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I kinda have days like that from time to time when IBS knocks me down good and sits a foot on my face and won't let me get up, now I just try to embrace those days and cope the best way I can, I discard my schedule and simply focus on either resting or having fun watching videos or reading, there's really just so much you can do when you get sick, so don't feel down, it's just one of those days, that's all.

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Good evening!

Finally, the Miracle has happened! I'm not sick anymore. I've now attended a couple of BJJ lessons last weekend and had a blast. I've got to work myself back into the shape I was before getting ill.

I have 4 exams this week, which is quite a lot. 300 pages to study altogether. But that is just this week. The hardest part of the year is nearly complete! I'm currently focused on schoolwork so I don't have too much time to read books. Maybe scheduling my day would help though.

My current goal is to improve socially. Mostly the focus is on creating deeper relationships. Having close friends is really important. Maybe I could even ask one girl to a date, but we'll see.

Gratitude Journal of the day

  • I'm thankful for not being sick anymore
  • Learning new languages
  • Having cool friends
  • Getting to attend BJJ classes once again :x
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Yeeeeah! 80th day game free

Today has had its ups and downs. I didn't do so well in Maths, but in the end it's just an exam. There are a plenty of worse things that could happen. I'm not feeling totally confident about my Biology exam tomorrow either but I've tried my best and that is enough for me.

I took a step today on my quest on improving my social skills. Agreed to hang out with a friend one on one which is thing I haven't done in ages really. Guess what? I had awesome time. There is something different hanging with only one person. Went to his house and drank a nice cup of tea. Then we took a walk to the city and just chatted about all things possible. I was able to just to enjoy myself and just relax.

Tomorrow I'm going out with two of my old really good friends. That will surely be fun too. Writing this, while Oasis is playing on the back, is really calming. Currently feeling positive about life altogether.

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Got all my exams done! I'm generally happy by the way they went. Anyways the worst is all over now!

I had previously planned on going to my schools chess club. I finally had the time to execute it. I had pretty nice time. Enjoyed playing the Chess but the group is maybe a bit too hardcore for me.

I tried to attend a BJJ class that is meant for a little more advanced. You probably guessed but I ended up pretty much tapping the whole training, but that doesn't really matter. Made a new friend too :).

My current goal is to improve my social skills, especially trying to create deeper relationships. Another good goal would be to create a solid habit of training BJJ.

I'm thankful for

  • Having fun training today
  • Going to spend a nice weekend with my friends
  • The week of exams is finally over, Yay!
  • Tried cooking some veggies today and fell in love with broccoli
  • Watching Arman Alizad's traveling series called the Last Crusade, always helps me to realize how good my things are
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Today we celebrated the end of the first sequence of the year with my friends. Had fun time! We listened to good music, danced and sang the Beatles together. Also switched from studying russian to physics since physics will grant me easier access to my preferred post-graduate studies.

My goal to improve my connections on personal level still is, and probably will be for a long time, my main goal. Another goal is to find a way improve the way I look at my self worth. Valuing my self worth by circumstances around me is not beneficial to my mind. I believe that having the general trust in your self worth no matter the circumstances is wiser.

My current feelings are positive. Meditation helped me to calm and let go of the negative feelings!

Today I'm grateful for

  • My musical friends! It's awesome that someone can just improv play a song! (My vocabulary is not wide enough to explain that)
  • Going to train tomorrow!
  • The colours of Autumn!
  • Scoring decent point on exams
  • Having caring and understanding family!
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Today has been a typical hangover day. Not really too motivated to do anything. I tried to make the best out of the day so I cleaned, rehearsed driving and went out to see my friends. After all the day was pretty good.

Yesterday I went out to celebrate with my friends. Had a really nice and quite intimate conversation with one of my oldest friends. As it was a party we drunk a little. I want to have alike conversation with someone when I'm sober too.

Currently I'm grateful for

  • This weekend's social interactions
  • Having had time to wind down.
  • The conversation I had with her
  • The headspace video where thoughts were illustrated as clouds
  • The good sleep I'm going to have tonight.
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Today I wasn't able to attend my BJJ class due to having a long school day. Well tomorrow I'll have time for that.

