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About zeke365

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  1. zeke365

    What to do with a gaming PC now?

    I think the best thing is to learn how to make 3D models realistically and render them in video using blender, I think that would help push you to the limit but without gaming because your learning how to compare a photo of real photo and how to mimic to another, or you could try to learn animation like I do to help push the animation software to limit with your own stories by learning how to animate, write, direct, voice act, etc. The choice is up to you. Ask yourself this what do you want to learn?
  2. zeke365

    Zeke Journel Round 2

    Top Tap detox days 9-17 minus 4 =12 So this week has not been as successful as like it to be and I did not accomplish much may be due to weather but it seemed like my old habits resurfaced again this week. You may be wondering why I have minus 4 to the days well that because I m taking 4 days that were not successful this week off since I did not accomplish what I wanted to. I think when we mess up we constantly blame ourselves for messing up and then puts us in more shame and makes us relapse or we start over so many times because we feel we need to restart. It's not that we need to restart each and everytime, what we should be looking at what went wrong and how can we learn from it? Instead of saying "I messed up better start at day one again." Now if you have to do it do it but I just do it bit different. Reflection time: To help explain this I will say this, I m fighting 4 addictions, not just one addiction. Think of this way a wheel Internet Anime Gaming So what happened here is I have always relied on one for the other so if I fasted one, I replaced with the other never ending the cycle. Porn This wheel helps explain it a little better so you see when I took gaming away I replaced with anime so I never really changed only the content I consumed changed. So gaming addiction I freed myself from that and now I m dealing with anime addiction which seems to be much harder addiction that first I did not think I had but then realized I did. Anime and animation more on the anime side then animation but I think they're both improtant. So Anime and animation and gaming is taken out what there left porn and internet so when I fast I seem to try to find a replacement like it but that not what its about here (no this not about moderation in gaming) but what means it should be balanced between the activities we do never going overboard with an addiction but still have enough variety to satisfy your needs. There are times I almost do not want internet at all and be in rehab away from tech for awhile just so I could see life with a new lens. There one person I have never forgiven and it shocked me that I have never forgiven this person but have as others to forgive this person and the person I need to forgive the most is myself, yes you need to learn to forgive yourself for the wrongs you did and be healed from that and that is not easy. So I m thinking of buying a new journal that would do just that forgiving myself that won't be shared here but for my sake. Plus I noticed something odd there no support for anime addiction which kinda shocked me but if you know me to let me know. The good news is I will finally get everything transferred to the new Pc while finish one more review on my old pc of anime and then I start using the new Pc more often which I m really excited about. Plus I created a new rule called Tutorial sundays this means on Sundays while I m allowed youtube I can learn some tutorials about my animation software, PowerDirector, audacity, etc. to help improve my content on youtube. The second thing I m not why it works this way but does is I have my phone play faith-based music as I worked on a project but if I did directly through the Pc I would not pay attention to it but neat trick yes I could stop and stuff but the phone seems harder to stop than say inside the pc. So that neat little trick I will still have rest days like Friday and Saturday and I did subscribe to a youtube channel and the reason is I got so involved with it that I need to support them and commenting on their videos and stuff. The youtube channel is called Glove and boots, plus they make they make me laugh so hard and sometimes we just need a good laugh once in awhile. I hope this does not break my animation fast or anything oh, by the way, I did see Lego movie 2 and really liked it I m still planning on getting to see few more movie this year but that about it. That it for today have a wonderful day Grateful: 1.God 2.Family 3.Church 4.Bible 5.Life 6.Food 7.water 8.job 9.Car 10.communites I m part of
  3. zeke365

    Should we quit everything?

