What did you do after quitting gaming?

[flingaas]

Hello, everyone.
I'm Fredrik, 20 years, from Norway.

I've always been a competetive person. Board games, computer games, sports, any type of competition. And I've been good! Being good at games has been part of my identity, and still is really. The guy who "becomes good at every game he plays". Give me a week and I'll beat you in a game you've played for months! That's me...

I've loved playing computer games for as long as I can remember. It's a source of entertainment and feeling of development. Gaming became pretty serious when I began playing League of Legends. I reached top 100 Europe the first season, won several local tournaments and gained a nice amount of money. Since then I've had a dream of becoming a professional gamer, only stopped by my common sense telling me computer gaming won't give me the future I am looking for (a joyful family).

Over the past three years I've also struggled with another addiction, that also being of online games: gambling in form of poker and sports betting. This has been really destructive, and I've wasted immense amounts of money. I've come to realize this is also due to my need of excitement in a somewhat dull everyday life. Sitting in front of my computer screen, I've failed to challenge myself in real life - Gambling became a quick fix for excitement and adrenaline.

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What I am really curious about is how I can use my "skills" in gaming - that I learn and improve quickly - in other parts of life. I'm active in my local church as a youth leader and I love speaking in front of people (used to hate that). However, I have no other hobbies than gaming. As everything comes quickly to me in gaming I've never had to work hard to achieve something. This, I believe, has made me lazy. I can't get myself to spend week after week in the gym, practicing the guitar or whatever. I get bored and I quit.

I wish I could find an activity that would spark something in me. An activity that I'd love doing, not having to push myself to do it. I'm intellectual; I think and analyze thoughts in my head a lot. Yet, I can't seem to figure how to be productive with that. I'm clueless of what I want to do for a living and what to study... I think starting a business would be something I could enjoy and manage well. I tried a few weeks ago, but it takes quite some effort and planning.

All I know is I wanna quit gaming, but I don't know where to start...
What did you do when you chose to quit gaming?

 

[Cam Adair]

Welcome Fredrik! 

[Simon E]

Welcome! I've also struggled with league alot, and even if I wasn't as good or as serious as you I considered myself pretty proficient at the game (usually ranked in high plat somewhere). That made it even harder to quit, since I didn't want to lose the identity this gave me (being better than all of my friends and the majority of players.)

I'm a pretty quick learner too, but I found that there's no way to get good at something real as fast as you would in a game (in a week of intense playing you can get from silver to plat in league, and suddenly you have become better than million of players. This simply won't happen in a non-virtual reality). Despite this, the rewards you get from sticking to an activity in real life is worth infinitely more, since they are real, and the game isn't (you can argue that we define what's real and meaningful to ourselves, but that's another topic.)

I think you should stick to something for more than a few weeks even if it gets boring, cause the thing is, it's often the most boring just in the beginning.

My activities are, if you need inspiration: writing, drawing, playing instruments (both piano and guitar), exercising (gym and krav maga)(right, martial arts might be something for you), and even juggling (it's fun to do something that takes literally zero intelligence once in a while - just throw the balls and catch em again.)

That's just my two cents, hope it helps!

[flingaas]

Thank you, Cam! And thank you for sharing your experience, Simon! (I realized this should've been posted in the introductions forum, my bad!)

I'm all with you on the identity struggle! Gaming has been such a big part of my life for almost 20 years. I've been the best of my friends, and it feels like gaming is "me" in a way that nothing else is! However, I know this is not true.

I think writing might be for me. I've always been decent at writing poems/songs, but never thought of doing it as a hobby. I've already ordered notebooks to start bullet journalling and keep track of my life. Also, I've bought a cycle to start working out. Maybe it's time for me to start doing things for the sake of doing them, and not to become professional at it? Might be easier if I don't expect to become great within a week.

[Simon E]

Maybe it's time for me to start doing things for the sake of doing them, and not to become professional at it? Might be easier if I don't expect to become great within a week.

I think you realized something really helpful here. You should find some activities that you love, and then the "getting good"-part will be more of a side effect than the main purpose, so you won't get bored because of a lack of results. 

