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30_yrs_of_gaming

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Posts posted by 30_yrs_of_gaming

    This is Where I Fight - This is Where Gaming Dies

    in Daily Journals

    Posted · Edited by 30_yrs_of_gaming

    I am moderately gaming now. I am in a relationship with an amazing woman that loves me. She loves me as a sinner and as a saint. I don’t let my hobbies interfere with my relationship or work or health.

    You can get so engrossed in anything that you’re not self aware. If you’re not taking care of you then you can’t love anyone else right either.

    Someone here needs to go back and read my story. It does get better. You can do this. Others are here to help you.

    You are not alone.

    • Like 3

    This is Where I Fight - This is Where Gaming Dies

    in Daily Journals

    Posted

    Post 90 Day Detox Notes

    How did I succeed on the cusp of such a great personal trial?

    1.) Removing all games from my immediate vicinity. 

    2.) Choosing to take opportunities to advance at work. 

    3.) Making time to engage people whether on this forum, on the phone, or publicly.

    4.) Experiences like travel, reading, working out or whatever. Replacing time spent on games with other activities. 

    5.) Reflection through prayer, solitude, and quietness. Basically, learning to embrace being alone to some degree.

    Thank you @Cam Adair and everyone else for this forum and the inspiration provided in your materials. 

    I honestly think I will continue gaming somewhat in the future, but never to the degree that I did before. Life is short and there is so much else to experience.

    There are still some huge obstacles that I am facing concerning my personal life, but I have a renewed focus and higher level of self awareness.

    I have met a kind woman that communicates well and loves me. I am receiving promotions at my job. I lost myself and found myself all over again. 

    Gaming didn’t destroy my life. I was spiraling out of control and fell into gaming heavily because of several other motivators. Now, I see better what led me here and where to go from here. 

    There are things we can change and things we cannot change. YOU ARE IN CHARGE OF THE DECISIONS THAT YOU MAKE. Choose wisely. Live without regret by doing the best you can. Enjoy life.

    I have been playing games off and on for the past 30 years. I have had times where I did not play for months at a time because of other interests or the demands of life. 

    I got out of order. This detox helped me a whole lot, but it’s not a magic formula. It all boils down to the discipline of choices we make every single day. 1% changes have ripple effects that help us and spill over into other people’s lives. 

    If I can do this then ANYONE can. I did it in the midst of some great adversity.

    Challenge yourself. Get inventive about it. Get angry if you have to. Cry. Be who you are. Embrace the struggle. People here will help you. But YOU have to want this for you. 

    Thanks again.

    • Like 6

    This is Where I Fight - This is Where Gaming Dies

    in Daily Journals

    Posted · Edited by 30_yrs_of_gaming

    Day 89 - Game free. 

    Well, I’ve been out of town for work a lot these past few months. I have lots of work to do to prepare for winter at home.

    This divorce has been a hard hit. Miss my children. 

    Going to keep training and leveling up at work. Talking to a new woman that is good at communicating and has similar values. 

    My guild mates in a game I’ve played a lot want me to come back. One day at a time...

    I’ve changed a lot these past 3 months. I’ve had lots of challenges and feel good about the direction my life is going at this point. Yes, some things are still raw, but I’m having small wins every day. 

    Improving my cooking, working out, getting opportunities at work, feel more attractive as a person... 

    If I can do this then anyone can. Take courage.

    • Like 4

    Dear Diary...

    in Daily Journals

    Posted · Edited by 30_yrs_of_gaming

    I didn’t read a whole lot of your story, but there are two things that stood out that may be helpful.

    I get two impressions fairly quickly. 

    One is that you tend to overthink a bit. That contributes to your anxiety or stress. I am a thinker too. Analytical to a fault. Rock climbing and boxing helps you manage your mind. It’s okay.

    Two, this over thinking sometimes has you being too hard on yourself to achieve or attain. Contentment is something you seem to discover when you sort of lose yourself in living in the now. 

    I think dating and having this perspective from a good female is going to totally be a great opportunity for growth as well as companionship. 

    Best wishes. Keep up the great work.

    • Like 2

    This is Where I Fight - This is Where Gaming Dies

    in Daily Journals

    Posted · Edited by 30_yrs_of_gaming

    On 9/4/2019 at 7:53 AM, Lea said:

    Hi, I am Lea. Are you writing poetry? Me too. After I read your last few posts, I am happy that you made progress in your goals. I may not be you, but I can feel the pain you went through with your family issues. Keep up with the good work and don't push yourself too hard. ?

    Yes, I am writing poetry again after a 13 year famine. I’ve done about a dozen or so in the past several weeks. 

    Thank you for reading my story. I hope something I said helps. Sometimes I get too zealous and then I do push too hard. Thanks for the reminder. ?

    • Like 2

    This is Where I Fight - This is Where Gaming Dies

    in Daily Journals

    Posted · Edited by 30_yrs_of_gaming

    Day 78 - Wow. Killing it. One day at a time...

    You can do this. Whoever you are reading this. Get to a place where you put all your gaming stuff completely beyond your reach. Bury it in the backyard. Whatever...

    My success has been largely in part to being physically removed from temptation except for my phone.

    Worth considering if you are struggling out there.

    • Like 5

    This is Where I Fight - This is Where Gaming Dies

    in Daily Journals

    Posted

    Some thanks are in order from folks here that have showed some interest in me in some way. Thank you. @Ikar, @ElectroNugget, @TimetoWalkAway, @Splitstep, @DaBest, @NannerZ, @George Wyatt, @fawn_xoxo, @asquerade, and anyone else that I may have missed. @Cam Adair, when I get to my 90 day mark, I’d like to give another testimony and list some books and habits that have been helping get through this detox. 

    • Like 7

    This is Where I Fight - This is Where Gaming Dies

    in Daily Journals

    Posted

    Day 70 - I have never made it this far. Wow. So I’ve been writing poetry every other day for the past two weeks. I’m getting perks at work. My ex has no more power over my heart and mind. Making small wins. Sometimes I regress, but overall I’m still getting stronger. 1% changes have ripple effects. Someone reading this needs to go back and catch up on my story for inspiration. If I can then ANYONE can.

    • Like 5

    This is Where I Fight - This is Where Gaming Dies

    in Daily Journals

    Posted

    Day 65 - Game free!

    I’m back home. Work is sending me right back out to a remote locale. Exciting. I will be finishing my detox there. 

    Got my laptop back from warranty. Tonight will be a real test, but I have plenty to keep me busy before my flight in the morning.

    One day at a time... Have had a few conversations with women that were nice.

    • Like 4

    This is Where I Fight - This is Where Gaming Dies

    in Daily Journals

    Posted

    Day 39 - No gaming.

    Unimaginable. She has been my home for the majority of my adult life. Now, I have no home. I can’t explain what I feel.

    I had some quality time with the kids last night. Every day is a trial. Every day is a new experience for me. 

    This week is going to be a great challenge.

    I’m preparing for the best.

    • Like 2
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