Pochatok

Day 140! Nice, finally reached this point 🙂 From here, I will switch to weeks rather than days. I will continue this tracker since I still have the urges to play games. Hope to journal more in the coming weeks, as summer is the time I am most likely to relapse during. *but must say, I am feeling confident this time hehe The last few weeks have been both good and bad; I have been productive, and am pretty much not checking social media at all. However, my mental health has been all over the place, especially last week, when I got so frustrated with art that I nearly rage quit painting. I am experiencing mild mood swings, and some other annoying but minor mental health issues. Academically I am doing fine. Nothing unordinary, just doing the bare minimum to keep my grades up (and that's all i want). I have been doing more art again, which makes me pretty happy, and I have been working hard at both of my jobs (though I am also working less, unfortunately). I've made some good progress with my porn addiction as well. I relapse no more than once a week now, and hope to get better in the coming weeks. My physical health is on a roll too, I am doing sports for the first time since high school, and i am exercising daily. The biggest downside is that I am spending a lot lately (mostly necessary purchases like repairing an instrument or transportation, but quite a bit of avoidable spending as well, such as jewelry). I am somewhat worried about not saving up enough for the long-term future, but so far I have been not burning through my savings at a rate too high. Wish you all a nice Sunday, Po

Good luck! Po

Woahhh!!! Congrats on your successes, and I hope that you will be able to continue to strive forward (and upward) spite of all the bumps on your road 🙂 Po

Hi Vojta! A few years ago I faced a very similar issue and I relate a lot to feeling this way during like every summer of my life. I am currently 20 y.o., 2nd year in University. In high school I struggled with gaming greatly, and had to push myself incredbily hard to keep my grades from plummeting into the 60-70% range. Once I joined university, I left my gaming PC at home (which allowed me to focus on academics more) and discovered a lot of new things I enjoy doing. However, gaming addiction did not go away until nearly two years later, as every time I would go home I'd be back gaming. But now, I am typing from that very trouble-bringing gaming PC, and I have no urges to play games whatsoever. How/why did that happen?.. It happened because I: Forced myself away from gaming (although leaving my access to gaming didn't eliminate the addiction, it was very helpful). I also installed many, many apps restricting social media and screentime. DM me if you want to know what they are 🙂 Created a routine of self-care, which I initially hated/didn't do right. This means that every day, I do something that is actually good for myself, from getting enough sleep, to exercising in some way, to eating in a balanced way. Threw away self-imposed labels. Before, I used to think "I am not good at social stuff" or "I am not smart enough to get good grades". This is what largely kept me at bay, addicted to games, not having passion for other things. Noticing and correcting such ways of thinking has enabled me to become a better person. Now, this is likely the most difficult thing on the list. But, there are lots of resources to help you with this: for me, it was "PsychoCybernetics". Don't force myself to do things I do not like and that are unnecessary, such as eating healthy/unhealthy food too much. Contrary to @Alexanderle, I believe that a "healthy" diet does not make one happy; we do not choose what foods we like; but we do have the ability to find ways to eat both foods we like and foods that we need, or even combine the two. In other words, step away from activities that do not make you happy (even if they are labeled as "good" by yourself or others), reflect on why they make you unhappy and what you can do to change that. Give yourself room to breathe. Other things I recommend: Make a planner, set deadlines for yourself! This has been super crucial to me, as I also would just not do things because they weren't really necessary. I did the schoolwork during the year, but in the summer I was just free 24/7. Making a planner, and setting personal deadlines for myself helped me stay productive and gain discipline. Even simple things like "do laundry by __" or "read to page __ on Tuesday" matter. Create and expand routines. Start with something simple, like drinking 6 cups of water every day, that is incredibly easy to accomplish but still doesn't just "happen". Do something that requires a bit of discipline and attention to yourself and the world around you. Once you can maintain that activity, add something else on top; repeat ad infinitum. Do things gradually. It is impossible to change in one day. Always remember that. But even the biggest cloud (sorry love clouds lol) is made out of thousands of tiny raindrops. The building block to success is taking things one step at a time, in a pace that you can keep up with no matter the weather. Lastly, Discover things that you can be a part of to keep yourself accountable. By having your actions impact others or having other people be aware of your actions/goals, it will be easier to hold yourself accountable while also staying connected and having a bigger, more meaningful impact on the world around you. No one can become super successful on their own. "Join communities, create and do things that impact a lot of other people, not just yourself"- that has been my way of becoming a better person, at least. Not saying this is what you need to do, but recommend to try it out. This is all, hope you find something here new/helpful. Best of luck on your journey, you will succeed! Maybe not today or tomorrow, but you will 🙂 Po

yayyyyy 🙂 hope that you will have the ability to keep up this streak of good days!