Today I decided to apply for my school's trip to CERN. It would be totally awesome to see the Large Hadron collider! My physics teacher said that I'd have near zero chances to get chosen due to not having completed enough courses last year. (I just recently decided to study physics.) Well there is a huge difference between near zero chances and none! I'll try to use all the skills acquired from "How to win friends and influence people" to convince that I'm capable of going to the trip! Traveling would be so awesome!

I think that I need some sort of plan or goal with developing my social skills. It would be easier if I would for example try to hang out with a person 1 on 1 once a week! For some reason it feels hard to invite someone, but really it's much more simple than I'm making it sound for myself. For the fact that it's hard means I'm on the right track. Doing new things always has this feeling of stepping out of your comfort zone.

Today I'm grateful for

  • The fact that there is so many good and informative books written about so many topics
  • Today has been quite a productive day
  • I'm so pumped up about the idea of traveling to Switzerland
  • Being able to learn Physics once again
  • Initiating a conversation with a random girl today
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Maybe setup a meetup you organize once a week. So once a week you organize people to get together, whether it's one person or a few you meet along the way, you organize one event each week. Maybe it's a coffee get together, maybe it's a brunch or hike on the weekend. Or a new movie is coming out. It can change. :)

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Today was a really nice day! Enjoyed my school day. We performed a play and it went well. Had a pretty nice conversation with a girl. Maybe I should ask her out! I've known her for some time but I haven't really made any bigger contact to her. By the way do you guys know any good books written about dating? Of course it might be a good idea to just go for it and learn that way.

BJJ training went well. For some reason I didn't feel as lost as I usually do. Managed to get nearly as much taps as I tapped. Well, the most important thing was that I had fun!

Today I'm grateful for

  • Doing a sport that I enjoy
  • Getting my drivers license in 4 month
  • Ordering books on the internet! It helps since our libraries tend to not have books written in english, especially the newer ones.
  • Having energy today
  • My school for teaching performing arts!
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By the way I need to ask you about meditation. I usually meditate in the afternoon whenever I feel stress or emotions that wear me down. Is meditating in the morning somehow different/have you found it better?

?I do it in the morning almost all the time, I think whenever you do it is a matter of personal preference. For me, I just really like to have still time first thing in the morning because it's usually the last still time I get during the day. I think the key is to keep practicing meditation until it starts leaking into the rest of your life. If you find joy in doing meditation at one time of the day, that is the best time for you. If you don't enjoy it, it will require willpower. If it requires willpower, you'll have a hard day one day and the habit will crumble. I speak from experience with thousands of crumbled habits under my belt.

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Today I'm just grateful ^_^

  • Tried morning meditation and enjoyed it!
  • The video Cam made about learning new things; helped me to understand the process better
  • Living in a country with good social security and health care
  • Living in a city! There are so many available activities.
  • Music! For some reason I've really enjoyed listening to music lately
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Finally completely finished Dale Carnegie's "How to win Friends and influence people". It's a good book full of good general advice. The most common tip was really being aware of how the person you are interacting with feels. Definitely a good read!

I ordered the Book called "Gorilla mindset". For some reason It just sounded good. The Slight Edge is definitely on my to read list. Maybe I'll order it too.

Grateful for

  • New journals! It's always nice to read stories and find new ideas from others success!
  • The fact that only Ringo is missing; We already have John, George and Paul
  • My snack-habit has proven to be effective. Helps me have more willpower towards the end of the day
  • Blue belt that gave me good advice today
  • The fact that it has been already 88 days since my last relapse. Last time I relapsed on my 88th day. I'm really happy that I did though, since it gave me insight and helped me decide to stick with my conclusion to move on from playing games!
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Dale Carnegie's book is a very good one! I'd say he was one of the best to persuade people. I still have to read it again to make a brief summary of it in my Evernote. A tip: you should write the most important points of the book on something that you can easily access! That's what I am doing in my Evernote. If you don't write up the most important points in a book you may forget most of them, as I did xD

Gorilla Mindset seems like a very interesting read! As Cam said, keep up with reading! For some, the moment when they started to read books was their turning point in life. I can imagine that being true.

2 more days to go!!

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