giblets

@Mettermrck..... Sydney?

Using your gratitude points, have you got a plan for what you want to use your newfound savings for? I find sometimes if I get a little down seeing my friends out buying stuff or having great times and I am not, that I remind myself why I am saving my money. Whether that be for a house, a holiday, or to treat yourself to something rad. It works!

16 Aug 17 Days to go: 243 It can be, @Mettermrck, you just need to be deliberate in the podcasts you listen to. If I find I am listening to a podcast just for the sake of it or I am not paying full attention to it because I am not sucked in, I skip it. A podcast can only be skipped 3 times before it is removed from my list. I didn't run yesterday, I felt really drained at lunch time and after work is always complicated. When I was too drained last week to run I reflected on it to try and not get down about my progress and worked out that I was depressed which was causing me to not have any energy. I was hoping my work week broke that, but here is that feeling again, almost the exact same point in the week. It's not lingering from the weekend long run either because I didn't really do a long run this week, just the race. I will be fine, the last few times I have got like this it was because I felt bored and trapped at work with no light at the end of the tunnel. But there is light at the end of the tunnel - I start the sweet job I wanted and got in less than 12 months - so I just need to sure I keep my business in order until then. I was contemplating putting a counter up in my office to keep me going, but I think that would be more like wishing my life away. While I do feel bored and trapped at work I need to remember the positives - the flexibility, the hours, and the fact I get to see my son far more than I have with any other job. I don't think it's a social craving either, as I got over that problem by skyping my friends as much as possible now, and they enjoyed it too and commented that we need to do it more often because it is so easy for everyone to commit to, especially when some of them are out of town. Plus I get to annoy you guys too Maybe its also because I am slipping a bit behind with my studies because I am trying to do so much right now. Apart from that nothing much to report from yesterday. I haven't done my video blog for two weeks, I might try and fit it in today. The thoughts of gaming have crept into my mind a lot, especially about Doom, but I won't let myself fall to it. I have contemplated playing in moderation lately, like I think everyone does either in the detox or after it, but I just can't justify giving it the time. There are too many other things to do, and I will make sure I keep doing them before I even think I have time for games. Grateful corner Some people are just so freaking nice. It does not cost anything to be nice, yet it seems to escape the majority of people. I spoke to quite a few customer service reps yesterday and they were all so kind and nice that it had a resonating effect on me for a while. I wonder if these people know the effect they have on others. I appreciate it after a tough day, and it reinforces the thought that I also need to be nice more.

This. This is the best motivation to use to get you started mate! Continuing on from this, its when developments are happening in world news and you have no idea what they are talking about as well. It's like World War 3 could start right out your doorstep and you would have no idea.

Glad to hear you are still going strong @Moegli! Just think of the light at the end of the tunnel!

