Hey Everyone!

[Ashley K.]

My name is Ashley

I'm 27 years old and have been playing video games since I was 5.

I'm also a mother of a 5 year old boy and another on the way so lately I've been playing. It's hard to stop when my husband also plays video games (we mostly play League of Legends).

Someday I would hope to become a graphic designer but I know that if I keep playing I won't make it. Along with the fact that since I have children, I need to put them first.

Hopefully I can find a way to stop, but I don't know where to start.

[Guest]

Welcome Ashley! You will find a group of people here who fully support you in your time here. Does your husband want to quit as well? 

[Ashley K.]

No, he likes to play and he says its easy for him to stop playing

[Cam Adair]

Welcome Ashley! Good to see you again

[Ashley K.]

Thanks! 

[Streuselsturm]

Good to have you here ashley. My wife also plays candy crush sometimes and I noticed how seeing her playing  is one of my triggers. A relationship partner can be you worst enemy but also your greatest ally when it comes to addictions. 

I wish you good luck

[WorkInProgress]

Hi there, I  know how hard it can be to stop games like LoL (because it was my bane for a long time). I have the luck to have a not playing wife. It is awesome that you want to take this step to have a more fulfilled family life and I am excited to see your life change in a good way!

I think a good starting point is to write down the reasons why you want to stop gaming. This can be a journal entry here or a personal diary it doesn't matter. The main thing is that you take your time and really think about the things you like and dislike about gaming. What needs does it fulfil for you? Why do you think it is harming you and in what way does it harm you? Now think of better activities you could use to fulfil this needs. Feel free to ask for advice on this point we all try to find activities which are fun and benefit us instead of draining us like gaming is. If you are clear of your reasons, talk with your husband about them and ask him for support. Maybe he is willing to stop gaming for a period(a month or so) to support you. Or he is willing not to game if you are there(maybe he could play while you are on the playground with your kid or smth. similar). It is important to make him understand why gaming is bad for you and that you don't judge him if he decides to keep gaming for himself(btw. don't judge him). Even if he is addicted,the best way to help him, is to show him that there is another way of living. Then commit to the detox and delete all gaming related content form your pc and delete your account so you can't go back and let go of your achievements in that game (I gave my account to a brother of a friend and he changed my password). If you have a shared account on your pc make a knew account for yourself and let your husband switch the password of the old shared account. Loading up a daily journal here, can help a lot with accountability and if your husband is knowing and supporting what your doing this gets way easier. Also it helps to write down your feelings, because the reasons to game are often to deal with stress or to evade bad feelings. It is a habit you can break if you are aware of the triggers. If you want to read a good book to understand this habit more, I would advice you to read the book " The power of habit".  The other book which helped me the most at this change in my life was "The slight edge".

Sorry for the long answer but I hope some of my advice helps you. We are all cheering for you!

Edited August 28, 2016 by WorkInProgress

[Ashley K.]

Sorry for such a late reply. It's really helpful to read this and to try and stay motivated. Thank you. 

[Mad Pharmacist]

Welcome to the community!

 

[Ashley K.]

Thank you! 

 

[Rick Boon]

Good to see you here Ashley K.!

How is it going? i can really endorse WorkInProgress's advice! did you use some of his tips?