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Beyond the Detox


Reno F
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@dandielionous Hey, thanks for dropping by! I had seen Smashwords before, I think I've bookmarked it for later reference; I'm definitely self publish my first books until I can make some connections on the publishing world.

Well, I can picture you writing interesting stuff. Pardon me to say it, but your journal is, by some reason, an interesting read. Perhaps you have a likeable protagonist in it :)

As for outlining, I've done it once and I'm doing it again. It helps me seeing the whole picture and find the flaws and dead ends before I have time invested in the actual writing. But you said one right thing: you shouldn't edit or review your text while you are creating it. Logic and Creativeness are in two opposite sides of the brain, and if you switch to the logic side in the middle of your creative process, you will end up breaking it.

And yea, we do this together, Ms. :)

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@Piotr I hope you can wait a little longer. I haven't touched my codes in a while, But as soon as I get to them again, I'll make a copy and show it to you.

---------------------

Last drops of creative juice

I'm trying to write a different title to every one of my posts in an attempt to intice my creativity, but today I don't want to give it much thought.

This week was solely dedicated to roleplay. I don't know what to think. On one hand, it gives me reason and energy to keep writing and it allows me to be creative and I think I'm seeing progress on my writing style. What I used to take over one hour to write, I can do now in 1/3 of the time and twice as better than before. On the other hand, will I ever start an online business of any kind? Like, these last three days I had a lot of time, and all I did was some research and a little bit of planning. I mean, on the 15th of December was my 5-month game-free anniversary. Life is much better now, but I think I reached a crossroad. Yesterday at bedtime, for the first time after I started my detox, my unconciousness came to me to have a serious talk. "What the hell do you think you're doing? Look at your bloody goals list. Do you remember them?". It raised a flag inside me.

Changing the subject: Yesterday I had two glasses of wine at dinner time. I used to drink whiskey and Brazilian alcohol once or twice a week, but recently I feel no desire to drink any kind of alcohol. Then again, my wife got two nice bottles as a present and we drank some. Funny how I got a little tipsy after dinner with only two drinks. Got reminded of how I miss going to punk rock shows, getting drunk at the entrance, going crazy in the circle pit. I lost two eyeglasses doing this, haha. Oh wait, I think I'm rambling...

Awesome things:

  • quality wine
  • heater
  • sushi
  • skype
  • beard (even though I shave everyday)
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  • 2 weeks later...

Hey, it's been a while.

These last few days I researched extensively for a way to build a community website I've been looking forward to create. My first attempt to making money online. I learnt a lot, but I still haven't found a good solution. This is kind of a shot in the dark, so I'm trying to avoid hiring a web developer, but I'm afraid it will come to that. I still have some cards to use before it comes to that.

I became lazier when it comes to waking up early. I just don't care anymore and today I woke up around 10. Fuck winter and these cold japanese buildings. Glad that it only lasts a couple of months (winter, the buildings last longer).

I also came to realize that I should complement my writing practices. Roleplay does good to narratives and descriptions, but I reckon I should also practice writing essays. I've done a lot of it at university and as an engineer, but it's been already 5 years...

I've skipped Nir Eyal's Hooked to read Stephen King's On Writing. Just-in-time learning. Hooked is still high on my read list.

Next year will be a good one, I've already move forward with plans, but I'll be out on a trip for 6 days. Taking my kindle and notepad with me, so I can keep on some habits when I get some idle time.

Happy holidays everybody!

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Hey @Reno. I have a question; what do you mean by roleplay? The first thing that comes to mind is people dressing up in weird costumes and enacting some kind of scene, but I soon figured it has to do with writing. I don't know if I'm being slow, but as another writer it got me interested. 

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@Simon E Roleplay is a kind of Collaborative Narrative. You've probably heard about tabletop RPG, right? You get together with some people, play some characters in a story made by one of the players, roll some dice, have fun with the results. When you do it over the internet, you can do it via audio+video or via text. If it is not live, you have of what is called play-by-post or play-by-email (pbem). Basically you tell a story together with other people through the point of view of one character. While many people use a tabletop rpg system to add odds to the story, I rather not use it and leave the odds to the creativity of the players. There are many sites around and you can see 'writers' of many different levels.

@Cam Adair I do have, I'll reach out!

