Ace92

Day 1 Solid day - disappointed myself at the end by turning to youtube while eating dinner, which ended up taking a longer time. I noticed that when watching videos you eat much slower than you normally would, at least i do, and that wastes a lot of time. Tomorrow I'm going to try eating all my meals as if I were surrounded by friends (in some cases i actually might be and in those moments i don't use my phone) and see how it feels. Today was nice though because I'm very close to figuring out my roommate situation at my apartment, I ate lunch with friends and I managed to code, learning basic python. I have to say, I've only done a couple of lessons but it's so fascinating. Improvement for tomorrow: Meditate, No youtube - or try to limit it Get to bed before 10:00 pm - with no phone for an hour or two beforehand Gratitude: God friends sweatshirts Bless, Ace

Hi, I want to make clear, I'm not cutting off my friends, I just need to put less of my dependence on them. I was focusing so much on the relationships that their absence in a moment or their presence would determine my happiness. This isn't always a bad thing but it was happening in an unhealthy amount in my case. Not cutting friends off, but focusing on myself more. Bless, Ace

Sounds like you're off to a great start in reducing your video game usage. Audiobooks/books/podcasts are also something i want to look into. Do you have any idea of which ones you'd want to listen to? Bless, ace

Hello there, I have decided to delete my old journal as I didn't feel my goals lined up with my current ones. Reality is, I don't want to quit playing video games. I know I have them under control now where I can play in moderation. They're not a necessity, but a fun hobby I enjoy engaging with. The issue I'm struggling with most is YouTube, but honestly I only use it when I'm eating or when I am tired and don't want to do anything else, a downtime activity. The reason I'm here however, is that YouTube still takes up a lot of my screen time, since it forces me to go on my phone. I don't want to remove it completely, but I also want to replace it with other things and turn to books or podcasts instead of YouTube. Additionally, I noticed I was getting upset. I discovered that I was depending so much upon others for happiness that I was still investing energy into my break up. Friends, significant others, they come and go, so i can't have my happiness depend on them, it needs to come from me or family. That's why I'm here, I want to build a life where I can wake up most days and say, "I'm excited for today" or I am content in most situations. I want to live fully in the present rather than worrying about the future. This will be no small feat, and I won't accomplish this quickly but let's take a look at the things I want to do. Fix my sleep schedule: Wake up each morning at 6:00 AM, and in bed sleeping by 10:00 PM, with no screens prior for 1-2 hours Read, read, read: classic books, non-fiction, memoirs, fantasy— i want to read it all Meditation: studies have shown it's beneficial for sleep, mental health, and mindfulness exercise/working out: this time i actually want to learn what my body type is and what food and exercises I should do to grow muscle and weight. Until then, basic lifting and cardio [running/walking] will suffice. Foreign languages: I want to communicate and learn about different cultures so someday I can visit them and connect with locals—i hope to learn French, Spanish, and Japanese Instruments: I love listening to music, so this is a no brainer, I want to study different genres of music, learn music theory and be able to read it. Additionally I want to learn Guitar, drums, piano, violin, cello, saxophone, and improve my singing voice. Dancing: I want to get better at it Cooking/baking: I see my friends sometimes or on Instagram, bake all these tasty foods, and it's an essential skill to learn. The only foods I know how to make currently are eggs and pasta. I need to learn more Painting/drawing: another downtime activity Coding: I want to learn python, Java etc. These are a lot of goals, I may be too ambitious. So I'm only going to focus with one or two as of now. But I have genuine interest in all of these and I think I'll be able to narrow it down to two or three hobbies once I learn what I like/dislike. For the rest of December I'll be focusing on meditation, working on my sleep schedule, and learning to code. My goal: satisfaction/happiness—at least most of the time Bless, ace

Good to hear you're making great progress! Where are you getting those graphs from? They've piqued my interest. Best, Ace

Those pictures are beautiful! I've always wanted to get into fishing more. Perhaps I will try it as one of my hobbies. Interesting thought. I listen to music almost everywhere I go, it serves as a way to calm my brain and anxieties down. This made me think about how music isn't needed everywhere. Maybe I should try to just listen to the atmosphere and sounds around me. Keep up the good work! Ace

Sounds like things are going well. And yeah, journaling has helped me stay consistent already. stay safe. best, ace

I'm learning French on duolingo as well. I agree that its too similar to a game. I think it's definitely marketed towards kids/pre-teens to make them interested in languages. That said, it could've been designed this way so consumers don't become bored while learning. My mom is using it for German, and she is always concerned at where she is at on the leaderboard. So it is effective. Either way, duolingo isn't going to help you become fluent in a language. As the others said to actually learn a language you really need to be invested in it, take classes, learn about the culture, listen to music, podcasts etc. All duolingo is good for is the basics, i find. Hope you can find other resources to help you. best, ace