Idk, I am someone who has a lot of hobbies too. But I am also a very busy person, and need to be careful with which hobbies I can commit to and which I can spend maybe 1hr/week on. Do not know what the case is for you, but I do recommend to try to balance hobbies and other things well to avoid getting burned out. For me, feeling burned out about one of y passions (when I paint too much, for example) is extremely stressful and triggers some of the worst gaming urges. Po

Hi Dirac! As someone who has done a lot of work/some research on back issues and posture, I'm wondering if you have ever heard of Alexander's Technique? Reading your other entries along the way, it seems like you are going back to gaming because of high stress. That was the case for me too, and even now I get stronger urges to go back to gaming whenever I experience highly stressful situations. Have you thought of developing different stress coping mechanisms? For me, I've learned to create a routine: instead of gaming, first I listen to my favorite music, then go to the bathroom for as long as I want to (helps me calm down and also hydrate lol), and then journal here I am still not feeling well. Try coming up with a similar series of events that will help you lower your stress and stay away from gaming! It is highly important to dedicate time to finding new ways of finding the same satisfaction gaming provides, even if it doesn't feel like a priority, because it will save you thousands of hours of time and great amounts of self-esteem and overall mental health. But I bet you know that already heh. Po

Haha they're good! i'd be careful to not get overworked with such a long list. More is less at times, blah blah blah you know. Try to get very passionate about one or two, so passionate that gaming will seem less appealing in comparison. For me, such hobbies have become calisthenics (I love exercising), and painting. But, I am also overloaded with work and academics, and simply don't have time to game. So, I think you have some great choices! Just make sure that you actually enjoy/are interested in all of them 🙂

I had a similar problem, and there were two components to it, in my case: fixing the "symptoms" (internet+phone addiction) and the underlying cause (lack of meaningful social interaction, aka loneliness, for me). The solution to the symptoms was not getting rid of my phone completely (cuz let's be honest, camera, GPS, social media and internet are, at times, very useful), but rather getting a lot of restriction apps on it (I use "Stay Focused", premium is only like $7 but saves me hours worth of time). There are multiple ways to commit strongly to blocking apps, such as randomly generating a password for screen time, sending it to a friend/erasing it, and then never ever having the option of finding out what it is (thus no way of getting rid of screen time blocks). Although it is a lot of effort, and perhaps money, to set the apps up, it is completely worth it as the time and money you will gain in return outweighs that greatly. But, I would also focus on fixing the underlying cause, since as long as it persists, you will not be able to get rid of the addiction completely or will likely to replace it with another (for me, that was TV shows). Not sure what the cause is for you, and how exactly to fix it- that is up to you to determine. My two cents. However, selling your phone is also an option, just not the one that I have chosen. Po

Yayyy!!! So happy for you 🙂

Day 124, continued: Mental Health Reflection: After dinner, things have gotten a bit better. I am still feeling weak, kind of empty, and in general unmotivated, but it's not as terrible as it was. I'll just have to get through it, I'll be fine soon. I'll consider going to counseling if this continues, but so far it's been a great term, and I hope that this was a once-in-a-while accident. Good things: On top of my academics, still Successfully quitting porn bit by bit every day My plant's doing well I am playing more volleyball, though I still suck lol I've been practicing badminton with my partner and it has been a blast I'm keeping my room clean, and managed to get the ants out of it I've survived most of today! Well, that kind of does it for today, peeps. Thank you very much for following me on this journey, I value you a lot 🙂 Po

Day 124. I think I'll start journaling a bit more often as I have not been able to manage my stress in healthy ways recently. Gaming Reflection: Honestly, not much. I still follow a couple game developers, but that's about it. I am no longer watching gameplay or browsing reddit for more than 5 minutes per day. Games are highly unappealing at the moment. Perhaps the urges will come back sometime, but right now I am feeling much better. Mental Health Reflection: Oh, this has been tough. It has been a rather busy time for me the last two weeks, so I have completely submerged into the "super effective" mode in order to stay on top of things. On one hand, I am succeeding- all of my grades are where I want them to be, I am rarely forgetting about important events and such (though there has been one class lecture I missed). I feel smart with my time- I only watch 10 minutes of TV show per day, and have been almost two weeks without porn. However, some things are sliding. I think I am being such an effective work machine, that I am forgetting how to carve out time for completely personal activities, like working on bigger art projects. For one, I've spent over an hour trying to paint today, but literally nothing came out of it. I am unsure why, but I simply got more and more upset as I was developing my ideas, and my urge to quit art, like forever, was incredibly powerful. No fun. I am not sure if I should seek counseling with this issue, or will be able to solve it on my own, but it is a huge annoyance to me, as I really used to enjoy painting a lot, but now... I can't make art unless it is for a client/class. Will continue in a couple hours, have to get dinner now! Take care of yourselves people, Po

