September 18, 2016 Posted September 18, 2016 Hey welcome back on track. THe good thing at relapses is that you see how it made you feel to game again( most of the time good at the start and pretty fast shitty) and are able to see what got you there. Start again and evade the mistakes you identified and you wilmake it. Your past improvement isn't gone. you can do this!
Daniel Posted September 19, 2016 Author Posted September 19, 2016 Day 64Thanks everyone who commented during my relapse. I feel like I'm back at day 1. After relapsing I find my gaming problem even more scarier.
Piotr Posted September 20, 2016 Posted September 20, 2016 You're not at day 1. Especially now when you're enriched with relapse knowledge. Just go back on track. Continue your journey.Although you find your gaming problem even more scarier, this doesn't mean it's unbeatable. To be honest, everyone finds gaming even easier to quit after relapse. Can't wait to hear more from you.
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