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Hello!

I've heard that barbers in Japan are very expensive and also very precised on every client!

In Poland it takes about 15-30 minutes to make a new haircut (at least for me :D ). How different is Japan? :)

 

Btw. are you going to announce your plans/missions/goals/challenges/objectives/quests list for 2017? That could be an inspiration for others!

Greetings, Mad Pharmacist

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@hycniejsy Thanks for comming by. Haircut in a barber shop costs about 14 usd. Service is good in general, as it is in every other industry in Japan.

As for goals, sorry but I haven't planned anything special for 2017. I've got enough to work on already, there is no need to include more stuff to that list. If I'm to inspire and lead other people, I'd like to do it by being an example. Setting goals and planning your roadmap is a very estimulating intellectual activity. You might feel a good deal of satisfaction by doing it. However, that won't lead to any results if it keeps you from start doing the things you say you will. I know. I've been that guy. I don't wanna be him again.

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So, I'm back from holidays.

I got a cold while traveling. I can't remember the last time I had caught a cold before. It sucks. But I'm getting better. The good thing is that I spent most of my time reading. It was a good decision to not take my laptop with me. I'm almost finished with one book and started reading another one.

I got my working shift for January. I'll be working half of the month. Doing it for the money, but there is always room for improvement. Besides, the cash will give me access to new resources and take some of the pressure that I had on me.

Gratitude list:

  • Trains: the best public transport system
  • Wife's friends who became my friends
  • Wife's family generosity
  • Buetooth speakers
  • Jazz
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Setting goals for new year isn't necessary if you have already set goals. Don't follow the fashion of making new year statements, but just go for better life.

It's great to hear from you, keep tight @Reno F!

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Thanks guys!

@Piotr If you're still interested, have a look at the two pages that I wrote when I was studying code. I haven't touched it in a month, needless to say I was in the middle of something when I stopped (I think I was trying to make it responsive). But anyway, you said you were interested. Here are the two links. I'll pull back the links in two weeks :)

https://thimbleprojects.org/renofacundo/162917 - Sample page,

https://thimbleprojects.org/renofacundo/162921 - Simple name generator

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Today I talked on the internet with some old friends that I haven't talked in a while. Fun, but rather boring sometimes. We just don't share the same interests anymore. Still friends.

Awesome things:

  • Supermarkets
  • Telephones
  • Electricity
  • Stephen King
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Lots of new people in the forum!

Does the forum has a birthday?

These last days were spent reading and writing. Today I started writing a short story without plotting it first and the result was terrible. I got 500 words in one hour of focused work and nothing I wrote is worth reading. Plotting makes things so much easier. It is like cutting logs on the right size before you start carving your work out.

At the moment, I'm reading Brazilian classic authors. Even considering all the irregular verbs, Portuguese is still such a beautiful language. I'm stunned with rejoice when the beauty of a language and the skill of the writer steals the highlight from the story itself. I need a grammar book, asap.

Gradually I'm becoming less tolerant to the power of procrastination. I believe that it is related to the sense of purpose that I have built in the last months. I welcome procrastination when I can still be productive (when I decide to exercise to avoid sitting down and starting working on my craft). Too much entertainment is just unnafuckingceptable.

Awesome stuff:

  • Job at the hotel.
  • Fresh food
  • Vegetable juice
  • cozy socks
  • Public domain books

 

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I think it is great that you actually write stuff and not just plan(do some planning though). To be a perfectionist can really hurt you.

I stumbled over a nice idea to overcome the part of procrastination were you think that it is jsut too hard. Or that your result will suck anyway and it is not worht it. It is a simple idea. Set failure as a Goal. A selling Person should for example make  a daily goal of failed selling calls (while still trying to do their best). So a metric for a successful day would be to make 20 failed cold-calls (ofcourse there will be successes on the way). But this way you focus on the Progress and not on the results. Every real success is based on a big amounts of Little failures and lessons learned. So see that 500 words as a failure which is necessary to your seuccess! With software I'll try to adapt that idea with planning in a number of coding mistakes (I usually do that autoamtically but I still have to find them). With writing it is amybe a Little bit harder to measure something definit. But you could for example define a number of words which you'll have to delete because they would have no use in the endproduct.

