James Good

I have no idea why I don't get notifications for people commenting on my posts 🤔 Things are going okay. Which is about the best way to put it. I'm struggling with some fairly big things at the moment, both physical and mental, and it's taking a huge toll on my everyday life. I feel like a different person from who I was a few weeks ago, and not in a good way. Weirdly I've been exercising at 7am every day, I've been sleeping and eating better, my relationships are better and I'm working harder. But, no matter what I do, I just keep getting worse and worse. Its been a gradual decline over the last few months. I'm going in to get some blood work done soon, I think low testosterone could be a culprit, especially given a few other *ahem* symptoms I've been experiencing so we'll see how it goes. I'll probably post an update on how things go, but for now I can't muster up the motivation to get a regular journal done.

I wish I had the realisation that gaming was a problem back when I was 16, that's amazing! Some great goals to get started with, looking forward to seeing your journey on the forums 😄

Quick update: Got food poisoning few days ago and have been basically bedridden and unable to spend much time looking at screens. Will post again tomorrow now that I'm feeling better.

100% agree! And yeah I've gone through plenty of morning routines for the last few years, I recently created this for GQ: https://gamequitters.com/morning-routine/ I think finding a couple of things that are pretty simple, as you said, is the best route for me.

Day 8, what's there to hate? Nothing, is the answer... I woke up at 7:20am again but hoooooooooly hell I feel 10x better. I'm excited to start the day now. This is great. I need to work on my morning routine (funny that I release an article and a podcast a week ago about this topic but whatever) Did I atone for my previous day's failures? Nope. I had the opportunity to. I spent the evening working/chatting at the nearby bar at their outside sitting area. It's great because it doesn't get busy until 9-10pm, the music is good, and the people are great company (one of them is the girl I'm into which you can read about further back). And no I wasn't drinking, I don't think I'd get any work done if I had a beer haha. But at one point a group of 3 really attractive girls came in to pick up their friend for his birthday (I think? Thai's are difficult). The one I was into the most kept giving me the eyes, and when I went past her I should have just said hey but I kept quiet. I hadn't been feeling good all day, partly due to me not showering, my hair being greasy and running out of deodorant etc and partly because I was just tired/weak/ill. Not a good combination. I remember not wanting to interact with anyone yesterday regardless of who they were. I wasn't as friendly as usual and I wasn't feeling confident at all. Whether or not that was partly to blame - those root issues I'd already instilled in myself before the day began - I have no idea. Regardless, today is a new day. Today I feel amazing. Today is my day. Peace. Oh, and an update on that girl I'm into. I spent a good few hours with her and her colleague and it was just a great time. I stopped seeing her as a potential partner and just enjoyed her company, and it was great. We laughed, played games, learnt Thai/English, teased each other and whatever else friends do. Glad I decided to carry on staying friends with her!

For some reason I don't get notifications when people reply to this journal, but I do when they like a message 🤔 I'll look into that... Yeah I've had a tendency to beat myself up over failures, simply due to being naturally talented and getting annoying when things don't work out. It's all a journey though, and I'm just happy to be a part of it.

Day 7, a fall from heaven. (idek i'm just trying to rhyme) I'm gonna be honest, I didn't approach anyone today. I had some fun conversations with people, but nothing I would call a 'cold approach'. Why? I have no idea. Either I got caught up in everything else and put it to the back of my priority list, or I stopped framing it as an essential thing I need to get done. I've been super tired recently, haven't been sleeping much and I get to bed at around 3am and waking up at 11am. So last night I wanted to change it. I was in bed by midnight, and I woke up at 7:30 this morning. It's maybe not quite as early as I'd like, as I'm not starting work until around 8:30 (writing this at the moment), but it's a damn sight better than starting at 1pm! However I think it'll be worth it. Even if today I feel weak and achy. Nothing coffee can't fix! Unless I'm ill.... In which case ignore everything 😄 Regardless, I'm gonna try and make up for yesterday's 'failure', and you'll see how I get on tomorrow. Peace.

