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info-gatherer

Enjoying life. 90 Days without gaming.

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Starting this journal goes against some personal, deep privacy concerns. Lately I had been more open with people and friends about my gaming addiction problem and I fear my writings could be located and diffused. Even then, my situation obliges me to take this path again. Around the beginning of april I started playing in moderation. Every now and then I would spend a couple hours playing. I would play mobile or offline games, to distance myself from the more dangerous online gaming world. Then, one day, around the end of april, I played 10 hours straight of League of Legends. At night, I uninstalled and never played it again. But at that point I was already deemed to fail. I started to obsessively lurk the /r/classicwow subreddit. French semester had already finished by that time, so I didn't really have anything to do during my days. No school, no family, for the most part no friends, "just" a girlfriend. I registered on a vanilla wow private server and spent the last 20 days gaming from early morning to late night every day, mostly without eating, sleeping 4-7 hours, with few exceptions, without a second thought. I will get more in deep about what I felt and what I had in my mind during this last long disappeared may. But for now I just want to tell you I'm here again, abstaining for 90 more days. There'll be time for everything else.

Day 1

I woke up at around 10. I realized my girlfriend was gone without saying. We basically lived all the time together this month, since I was gaming non-stop and she was doing some hard studying at my side, same table. Yesterday night I told her I decided to quit again. She was drunk, so she didn't care nor understand too much. It's ok, it's manageable. This morning I woke up, apartment was empty, and I was ready to start fresh. I checked my phone and found some messages, for the first time in 5 days I answered one. It was a friend that said hello. I immediately proposed meeting in person, and I'm waiting for an answer. Then I decided to watch the last episode of House of Cards, finished the serie, then I came here to write this post. Before this relapse I was quite ahead on my duties and general life organisation, so even after a month of nothingness my life is not a complete mess. I trust myself to be able to recover very fast, in less than a week. As @Cam Adair mentioned in my last journal, it's not about quitting games, but about what you do instead. I believe that during my previous attempts I was too focused on improving my academics or stay quit from smoking to really try to be happier and actively improve my social life. This time I hope... my intent is... to strive for a more balanced approach. From a practical standpoint, there's things that need to be done during the day. Ill do checklists. I'm buying post-its today, but maybe I can do it here too. Oh, I forgot to mention. I'm quitting France in 2-3 weeks. Back to Italy. I'll take this time to reconcile with the city and the life I built here, this long-short year...

Checklist of things that I keep pushing forward but I should shall take care of:

- Send a mail to my university supervisor, asking for a meeting. OR Go to the bureau in person.
- Book a seat on a plane to go back home.
- Answer a certain mail.
- Send an application for New York University, or Beijing, China. I haven't decided yet. Deadline is June the 6th.
- Call my family. See how they're doing.
- Write to L. Try to meet her if she's still in town.
- Contact my previous flatmate. There's a lot of mail for her in my mailbox, been there for weeks, I never told her. Maybe meet for a drink, even if we had some arguements.
- Well... study for my next exam, in less than 4 weeks.

I plan to do all of this in the coming days, a little bit at a time.

Today, I mean to:

- Go to the supermarket. Fridge is completely empty.
- Cut my beard. Get a shower. Get back in shape.
- In the same spirit, go running.
- And do some basic cleaning of the apartment.
- Do at least 1 thing from checklist 1.
- Meet M. or at least set a meeting for tomorrow.

 

I'll update this evening. As usual, thanks for the space. I see there's new members, some old members, faces I know... I'm glad to be back. I have trust in my future, in what awaits me, and I hope I understood the necessity of living in the moment, as well. Enjoying life... Something I've always been bad at. Might as well give it a try : )

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Welcome back to the forums!

You may have started playing games again, but at least you managed to stop yourself fairly soon after. I'm starting to realise that life is more about managing the downs, instead of maintaining the ups.

Wishing you all the best, and I look forward to seeing where your journey takes you!

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8 hours ago, James Good said:

Welcome back to the forums!

You may have started playing games again, but at least you managed to stop yourself fairly soon after. I'm starting to realise that life is more about managing the downs, instead of maintaining the ups.

Wishing you all the best, and I look forward to seeing where your journey takes you!

Hi James. You're the new community manager, right? Thanks for the kind reply.