    I think you should look at this way technology is a tool and how we use it that makes addicted or not. There an old saying "You play the game, don't let the game play you." In other words, don't let tech control you, you control tech. You can't get rid of technology completely that's unrealistic and it's in our culture. The question is what do is distracting you the most, what taking most of your time. would you rather do other things? I ask these questions to myself all the time and if the one I really don't want to fast because I like it so much then that the one I fast the most because taking way my time, or detox from. Cause it about bettering yourself. One trick is you could do what I did is in sense called no social media so basically no reddit, youtube, or whatever you want to put in their then set time off only when you get on, for me its the weekends but during the week it none of them. Try this if you like cause helped me tremendously but start small maybe say you can't get social media past a certain time during the day and work your way up. Plus if you're just starting with the gaming detox focus on that first then add this in later if you must, you don't have to do everything at once, take it one step at a time. I hope this helps.
  4. zeke365

    Who’s playing in moderation?

    not everyone can play in moderation and that why we come here to commit to something better. Eventually, you find video games waste of time and want to do something more in your life. Here a quote I take to heart "Do you want to keep life on pause or press play on life." The decision is yours and yours alone. If you can play in moderation great but understand not everyone can.
  5. zeke365

    Gaming -> 1 On 1 Time With God

    welcome to the forums, Splitstep nice to see you, brother, even I have relapsed once last year so you are not alone, its what can we learn from these relapses to help us do better next time so it does not happen again. There quote I made last year and sticks with me to this very day and I think it might help you. "Do you want to keep life on pause or do you want to press play on life?" The answer is yours to choose but it helps me along the way.
  6. zeke365

    Zeke Journel Round 2

    Days 2-8 NO Tap detox Week 1 So how have things gone so far very well and glad I m doing this detox? Now here a couple of things I have accomplished this week is I got 4 videos done with my youtube ready and 2 of them are up as well did some human Japanese language learning, plus I went to singles groups and met someone I may help them find a place around here to have a place for disabled people. That another dream coming true, plus I will be attending escape the room on Feb. 23. I also started listening to a the faith-based audio series on Sunday Feb. 3 every night and have plenty of audio to last for the 180 days. You know something that I m at peace like a calmness to me different from my last detox, it's more like my old real self. The best way I can describe it is like having the color return to your eyes with even more depth like when I m was a child when I use to play outside and play games like tag, or power wheels. I m glad of it but today I noticed something, so I wanted to keep this channel called glove and boots cause their hilarious puppets and I subscribed because it did not work with the detox since I missed the first round. I did not want to miss the second round but as soon as subscribed I noticed this aggression in my body and the first thought came to mind is video game. As strange as that is so I unsubscribed again and yet I have a peace and calmness about me now. Plus I m listening to some faith-based music right now as we speak. Now I have not got have reading down yet but I will hopefully have that down this week. Plus in the detox, I do allow email and analytics of youtube spread out so I can answer comments quickly but outside of that I did not much other than the optimized one my videos. You may be wondering if I have used my new pc, yes but right now I want to figure how to transfer my software to the new pc then I can use it better, as of now I m using my old pc and I want the first video I make on the new pc to be faith-based so that why I m trying to finish these videos once that done and everything transferred then I can I start working on the new pc. Plus it answers another dream is to have a home theater so this pc I have will be hooked to my TV and I will be able to use it as 5.1 surrounds sound something I always wanted to to do just need shelves for that. The second thing I think I should mention is this will be by week by week basis and you may ask why this because of its so much easier on me because I don't get rush of the notification here as much and makes a focus on where I want to go. So I will allow myself this weekend to all social media including here but during the week will not. That it's it for today Grateful: 1.God 2.Bible 3.Church 4.family 5.House 6.Car 7.Job 8.Food 9.Water 10. Communities I m apart of.
  7. zeke365

    Zeke Journel Round 2

    Day 1 of NO Tap detox I came up with name for this detox cause I like having names to detox I do and helps keep me organized as well. The reason I called it that is because were always tapping our phones for something and just stuck. Plus I m keeping me quote "Do you want to live life on pause or do you want to press play on life." This quote has stuck with me and it something I can hang on to. So far so good, I read a little news and trying to do some reviews of some channels to help them out. Plus I m trying to transfer files to my new pc as well so I can complete projects and I walked around shopping area today as well bought ingredients to make new recipes so I m excited about that. That it for today have wonderful day. Grateful: 1.God 2.Bible 3.Church 4.Family 5.food 6.water 7.House 8.Job 9.Car 10.communites I m apart of
  8. zeke365