15 Aug 17 Days to go: 244 Running is as easy as it sounds @BigPete247! You don't need to start out running wanting to be a sprinter or a marathoner or expecting to have speed likes Usain Bolt. Running is running, just one foot after the other. Just you, your mind, and the road. Before you know it you will start to see gains. So many people are afraid to start because they thing they will be "bad' or it will be "painful". Even if you're out there for 5 minutes and doing the hot shoe shuffle, you're still running. Had a great chat with @Cam yesterday, and I think I'll try to make a video about it today. It made so much sense - I am always trying to push my boundaries, and I have been when I was a kid. Not because I wanted more money or more achievements, I just wanted to do more. A great example is running after I did the half-marathon last year for charity, as soon as I finished most people were saying "never again". All I could think of is "when does the full marathon start?" I think I registered the very next day for the marathon in 364 days time. Same as when I was playing games, I could beat the game, sure, but can I do it faster? Can I do it with less lives? Can I do it with a higher score? I guess that is why I got into speedrunning so much. I thoroughly enjoyed it for those reasons. Now in my life I am trying to do more every day, be more productive, read more, listen more, lead more. I listen to podcasts on 2.5x so I can fit more in. I listen to audiobooks at 2x so I can get through more books. I use to do lists and systems so I can complete more at work. When I sat down with my leadership coach last year and tried to work out what was driving me and therefore why I do the things I do, after about three months I worked out it is because I want to be valued, by my family and by my friends. If I can do more I can be valued more. Anyway, the whole point of that rant is I am always living on the edge and never settling, and sometimes I translate that uncomfort into stress, which is what I am feeling right now with my life. I assume that my coping mechanisms have taken a bit of a hit, but I think the reality is I am probably just tired or need to fix up my nutrition. I know I can't take the foot off the pedal because then I get the feelings of guilt, being unproductive and become unhappy. I am like Keanu Reeves in Speed, need to keep the bus above 50! I contemplated flying to another city this weekend that is doing a half-marathon. I got the taste again from the city2surf on the weekend, and want to do longer races and in events. I found that the event let me push harder and enjoy what I was doing a bit more, even if I had to dodge so many people. I don't think I will end up flying to this other race though, I had already organised a few things this weekend to do and I don't really want to cancel or change them, I tend to cancel too many things these days. Will go back to the drawing board and see what I can find for next weekend. I think part of what is driving me as well is I have decided to collect as many medallions as I can from these races. Usually they sell merchandise or photos or other stuff, which you look at or enjoy for about a day and then it just clutters up the house. But they also give you a medallion for finishing the race. I saw an idea for a board on twitter to display them all on the wall and it looks amazing, so I am going to collect all mine and do the same. In the long run it will not only save me money from not buying all the extra junk, but it will be something that I can be proud of. Just remember to put on sunscreen next time... Spent far too much time yesterday researching Doom and Doom mods. While it amazes me that there are still communities dedicated to these old games and keeping to breath life into them, the result was I got barely any study done. I didn't end up getting involved in last week's debate so I really need to get in there this week, and reading about Doom mods is not helping at all. Even just writing about it now is derailing me a little. Push those thoughts out, and get back to reading academic journals for study. This is the point where I would run to clear the mind pretzel but it will have to wait until lunchtime. Grateful corner Work flexibility. I have probably been grateful for this before so am just retreading an old topic, but I can attribute a lot of my success this year with personal development and running down to how flexible work is. I try to go to work half an hour early and minimise my breaks so I can run over lunch and not have to rush back after a shower. There are few jobs that you can do this with, and it is the first time I have been able to do it. It will be a challenge in my next job but I will do my best to still find a way. It has definitely put a lot of things in perspective, and I will endeavour to be as flexible as possible from my team with their requests as well.

Pick up your game mate? What a spud. I really wish some people could just step out of their bodies for a minute and see how poor of a leader they are. I compare the 1% chance to when I was playing WoW and what made me give up - the random drops. I'd spent an hour or three doing a dungeon or a raid hoping to get the 15-30% drop of an item.... and it doesn't. Then I would feel so guilty for the next few hours or days about how much I just wasted those hours of my life with nothing to show for it. That was the straw that broke the camel's back for me. Choose some activities where you have something to show for your time, no matter how small it is.

You have it in the bag this time around!

Just don't start snorting sugar Bob! If you stay away from sugar long enough that when you have some again for the first time in a while it repulses you. I can't stand sugar anymore, and I don't have a hidden secret of how I became like that, I just stopped eating it and my brain rewired after a while.

@MmmWatermelon summed it nicely Tom. When I get angry at work I shut the door (or find a quiet place) and try to work out why I am getting angry, what is causing me to overreact. The majority of the time is because I am emotionally attached to the task at hand for whatever reason, whether I have a personal interest in a task or person, or I have spent a lot of my own energy in a project so don't want to see it go. Pausing and reflecting like this has helped me a lot. If I need to calm down or I can't calm myself down, I change my environment. 90% of the time for me that is going for a run for an hour. I'll then come back and reattempt the problem. What may also help is a worksheet. I use a worksheet for anxiety to fill out when I am not feeling well in order to try and find the root cause of the problem rather than get angry at myself. You might benefit from one as well, it has 5 questions on it like "What is the problem?", "What was happening before you felt like this?", and "What needs to happen next?" It really helps break down the problem into smaller items that you can influence.