Day 1 (evening)

Did every chore listed. When I went out running it immediately started raining lol so I did some exercise indoors instead. Set up a meeting for tomorrow with M., a friend of mine.

Main checklist update:

8 hours ago, info-gatherer said:

Checklist of things that I keep pushing forward but I should shall take care of:

- Send a mail to my university supervisor, asking for a meeting. OR Go to the bureau in person. (scheduled for tomorrow)
- Book a seat on a plane to go back home.
- Answer a certain mail.
- Send an application for New York University, or Beijing, China. I haven't decided yet. Deadline is June the 6th.
- Call my family. See how they're doing. (mostly done. didn't call everyone but had 3 calls)
- Write to L. Try to meet her if she's still in town.
- Contact my previous flatmate. There's a lot of mail for her in my mailbox, been there for weeks, I never told her. Maybe meet for a drink, even if we had some arguements.
- Well... study for my next exam, in less than 4 weeks.

I look forward living, tomorrow. I'm happy not to be a bit zombied anymore ahah. Recovering is going great as of now! :=)

Ill finish by quoting a small section of the email I wrote: "mainly I'm just trying to live my life more lightly. With less anxiety, less pain, more smiles and lighthearted happiness. I think I'm well enough".

Cya

 

 

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Day 2

I met with M. We had breakfast together. She invited me to a dinner that’s probably going to happen tonight. Then I spent the morning filing my application for New York. Now it’s 3 PM. I wanted to go to the bureau but it’s closed. I’m going to cook a Croque Monsieur and start studying.

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Day 1

My last try didn’t last long. I stayed sober just enough time to study for an exam, then right after (June 24) I relapsed and went back to playing all day.

Now I’m back to living with my parents. Having parental supervision is good and bad at the same time. Good because it effectively limits my playing time. Bad because I feel constantly judged, shamed and attacked, which just makes me want to play more.

My parents made it very clear that as a student my job is to study. I have another exam on July the 30th, and they expect me to take it and pass it. If I started studying right now, maybe I’d be able to make it, but honestly my mind is in such a dire state and my needs are such incompatible with it, that I don’t think it’s a good idea.

Looking at job websites is depressing. It’s like I studied all my life for nothing. My high honors diplome in the best italian university in my field, my international curriculum, the three languages I speak fluently and the other three I can read, all of that could maybe provide me with an unqualified place as a clerk or something.

But I know that I must not stay at home... I must be with people, in the real world... Get out of my house... Improve my social skills... Make friends... Everything else is less of a priority...

On a positive note, I was surprised that this long relapse didn’t impact much my dreams. I’m not dreaming about games, I’m not playing video games while I sleep. Maybe it’s true that the mind takes a lot of time to wire, to re-wire, to wire again...

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@JustTom 🙂

Day 1, still

Why I don’t have the time to do all the things I’d like to do today? Where’s my day gone????

Oh, of course, I just realized I woke up at 1PM.

I just finished reading Respawn. The first time, two years ago, I only read up to chapter 4, which is the one in which you figure out what to do instead of gaming. I couldn’t think of anything at the time! This time I found the answers I need and read up to the last page.

I share here my goals:

WORK: Finish all my exams except one before the end of September.

SOCIAL: Go to the library at least 2 times a week!

There is a new library in my city and apparently everyone I used to know when I was in school is studying there, so it’ll be a chance to improve my social skills and maybe (re)connect with people!

BODY: Exercise & Healthy eating!

I will go back to exercising daily. I’m adding 10 minutes meditation. I’m also looking into the possibility of a padel course and/or gym membership.

LOGISTICS: Plan the day in advance thanks to an agenda or calendar. Keep a gratitude journal. Edit: Set a fixed and healthy sleeping schedule.

 

I’m really happy to be here again doing this! Right now I’m experiencing a burst of energy, because I now have GOALS and objectives I want to achieve 🙂

Quote by Respawn:

 

DCF93CA8-1DB5-4510-8702-DCE175C31457.jpeg

Edited by info-gatherer
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58 minutes ago, info-gatherer said:

@JustTom 🙂

Day 1, still

Why I don’t have the time to do all the things I’d like to do today? Where’s my day gone????

Oh, of course, I just realized I woke up at 1PM.

I just finished reading Respawn. The first time, two years ago, I only read up to chapter 4, which is the one in which you figure out what to do instead of gaming. I couldn’t think of anything at the time! This time I found the answers I need and read up to the last page.

