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On 9/29/2020 at 11:49 AM, Bird By Bird said:

Breathwork sounds interesting. I'll try it out one day.

I highly recommend trying it out. If you find the time I know there are some Wim Hof youtube videos that guide you through. Also, you can check out the Wim Hom app. The guided breathwork section is free at the moment. 

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Day 94

I've been tired when I get home from work as this is my first week back in a while. As a result I have missed a few days of posting. 

Still on the quit train. Still doing my daily meditation. Just about finished the 2nd version of Taking Shapes (the board game I've been working on). To be honest version 2 hasn't required too much work. I had already done some playtesting and tweaking in the past so I was nearly finished already. Still, version 2 took a little brainpower but it's nearly complete. I'll post some photos soon @royal panda. Once this final version is complete, I'm going to write up an instruction manual and then put the files up on the Gamecrafter. For now that's about all I can do. Making board games isn't cheap and I definitely cannot afford to have anything mass produced. For now, I would be happy if I could sell a few copies and bring some smiles to peoples faces. Also, once this game is done I can get to work on making some more. Down the road though I would love to get more copies out into the world. 

I really hope everybody is doing well and keeping their chins up during this most bizarre year. 

All the best. Stay off the vids!

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Day 96

Went to Hamilton today to help my brother move a freezer from my Dad's place into his place. Bit of an ordeal but nothing we couldn't handle. Had to remove the door of the freezer to get it into my brothers basement but other then that it wasn't a big deal. After that I sat down with my Dad and he taught me to play Cribbage. Fun game. I mean I've just barely learned the basics but I can see why it's still so popular to this day. 

Then we sat down and had a delicious meal. My brothers and his wife April made an amazing meal of a smoked beef roast, and barbequed potatoes, butternut squash and asparagus. I'm not much of a roast person but I have to say trying it smoked was really good. 

After I got back to Toronto from Hamilton I picked up Adrienne and we ran out and picked up a cast iron table base that somebody was giving away. Pretty sweet. Looking forward to making a nice tabletop for it down the road. 

In a few minutes I'm going to bottle my first batch of Kombucha! This is my second attempt at making my own (the first one didn't turn out). I completed the first fermentation period of the tea. Now it's time to bottle that batch and perform a second, shorter fermentation period. Looking forward to trying it. 

After that I am going to crash. All this driving and moving and eating has made me plenty tired. 

Night all. 

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Day 97

Nice relaxing day today. Got up and made some breakfast. Then I sat around and started Season 4 of The Good Place. Really enjoying that show. 

After that I ordered some Thai food and enjoyed that before heading out for a walk. The weather was kind of crumby but I brought an umbrella so it was all good. Just relaxed, took my time and listened to relaxing music as I walked. 

When I got back in I wrote out my plans for the week. After that I watched a few more episodes of The Good Place. Then I did some Wim-Hof breathing and now I'm about to get ready for bed. 

Since I've gone back to work I haven't been the best of sticking to my plans. This week I intend to stick to my schedule. The three big things this week are finishing The Secret Nature of Plants, catching on the Indigenous Canada class that I started at the beginning of September and working out the last details of my board game. 

It's funny the last day or two I've had a lot of video game dreams. The one I had last night bothered me a bit. In the dream I realized that I had played a bunch of video games but I was so nonchalant about it that I didn't care when I realized it. I was just like no big deal, I can play video games now. Then I woke up. Man, just when I think I've got this under control I'm reminded that it'll low key always be there. That dream reminded me to always be vigilant. 

Have a good night all. Stay strong and game free! 

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Day 104

Whoah! It's been a while since my last post. Work and goals and early bedtimes have been keeping me from journaling. I will do my best to write something every day from now on, even it's just a paragraph or two. 

The last week has been sort of a blur. It usually goes like this (or some variation of). Go to work. Come home. Do Yoga. Practice Wim-Hof breathwork. Listen to an audio book (or finish watching The Good Place - as I did earlier in the week - great show!). By about this point I am very tired and end up going to bed. 

The most recent audio book I finished was very interesting to me. It was called The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruis. It provides a very empowering way of going about your life. I highly recommend it as I found it's teaching could easily be applied to video game addiction.

I have found that my meditation, Yoga and breathing exercises are becoming easier and I feel I'm benefitting more from them every time I do them. I now find myself excited to do these practices. I nearly always wake up naturally, an hour or two before my alarm goes off to meditate. I think my mind acknowledges that it is benefitting me greatly. The same goes for the yoga and breathwork. I find I get excited about doing them now and I'm happy during the practice. 