And yeah, writing is a good one. There's really no limits to what you can create, and also, there's some techniqual stuff you can learn and improve on (show-don't tell, use of adverbs, active vs passive voice), which gives some structure to the process. But focus on simply having fun and not judging, and it'll be great!

Edited October 5, 2016 by Simon E

[flingaas]

But focus on simply having fun and not judging, and it'll be great!

This. Will be quite an exercise... but you're absolutely right

Thank you for great feedback!

Edited October 5, 2016 by flingaas

[Terra]

Your story is our story. Welcome!

[PrivacyActivist]

I had a lot of free time after I cut my video game time down... I have always been passionate about computers, I started gaming at a young age, 8, and I have been a PC gamer up until I quit, never to play a console game in my life (other than the PS2 but this was a very short period). I took my free time and invested the majority of it into school. Catching up on my homework and staying caught up has always been a hard task for me, when I was gaming and when I wasn't. After I have finally mastered the ability to do that, I have focused my time on learning Linux as a way to become even more productive online. It may sound silly, but my idea to quit competitive/binge gaming was to use an older Dell laptop that I had laying around... I put a new hard-drive into it, and off I went... Installing different Linux "distros". It has made my Dell usable but has also given me the chance to improve my memory, by remembering new things and learning new things. Ever since, I haven't touched a Windows computer. Windows is the OS that is most compatible with games, so I avoid it all together, plus it will bring back the old times of when I was gaming a lot...

[flingaas]

Awesome! At the end of the day, computers or games are not dangerous. It's the competetive, all-in style of playing games that stop people from doing what they really want to do! I'm happy to hear you've found something that interests you and is enjoyable! Keep it up

[WorkInProgress]

Hi I wanted to push this thread and add my 2cents because it could be interesting for new Forum members.

I personally discovered programming after gaming and found my purpose in pursuing a career in this area of expertice. I am soon finishing my chemical Engineering study's and was reall dreading to work as a classical chemical engineer.  I have actually gained a lot fo skills I can Transfer to this new career and I find that programming jsut doesn't get boring. THere is always new things, new languages, new design Patterns to learn. I am looking Forward to challenge my skills day from day in this field and work as a Software engineer

[jeetjeet]

I used to play League too, that game can be cancerous at times lol. I quit league to play other games a year before I quit gaming. Right after I quit gaming, I picked up my first self-help book and worked to improve my social and dating life. I didn't have any other MAIN hobbies other than gaming so I went and tried out new things in general. I guess you won't actually know if you like something or not until you try it. One of the things I really liked was uploading videos on Youtube and still do it as a side hobby till this day (it's been a year now)!

[Reno F]

I'm writing short stories. I am working to have self published at least 6 short stories in 2017. I have found purpose in writing and I expect to make a living out of it eventually.

[AcupunctureFTW]

A non-team, competitive sport that requires detail such as fencing might be good.

As someone who enjoyed PVP and the thrill of going against another human being in real time, fencing fit the bill nicely for me. It is nicknamed physical chess for a reason. It is considered an intellectual sport, requires analysis and planning that needs to be executed precisely and with extremely fast action.

It also takes advantage of those gamer reflexes.  You can get yourself ranked nationally if you choose to compete in rated matches, too, for "constant, measurable growth." Or just count the bruises you have at the end of each bout, lol.

[LuminousBean]

Photography is cool because it gives you the excuse to wander around new parts of wherever you live with a more critical eye, an awareness that is mindful in an artistic way.  I do some team sport stuff through Vavi (ultimate frisbee, volleyball) which is a cool way to meet new types of people.  Surfing is a really great solo sport with lots of time for contemplation in between struggling for dear life and surges of amazing weightlessness.  Brazilian Jiu Jitsu is recommended by everyone who sticks with it, right now in the first few months it is a lot of increasing my comfort zone in an unnameable variety of ways.

 

Starting a thread like this is a good idea, and you will probably already see a chorus of "you won't know until you try it", so maybe grab someone you want to spend more time with and make a pact to try one new thing each week until you find something you love.

[KevinV1990]

I started to workout more, which is probably the biggest improvement of not touch a game the past weeks. I am also writing stories, doing a creative writing course, reading a lot of books, and I am writing articles for my site.