Yayyayayayay! Congrats on that! I know it has been a rocky road so far, but you made it this far 🙂 Super happy for you! Po

Hehe, the most difficult steps are the first ones! You will get to all these places, and beyond, eventually! It might seem very far, but it's completely possible 😉 Po

Day 117. Super busy week. Have limited myself to 10 minutes of TV show per day, and have not been able to watch even that much on Wednesday and Thursday. It's been quite insane, but today I got to relax for a bit. Reflection on gaming this week: I have been spending less time looking at gaming videos and all social media! I feel much better in terms of not being controlled by social media and such. I still do occasionally end up not being in control of my time, like today (watched like 40 minutes of my show, oops), but it is certainly an improvement. I am setting up my steam account for family sharing (I think that's how it's called) so my college friends can use it. There are only 6 games on it, but 3 of them are couch co-op, one is from 2003 lol. Although I do feel guilty passing what I find fairly evil to someone else, I also acknowledge that games can be good in proper settings. All of these games have made a positive impact on me, taught me a few skills, and helped me connect with real people. Couch co-op is good stuff. Reflection on mental health this week: Surprisingly good. I expected to plummet under such high stress, but it appears that I am winning over it. I have not relapsed with most of my bad habits up until today (but even today, it was the smallest of my bad habits- watching tv). Past weekend, and a couple days before that have been very bad in terms of time management and self control; that made me quite upset, but after reflecting on it for awhile, a breakthrough happened, I suppose? Not sure exactly what has made things go better from there, but it has happened. Hope to keep it this way. Things are shaping up not the best, but far from the worst at the moment. If I continue to keep things this way, I will succeed academically and professionally. However, my relationship with my partner has been, uh, gaining self-awareness? We both have been noting the problems our relationship has developed recently. I think that is good, but neither of us has thought of sitting down and finding solutions yet. Other good things: I have just started doing exercise after a week off! Feels great, very excited to feel my body fully again, for like the 5th time this year lol My phone is awesome, I only need to charge it every 3-5 days. Best $150 of the year. I got a plant! I have not been watching porn for almost a full week, which is way above average. Next goal: infinity and beyond! Hosting a job-related event yesterday went great. My first Art Project turned out very nice. Co-Workers and Friends have been giving me appreciation 🙂 That's all for now, hope to visit this place a bit more often next week. Have a weekend, Po

Thank you so much for all these tips! I will have yet another interview coming up in a week, and will certainly keep these in mind during the process! I really appreciate you sharing these, quite a lot of them are very new to me.

I second what Zeno and your counselors have said. Sometimes, a fight isn't worth it, and it's best to step back and find better options. People say "run", but what it's really simply giving yourself enough space and control to find better options. Because you do deserve better. And he does too, I bet, but it should must not be your responsibility to get him off the hook. It's best to walk away. Trust your counselors and therapists.

Hey @The Chosen One, I feel you! Last week (and this one too, honestly) (and the week before last week too, ehh) I have been receiving a lot of bad news that just keep piling up. Although I do not know the impact of your bad news and the current state of life, I do think that I have felt very similar to what you are feeling quite recently. I'm sorry that you are going through this, and hope that things will get better soon! What helped me get past this series of unfortunate events was to simply force myself to keep trying- I got rejected from 10 out 10 places I applied for (so far, lol), but I understand that at some point I will get accepted. It won't be my "1st choice" of a position, but it is better than nothing. Bold of me to assume, but I'd like to think that you would prefer something over nothing, too? Imagine yourself looking back at where you are now in a few weeks/months/years- even if not giving up/continuing to do work in the right direction will not yield results, you will be able to say "I tried my best". Dunno if that alone is enough to keep you at it, but start here. Even if the results are not what you wanted, the process itself is of extreme value. Keep trying! Po

Hi Ted, welcome to GameQuitters! I think it is super amazing that your parents and family in general are supportive of you, and hope that this forum will a place of support and care for you too! Best of luck getting rid of gaming addiction, looking forward to reading more of your journal entries. Po