I struggle with this as well. I was afraid of trying new activities because I was afraid of failure. I was afraid of failure because I was afraid of being mocked. If I never tried I would never be mocked. I don't know if this will help as everyone is different, but what helped me overcome my fear of failure was thinking about how sad I was just sitting around wasting my time. If I never failed then, I would never become comfortable with failure. I would always be insecure. Doing a dopamine detox is a good idea. Those instant gratification activities are dangerous. what helped me start new hobbies was taking that useless junk and finding the alternative for it. for example, sitting around all day listening to music (through headphones), was a big problem for me. It kept me in my comfort zone. It made me have dreams of me doing amazing things. Though nothing was getting done. So, when I said goodbye to headphones. I turned to reading, which filled my mind with amazing stories. I'm also starting to learn guitar. i don't know what you are interested in but you could turn gaming into learning how to code. reading is also a great option. another suggestion i have is learning a language. Hope all goes well with your journey. best, ace

nice to hear you were able spend quality time with those around you! i hope to become more extroverted myself. if you have any suggestions, i'd love to hear them. glad your day went well yesterday! best, ace

congratulations on making the decision to quit games! i wish you luck on your journey! best, ace

Hello Everyone, I'm back. I fell back into old habits. The same habits I tried to remove. Most of the day I watched YouTube. Around 2:00 PM, I entered my room before taking my shower. There, I saw my bed, unmade. Seeing the mess of blankets I thought to myself, "I hate this. Why am I living my life this way? Not making my bed, just watching videos..." From that experience, I knew I had to try again. So, here I am. My problems that led to relapse consisted of two things. One, I was doing too many activities. Two, I was actively trying to avoid games/music. These reasons relate to each other. Instead of focusing on one or two habits I wanted to achieve, my goals were sporadic. So, whenever I faced urges I forced myself to be quick on my feet and do something that wasn't music or screens. While my new year goals stay the same, I am changing the way I do things. Each month I will write down 2 goals I want to focus on. I will start small. From there I will just keep building. Rather than trying to focus on 13-15 general goals. This will allow me to pay more attention to what my goals are. Furthermore, since they will be more specific, it will give me something to do every day. Which is what I struggled with last time. Here we go. Activities I want to Avoid: Listening to Music all day Watching YouTube all day Using my phone (if not for calls, texts or emails) Activities I want to do (Goals I have): Drive every day I am home to pass my drivers exam this year Read about writing and write every day to improve my writing Read every day Workout every day (except Sundays) Go to bed at 9:00 PM each night so I can hit a consistent 7-8 hours of sleep. Eat healthier foods (i.e. Smoothies, Fruits, Dairy, Vegetables, Grains, High-protein foods, and more fruits) Goals for this Month: Go to bed at 9:00 PM each night so I can hit a consistent 7-8 hours of sleep Workout every day (except Sundays) Best Wishes, Ace

This post is late because I unfortunately relapsed. I relapsed to music. I thought after my cleaning yesterday, I had no urges, which was true at first. But closer to the end of the day my urges snuck up to me and I ashamed to say, gave in. What I think I need to do is focus on one thing at a time and put my all into changing the habit. Since I really have had no interest in playing games at all recently (even when my mom got me a game-related calendar) i did not play. What I am going to put my all into is trying to get over my music addiction since that is taking up most of my time. Furthermore I think the other half of it besides the sexual visions, is I want to achieve big things or maybe it is I finally want to prove to people that I am worth something. I think its the latter because most of my life I was either bullied or ignored by my so called friends. Even now, I feel like my friends are ignoring me and they don't see worth in me because they are always texting the other friends in the group but never text me, therefore I get lonely and cave in. I further feel that I need to do these things so I can prove to them that I am a cool person. I think music may be a quick easy access point to that. But I don't need to prove anything. If my friends are ignoring me, that's their choice cause there's always more people. Anyway I think the biggest thing I will have to do is sell my headphones but I'm afraid I will upset my parents cause they spent a lot of money to buy these headphones for me. I got them 2 years ago, so just selling them a few years later might upset them. Then again, they do tell me to wear them less so it might be a good option. I am going to try to go a year without music 1/5/23 - 1/5/24 Best Wishes Ace

Yeah i get this too. The other day I didn't feel like working on my short story so I did some drawing instead. During these days I think it's important to have those back up hobbies, the mindless ones where you can just do it while relaxing. I don't necessarily see it as a fault. Personally I think we need days like this to recharge after days of working. So doing activities like reading or drawing or even taking a hot bath provides us with that sense of relaxation that we crave without turning to games. Sounds like you're making good progress on your goals. Keep going! Best Wishes, Ace

routines are a good way to keep consistent with habits and avoid games. keep it up! Best Wishes, Ace