Wildermyth 108 Posted September 16, 2022 Author Share Posted September 16, 2022 (edited) This evening I started thinking about all the times I've called in sick to school or work just to stay at home and play video games. I became so efficiant at it over the years that I almost scheduled it at one point. Whenever there was a really big game release I almost counted on calling in sick to prolong the weekends. And there were times where my abscense was met with suspicion and loads of questions but I never backed down and changed the behaviour. Getting back in front of the tv and know that I could forget everything else for a day was like covering yourself in a warm blanket after a long day out in the winter cold. This mentality really messed with my loyalty and general motivation. I had so many issues with getting up in the morning and starting that whole tiresome routine up while barely having opened my eyes. I was so exhausted and unfocused that I got depressed on several occasions, having to go to therapy to bring my spirit up. Going to work felt very much like going to prison to me and I just wanted to scream out loud how much it hurt me to be there. Of course I didn't and I never got to the root of my causes. My therapist back then never even questioned my gaming habits because to me they were not the problem - they were the solution. I saw gaming as the salvation in an otherwise boring and meaningless life. They held me together like artificial breathing and I enjoyed every second of it. It's almost scary to think about now how little I had to live for at that point. Or rather: it's scary to realize that gaming made me feel like there was nothing else to live for at that time. Sure, I had lots of issues related to my health and I had a hard time finding new friends after college, but I could've dealt with those issues so much better if it weren't for video games. I had some dreams even back then but I never even concidered them to become reality because of me being caught between games and life. Today I'm in a much healthier position. I have a good physique, a job that I like, plenty of friends and family to care about and most of all: a future. I have so many things I want to do now and I truly believe that they are all possible. Having left games behind there is suddenly so much time and energy to make use of and I couldn't be happier going forward. Edited September 16, 2022 by Wildermyth 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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