I share here my goals:

WORK: Finish all my exams except one before the end of September.

SOCIAL: Go to the library at least 2 times a week!

There is a new library in my city and apparently everyone I used to know when I was in school is studying there, so it’ll be a chance to improve my social skills and maybe (re)connect with people!

BODY: Exercise & Healthy eating!

I will go back to exercising daily. I’m adding 10 minutes meditation. I’m also looking into the possibility of a padel course and/or gym membership.

LOGISTICS: Plan the day in advance thanks to an agenda or calendar. Keep a gratitude journal. Edit: Set a fixed and healthy sleeping schedule.

 

I’m really happy to be here again doing this! Right now I’m experiencing a burst of energy, because I now have GOALS and objectives I want to achieve 🙂

Quote by Respawn:

 

DCF93CA8-1DB5-4510-8702-DCE175C31457.jpeg

Way to go!!!

I like the meditation goal you have there!!

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Day 1, night

So, I tried to plan the day with Google Calendar, but it’s a weird app that doesn’t let you choose the time for scheduled activities and doesn’t allow you to schedule work/study time (wtf?) so now I’m trying Habitica which has no timestamps and works more like a checklist... Ok, I think I’ve got an agenda somewhere, an old gift, now I’ll find it and put it to good use.

Then instead of playing videogames until early morning, I’ll watch a movie and go to bed.

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I got the first cravings already, but it has to be expected. I didn’t prepare much for this quitting attempt, the only thing I know is that now, once again, choosing whether I want to live a good life or a bad life is a decision which is fully in my hands. I’m in control, I have to be.

I’ve gotta grown up into an adult I guess.

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Weird matches here, lost the first two against players of my level or slightly higher and won the third with 5 seconds left on the clock against a much higher rated player. Three matches left, I need a clear head.

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On 7/17/2019 at 10:48 PM, JustTom said:

How was your gaming period? Was it bad or did you manage to somehow stay functional and keep up with studies etc.?

So... I slowly went back to gaming starting in April, I guess, with some games on mobile, and started playing seriously around the end of may. I’d game the whole day every day, but having litterally nothing to do (because before relapsing I was quite ahead in study/life) I guess I was able to stay “functional”. It’s not about gaming, I guess, my life itself is disfunctional to the point that I can waste a whole month 24/7 and don’t have much or any negative impact.

From an emotional perspective tho, I really felt all the symptoms. Loss of interest in everything else, compulsive thoughts about gaming, numbed emotional response to social stimulation, difficulty to focus on everything else, social anxiety.

Then around the 10th of June I “stopped gaming” and studied all day every day to pass an exam on the 24th. I succeeded but the day after I relapsed (“come on, it’s more than one month before the next exam! I can game now!”) and proceeded to game non-stop until 2 days ago. Result: I’m not passing my exam on the 30th, so I guess, to answer your question, that during my gaming period I was highly disfunctional, except for a very short time (which is in fact the two weeks I wasn’t gaming).

This time I’m quitting and I want to go back to be functional. Not just not gaming,  but building a functional life. And I’m not doing this for me only, but also for my loved ones, to spare them the sense of failure of seeing me as a suicidal zombie. I want to make them proud of me again and spend some quality time together.

Sorry it’s a bit long...

Day 2

This morning I went back to sleeping after waking up and having a shower. It takes some time to get sleep right after two dissolute months, so I don’t want to be hard on myself about it.

I wrote my gratitude journal, which I’m going to do tomorrow too, and I spent the afternoon watching a movie I really enjoyed.

Then in the evening I went to this tournament and talked with a lot of people, old acquaintances and new. I had a good time. Also the background music was very good. I ended up with 3 points out of 6, which makes my performance average, but I did my best and have nothing to regret. I dined at my uncle’s restaurant, which is located in the same town that hosted the event, and at midnight I drove back home.

Again, I don’t want to be hard on myself for not being “productive”. Right now I don’t care: I want to be happy and put some meaning in my life, and I think today I took a small step in that direction.

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I really feel what you said about gaming not having a really negative effect in life in terms of severe consequences. I've taken to calling myself privileged for that reason, but I use it as a way to push myself and make me use that privilege to actually do better than before. Still struggling with laziness though.