I still catch myself dreaming about playing video games or wanting to play video games or talking about wanting to play video games. The dreams are becoming less potent but they are still pretty regular. Interestingly I don't find myself dreaming about smoking anymore. 

I find I am more at peace throughout my days. That's not to say that I haven't had my bad days but I recognize that my bad days are much less frequent, as are my bad moods. As always, I am very grateful to Cam for creating this space. My mind has become so much clearer and my habits so much more productive since I quit playing video games. I know I have so much more room to grow and I'm looking forward to what comes next. I don't see the future with anxiety or dread these days. I miss my gaming friends, that's a fact. However, the truth is, we didn't really communicate outside of playing games anyway. I hope that we'll get to spend time IRL down the road, but if not I can accept that. 

I hope everybody here is doing well, keeping safe and continuing on their journey to rid themselves of video game addiction with confidence and pride. 

All the best. 

 

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Day 105

Yesterday I finally got rid of my PS4. I had been using it as a Netflix machine for the last while but my brother wanted it (he's much more responsible when it comes to gaming) so I gave it to him. Not gonna lie. That definitely stung a little bit removing that from my life, but I'm glad it's gone. Now I just have to put my Wii U and PS3 collections up for sale and get them out of my life for good. I'll use some of the money from the sale to get myself something nice. Not sure what yet but I'll think of something. 

Have a good week everybody! 

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I am glad you were able to get rid of it, despite that stinging feeling. That feeling always occurs when you get rid of something that is or was close to your heart. I understand how you initially felt. I am glad though that you are now feeling great about your decision. Good luck on selling your Wii U and PS3!

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Day 106

Long day at work. Managed to get an hour of meditation in before I left. After work I did 20 minutes of Yoga, a session of Wim-Hof breathwork and then listened to the first few chapters of an audio book. I was thinking about playing a board game but I'm just too tired. Maybe I'll go over the instructions to one before I head to bed? I'm going to pass off the selling of my other consoles to my wife. She just needs me to make a list of all the games and whatnot and she'll put them up online. I would do it but I'm just too tired during the week and I would really like them gone. 

Ordered a new Wim-Hof book off of Amazon today. Looking forward to reading that when it shows up. 

Have a nice night everybody.

 

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Day 108

Not much to write. Tired today after working most of the day out in the rain. Hung out with a friend I haven't seen in a few weeks and chatted for a bit. Made me really think about putting money away to buy a house. First time in my life that I'm actually excited about saving up for a home. This time next year I should be able to get something. Time to start saving the monies. Going to be a thrifty year.

Night all.....

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13 hours ago, MuMuMelon said:

Day 108

Not much to write. Tired today after working most of the day out in the rain. Hung out with a friend I haven't seen in a few weeks and chatted for a bit. Made me really think about putting money away to buy a house. First time in my life that I'm actually excited about saving up for a home. This time next year I should be able to get something. Time to start saving the monies. Going to be a thrifty year.

Night all.....

That is amazing that you came to day 108! Good job buddy. I am stuck at the first few weeks 😞

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Day 109

Thanks @Mohammad, I appreciate the positivity! As for you, I see you've been struggling lately but  you can do this. I'm glad you decided to delete your account. Make as many obstacles as you need to quit. I know you can do this. Just keep trying until it sticks. 

Physically draining day at work today. I'm tired but the good kind of tired. I know I will sleep soundly tonight. Which is good as I'm heading out of town for a breathwork session. Really looking forward to that. Haven't made much headway on getting my board game completed but I should have some time this weekend to really put some effort in on that. 

My goals this weekend. 

1. Finish the audio book I started this week

2. Type up first draft of instruction manual for board game

3. meditate and do yoga every day

4. go for a walk every day

Have a good night everybody. I'm off to bed. 

 

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On 10/16/2020 at 8:10 PM, MuMuMelon said:

Day 109

Thanks @Mohammad, I appreciate the positivity! As for you, I see you've been struggling lately but  you can do this. I'm glad you decided to delete your account. Make as many obstacles as you need to quit. I know you can do this. Just keep trying until it sticks. 

Physically draining day at work today. I'm tired but the good kind of tired. I know I will sleep soundly tonight. Which is good as I'm heading out of town for a breathwork session. Really looking forward to that. Haven't made much headway on getting my board game completed but I should have some time this weekend to really put some effort in on that. 

My goals this weekend. 

1. Finish the audio book I started this week

2. Type up first draft of instruction manual for board game

3. meditate and do yoga every day

4. go for a walk every day

Have a good night everybody. I'm off to bed. 