14 Aug 17 Days to go: 245 So yesterday was the run/race, which required me to get up early and catch a bus to the start line before all the roads started closing. As a result, I didn't get around to my journal post, but it was still a good day. There were so many people in the race that it was almost unbearable. Approximately 80,000 people participated. Ever tried to run in the middle of 80,000 people? It's hard work. I was constantly dodging people and trying to find gaps to run. I really hope that there isn't so many people trying the marathon later in the year or I am going to have a hard time hitting my stride or desired speed. I ended up aiming for a goal of 90 minutes or less, and achieved 79 minutes (5:45min/km), so I am quite happy with that. When I got to the half way mark I realised I was not going fast enough at all, that I was sitting in my long distance speed so was wasting a lot of time and picked up the pace. Felt like I almost sprinted the second half. Anyway if I had done that from the start I might have been able to qualify for the next group up which has less people in it and would make it easier to run, but I missed the qualifying time by about 2 minutes (5:30min/km). Knowing that I will not meet the time in the marathon either I am thinking of travelling to another race somewhere here in Aus to get a qualifying time. I talked to a few mates about the idea and they think I am crazy and just chasing medals! (not sure if I talked about my medal board idea on here yet) Of course all that meant to me is I must be doing the right thing if everyone thinks I am crazy The rest of the weekend was really great. I need to work on my triggers again, because the smallest things keep me reminiscing about my old handhelds (GB, DS, etc). I think it is all the research I have been doing on Raspberry Pi zeros for projects etc. So many people have used them to build handhelds it makes me wonder if they are used for any actual projects like the foundation designed them for! I managed to finish soldering together my son's white noise maker, now I just need to setup the software on it. I hope I can get that finished this week sometime. It is another busy week ahead of me. I didn't get as much study last week as I should have so there is that to do, as well as do some online posts, plus a few people at work are sick so I need to cover for them as well. Just keep swimming just keep swimming.... Had a nice Dad-Son day on Saturday. We went to a cafe and and had coffee and cake in the morning, then to a nearby park to run around and be crazy. Was a lot of fun and definitely something I need to do more often. It was quite humorous to see all these kids running around the park enjoying all the equipment, and then about 1 metre behind each of them was a parent shuffling their feet. It is like they had a pet! Finally got the xbox up online for sale. Within an hour I had sold the extra controllers, now waiting for someone to snap up the console! Aim for today is to be as productive as possible and not lose control of my emotions during what is going to be a stressful day. I hate Mondays. Grateful corner Playgrounds. Some serious money and effort goes into building these for public use. It must be a great feeling building them knowing that thousands of kids are going to have a lot of fun climbing all over them and pretending they were ship captains or pirates or just forgetting about their worries for a while or if they are having a tough time with some things. There are many kids out there that don't have access to a safe playground so I feel for them.

I've been trialling etar since you mentioned it and it's working fine!

Welcome @BigPete247! I bet you're actually small

Ready Player One was a fantastic book, I thoroughly recommend it. I listened to it on Audible and instead of "couldn't put it down", I "couldn't press stop"!

That's because I'm going bald

My desktop is a $50 Raspberry Pi 3. Absolutely love it.

