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Amphibian220

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Everything posted by Amphibian220

  1. Something about this subject of indecent films. As children many people are exposed to particular types of popular films and other media promoted by the government. In many of these films, female characters are portrayed in a sexually revealing and accessible way. And this is being shown to children. These types of films program from a young age that personal desires are the pedestal of goals, and carry over into adolescence. There was the school ball, where I saw boys making inappropriate comments to their female classmates. And of course intoxicants had to be there, because popular films depicted them as essential. Why should desires be on a pedestal? If you look at the history of where you come from, your ancestors were truly hierarchical and were healthy and that is because the rules of their life made them so.
  2. This is the recurring narrative in journals. If the job is not serving a great mission, we try to change it for something that carries meaning. But as time passes, we dont invest enough energy in it. So now we have to put ourselves through a trial to break out somehow. But if within some time, I don't see results, I start pondering whether I should go back to careless living. Mediocre goals are not an alternative to gaming. Drifting to low performance? Keep standards absolute. The way in which i continued persisting in going after my goal as an athlete is by reading the very long battles of world athletes that took them decades of focused work. But this focused work will not mean anything if you are not having a good time and brothers who support you
  3. your answer is ciphered in a way. You have to try to recollect why sport and brotherhood you turned away from. Was your discipline already affected by the addiction? Was there some conditioning i.e. fear of losing, of being disliked, that led to the gaming becoming stronger. Do you experience low energy after abstaining from the video game for some time? If that happens, which is most likely the case, you have to slog through it and set up a daily routine with a replacement treat. If it is not going to be a video game, it has to be a sport where you can get some thrills every evening outside your home. My gaming habit was so disruptive that I had to run out of the house after school to prevent myself from playing. So ridding myself of access to the game did it. I felt a total waste, laying in bed feeling that I lost an opportunity, but seeing peers content with life Without playing games gave me a new perspective. hope this better helps you to decipher your answer.
  4. Welcome to this self accountability forum. But let me ask you this, in this 53 day stretch of not playing video games what were you focused on and thinking about, were you fired up about a goal of some sort? Like winning a sports tournament etc?
  5. I played an old board game. I decided to play to escape, and it was not doing the trick, so I went for my friday training session. This felt much better. I haven't secured a job that was my goal yet. Will continue searching
  6. Week 15, 16 My attitude to work got worse and I’ve got a need to escape. One of my peak performances was a part time coffee shop position, when I was most committed and happy about what I was doing. I haven’t noticed that anybody else is invested in this workplace. Its like everybody is here just for some exposure, call it an internship or what you may. I seem the only one wanting to establish a strategy for growth. Nobody is bothered in thinking through a project, just their direct line of duty. I can better understand these projects, but have much less energy than I did a year ago. I saw a homeless man on the street jokingly tell a young woman to give him shelter as a start to their romantic relationship.
  7. System trap elaborated the new management turns down requests for new stationery equipment because it is expensive, but this team organized a very extravagant celebration of our successfully completed project. Following on from this, they are likely to increase expenditure on recreational activities. Would a monthly party make us more productive? I am more in favour of jogging at the end of each working day.
  8. This is another stage in becoming stronger as a man, wishing your family well.
  9. Week 14, I no longer want to change my routine, Im quite happy with it at work and at home. But chronic fear of dismissal for the last two years has had a toll on my morale. I got anxious over three dismissals at my workplace so far. One of them is a very talented professional. I just do all of my things in a very dejected way, so its the mind I have got to fix. I was a happier guy when I was in competition with folks in another department, but now since they were replaced, I just don't get the same kind of thrill from showing better results than the new group.
  10. When you say you want to do more in life, do you want to do more on your own or for other members of your group to take part in your work? It demoralizes me to have to work without having a connection with guys whom I could lead or who could lead me. What if we can change ourselves, our families and then communities through our struggle? We won’t have to adapt to no society then.
  11. Ok, so there is this protest being voiced at work over a dismissal of a long time employee. I am not familiar with the situation very well and dont want to take part in any deliberations with the manager. They are following a dispute resolution framework. Im just thinking if I was laid off for whatever reason now, it would be really hard to find a new place because I’ve grown used to my old place. It also seems that working many years in the same job limits what you can do in the future except in circumstances where you are exposed to growth.
  12. Week 13 Got burned out with a new work assignment this week and decided to relax by listening to a podcast. Later on I switched on a radio and fell asleep to a random talk show. I don't know if it is good to fall asleep with background noise like that.
  13. The streak continued today, but on top of it I ate less food. I feel hungry but I will go ahead and try this for a week. I joined a book club which is another great way to forget about my work
  14. I spent today without any phone or TV use, I visited a friend and had a brief conversation with him.
  15. you trust yourself by overriding desires. I want to get to that level of control Because in a situation of stress I want to watch shows and this gets out of control. By journaling and working out more, i get more ability to do the harder things.