Don't let the mainstream rat race mentality overtake you, just because what you spent your day on didn't make you money or got you closer to having a better professional skill it doesn't mean you weren't productive! You were productive in caring for some social needs of yours and in finding yourself. We're human beings and we need a big list of things to feel whole.

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Hey fawn 🙂 Thanks for the comment. Where did our privilege bring us? In my opinion, the answer is clear: empty, unsubstantial lives. Lately I’ve been thinking about the true meaning of the formula “consumerist society”. Before I just thought it meant that we are just spoiled baddies who buy a lot of things we don’t need, thus wasting them, but it actually means that acquiring and consuming “things” (be it objects or, even more so today, entertainment) is the main goal of our lives. Productive work is not seen as a goal in itself, nor it is functional to survival, but it’s seen as a mean of buying and consuming more. What do we thing about, what do we dream? How’s our collective subconscious shaped? Working is a sort of an afterthought of our real self, which only manifests itself in our free time. More status symbols, more web series, more videogames, more “experiences” (fancy food, travel, special education, sport and so on). Or, why not, more spend all day on the sofa and let my parents pay for me. To be fair, since we live in an economic system that provides a virtually unlimited production capability but is unable to match it by an equally unlimited purchasing power (because the wealth gets polarized as a result of the current economic asset, but I’m unwillingly getting technical and/or political, let’s just say that the problem today is not producing, but selling, and thus the success of all the marketing sciences et cetera) we may say that a life dedicated to consummation is not some sort of moral vice (what you call lazyness) but, on the contrary, it’s what the current economic system asks of us to reproduce itself. In our times, it’s a virtue. This is why sporting a brand new iphone like the one I’m typing on atm or saying that I traveled as a tourist in many different countries, even if I didn’t work a single minute to earn all of that, increases my value in the eyes of the western society. I’m not being disfunctional, on the contrary, I’m being highly functional to the truest exigences of the contemporary world. Of course this leads to a shitty, empty, unfulfilled life (at least in my case: I know a lot of people that seem to be fine with that). I’ll stop this free running stream of consciousness that doesn’t really answer your comment anymore (if it ever did) and get to the journal of the day.

Day 3

I’ll be short. Woke up late. Fine with it. Dedicated the whole afternoon to reading the Exodus book (from the Bible). I’ll maybe read more bible in the coming days (but I peeped at the next books and they don’t look very promising, and Exodus was far worse than Genesis already). 7 PM went running.

My mother entered my room and asked me why I don’t go and meet some friends. Instead of saying I have no friends I said I don’t feel like it and while she was leaving I heard her murmuring “I don’t understand you, without friends I couldn’t live” so I screamed her to go and fuck herself which was not very caring and after we both apologised.

I “had to” work at my electronic cigarettes maintenance in the evening, god, this is boring as hell, I should quit vaping as I quit smoking.

Probably calling my gf before going to bed.

Tomorrow I’ll go to the seaside with my family 🙂

Edited by info-gatherer
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Oh, also, my application to New York University was rejected but I got accepted for spring term 2020 to Oklahoma University, where I will hopefully be able to apply for a position as Italian teacher assistant. There’s an english test I need to take to go to the USA, so I better study a bit and take it on the 3rd of August (first available date). I think I mainly need to improve in 2 areas: listening, specifically songs (I never seem to be able to understand the lyrics) and grammar, which I mostly forgot after high school. I don’t feel like studyinnnnnnng. But I guess it’s not going to be difficult if I just put in a little effort.

Edited by info-gatherer
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Day 4

Went to the seaside, after that I went playing padel and then at a pizzeria with my family. Spent the whole day with them. Did my gratitude and meditation. Not much to say, but this doesn’t mean it wasn’t a good day.

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Day 5

I didn’t want to spend another full day with my parents so I stayed at home and I’ve been fighting all day with the urge to game. I watched a movie, didn’t even have lunch. I know for a fact that gaming is a huge problem in my life, so if I get this tempted despite the evidence of huge adverse effects it means I really don’t value my life much. I’ve been actively thinking how to get that social stimulation I need today and didn’t come up with anything. FUCK

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Day 5, still

I didn't game, but I feel awful. Haven't felt this down in a while. I asked my mother if I can get therapy. I did already have 2 different psychologists in the past, and I still don't know if they ever helped me or not. Therapy never had a big effect on me, I guess? But I want to try again... May work this time... My mum suggested I go to collective therapy (like many people in a room all together I suppose?) which is the cheaper version. Actually I like the idea, even if it scares me a bit (am I supposed to talk about what I feel in front of everyone?). Tomorrow she's going to do the phone call for me. I hope we get at it soon, possibly tomorrow itself.