12 Aug 17 Days to go: 247 @Mettermrck & @Vlad - break as in I need to slow down and smell the roses now and again. I am pushing myself constantly to achieve which is great, but I came to the realisation last week that it is slowly crushing me. So, I guess out of it comes twofold, I need to improve my stress coping mechanisms, and secondly I need to fit in some meditation or similar during the week that I can give myself mini-vacations. I listened to a podcast last night on the plane that was talking about people with ADD and how they always need to stay busy and generally don't think about how little time they give other people (aka family) and I was quite moved by it 0 because essentially that is me. Following on from @Cam's video of "just in time learning", as soon as I got home I made my wife the #1 priority and just sat and talked with her, without trying to multi task or do anything else. It was great and we both enjoyed reconnecting with no agendas or anything else going on. So I'm back from my work trip which was fantastic. I got to play around with the new software we will be using for work as well as catch up with some old friends. There was still a sense of stress as I was trying to complete an assignment that was due yesterday (which I managed to). I had some mixed feeling about my study, as the trip made me remember why I withdrew my last degree, I felt like I could not relax and enjoy time with friends and family as I was either thinking about how much study I needed to do, or I was cancelling on them so I could go study. But the innocent questions from my friends and the discussions about it reminded me of why I was pushing on with it and reinvigorated me. I do enjoy studying and learning new things and I have wanted this degree for a long time, it is going to be beneficial to me in the long run. So I am gritting my teeth and pushing on. On a long enough timeline, everything is ephemeral. What I took away from the whole balancing/discussion over the last few days is I need to get better at stress management. Either my skills in this area have taken a hit (I scored 85% in stress management in the recent personality test I did) or they are being worn down from my productivity kick of go go go. Both are possible. Some reflecting is required I think, as I have had a couple of outbursts at work as a result which I need to cut out - they are not professional and it is burning relationships with my colleagues. Still haven't sold the xbox - but not because I don't want to! I have been prioritising other activities over it. But, there is good news, I have now sold $1000 worth of my extra devices floating around the house, including another console. I am quite happy with myself, I am decluttering and making a few bucks on the side as well. I originally thought of buying a new laptop with all the money, but then the minimalists popped in my head. If I hadn't wasted the ~$1500 to buy all the devices in the first place, then I would be able to work two weeks less! That's two weeks wages I have spent on essentially nothing as I barely used those items. So I am not going to get a new laptop - the one I have had for about 3 years now is still working fine. I don't use it to play games, its purpose is to word process and surf the internet, which is does fine, and it only cost $180! So that has been $60 a year so far, what a bargain. The only thing that grinds my gears about it, which is why I have wanted a new laptop, is that it runs Windows and not linux. I just don't trust Windows. But I convinced myself I don't need to run linux, I just need to type and study, which can be achieved by Windows. Anyway I think I know the market price for my xbox now after a bit of research so I hope to put it online today. Today is going to be another busy day but it should only take a couple of minutes, so I will endeavour to get it done after this post before my son wakes up. city2surf run is tomorrow. I haven't exercised since Monday, so that is a 5 day break, probably the longest I have had since I came down hard with the 3 week flu. The break was because of a combination of things, even though it might sound like I am making excuses (and I might be). I was really drained at the start of the week so I was concerned I was coming down sick again just before the race, so I wanted to use the energy to stay healthy. I worked out it was because I was feeling depressed instead though, and I think I am through that little speed bump, thanks to the work trip. After that I travelled which took out a day or two, and then it became rest just before the race so I am not sore. Hopefully I'll make up for it by going hard tomorrow and doing well in the run. Ultimately I would just like to finish, I have no time in mind, but I will record my time per km on my phone to see if I improved. Grateful corner Blogs. This week's Pi Weekly newsletter has someone's blog who built a mp3 player into an old lego case, which is exactly what I am trying to do for my son's white noise maker this weekend - except into a mint tin not a lego case. I am grateful people take the time to upload these blogs, because it looks like he has it wired up differently than what I was planning. I'm hoping to read his entry and learn a few things. This weekend to be productive: noisemaker, run, sell xbox, study.

It's like moving from LA to NY! Depends what kind of exercise you're wanting to do @Zeeko! The majority of routines it doesn't matter where you are or what equipment you have access to. If you need some light weights you could use items around the house or buy single entries into those anytime fitness franchises. Exercise is great when you get into the routine, not just for your body but really helps clear your mind, which will help during the detox.

On a long enough timeline, everything is ephemeral.

I was worried as well, especially when they would ask me why they haven't seen me online for weeks. Turns out like @Mettermrck said, they were very supportive, and it gave at least one other one the motivation to give up and go outside as well. For the remainder, I just get on the front foot with suggestions for activities instead because they have a chance to default back to "meet you online".

Did the relapse on soda cause the relapse on fast food? You can do this buddy. Just visualise the amount of weight you were losing every day! Your body needs tons of energy to keep getting put through its paces in the gym, and it's only going to get that from healthy foods!

09 Aug 17 Days to go: 250 So I am in a bit of a bad mental space with work. I am at the point where when I look at my to do list or work through projects, all my mind is saying is "you really need a break". This started getting stronger and stronger right before I lost my cool at work over a couple of issues. They probably are minor issues but I took them personally due to the pride I have in my work. Was I permitted or allowed to get emotional about them? I would say so. Should I have got emotional about them? No, I should have kept it together and taken the professional route. I do have a work trip for the next two days so I might be a bit quiet on here. If it is the case of I don't establish a routine or I don't have enough time to make any posts I will write them down on my trusty (shudder, windows) laptop. I do have an essay due Friday that I haven't started again, I thought I had fixed this problem. Me getting emotional really does derail my progress in so many different areas. Have not put my xbox up on eBay yet as I can't work out what the market price for it is. I ended up just researching similar sales yesterday to try and work out a fair price. Grateful corner My son. I came home in the middle of the day yesterday to get away from the crush of work and spent a few minutes with him just wandering around the house playing with stuff. Really helps not only put things in perspective but to forget about my first world problems for a while. He didn't need to do anything different, just to be himself.

