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Awesome man! Great to hear your story end thanks for engagement into my own journal!

Keep posting even one sentence a day. This way you'll keep being consist.

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Congrats on your progress!  My first 3 weeks were my hardest of my 90 day detox and weirdly the last week of it.  I do find many gaming things boring now and information about them tedious.  It is rather hard to even sit still that long anymore even when I need to for studying.  What things have you added to your life to keep busy and to enjoy doing?

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Thanks for all your supports ! That's really something !

In fact there not much new things I have been adding, but rather not be scared of doing things, and them doing them.

It's mainly my music, my job with rehearsals with wonderful people and concerts (was one yesterday night). So this I can not avoid going to one, whatever reason, as no one can replace me during rehearsals & concerts. But I can always delay or reduce to next to nothing my alone-work to prepare. That's why it has been so easy to jump to video games whenever I was tired. And I really did a lot (gaming)

It's also not freaking out organizing things. Again, I can spend my life waiting that somethings happen, and that's really what I have suddenly been doing these last 3-4 years when I started hard-core gaming. Now I try to stay with other musicians I respect (and discover that they are also happy to do things with me) and refuse music / contexts which are hurting my sensitivity. As it's all very subjective, it's easy to break in-depth genuine rules which you can not really describe with words. Feeling that ok maybe it's a small compromise, and anyway I have nothing else at the moment... And so, it's easy to be desapointed , and so to shift to gaming. Now I recently had good discussions with people I secretly wanted to work with for years, and we started designing short and mid terms projects and actions plans (i can be super efficient doing that when I want, even though all these organisational things are boring to me, would rather delegate but... never found someone). That's also this last point : having to do too much of organisational stuff sometimes killed me. It's not the effort to do it, but the fact that my concentration suffered during rehearsals and concerts, and my role is that I should make no compromise with my concentration. So when I sometimes felt overwhelmed, I could also easily shit to gaming.

And I also go out more often with my friends. As I wrote before, only my best friend and my girlfriend know I have been gaming. The other ones just thought I was busy.

I go running, but I was already doing that.

So it's not much completely new things, but rather "do more often", or do again things that had vanished from my life, and doing them in a more peaceful mood.

That's where this meditation helps me a lot. Am not yet practicing meditation daily, but nearly. And yes that's something new to me. I even bought the full app.

And am now going to do some ;-)

 

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You know, now everyone must know that you had been struggling with games before. Who cares?

And nice to see you invested money into something you want to be engaged into more! That's how it works to be more consistent. I have the same with writing 750 words - Paying 5$ per month, which is a lot in my value, is motivating as hell.

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Where can I listen to some of your music?

Concerts only (classical)! But I don't want to mix my former games life that I am ashame with my job... 

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3 weeks clean now !

Had big cravings last friday, started to go to gaming forums, and was then saved by friends calling to go for a beer. Had no time to be alone in front of my computer. Some more risky hours and then I will not be alone for some weeks and anyway far from my gaming computer for most of the summer.

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When you will have cravings next time, you should call your friend to go for a beer, "bouncing ball back" can be helpfull and get you more into organiser personality.

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Thanks WIP and Piotr !

Cravings were quite easy to identity this time:

1- Stress on some administrative stuff that I though had no solution as it has been in the past. Finally found a solution with few emails and phone calls.

2- Felt I deserved it as I did a good concert and was completely dead and I anyway had to have a break.

I think most of my cravings very well fit to the 4 categories Cam mentioned. But Stress is number 1.

Piotr, your last port in your journal made me want to write a bit more about the lost time. As it was not really directly relevant for your journal, I erased it from your journal and I put it here. I NEED to write these things and not letting them as unfinished thoughts. So sorry if you (anyone reading this) find that boring... understand that I need to write it and just skip it !

Reacting to "I've looked back at my life and realised, that the worst kind of pain I've known, is lost time."