 

Keep it up, man. I am inspired by you 🙂

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Day 111

Yesterday I went out in the afternoon for a socially distanced guided breathwork session. It was awesome! So hard to describe if you haven't experienced breathwork before but I had an amazing time. There were moments where I completely lost track of myself. Just gone. I didn't even realize I was so out of my head until I came back. Then I was like, oh....where was I? At one point the instructor said that "We are both the thought and the one experiencing the thought". My mind more or less melted trying to wrap my head around that idea and I seemed to go even deeper into the meditation. By the time it was over I had forgotten where my physical body was. Like, in my mind I knew what it was like to have a body but when I reached up to take off my sleep mask I found that I couldn't remember where in space my head was. After I stood up I felt like I was extremely light. It took an hour or two before I felt fully in my body again. Just a wild, unique experience. 

Today I am just chilling and spending the day with my wife. We just got back from running some errands and we are just about to go out again to do some more. After that I might play a board game or watch some Netflix. I've been meaning to try out a board game that I Kickstarted a while ago but I haven't had the time to get into. 

Also, I have an audio book to finish to continue listening to. 

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Day 113

Feeling tired today. I worked hard while I was at work but it was a short day. Ran some errands with Adrienne when I got in. Attempted to do some breathwork but my restless leg kicked in and really took my mind out of the experience. Haven't been feeling the most motivated after work these days. Tomorrow I have my first IRL yoga class though so I'm excited about that. I think I'm going to really like it. 

Not much else to say today. Going to bed. 

Night.

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Day 117

Man I'm doing a bad job at being consistent with this journal. 

Today was a super fun day of taking the car to shop, spending a bunch of time waiting around and finding out that I might have to spend a bunch more money in repairs. Ugh. I love having a car but I could really do without having to maintain it.

The rest of the week was find but busy. Mainly just worked, relaxed when I got home and headed to bed early most nights. Last night I had a few drinks of Saki with Adrienne and just hung out for a bit. 

I'm going to go for a hike dinner and then do some Wim Hof breathing and some Yoga afterwards.  After that who knows? Might do some reading. Might play a board game. Might drink some more Saki and play a board game. Might watch a movie. The sky is the limit. Probably head to bed relatively early though as I'm already feeling a bit tired from the day. 

Hope you're all having a fun weekend. Keep up with the not playing video games!

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Day 118

Almost at the four month mark. Pretty happy about that. Haven't had any video dreams in a while or cravings for that matter. I'm sure they'll pop up every now and then but I'm ready for them now. 

Had a positive day of doing stuff around the apartment and getting some Yoga, meditation and a decent hike in as well. Wasted a little time watching some Netflix - finally checked out the first episode of Full Metal Alchemist. Not bad. I'm not a huge anime fan by any stretch but I wanted to see what all the fuss was about and I have to say it starts off pretty good. 

Corona seems to be having a strong 2nd wave in Toronto these days. Not super happy about that. Still, I need to go to work. So, I guess I'll just have to be careful and deal with it. 

I hope everybody is keeping safe and doing well. I hope everyone's  desire to continue cutting out the video games is strong!

Night all. 

 

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Day 120

4 months! I'm tired from a long day at work but I'm still happy to hit this milestone. I didn't get up to too much today besides work. I meditated in the morning but that's really about it. 

I have Yoga class tomorrow night so that should be fun. 

I am once again concerned that I'm not keeping to a schedule or sticking to plans. I have yet to finish my board game (which is so close), and I'm still behind on finishing the last book I started. I realize that I'm back to work but I really don't like the idea of working and doing nothing when I get home. I want to push myself a little harder to accomplish some goals I've been thinking of for years. It's time to make a schedule and stick to it. 

Have a wonderful week all!

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Day 121

Work went long today. Barely had enough time to get home and eat quick meal before I had to rush out again to make my Yoga class at 8. Got home, had a bath, chatted with Adrienne for a bit. Now I'm off to bed. No thoughts about wanting to play games these last couple of weeks. No dreams about playing either. 

Want to say more but I'm very tired. 

Night everybody. 

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Day 127

Feel like I'm hitting a turning point in my life. I want to change how I eat so that I can be the best version of myself. I want to further commit myself to learning Yoga, meditation techniques, self actualization practice, and breathwork. I want to learn these things for myself and perhaps, down the road, to help other people. Up until yesterday I have had extremely unhealthy eating habits. I intend to work towards eating a fully vegan diet. I feel like there are going to be some major changes in my life. Quitting video games was just the beginning. Quitting video games blew open the doors on what is possible in my life. I have never been this excited to simply just exist in a very long time. I'm looking forward to what's next and doing my best to appreciate what I have right now. 