Exactly. Usually the best way to find some of the better girls is through someone else. It's also perfect for the whole "oh yeah my friend's gorgeous and smart and and amazing and you'll love her" when in reality she's nothing like it 😂

Pick 'n mix, day 6! (Do you have pick 'n mix in the USA? I have no idea...) Today I finally managed to do something I'd been trying to do for ages, I've just been a big dummy. A little backstory. Not long after getting to Chiang Mai I went to a bar nearby, and got chatting to the bartender. I knew I liked her pretty much straight away, and it was obvious she was at least semi into me. I always go for the artsy types, not too sure why. Anyway, I always had my suspicion that she had a girlfriend, so I just put it to the side of my mind and kept chatting to her for the following weeks/months while meeting other girls. Well last night, I finally got her number to arrange a photo-shoot/food/language lessons (we've become pretty good friends during this time) and as it turns out... She has had a boyfriend for the last 4 years. Initially I was a bit annoyed, after all I was really into her. I've also really struggled having friendships with girls that I'm romantically interested in. But I'm trying not to jump to conclusions straight away. She's super cool, we get on really well, and I'll be moving on from the city at some point so it's not like I need to stay attached to the place forever. There are other girls, so I'm just going to try and enjoy it for what it is. A great friendship. I'm excited to see what happens.

Don't get me started haha!

Thank you for reading! That's awesome. How long did you spend here? Anything you'd recommend? I don't really want to leave, but I'm making myself travel Asia a bit more before I truly settle. Thanks again, you too! 😊

Nah he's a tyrant and a bully 😉 I'm sure he can talk more about routine, but what separates Cam from a lot of other people is his ability to consistently work on something for a really long time without getting burnt out. His work ethic is super impressive. I think in this case we were both just super in the zone, no talking to each other, and knew exactly what we needed to do.

What a time to be alive, day 5! (yes, this is now a thing) Recovering from the impromptu night of yesterday, today was pretty slow. I did my usual routine of heading out to a coffee shop, but I couldn't bring myself to work. I had an interview coming up that I would rather have done without, and I felt like I was just killing time until then. Which I did. I did eventually sort out my lack of work with a 4 hour session of pure focus with Mr Cam Adair at a 24 hour cafe in Chiang Mai. I've never done so much work in my life. Anyway, what did I do during the day to build my confidence? Nothing major. I made a bit of conversation with some girls eating nearby at dinner. I added an extra line or two when ordering things in coffee shops or restaurants. Like I said, nothing major. However, it's better than nothing. Every action, no matter how small, will help over time. I'll aim to do something bigger tomorrow! Peace.

Hahahaha thank you! I'll try not to 😉 Plan on keeping these going for the month, and then who knows what'll happen! Yeah, sounds about right. 100% agree that guys are friendzoning themselves, although there are definitely times where it's just much better having them as a female friend. I've had a ton of female friends in the past, and I've made some great ones since coming here. I think when you're in relationships all the time it's a lot easier to talk to and make friends with women. On a side not, I don't understand the mentality of a lot of guys online who say "if you have any female friends you're a beta bitch". I mean, you get rid of literally half of the entire world. As a result you miss out on so many rich experiences that would have otherwise been amazing. If anything it says a lot more about someone if they're not able to make female friends haha!

Quick update to day 4, a couple hours after writing it I was editing the photos I took at the bar where I played music and ended up spending the night with a group of really friendly Thai people (and one Japanese)! After I finished editing, I was enjoying the live music in the bar, when I heard them speak Japanese. So, as someone who spent some time learning Japanese and wants to visit next year, it was the perfect opportunity. I just turned round and looked at them, and before I said anything one of the girls said "Hey, where are you from?" Turns out that's all it takes to to make you stay up drinking until 3 AM with them on a whim 😄 I didn't get wasted, it was just fun to talk to them and have some fun conversation. One of them is an English language teacher, which made things 100x better as she was able to translate everything. Great end to a great day!