I had another life with a non artsy job for more many years, and I was sad that it took me so long to have the courage to do what I always wanted to do, and anger because the main gates were now close because of my age.

All people around me told me that they were thinking it's cool to have made the shift, but it did not help me feel better, I was raging more and more. It could actually have been one of the reason why I sunk into hard core gaming 3-4 years ago when I wanted to be sure I would fail (which hopefully did not arrive :-) ). I never accepted to think that they could be anything positive in these lost years. But in fact I found out some things I learned during this past life are super useful (not only super-mainstream-boring) and sometimes saved my ass when organisation concerts/rehearsal. So in these moments I am glad that I got at least these capabilities, because I see so many of my fellow struggling. I know it's very difficult to imagine anything good coming from these years of gaming, but it's maybe the ultim act of auto-destruction that triggered the act of deciding to change something deep in us. At least, it was for me.

-----

When you will have cravings next time, you should call your friend to go for a beer, "bouncing ball back" can be helpfull and get you more into organiser personality.

Piotr, I don't want to finish alcoholic ;-) But you are very right. I was completely unable to do that during my gaming years, not even answering phone. Am getting back on tracks ! Partying is not to be under-considered.

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I will soon live for some weeks of vacations (far from computers !) I will probably not write much in July as I would like to keep my phone shut as often as possible. But no relaps possible. Let's see how the cravings will harass me...

Wish you all a peaceful month ! Will read you when coming back !

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I will soon live for some weeks of vacations (far from computers !) I will probably not write much in July as I would like to keep my phone shut as often as possible. But no relaps possible. Let's see how the cravings will harass me...

Wish you all a peaceful month ! Will read you when coming back !

Excited for your return. Have a great month!

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Firstly, I am very happy to hear that my words are getting to someone. To be honest, the only thing that games brought to me is English language, even though it's very useful to know this language and I like it more than my native, this still isn't rewarding like 9 years of every day gaming.

Secondly, about that beer, I don't advise to be alcoholic, god no. I meant to try be an organiser, this gets your time, keeps you away from games and makes you more social.

Lastly, have a nice month! Can't wait to hear from you!

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Being of-the-beaten track always helped me to lower my stress level, so let it help you aswell!

And congrats on your streak!

Greetings, Mad Pharmacist

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Firstly, I am very happy to hear that my words are getting to someone. To be honest, the only thing that games brought to me is English language, even though it's very useful to know this language and I like it more than my native, this still isn't rewarding like 9 years of every day gaming.

Secondly, about that beer, I don't advise to be alcoholic, god no. I meant to try be an organiser, this gets your time, keeps you away from games and makes you more social.

Lastly, have a nice month! Can't wait to hear from you!

Really appreciate you being a part of our community!

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Firstly, I am very happy to hear that my words are getting to someone. To be honest, the only thing that games brought to me is English language, even though it's very useful to know this language and I like it more than my native, this still isn't rewarding like 9 years of every day gaming.

Secondly, about that beer, I don't advise to be alcoholic, god no. I meant to try be an organiser, this gets your time, keeps you away from games and makes you more social.

Lastly, have a nice month! Can't wait to hear from you!

Really appreciate you being a part of our community!

Likewise, really appreciate all of you creating this community!

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Back from no-computers-lands !

I see there are many new members, happy to see more quitters !

These weeks without computers have been great, hiked a lot in mountains, read many good books (1 Murakami and 1 R.Gary), swam a lot, my relation everyday more great with my girlfriend. Right now every thing seem to be great, I have for onces exciting plans for the next months.

BUT there are still some stressful situations I hate and never successfully manage to convert into stable situations because they do not depend on me. And then game craving rises.

I am even planning to relapse. Just for few hours, although I know this will lead to hard core gaming. I have been on gaming forums today. I am scared.

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Dude, life without stress happens only when you die.

So just accept the fact that you can feel stress. It's great feeling such as pain, meaning you're alive! :)

Greetings, Mad Pharmacist

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