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LordArjuna

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About LordArjuna

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  1. Day 11, Thursday 6:19 am. Non-gaming consecutive days: 3; total screen time (non-productive) since last entry: about 4 hours I don't have enough energy to be doing something all day. As I wake up before 6:00, I'm usually out by lunchtime. I don't mean that I am working physically digging trenches or anything ike that. I don't know if I am sick, lazy or what. I know that I am filled with negative emotions, especially fear. It's possible that I'm exhausting myself just with that. Yesterday I had pretty strong urges to play but somehow didn't. Didn't do much productive stuff though. Wat
  2. Fair enough, I guess I was talking about myself but thought that my ideas might help you specifically. What I should have done is post a comment into my own log that didn't specifically point at you. Than if you read it you would have "liked" and agreed or ignored it if not. I have removed the post
  3. What you describe applies to me, too. About appearing to be much more sensitive than other people to external stimuli.
  4. Day 10, 8:45; Consecutive non-gaming days: 2; total screen time (non-productive) since last entry: 2 hours Well, yesterday went well. I was able to stick to my goals, except that I watched some youtube to put myself to sleep. Both my meetings went well as well. The second one especially was very emotionally significant and may represent a breakthrough in the intense Cold War that my ex-wife has been fighting against me ever since we separated and then divorced 3 years ago. Goal for the next 24 hours: -> continue to strengthen my ability to resist urges. 1) no gaming
  5. Day 9, Consecutive no gaming days: 1; total gaming time:6-7 hours; screen time (non-productive): all of yesterday I'm on here instead of writing a business proposal for a meeting today. So I lapsed several hours after sending my 7-consecutive days post - to "reward" myself for being so good. Actually, I think a part of me is trying to sabotage any success I may have at this (or anything else). I spent all of yesterday looking through this site and watching "Science and Futurism with Isaac Arthur" (free promotion) on the Tubes. Today is going to be an emotionally challenging day
  6. Giblets, I now realise why your posts sounded familiar. Two years ago, when I was first looking at game quitters, it was your referral for Cam's program that caught my eye, as we are in somewhat similar circumstances. It's your thoughts and story of success that stayed with me and convinced me to finally give this program a serious try. Thanks. Glad you are still here, and glad to have met you in person online. Greetings from Melbourne.
  7. Day 7, Sunday 14:00. No gaming consecutive days:7; screen time (non-productive): several hours each day Just came over the line for a complete 1 week with no gaming at all. Had an upsetting and busy week with an unexpected death of of an elderly close relative. Today I am free of all obligations and alone for the first time since Monday, but despite some cravings and feeling bored and uncertain what to do with myself, I haven't reached out for games. In the last week, it also would have been easy to have done some gaming in the evenings to "deal" with the emotional roller-coaste
  8. Day 0, Suday 13:11 Consecutive days without gaming: 4; then 2 days gaming: 30 hours (approx) I am going to stop resetting my count to zero every time I relapse (from now). It feels like I'm not achieving anything and is undermining. Instead, The day count is for how long I've been making being sober a top priority. I am making changes and need to stay positive that whenever I choose non-gaming it's a win. As Cam says: It doesn't matter what you did in the past, it only matters what you choose to do now (probably not an accurate quote). Last week I faced to a number of challenges
  9. DW1909X13, How are you doing, mate? I am also starting to quit gaming after 30 years of playing, and am looking into starting a business working from home. I wish you all the best and hope to that you'll keep talking your developments. I think keeping up a regular (incognito) journal is a great way to keep honest and develop thoughts and feelings consciously.
  10. Giblets, you seem to have a lot of good advice for a lot of people, what you said to me about weekends was spot on. What has been your degree of addiction and are you "fully recovered"?
  11. Thanks Giblets, I am 30% fat and have never been into sports even as a child so when I tried c25k it was completely undoable as I would get so knackered I wouldn't be able to do anything else. It was at that point that I realised that advice for "normal" people wouldn't work for me and I have to set goals based on my actual situation, regardless how pathetic it looks to others or especially to my inner-critic self. I jog for 20 minutes + 2x5 min walk warmup/cooldown. During the jog, I actually jog for 15" per 2':30" period. If I do this 2 days in a row my legs chafe for the next couple of
  12. 16:02 Day 2 yesterday: gaming 0 hrs, screen 7 hrs (?) yesterday was productive I did a dozen small things. Then when I went to pick up my son from school some unexpected unpleasant news. I couldn't sleep at night so I wrote a strongly worded warning to the ex regarding her not living up to our agreements and putting our son in danger for her own comfort and ease. After that couldn't fall asleep until 3:00ish. Mind churn. Got up at 5:30 this morning. Two job interviews. 1st one went ok and its a job I'd be ok with doing. 2nd one I wouldn't touch with someone else's dick
  13. 9:44 am Day 1, yesterday: gaming time 0 hrs, screen time 9hrs. Goal for today is to keep busy with activities from my to do list & have 0 hrs gaming and 1 hr max screen time (non-productive). So far, I secured two job interviews for tomorrow morning. Woke up at 5:30, morning jog, shower, breakfast, reply to emails and do some admin, laundry, unpacking from a trip last week. Next, Jack Kornfield "meditation for difficult times", bioenergetic exercises, a little yoga, check government support for starting a new business
  14. Day 0, played from 4:00 till 9:00 a.m. when I decided it was time to put away the pc again. Instead watched youtube for the rest of the day. DId see some interesting videos on addiction: 3 part series from Extra Credits: Doco on Korean gaming rehab: