Schwing Posted December 20, 2016 Posted December 20, 2016 So i've gotten to a point where i can't help myself and I just grab my phone and wank. It's honestly physically difficult to stop myself. I need help!
dandielionous Posted December 20, 2016 Posted December 20, 2016 (edited) @Schwing Have you read AlexTheGrape Journal? It's a long read. But he's got this whole thing about getting up, doing ten minutes of meditation, taking a run, then a cold shower... Might be something there. Edited December 20, 2016 by dandielionous
Reno F Posted December 21, 2016 Posted December 21, 2016 I've seen some people here doing it while quitting game, perhaps @WorkInProgress if I'm not mistaken. In any case, you could also have a look at the nofap community.
WorkInProgress Posted December 21, 2016 Posted December 21, 2016 Hey that sucks. I personally had a lot of Problems wiht porn because this was/is coupled to my gaming Patterns. Basically I would sue porn while queuing. After quittign game I often used porn and as a result I fall back in abd Patterns( watching gaming replays making shitty choices etc.) I don't think that this experience is similar t what oyu are going through. Things that help in my opionion are: Wank without porn only 2-4 times a week. Reduce the masturbation frequency. Make a public commitment here in your Journal not to use porn for 30 days. Make it special if you do it and enjoy it instead just blowing some steam off. (This advice is taken in slighty adjusted out of the book Models form Mark Manson). Write down all your reasons why you don't want to use porn anymore.Read this article: https://markmanson.net/sex-and-our-psychological-needs
Regular Robert Posted December 21, 2016 Posted December 21, 2016 Before you do quit it, use it to analyze the situation. What is on your mind when you feel the urge to grab your phone and watch porn? In my own experience, this is heavily important. I have been watching porn a lot in the past years, but I reduced it to like twice in a month or even less to no porn at all. For me, it was critical to know what drives me to that point. After analyzing this drive, everything made sense. I never really enjoyed it. It was a way to blind out my thoughts of guilt, regret, doubts and so on. Instead, watching porn accelerated all these thoughts. Once you know what it is, that causes the urge, you can work on it. If you feel bad because you should have worked on a text for class but you didn't do it and use porn to blind out these thoughts, do the exact opposite. Work on the text. Even if it is only for 5 minutes. This way, you avoid feeling guilty or bad about it.To be honest, once half-addicted to porn, this world is a f#+%ed up place to be. Because sex is everywhere. That might be another reason why you feel the need to watch porn. Your generation has one mean dis-advantage: You have high speed internet right from the moment you were born. And: Nowadays, it is commonly accepted to watch porn. Kinda even worse. If seems to be a thing to do. Especially in the gaming communities you will find many puns on porn, sexual suggestive themes and so on. Even on YouTube there are many thumbnails that are basically softporn, just as a clickbait. And that sucks. But there are always ways out. Simply get to know yourself. Find out what reasons drive you to do anything. And after that, try to work on that and change it.
Mad Pharmacist Posted December 23, 2016 Posted December 23, 2016 Hey, the most important thing is, that you can't either glorify or shatter sexuality in your life.You have sexual energy no matter what you do.The clue here is what you do with this energy.You can throw it away and watch porn or masturbate. That's poor options, because you can also use this literally sexual energy to exercise, build a real man muscles and even thrive in social situation like meeting new people.Abstinence is something really important to recalibrate your brain to the type of stimulus you given to yourself with your hand. This kind of pleasure is too strong to be given to you by real woman, so if you keep masturbating, then you can have real problems with feeling the pleasure of real sex.And don't trust me or anyone here. Just try out what everyone gave you here and see what works best.Greetings, Mad Pharmacist
Schwing Posted December 24, 2016 Author Posted December 24, 2016 Fantastic help here guys I swore to myself to never watch porn ever again the other day and I haven't watched it since or felt like it. I have also been identifying what triggers my urges.
Kevin Posted January 13, 2017 Posted January 13, 2017 The porn problem was strong for me especially since I sleep in a soft, warm, sweet smelling bed. @WorkInProgress games and porn fed off of each other for me, but whatever I tell myself about the harm in games, the same will apply for porn. @RegularRobert you are right, porn and games are the norm nowadays.Both games and porn are addictive so I can say to myself, "watching porn (or playing games) won't help me, it is a never ending cycle of desire if I keep doing it." I also tell myself "the porn (or game) is rewiring my brain so that I cannot enjoy everything else in my life. Abstinence will bring back that enjoyment". When I get good at quitting games, I also get good at not watching porn.
jeetjeet Posted January 29, 2017 Posted January 29, 2017 (edited) I'm not in a position to give any advice as I'm not exactly porn free, I still wank from time to time. But it doesn't bother me now because it doesn't have much control over my life than as before. Here are some articles that may help you:http://yourbrainonporn.com/my-thoughts-rebooting-extremely-long-posthttp://yourbrainonporn.com/top-3-fatal-mistakes-rebooters-make Edited January 29, 2017 by jeetjeet
lilX Posted January 29, 2017 Posted January 29, 2017 Hey that sucks. I personally had a lot of Problems wiht porn because this was/is coupled to my gaming Patterns. Basically I would sue porn while queuing. After quittign game I often used porn and as a result I fall back in abd Patterns( watching gaming replays making shitty choices etc.) I don't think that this experience is similar t what oyu are going through. Things that help in my opionion are: Wank without porn only 2-4 times a week. Reduce the masturbation frequency. Make a public commitment here in your Journal not to use porn for 30 days. Make it special if you do it and enjoy it instead just blowing some steam off. (This advice is taken in slighty adjusted out of the book Models form Mark Manson). Write down all your reasons why you don't want to use porn anymore.Read this article: https://markmanson.net/sex-and-our-psychological-needsI always learn a lot from Mark Manson's articles
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