Hope all you quitters are doing good! 

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Just popped in to say thanks to @Commissar! I really appreciate the positive comments. I was reading your last post and this part really struck a cord with me...

"Games weren’t the problem, not exactly, but they blinded you to what the problems were, and to the room you had to grow."

Every passing day that realization comes to me more and more. Quitting gaming opened my eyes to all the things I've been neglecting in my life and made me painfully aware of what I was missing. 

I wish you all the best in quitting!

 

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Day 128

Worked a shorter day today. That gave me the time to head out for a decently long (2 hour) hike. While out walking I did a repeat listen of of a Udemy class on mindfulness and dealing with painful situations. After that I had a light dinner of curried chickpeas and rice. Very tasty. After dinner I went to my weekly yoga class and had a nice session. I felt like some of the movements were coming a little easier today. We focused on our lower backs. When it was over I felt very relaxed and my spine was very loose. Feeling pretty good about Yoga. 

When I got home I did four repetitions of Wim Hof style breathwork. It was a decent session but restless legs kicked in pretty fierce so I found it hard to let go. 

Now I'm typing this. I'm very tired but I don't have to be up crazy early tomorrow so I can sleep in a little bit. 

I mostly ate well today but I did have some pastries in the morning. I shouldn't have. Gotta work on my willpower. 

Anyway, have a great night everybody!

 

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Day 130

Worked a short day today and was home by 3. Ordered a veggie curry and fried rice from a nearby Chinese food restaurant and then went for a hike. Jived to a musician that I was just recently introduced to called Aurora. She is fantastic. Really made me realize that I'd been living under a rock for such a long period of time. This is the type of band that I would have gone crazy over in my past but I was too busy laser focused on video games to notice. Anyway, I've heard her now and she is wonderful. Highly recommend you check her out if you haven't already.

When I got home I did an hour of Yoga. Now I'm just about to do a session of Wim Hof breathing and then likely watch the Mandalorian. 

I did very well with my eating today. No meat and mostly no junk food. Just a Halloween sized bag of Ketchup chips. Damn them and they're deliciousness. 

Have an awesome Friday night everybody! Stay off the pixels!

 

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Day 133

Lately I've been thinking a lot about relationships. Mainly, that I don't have many close contact to anybody but my immediate family and a friend or two. I've been very aware of the time I lost while i was gaming. Most of the time I feel great but today I'm feeling a little doubtful. I'll get over it. 

I know that I have made progress in my life since I quit gaming. It's just that sometimes I feel like I've wasted too much time to truly accomplish anything with my life. Again, I know that's not true but it's hard not to have these thoughts from time to time. 

I'm also having trouble sticking to healthy eating. I do well, eat healthy for a few days, feel great and then eat like garbage the following day. Feels like I make no headway. I guess I'm just surprised how hard it it to really dedicate yourself to healthy eating habits. 

I'll get there eventually. 

Hope everybody here feels commitment and enthusiasm for quitting. 

Night

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On 11/9/2020 at 9:21 PM, MuMuMelon said:

Day 133

Lately I've been thinking a lot about relationships. Mainly, that I don't have many close contact to anybody but my immediate family and a friend or two. I've been very aware of the time I lost while i was gaming. Most of the time I feel great but today I'm feeling a little doubtful. I'll get over it. 

I know that I have made progress in my life since I quit gaming. It's just that sometimes I feel like I've wasted too much time to truly accomplish anything with my life. Again, I know that's not true but it's hard not to have these thoughts from time to time. 

I'm also having trouble sticking to healthy eating. I do well, eat healthy for a few days, feel great and then eat like garbage the following day. Feels like I make no headway. I guess I'm just surprised how hard it it to really dedicate yourself to healthy eating habits. 

I'll get there eventually. 

Hope everybody here feels commitment and enthusiasm for quitting. 

Night

What I do to keep myself motivated with my health is to focus on my goals. I visualize myself being fit and healthy when I am old. This is the dream I have been developing so that I can fight against the immediate pleasure of eating junk foods. Like gaming, there is going to be relapse along the way, but as you mentioned, you will get there eventually. I also have a daily checkmark that I will fill overnight before going to bed. One of the checkmarks is "avoiding junk foods". I am able to go over my calendar and see the days I ate junk foods. This way, I can keep track of my improvement and make myself more motivated and disciplined. 

 

 

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