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@WorkInProgress I see what you mean, but I find this focus on failure very dangerous. For me, failure is to not do something you want to get done. The result is either good or bad, but never a failure because you've done it. But thank you for your support. You always give great insights!

@Cam Adair I shall remember

@Piotr Thanks for dropping by! I don't fight procrastination. I welcome it, but I tend to get enough of it quickly. I didn't quite understand what you mean by 'my story'. You mean how I'm less tempted to procrastinate? It's very easy to me. Imagine yourself at the age of 40. How do you see yourself? How would you want your life to be? Maybe you own a nice house in the city outskirts, in a quiet nice suburb. You drive a nice car, have a lovely wife and two beautiful kids. You're a manager at the company you work. Maybe you chose a Y career and now you're a senior product designer or something like it. You might even have your own estabilished business, employing a few couple of people. You help. You are loved. You feel important. You play golf every weekend. You travel with your family every six months. Sounds reasonable, right? You don't need to be the next Bill Gates to accomplish that in life, do you? Now here comes the plot twist. Ready? Imagine you only have 5 years to get from where you are to that point. The clock is ticking. 5 years doesn't seem that long now, does it? Well, that's exactly where I'll be in a month. I'm 35 in February. 5 years to my 40th anniversary. That recommended video on YouTube doesn't look as appealing to me anymore.

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Gratitude list:

  • New penpal
  • Olive oil
  • Clean water
  • books and kindle reader
  • laundry machine
  • The Ramones
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By story I meant the one you're writing, this 500 words or any other of your writing. Anyway, this vision of change of your life in 5 years, is very inspiring.

This is so beautiful:

Maybe you own a nice house in the city outskirts, in a quiet nice suburb. You drive a nice car, have a lovely wife and two beautiful kids. You're a manager at the company you work. Maybe you chose a Y career and now you're a senior product designer or something like it. You might even have your own estabilished business, employing a few couple of people. You help. You are loved. You feel important. You play golf every weekend. You travel with your family every six months. Sounds reasonable, right?

 

This is so true:

You don't need to be the next Bill Gates to accomplish that in life, do you?

 

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Weather got colder in Kyoto, but now it is more fun because there is snow. The bad side is, with warmer sheets it is even harder to get out of bed in the morning. Seriously, this morning the world could have ended and I couldn't care less. I often write about cold. It bothers me that much.

3000 words in my short story. I might be able to finish the very first draft this week. Gotta do some editting before I request an opinion from my beta readers. Anyway, I'm glad I'm doing this. Feels so right.

I spent 30 minutes yesterday to check the annoucement of nintendo's new console. I was glad. Felt they are doing games the right way.

Gratitude List

  • snow
  • granola
  • 100 yen stores
  • coffee
  •  
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This is so beautiful:

Maybe you own a nice house in the city outskirts, in a quiet nice suburb. You drive a nice car, have a lovely wife and two beautiful kids. You're a manager at the company you work. Maybe you chose a Y career and now you're a senior product designer or something like it. You might even have your own estabilished business, employing a few couple of people. You help. You are loved. You feel important. You play golf every weekend. You travel with your family every six months. Sounds reasonable, right?

 

The goals you describe here are the common ones everybody expects you to strive for. But in my opinion this is neither beautiful nor reasonable. It's rather a trap. Let's examine it:

 

You own a nice house in the city outskirts, in a quiet nice suburb.

  • In case I don't inherit a lot of money (which I won't) I will have to take a loan, since property in such an area is quite expensive. 
  • Living in the outskirts forces me to commute to my workplace which will still be in the inner city. 

 

You drive a nice car.

  • I have to commute and I prefer the privacy and flexibility of my shiny car rather than taking public transport, thus spending quite some hours of my lifetime in the traffic jam every day.
  • Of course I want a comfortable and prestigious car which is expensive, adding more to my loan.

 

You have a lovely wife and two beautiful kids.

  • The order in which my goals are listed here is: house, car, wife, kids. So the wife comes third, right after the nice house and the car and the trait I give my ideal wife is: lovely, not loving or caring. This trophy wife does not work. She provides beauty and prestige, while I provide money and success. The side that can't deliver anymore get's replaced immediatly. 
  • Since my trophy wife spents her time in the beauty salon and the shopping mal, I have to hire a nanny for the kids and a cleaner for the nice and big house.
  • I work a lot to earn all the money that is needed to maintain all of this. So I can't spend time with my kids, but since I'm a loving father, I give them more money than they can spend to compensate for this. My kids will be spoiled and expensive. But hey, at least they are beautiful!