  16. Week 11 And 12 I attended all of my basketball training sessions. The game got better and Im hoping I will get better at falling cause when it gets competitive, it becomes a wrestling contest. Work got easier, but I need to learn a new program to work with. I feel like Im below my expected level at work but doing well in sport. I should become a professional basketball player and participate in amateur leagues.
  17. Welcome to Game quitters Can you share about your interests outside of gaming? What sports or school subjects are you interested in?
  18. Patrick welcome back! Do you sometimes feel you lack a healthy pressure release to feel relieved? I thought about preventing rumination and found out that it either has to be a challenging job or an academic project, or a difficult team to beat in training. When I was at uni, I was afraid of losing at soccer, so much so that all the worrying about other issues didn't carry any weight. Why do we have to frequently worry of all the things that can go wrong? This kind of knowledge just takes us out. I think believing in your power of action and consistency can prove that things that appear to be out of control are not worth thinking over.
  19. You stated that you strive for perfection. I think that this trait carried over into your journaling: you started this new journal to be perfect because the old was tainted with a relapse. This attitude may present problems if you only view relapses as a bad thing (which you don’t). Relapses carry important information and analyzing them to better understand the self repeating cycle can give a strategic picture to enable you to break out of that cycle. Your record is very good and is certainly not lost by that controlled relapse. booksandtrees presented a good topic for identifying a reason for a relapse. The acronym HALTED enabled me to stop just in time and reflect why I want to play a game. Then at some point, we get the idea that living without these mind blockers (internet, games) makes us healthier and more aware but may also make us sad because we understand our value and weaknesses and that there is a lot of work ahead. I say to myself to fight the sadness with patience, consistency , brave action and persevere to do good for my community and find supporters.
  20. At times I am torn between watching a sport on TV or relaxing in a different way. And almost always I choose watching TV because the impression is that it is easier and more fun. I held off just one night from watching it which I have not done in months and on the next day I felt much better and then I’ve said to myself I will continue to track how my nutrition, sleep improves (no TV before bed time) over time. Wait it out, and find a group to do or track the hobby with. When you practice a sport in a group, you have much better awareness of how it is helping.
  21. I slipped into watching NBA league and overeating snacks. I will no longer watch this today and just accept moments of boredom and see where this is going to take me.
  22. Cam posted a video about a certain type of games that attracted men: There is a strong sense of urgency or a “closing window”, like in a 2-D platform where the player has to constantly make very quick decisions to save his character from getting killed. The game constantly engages the player’s attention. This sense of urgency made players forget about real life problems that caused worrying and stress. During my university years, fear of humiliation was a strong motivator to revise and do research, look for work etc. This fear of humiliation would have been good to some extent, but because it went beyond all bounds people started to notice it. So no longer did I want a job because of a goal of doing something beneficial. I was forced to do it because otherwise the peers, tutors or people in the government would abuse me. Real life goals meant fear and psychological fatigue. The video game did not punish me if I failed in it. Just about then we had a new trainee join at work who decided to complain to our managers that they were not doing their job. It was amazing to me: they could not suppress her with humiliation or fear, she continued expressing in what and how they were failing. This girl felt okay with being dismissed. Another thing that helped me understand something were successful people who dropped out of universities because they knew what they wanted to do. All this brought me to the conclusion that poorly defined goals will make me depend on fear and wanting to meet expectations. Well defined goals will make me immune to psychological manipulation by employers and other people. I went on a skiing trip to France and after the event I understood that I wanted to go because I felt happier in a group. Without going with other students I would have felt lonely. But at the trip there was a lot of acting due to expectations: You have to say things that are cool, ski a certain way. The more rebellious I acted, the happier I felt.
  23. Do you dread that racing simulator or does it require you to work so much (no easy rewards, no obsessive playing) that it does not control you? Do you feel that in the future a sport can become an obsession for you ? . Skiing can be a fun healthy activity, but some people go into it for the risk and daring stunts. Risking in this way stabilizes their minds because their other life can be unbearably boring.
  24. Need to better understand how to handle work issues. A new trainee at work whom I have the task of showing the ropes is refusing to do some of the essentials because he has heard of other trainees who were not obliged to do so. The other trainees some of whom have since resigned and others progressed to higher roles don't justify this kind of behaviour, but this trainee will sabotage work and take as an example the most passive workers. It looks like a race to the bottom. Then as I accepted refusal to do some things, this trainee refused a new round of tasks on the same grounds. The more I conceded, the more passive he became. I want to throw him out of my organization because I will most likely embarass myself in front of my manager.
  25. Relapsed by watching a film on a movie website. The film was ok, but I was watching it to avoid solving my current issues. It happened because I haven’t been correctly tracking my changing needs and my daily schedule is long out if date. Need to quickly implement changes today. My basketball sessions are going to resume and we’re going to play a guest team soon.
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