Without my girlfriend's support today I'd maybe have gamed. I owe her a lot. She's really wonderful and I'm lucky to have her back me up. And I'm grateful to my family too for taking all the shit from me, burdening themselves with a part of my problems, helping me out. Some days you don't really see the light at the end of the tunnel, and you wonder, does the tunnel even have an end? isn't it the name we give to our life? Then comes the next day. I'm really looking forward to the next day.

Edited by info-gatherer
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I've been thinking about this for a while. I've always had a strong prejudice against motivational books, for different reasons that I won't uncover here for brevity. But I've been thinking... Maybe I should give them a try. Lately I am striving for guidance, and I now feel it'd be interesting to try and read one of these books. I googled "best motivational books" and I immediately picked one: "How to win friends and influence people". The title itself would have me puke one year ago. Win friends? Influence people? Are we talking about manipulation? I don't care, I'll read it and judge for myself, and I really hope to learn something useful.

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On 7/19/2019 at 12:28 AM, info-gatherer said:

So... I slowly went back to gaming starting in April, I guess, with some games on mobile, and started playing seriously around the end of may. I’d game the whole day every day, but having litterally nothing to do (because before relapsing I was quite ahead in study/life) I guess I was able to stay “functional”. It’s not about gaming, I guess, my life itself is disfunctional to the point that I can waste a whole month 24/7 and don’t have much or any negative impact.

From an emotional perspective tho, I really felt all the symptoms. Loss of interest in everything else, compulsive thoughts about gaming, numbed emotional response to social stimulation, difficulty to focus on everything else, social anxiety.

Then around the 10th of June I “stopped gaming” and studied all day every day to pass an exam on the 24th. I succeeded but the day after I relapsed (“come on, it’s more than one month before the next exam! I can game now!”) and proceeded to game non-stop until 2 days ago. Result: I’m not passing my exam on the 30th, so I guess, to answer your question, that during my gaming period I was highly disfunctional, except for a very short time (which is in fact the two weeks I wasn’t gaming).

This time I’m quitting and I want to go back to be functional. Not just not gaming,  but building a functional life. And I’m not doing this for me only, but also for my loved ones, to spare them the sense of failure of seeing me as a suicidal zombie. I want to make them proud of me again and spend some quality time together.

Alright, yeah I had the same way of "functioning" during my bachelors. Gaming all the time and then when deadlines arrived, I pushed 24/7 including help from friends/classmates to pass, then game again because the exam/deadline is over. Then in my masters, it got better at first because of the immense motivation of starting the programme as well as meeting and connecting with new people, having a different environment and such, but then it got worse. It really escalated in 2019 when I had 2 months off and then started my thesis - didn't go to the uni to hang out with friends anymore and became a bit more lonely -> my brain went insane on games. Eventually, my supervisors told me that the thesis project can't be completed because of my mental health problems resulting in low productivity -> I was getting fired. And if I was, it would have probably been the end of this degree. This was my rock bottom. 

This "existential" threat made me snap out of my stupor and think with a tiny bit of clarity. I concluded that everything I tried before, as much as it helps, is not nearly enough for me to recover from this addiction. I concluded that I can only pull off the "one last chance" card if I make huge changes to my lifestyle that would guarantee success, otherwise, I would not ask for it and just let them fire me. None of those "tricks" were going to work anymore. No leaving the laptop at the office, no affirmations, no betting money on getting out of the house by a certain time, no nootropics, no website/app blockers/productivity hacks, no cold showers, no amount of personal development trickery was going to pull me out of this, I've tried. I even thought of one more trick I haven't tried before: throwing away the router and the ethernet cable from my apartment. But I already knew how it would have gone: it'd work for a few days, then I'd start to feel good about myself, feel like I'm recovering and I don't need it anymore, and I'd stop by a shop to buy a new router.