 

You're a manager at the company you work. Maybe you chose a Y career and now you're a senior product designer or something like it. You might even have your own estabilished business, employing a few couple of people.

  • So I'm a manager, I have my own business or whatever. I'm in charge, I lead the business, which means that I drown in responsibility and work, resulting in a 70 hour week at least. I don't have leisure time, I don't have weekends, even when I'm at home I'm at the phone or laptop dealing with my business. But I need this job to pay back the loan and I love to feel successful and important.
  • Employing people made the situation even worse. Now I'm responsible for those people too. Someone has trouble at home and is less productive at work. I have to fire him and make his situation even worse, but my company needs to stay competitive. There is no place for altruism.

 

You help. You are loved.

  • So my wife does only want my money and success and my kids don't know me since I'm never at home but they all pretend to love me.
  • I'm in the Rotary Club. I spend money for some humanitarian thing I don't really have time to concentrate on. But I know that the people in the third world I give money to do love me! Or maybe only my money?

 

You feel important. You play golf every weekend. You travel with your family every six months.

  • I feel important. That doesn't necessarily mean that I am important, but with my success with my business, my social status, my trophy wife and children and all my material stuff I can feel this way.
  • I'm playing golf every weekend. I don't really like this sport. It's quite boring, but this is what rich people do. Although it is quite frustating to get mobbed by the really rich guys. But in 10 years, when I'm 50, I will have reached even these people and show them! Isn't this a great goal for a successful life?
  • Every six month I travel to some 5 star hotel. The country doesn't matter because I never leave the hotel. I just sit at the pool with my phone and laptop and take care of my business that can't live without me even for one day. There is no time to relax when you are successful and important.

 

I have a big house, a big car and a big loan. I have a lovely wife that only wants my money and two beautiful and spoiled kids. I lead a successfull business which I need to pay back my loan and to keep my social status and I'm in constant fear that my business could collapse and I lose everything. I want to help, feel loved and important, but all I can give is my money since all my time gets sucked into my business. I have to play golf and travel two times every year, because that's what you do when you are rich and successful.

Sometimes I wish back my life when I was a young man. I had a girlfriend that loved me because of how I was and not because of my money. I had lots of leisure time and spent it with ordinary but true friends. I didn't travel further than to the next lake. I went there by bike and not by Porsche and lay there in the sun. Life was simple and beautiful.

But I can't go back. I'm already addicted to my success. I would feel horrible if I fell down the social ladder into obscurity again, where no one knew my name and my success.

 

Sounds reasonable, right?

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@Fagus thanks for commenting! these are not my plans. i just used a common idea of what would be a comfortable life on one's 40's to make a point. i also understand that you reframed basically every line of my comment to make your point as well. whether it is beautiful or not, it is a matter of perspective.

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Days are starting at 9am to me, except when I work night shifts. Not good, but not too bad. 8,5 hours of sleep on the average.

Keeping up with my 500 word count per day. First draft ready to be revised by the end of this week, I hope. Writing is my most important activity of the day and sometimes, when I get it done early I tend to relax and lose focus of everything else. I'm probably comfortable with writing 500 words per day. Going to try and increase it to 800, pushing my limits. I should also think about my next writing project. Since I'm writing short stories, I'd like to start another one right after I finish my second draft and get my beta readers to check my work. My next work will be properly outlined.

I've finished reading two books this month. Trying to get something to read whenever I'm triggered to browse mindlessly. I don't have anything to do on the internet anymore but check emails and facebook eventually. I don't know why I keep accessing YouTube. If only I was 'tubing'... Speaking of YouTube, I watched 3 gaming related videos and my start page is now filled with it. How many times do I have to tell YouTube I'm not interested in gaming videos unless I search for them on my own? The recommended video's sidebar is just stupid. I wish there was a way to leave only the search bar and the main video display. I don't even need an account.

Some awesome things:

  • Dumbells
  • Clean air
  • Dictionaries
  • Strung Out (band)
  • Workmates at my language school
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