Again and again until it works

[DaMudaPacker]

I'm not sure how many times I've quit gaming, but this time, I'm completely serious. I've been off gaming for the past 3 days almost completely - I just have two more days of routine fights I have to do because I want to show respect for my guildmates and not abandon them for the weekly tally.

I have to say, I haven't been this happy for a long time. For the past year I've scheduled my life around gaming. Come home - gaming, before going to sleep - gaming, waking up - mobile game. I've spent the past two years basically wasted and I have to say I regret it. To be honest, I could have stayed in violin lessons and be able to play my favourite songs or have worked out more for my declining health. I could have done amazingly in school and learned so much more. Wasted potential I suppose. But life is full of mistakes and I can't sulk any longer.

So let's talk business.

Goals:

• Stop gaming completely - even casually
• Workout regularly, 4-5 times a week (Modified 5 x 5 with cardio)
• Eat healthier, more fiber and micro nutrients, less processed meats and meat in general (mostly red)
• Get into a good university
• Read those books I've bought
• Find a new productive hobby (I'm thinking writing or something art related because it's so relaxing)
• Go out more with friends
• Appreciate life and everyone I have - because Lord knows I haven't been doing that
• No wanking, that's degeneracy

Plans:

• Keep an updated personal journal
• Schedule my weeks
• Meditate every night
• Smile more

Hopefully those basic plans will be enough, I'll change/update them if needed, but so far they work.

Oh turns out there's guidelines, I was just too exited. I'll figure out a better format in the morning after the gym

Edited November 19, 2016 by DaMudaPacker

[Reno F]

Welcome back, DaMudaPacker!

[DaMudaPacker]

Thanks Reno!

Alright, well it's only 3pm right now, but I'm already slacking. Woke up at around 10am and went out for a McDonald's breakfast, roughly 600 calories and then went to the gym. Came home and I broke my no wanking goal already. Back the timer! Day 0 once again. I'm tired as hell right now and having major regret. Trying to decide whether or not I should go out tonight with some old friends or if I should stay at home and do homework. I think i'm leaning towards going out because staying in doors is really making my feel down today. Still in limbo mode where I'm sad because I'm not running away from my problems, but also excited at the same time. 

If there's something I'm happy about, I suppose it's that I haven't wasted my entire day so far like I used to in the past. I'm a lot more productive and efficient, but there's still a lot of improvements left to go. I tend to waste a lot of time during leeway between two tasks. Like when I wake up, I'll do nothing for 30 minutes just watching my phone and then get my day started. Gonna fix this bad habit in the days to come.

TL;DR and for future easy reference:

Goals for the rest of the day:

• Clean Room
• Start my English essay
• Go out (maybe, if not then more work

Fails for the day:

• Wanked
• Not as productive as I had planned due to slacking around and poor habits 

Overall mood as of 3pm:

Feelsbadman

Edited November 19, 2016 by DaMudaPacker

[Simon E]

Fall seven times, stand up eight. This time you'll be sucessful! 

I tried to quit gaming for more than 1.5 years, and towards the end I honestly didn't think I would be able to.

But I tried one last time, and the rest is history  If I could do it, you can too. It's good that you have goals and plans, keep working on them!

[Cam Adair]

Great to have you back with us!

[Tatu92]

I was in the same situation man. Welcome back

[PhilLabranche]

This time's the charm!

[DaMudaPacker]

Thank you guys for all the kind words and support - it's great to be back and hopefully stay a lot longer than before.

I ended up going out and it will well worth my time. We set up the chapel with Christmas decor because it's a church haha and honestly Christmas trees are always charming to look at regardless of month it is IMO. Talked to one of my close friends about what I'm thinking about and just caught up, and I have to say, I really needed it. There's a lot of problems that really influenced why I play video games so much from work piling up and honestly just my school environment. Don't worry, I'm not being bullied or anything, but there's a lot of negative people to say the least. I have to keep happy and not worry about them so much. My friend told me to just focus on what's important and what I can fix, not worry about the big things until I can really do something about them. Do little things and such.

I didn't end up doing the work I wanted to today, but tomorrow I'm going to hit everything fast and early. English essay is due Monday, so I really don't have a choice  

I did end up learning three Chinese words today. I'm doing three words a day and hopefully be able to write and read by summer - I can already speak fluently. 

