Theresa

Day 44 I am very happy to have quit gaming. After being sent home from college senior year last March because of the pandemic, gaming was my alternative to accepting this. When I was hoping to quit, one question I always asked was, will I be a happier person? Yes, deciding to act rather than withdraw into gaming has combatted many of the anxieties or fears I had. So far I have been able to do a much better job at work, cultivate better relationships, and become more financially stable. I have found making a general daily schedule to be very helpful. It helps fill those time voids especially after work when I would resort to gaming and it also gives me small goals to accomplish, satisfying that desire for achieving or concrete progress. I have felt triggered because of stress and resorted to watching a YouTube video of the game update, but I have no intention of downloading the game ever again. Gaming addiction really promotes a crippling worldview. It changes your perception of reality. You perceive accomplishment and perhaps some societal customs through these artificial experiences where there is no congruity between the character development in game and character development in real life. It’s a disservice to your real talents and to your unique person in real life. I’m really grateful for this community. Knowing that there really are others who are also struggling and fighting the same addiction gives me so much hope and inspiration. No one is alone in this journey! Hope you’re all well and rooting for you!

Welcome CG and all the best with your awesome journey!

Good luck with your book “Good Enough.” That is really neat you’re writing one of your own and I look forward to hearing more of your progress with it!

Good job on staying away from YouTube and the games. Best of luck on your journey!

Welcome @cham0mil5! I look forward to hearing more about your journey. What is this dream you have?

Day 30. Hope you’re all well and rooting for you 🙂

@TheNewMe2.0 yes, becoming the first doctor in the family would be awesome. I won’t say that thought didn’t cross my mind. With the PsyD one can have a private practice and teach, no? I’m in contact with some admissions counselors to get clarity on that. My dream is to get a 50% scholarship they offer. Day 21 Work has been crazy this week I feel sorta restless. I’ve been trying to stay on top of journaling and completing the tasks I schedule in my planner, but often I only get 1 or 2 done. I gave up on the ice shower because I’m weak and kept hyperventilating lmao, but reading and jogging have been splendid. I haven’t really been craving which is good but I miss the online friends.... anyway hope you’re all well and I’m rooting for you as always!

I think that’s wise to quit that type of meditation especially if it’s cracking into a goal or discipline that you have been succeeding in. Two contrary things both can’t be good for you. Glad the MRI went well. What happened that you sustained such an injury? yes, I’m sure it must be frustrating to be dependent but honestly at least you have someone who can help you out a bit. You give great practical advice and seem very intuitive which I think are excellent factors in counseling. All the best with discerning.

Thanks for the support and encouragement @TheNewMe2.0. I really appreciate your being here. Yah I’ll experiment with this and see what happens. All the best with your student debt. I’m sure it’s a lot and the idea of grad school debt makes me feel sick, but I’m sure over time you’ll come out even and you’ll find your Ma useful and fulfilling.

You’re being honest with yourself for recognizing your limitations and tendencies. Sometimes it’s easy to set goals that are too high or not realistic at the time, and that’s ok. I totally understand the pressure of time logging. You feel more inclined to veg because there is this constant urgency because of the plan you have made for yourself. Have you heard of the monk manual?

All the best with everything and thank you for sharing your experience and ideas.

It sounds like you’re stressed with school, understandably. Stress can definitely cause triggers. I’m not sure what your interests are but maybe you can find some sort of hobby that is relaxing. Not to undermine your good efforts in studying, but everyone needs to recreate at some time after serious work. Way to go!

Sorry to hear about the bullying. Of course you didn’t deserve it and it wasn’t your fault, but sometimes people just suck and who knows what insecurities they have such that they need to project it onto someone else. I’m really excited to read your book! That’s awesome and really cool you’re writing one.

Day 19 Im going to post less, but everything has been going pretty well. I feel so much more alert and less anxious with this detox so far. Going for a jog before and after work really helps with the tension and stress of the day. I was talking with some friends about video games and one friend shared how there was this mother who was really tired because she was raising the kids all day and she asked her husband to hold the baby for like 10 minutes so she could change into pajamas or whatever; and he responded, “No! I’m in the middle of something!” I recognized myself in that story, rejecting family and friends who really needed help so that I could play my video game; and this is another motivator. I don’t want to be that person anymore or ever again. I don’t want to be so absorbed in a hobby or entertainment that it takes priority over immediate family or friends. I don’t want any relationships to be wrecked because I need to level up or “help” my “friends” in game. I also feel responsible and guilty for being and accomplice to all the others who I played online with. Some had kids other were students etc. but we were all logging onto this communal addiction which indeed deprived each of us from cultivating relationships right there before us in reality. I’m reading this book which proposes the theory of the “slight edge.” Basically one’s every day actions, especially the small repetitive ones, over an extended period of time can be compounded into success or failure. If one performs an action that is beneficial to him in some way and continues to do so, his growth and success will increase slowly but as more time passes, the increase in his growth will be exponential, like compound interest. The same applies to bad habits, the outcome being years of compounded negative action. I like this theory because it appeals to that longevity which character development and habit building evoke. Change doesn’t happen overnight, but by doing a single good action such as reading 10 pages every day or doing one thing that you’re afraid of every day, after 3 years, the results will be phenomenal. Anyway those are my latest thoughts. I hope you’re all well and rooting for you as always!

Way to go, keep it up! Regarding YouTube, if you want to cut it completely, then delete it or use an app blocker like Freedom. I recommend uninstalling it though. Getting a planner and timestamping your day the night before is really helpful. Not only can you be more productive but also you can fill in all those downtimes, when you might watch YouTube, with other activities, hobbies, or tasks.