Alright, it has been quite awhile! I apologize for not posting for so long. All is well, actually. Day 110. So close to 111 hehe. It's been a very busy time lately. Not that I do not have any time for leisure or whatever, but it has been mostly limited to watch-tv-show-while-eating kind of thing. I have been doing a lot of academic and professional work, as well as spending more quality time with my partner. Overall, life has been getting better, especially compared to where I was a week ago. A few drawbacks, though: I have relapsed with porn, twice last week. Doing well right now but that was not pleasant. Lots of regrets and all that. Also, I just feel like I do not have that much time for things I actually enjoy. Usually, I feel that way anyways, but end up having plenty of time for all kinds of things anyways. But right now, I have such a busy weekend ahead of me that I am not sure if I will be able to paint much. But, I must admit, it was completely my own decision to get so busy, and I can't deny that I do enjoy it, in a good way 🙂 Good things from lately: Played some volleyball for the first time since freshman high school. Woah. I definitely sucked, but it was a ton of fun. Hope to get some personal practice in before next game! My music skills have been developing faster. Although I am still not sure about value my music provides to me and the world in general, I am glad to be progressing. I have been super into exercising. Not a full-body workout every day, but just a physically active lifestyle overall. Feels like I am connecting with people more actively and in a better way. I enjoy talking more, at least, and it is happening more often. Urges for watching gameplay/going to social media have been lower than general. I simply do not feel like taking the phone out of my pocket. Yes, I am bored, but it feels good somehow. Alright, feel like doing some exercise. Hope y'all are able to find time for self-care over the weekend! Po

Ohhh, that sounds so awesome to me! Glad you were able to have this conversation! I kind of disconnected from my friends that had some serious chemistry with gaming (not due to games, just life in general), but I also hope to meet them here someday. Hope you keep it up 🙂

Day 103 Yesterday was a day of <recent> past choices catching up to me. And the vaccine side effects, too. Missed two both personally and professionally important events that I was looking forward to attending because I had trouble focusing and keeping my mind together; but also, I have been too focused on academics and jobs lately. Yes, I am acing those, but it takes a lot of my time and focus, and so I end up forgetting about other important things. And, turns out that I missed a friend's BD that I was totally unaware of. Sux big time man. So right now, I am feeling down, but also incredibly energized, as those mistakes give me a chance to reflect on what I am doing wrong, and to improve my situation. I think that starting right now, I will be making reminders/alarms for all important meetings for the upcoming week, and look up tips on being less forgetful. In terms of gaming, I am not very occupied with it because of high stress. Which is surprising! It used to be completely the other around a few months ago. However, I relapsed with porn yesterday, and that was a lot of regret and guilt on my mind. Bleaurgh, I hate it. I think that I was experiencing so much brain fog that a part of my regular consciousness was simply gone. Unfortunate, but from mistakes we learn. Alright, gotta go, a work meeting is starting. Stay strong y'all. @WhoCares, hope to hear from you soon 🙂 Don't give up! I'm always rooting for you. Po

Day 101. Got the covid vaccine. Glad I won't get COVID but jeez the side effects are pretty tough on me. Headache, weakness and dizziness, and light fever. Not that bad, I know, but I was hoping to be enjoying the vaccine a bit more lol. Staying good on no gaming, spent less time watching/researching game stuff today than usual, cuz it seems like nothing interesting is happening. Now, how do I make those things less interesting when they happen? *Will answer in the next entry*

Day 99. Could say that I am approaching a milestone, but at this point it is just routine lol. Will celebrate at 111 days, how about that? Small reflection on gaming: Definitely watching more game-related stuff than usual today and this past week overall. Understand what has caused it- lots of game-related news and feeling nostalgic, but not having the will to stop doing those activities. However, I do need to. Games begin to occupy my brain more once again, and I do not want to go through the urges. I really should be reading more, and learning art, music, and all that stuff. Have to get passionate! Short Reflection on mental health from today: Feeling just fine! Must say, I've actually been feeling more disciplined and confident, and have been doing better at doing activities that are important but socially uncomfortable, such as reminding other students on campus to follow COVID guidelines. Muhahaha, I feel the power! Good things from today: Watched some video game stuff that made me happy, to some extent Stayed on top of my stuff, taking barely any breaks and getting sooo much done. Feeling tired, but also very satisfied with what I've accomplished. Received lots of $$$ from my University from my personal summer projects. Yay, school-related expenses are completely covered now. Got my textbooks for a class wayyy before they were supposed to arrive. My phone is so awesome, it barely loses any battery when idle. I have to recharge it only once every 4-5 days 😮 Enjoying sunny weather, although I am feeling too hot already grrrr Random thought: I began noticing that the thought of following a game's development/watching videos of people playing it together is much more fun that the thought of playing it myself. I think what I get from following dev diaries and watching people play together is seeing people be passionate about something they love doing, and just fulfilling my need for observing social interaction 🙂 It's honestly not the game itself at this point. Hope that your week is starting out well, Po

Hey! Since you're drawing, I recommend to try out ArtProf- its an awesome, totally free community of professional artists making tons and tons of art tutorials every week (YouTube), providing individual critique and assistance on Discord, and even more resources on their website. Look them up! I'm doing lots of art too at the moment, and ArtProf has helped me tremendously. It is very much one-of-a-kind community of artists that is usually impossible to find for the price of free. Po