[AlexTheGrape]

Hi there, great story you've got!

I've failed trying to quit gaming several times, but it was completely possible in the end. I'm sure you'll be able to do the same, so best of luck on your journey to improving your life!

You've got the right attitude to pick up from where you've left off in your life, if you keep that up you'll go far

[Schwing]

I do not think wanking is degeneracy. But that's just my opinion. I like to use it as a reward rather than something to fall back on when I'm depressed. I made a little game where I have to start a conversation with a girl if I want to jerk it the same day. Also try and figure out what makes you want to jerk it. I found it was just when I was bored.

[Schwing]

By the way. Failure is irrelevant. If failing again and again is what it takes to succeed then let it be so.

[Mad Pharmacist]

Hmm... You wanna meditate, so it looks like you're a buddhist or which other Eastern religion/philosophy?

Greetings, Mad Pharmacist

[DaMudaPacker]

Thanks again guys for all the interest, kind words and discussion.

No, I'm not religious in any way  . My mother is Christian and used to bring me to Church, but I don't go regularly anymore - just to hang out with friends. And on the subject of wanking, I've decided to stop because I'm always super tired afterwards and it prevents me from being productive and thus it is degeneracy to me personally. If you can game, or drink, or wank without seeing consequences and it's just a hobby or occasional thing, then it's all fine. But when you have daily urges that you can't control like I do for both gaming and porn, then it has become an issue. Perhaps through ending porn and gaming, I can start to focus better because I lose focus a lot when talking to friends - I'll just daze off or when I do work, I'll just wonder off to somewhere else. Obviously gaming and porn aren't the only causes, but I do believe they've played an influence whether directly or indirectly.

So the plan for the day. I woke up at 10am because I was out with my friends talking about our lives until about 12:30am, so I decided to let myself naturally wake up - proper rest is my biggest goal right now because without proper rest, I lack focus and mental processing abilities a lot. I guesstimate it may take a couple of days of good sleep for me to feel 100% again - I haven't for a long time. I'm not sure if I'm going to the gym today because I've gone for 3 days in a row and I could take a rest, but I also don't want to stay in doors all day either so I'm rather conflicted. 

Still very down in the dumps, but it's getting better! Have to learn the Chinese words again, and of course my English essay. Thankfully, I'm a decent writer  Hope you lot have a great day la!

[Mad Pharmacist]

I'm glad that you agree about degenerace of masturbation and pornography.

That's how it works man! I mean, if you want to became real man, obviously.

Greetings, Mad Pharmacist

[DaMudaPacker]

I'm glad that you agree about degenerace of masturbation and pornography.

That's how it works man! I mean, if you want to became real man, obviously.

Greetings, Mad Pharmacist

Yes my friend. Plus it invades my private thoughts out in public at times and that's just not okay or normal for me. 

[DaMudaPacker]

Man I don't even know where to start...

Today I was scammed of roughly $350 USD after I tried to sell my account. Never use PayPal if you are a small time seller, take it from me. They are terrible at protecting small sellers. I'm not sure what else to say, I'm pretty sad right now, I was gonna buy my friends some gifts, but I guess not anymore. Part of me is telling myself to not be sad, and it's only $350, I'll have more money later, but it's hard not to feel a bit sad.

Have been going to the gym, need to do more work, I'll write more tomorrow, really not in the mood. Sorry guys.

[Cam Adair]

That's too bad and being scammed never feels good, but it's just money. Sounds like whoever scammed you really needed it.

Keep your head up.

[DaMudaPacker]

Oh well, I'm over the scam. Still hope Paypal can get the money back, but time will tell. 

Gonna sleep today at 9Pm and wake up at 5am to hit the gym so I can focus on school all day.

Gonna schedule my day for tomorrow because not much has really happened for the past two days. But I do have to eat healthier and count my calories, been eating a bit much lately and that doesn't help with weight loss. SO, for the next 90 days, no junk food at all, no fried, no high fat and high caloric density crap.

So schedule!

5am - 8am : Wake up, gym and prep for school

9am - 3pm: School

4pm to 7pm: Homework

7pm to 8pm: Dinner and rest

8pm to 9pm: Personal goals like learning Chinese, reading and overall relaxation.