Not saying you're the same, this is just my experience. I realized that even though I considered myself an addict, I didn't actually apply strategies for addicts. I applied strategies for people with problematic use. I was treating this whole thing as a problem of discipline, motivation and willpower. This whole "addiction is a disease" spiel is not just wordplay. It means that my brain is physically dysfunctional. My brain's chemicals and structure are incorrect and it's making me behave in this self-destructive way. Therefore, I cannot trust my brain. It will keep finding ways to convince or force my conscious to game and be miserable. I cannot fix this by myself, because in order to do that, I need to use my brain, which is corrupt. Therefore I need a system that will be preventing me from gaming and shifting my state to the desired one constantly. When my brain tries to trick me into relapsing, there is something that pulls me onto to right track without me requiring me to do barely anything. 

I looked at the core principles of what can make me better and the answer was clear: HOURLY sense of connection with people. I needed someone to live with me. Not as a caretaker, but as a person and a friend. I would never want to show my darkest side to someone else, so just passive presence of another person at all times is enough for me to never relapse. So I invited one of my good friends to live as a roommate, for free. It's a sacrifice in comfort and efficiency, but a miniscule one compared to recovery. Even when I'm home alone, the expectation that my roommate will return eventually and would find me gaming if I relapse, is enough to make me not even consider gaming. The plan was that if I couldn't find anyone who would live with me, I would quit the university and go back home to live with a friend from my hometown. There was just no way I could keep doing the same thing and not fail. If I had a discipline problem, I could motivate myself and use all these schedules and tricks to get better at time management. But this is not a discipline problem, this is an addiction. So on top of getting a roommate, I found CGAA - Computer Gaming Addicts Anonymous. This gave me a sense of identity and most importantly a sense of community. They have online meetings every single day, at two times. On these meetings people essentially take turns to "share" their experience, what they're feeling, what they think or anything related to the addiction. The purpose is not to preach or even give advice at all, the purpose is only to speak out your mind. It's practically free daily group therapy. A part of the "AA"-style recovery is also a sponsor, who is a peer that successfuly recovered and now voluntarily helps other people recover. I have daily checks on how I'm doing, and if I don't check-in on any given day, my sponsor calls me. This is to prevent the major isolation behavior that happens every time I relapse. All of this combined is the system of human connection and structure that (I think) is the deal-breaker and I will recover from this addiction, this time for real. Forever.

In my internship/master thesis project - I knew I still had the "just one last chance" card and after it was decided my friend would be moving in, I asked for it with a condition that I have to come every single day(when I was in relapse, I straight up didn't show up) and I've been progressing in my project ever since - day 45 today.

I apologize for the huge rant, and also for possible inconsistencies since I wrote it in 2 phases. Consider figuring out how to stop this cycle once and for all, and do everything it takes to execute it, barring in mind that the brain of an addict cannot be trusted. There needs to be something pulling the addict, not the addict trying to "push" with willpower. Consider checking out one of the CGAA meetings every day at 13:30pst(19:30 CEST). This forum is nice and all, but it doesn't even come close to a real-time daily meetings with real voices(sadly not faces, f2f meetings are usually just in MURIKA).

 

5 hours ago, info-gatherer said:

I've been thinking about this for a while. I've always had a strong prejudice against motivational books, for different reasons that I won't uncover here for brevity. But I've been thinking... Maybe I should give them a try. Lately I am striving for guidance, and I now feel it'd be interesting to try and read one of these books. I googled "best motivational books" and I immediately picked one: "How to win friends and influence people". The title itself would have me puke one year ago. Win friends? Influence people? Are we talking about manipulation? I don't care, I'll read it and judge for myself, and I really hope to learn something useful.

That book is really good, although you can just feel from the words that it's decades old. For a modern approach, I recommend 6 Pillars of Self-Esteem or Atomic Habits. Both are absolutely crazy-packed with value.

Edited by JustTom
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9 hours ago, info-gatherer said:

"How to win friends and influence people".

I have read this book. In my personal opinion it isn't the first book you should pick up right now, but very useful either way. I second what @JustTom said, as might be obvious from my signature xD The win friends book is about a more efficient way of communicating to avoid unnecessary conflict and do well with lots of different acquaintances diplomatically.

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Day 6

I drove two times and back to the fucking doctor and got rejected two times because the opening hours on the fucking website doesn’t match the fucking opening hours sticked with tape on the fucking door. I’m so angry at myself, for being this fucking inexperienced about life. What to do with this anger?

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