You might be feeling a bit fragile too with looking down the barrel of splitting with your wife. Just be aware of your weaknesses or soft points for the moment and be ready for them! Maybe you are trying to give too many things up at the same time so your body is still adjusting? Just think, if you keep going down this path then you are going to start being nostalgic about life! You haven't finished the game of life yet, and the graphics are way better

All the cool kids live in Sydney mate! I feel your frustration with it being a lot of effort to catch up with people. I have virtually given up on it, but one thing @Cam pointed out to me was that you don't have to catch up with them in person to be social with them. I now try to skype or call someone new every day or when I really feel a bit isolated. Have you also tried audiobooks instead of reading? You might find you can get through content faster and you can still listen even if you're tired. And when you move to Sydney, travelling does not become any easier!

08 Aug 17 Days to go: 251 So my browser crashed and I lost my post. Frustrating. That is the deathknell for using Midori! Lets see if I can remember what I had. I don't think I am a pure minimalist either @Mettermrck, but it definitely is a path I would like to follow. There are too many little luxuries that I enjoy right now that would prevent me from being considered a true believer! But even if I implement just a handful of the concepts then both my mental state of feeling comfortable in my own house again (and when people are over) and financially from both the stuff I sell and the stuff I don't buy, are going to be way better off. I have sold two things on eBay now, have one active listing and hopefully today will be the day that I finally put up my xbox. No more excuses after talking about it for so long! I am @Vlad! I am inspired by the pimoroni speaker hat. It looks like it should just be the case of soldering one wire and some headers, the biggest challenge will be sorting out the software side of it - I haven't done any research into it at all. I am hoping I can finally get one of my half-finished projects out of the way and put to use. I wanted to make a white noise maker for him because at the moment I use an old phone to play white noise for him but he is so fascinated by screens I want to minimise him being around them, and when he sees the phone he grabs it and tries to start playing videos on it already. It should use less power too. So I think my arch nemesis is here - I am getting sick again. The last day I have had zero energy and it has been a real struggle to do anything of importance, which is usually the first sign of I am coming down with something. This sucks, because I knew the biggest challenge I am facing now until the marathon is just staying healthy. I thought I had got ahead of it by drinking a boatload of water and taking lots of vitamins, but it looks like that was a losing battle. I guess it was always going to be a challenge with my son going to child care and having so many people in the house. Fingers crossed I will be able to get over it quickly and get back training, I have the city2surf race this weekend that I will be doing regardless if I have to drag myself over the finish line. I was going to rest for 3 days prior to the race anyway so maybe that will also help. I think I need to shake up my podcast list. I have a couple of podcasts there from before I started the detox which are gaming related. I haven't been downloading any new episodes of them, but they still come up in my new episode feed. Today there was a podcast about the new Lycanroc form, which turned into me googling pokemon again (which was probably reinforced by talking to mates about it a few days ago), which turned into me reading news posts about the new game they announced two months ago that I didn't know about. Felt good at first having a read about them, then I got the thought of "maybe you could dabble in it a little now you're through the detox" and I quickly closed the browser tabs. I knew where that was heading. Evil little shoulder devil man. Maybe my DS needs to go on the chopping block too! I have enjoyed my "mini vacation" from study for a day. Decided not to look at my studies yesterday to reset after the massive amount of pressure I put myself under for the debate. I will get back to it today, even if it is just going through some of the readings. Going to be another busy day so need to stay as productive as possible and prioritise correctly - wasting time looking at gaming sites does not help! Grateful corner Bill "smoothing". I have only discovered this is a thing yesterday, which is a surprise, it makes so much sense. It is where if you get large bills like council rates or water bills every quarter or annually, that you can use companies that will break it up into smaller amounts for you to pay more regularly for a fee. The end result is your expenses are "smoothed" out over the year. I am testing out paying some of my larger irregular bills this way, which should also remove some of that pressure I was feeling before with my panic attack. It is also handy to break down how much I need to earn each week or month to keep on top of my bills! I think far too many of us lose track of how much we should be earning or saving, resulting in spiralling out of control into debt.