 

[Tatu92]

sucks about the scam. i've almost been scammed on kijiji but thought the better of it. I was about to send my laptop to africa without getting paid hahaha. luckily it was a holiday and the post-office was closed. the next day I spoke with a close friend who advised me otherwise, and then checked with paypal to confirm the legitimacy of the trade - which was obviously not legit. 

[Mad Pharmacist]

Man I don't even know where to start...

Today I was scammed of roughly $350 USD after I tried to sell my account. Never use PayPal if you are a small time seller, take it from me. They are terrible at protecting small sellers. I'm not sure what else to say, I'm pretty sad right now, I was gonna buy my friends some gifts, but I guess not anymore. Part of me is telling myself to not be sad, and it's only $350, I'll have more money later, but it's hard not to feel a bit sad.

Have been going to the gym, need to do more work, I'll write more tomorrow, really not in the mood. Sorry guys.

Thanks for warning!

Btw. Is it A LOT money in Canada?

Because for comparison in Poland I can survive with good standard with about a MONTH with 350$.

Greetings, Mad Pharmacist

[DaMudaPacker]

Man I don't even know where to start...

Today I was scammed of roughly $350 USD after I tried to sell my account. Never use PayPal if you are a small time seller, take it from me. They are terrible at protecting small sellers. I'm not sure what else to say, I'm pretty sad right now, I was gonna buy my friends some gifts, but I guess not anymore. Part of me is telling myself to not be sad, and it's only $350, I'll have more money later, but it's hard not to feel a bit sad.

Have been going to the gym, need to do more work, I'll write more tomorrow, really not in the mood. Sorry guys.

Thanks for warning!

Btw. Is it A LOT money in Canada?

Because for comparison in Poland I can survive with good standard with about a MONTH with 350$.

Greetings, Mad Pharmacist

Well I mean it's not the most amount of money in the world, but it's not a small amount either, you can get some nice stuff for $350. That's enough groceries for one guy for maybe two months or so.

Onto the journal!

I managed to get a lot of work done today at school and my teacher told me the work was amazing. I attend a university like school where we have seminars, but most times you can work on whatever subject you want. Sounds great, and it is, but most of us just end up goofing off. If I wasn't behind in school I could just rest for the day, but I am behind so I'll have to do more work right now

Didn't end up going to the gym at 5am because I think I damaged my lower back doing deadlifts, maybe it's something with my form, but I'm taking today and maybe tomorrow to let it heal before I do anything that gets me injured. I've decided to not wake up at 5am because I've found it's not very time efficient and also I'm never awake during the day if I go for 5am. I'm far more adjusted to 6 to 7am and I can actually be well rested. If I were to wake up at 5am, I'd have to be sleeping by 830 or 9 and that's just not possible if I want to keep a social life too. 

Overall my mood has been better, but I'm still happy enough. Haven't felt enough satisfaction in my progress. Fighting!

[Jeremias]

Take care of your back! It's one of the most common injuries and it can grow worse over time. As good as it feels to lift heavy, I would recommend stepping down the weight until you're confident that you are feeling your core and glutes engaged, then slowly ramp it up from there. I'm an evening gym-goer myself, I find it keeps my sleeping schedule more consistent. 

Keep fighting  

[Cam Adair]

+1 take care of your back.

[Mad Pharmacist]

Hey, do you seriously need to do deadlifts to be fit? I mean, this exercise is one of the most dangerous on the gym, so you have the highest probability of being injured during training if you do it wrong way.

Greetings, Mad Pharmacist

[DaMudaPacker]

Thanks for the back support guys! Get it? Back support?

I don't have to do deadlifts, but I enjoy them a lot. Big lifts = big smiles. I'll be perfectly safe as long as I don't do anything stupid, which I rarely do in the gym aside from the rare mess up. 

So, it's been about a week since I've stopped playing video games and while I do feel great, I haven't gotten everything in order. It's time to plan out my next week and get everything into ship shape!

Plans:

• Finish one assignment a day (this way I can graduate early and get a job or something)
• Sleep at no later than 11pm each day 
• Go to the gym 4-5x a week, already doing this basically
• Eat 2400 calories a day (have to focus on this)
• Continue to learn Chinese (haven't been doing this for the past two days)
• Do something creative doing spare time, probably reading books

Going to finish an assignment for tomorrow and then hit the sheets. Gonna go to the gym tomorrow after school and maybe go out with friends if they're up for it, if not I just want to relax to some Netflix