    Zeke Journel Round 2

    So today I bought gaming PC and before you say anything like how why do this or that let me explain. One the reason is because it had the CPU and GPU I wanted and wanted it last 5 years at least. Yes it tempting to do vr but I'm still gonna do the detox I promised starting tomorrow. I m gonna fight the urges to play or do anything expect my detox. Now why am I doing 2nd detox well simply because when I first quit gaming, retreated to anime and cartoons and soon realized it was unhealty and is not getting me where I want to so I decided this year I m going doing another detox that eliminates this. Plus 80% of my research is dedicated to anime and the other 20% things. So I wanted to clarify something when I say tech I mean anything to do with build PC, gaming PC (though mine is it is not fancy), jaytwocents, linus tech tips that kind of tech even tvs. Now say something goes wrong like if hdd dies, or gpu not working or something that preventing form doing my work then it would be allowed. There is one exception to the rule which is I am allowed to watch tutorials online like how to use facebook, reddit, thumblr, ect. or courses I m taking to make my youtube channel better. I'm excited for no anime, no gaming, no manga (expect faith based), no cartoons (expect faith based), reading books faith based, as well audio faith based though I will be be focusing on some review projects first that needs to be done but it setups tomorrow and no social media detox should return as well. This should not get give me more productivity time and find ways to think outside the box. Plus I m allowed to movies in movie theaters but just not at home expect faith based at home. I need some type of reward system I want to see if I resist my urges and use this pc as workstation pc for 180 days. That it for today. Grateful: 1.God 2.Church 3.Family 4.Job 5.Food 6.Water 7.House 8.Bible 9.life 10.communities I m apart of.
  9. zeke365

    Zeke Journel Round 2

    I wanted to clarify a few things on this new fast. First of all, I m gonna aim for 180 days not because 90s days is enough but I think I m more addicted than I thought and need to extend this so I can do other things. I will also be using the guide to help me get out of gaming a lot more as well. Now when I said faith-based stuff I mean Christian stuff and I wanted to say during the week I will be allowed to read a book or listen to the audiobook but on the weekends is when I can watch movies (expect Tuesday at movies better deal) that I have. This has to be what I own and not bought so I can stop being jealous of other people and never getting anywhere in my life but first I need to deal with the emotional baggage that been on my life for so long before I can move on. That what I have been doing and realizing what I need to deal with then I can feel freer. detox 1.NO ANIME/MANGA for 180 days (expect faith-based ones for a little while) (exceptions will be manga cookbook so I can learn some recipes) 2.Monday-Thursday NO social media detox which means no facebook,reddit, youtube, Tumblr, etc. 3. Allowed to read books (actual books not kindle) every night and I am allowed audio books every night 4. Friday, Sat, Sunday I am allowed to watch youtube, facebook, Reddit, Tumblr etc. 5.No Cartoons will be allowed to expect faith-based cartoons as well. 6.No VR or tech or gaming of any kind will be allowed even on my own projects. 7. All youtube will have to be faith-based in some sense 8. The exception to the rule is animation movies in the theater I m allowed. 9. Dance class wed. night at the gym, bible study every other Monday singles every Thursday. 10. Attend more social events when I can using Eventbrite, meetup, and my other group I m apart of. 11. I m allowed to watch live action like news and stuff but that's about the limit Sometimes you have to restrict yourself before you will ever try sometime new and that what I m trying to do restrict to change as strange as sounds cause if I m comfortable where I am at why would I change but if their restrictions on me then how can I learn something new. I wanted to say this starts February 1 and its Friday and what really funny about this is when I first did the gaming detox in 2017 it was on Friday so it tells me I m doing the right thing. My goals will be 1.return to learning human Japanese 2.Return to improving grammar skills 3.Improve script writing 4.keep making video content and being consistent. The reason for this fast is simple both anime and gaming is not taking me anywhere but jealousy that I won't become one of them or just escape itself and the reason I chose 180 days is that I know its bigger addiction than my last one. I would like to hear your thoughts on this goal plan and hopefully, I can do one thing to move my life forward. Have a wonderful day. GratefuL: 1.God 2.Church 3.Bible 4.family 5.Job 6.Car 7.House 8.Food 9.water 10.communities I m apart of
  10. zeke365

    Zeke Journel Round 2

    Now I wanted to let you know what my plans are. I won't be able to do a full cold turkey like I want to but I kind of can wean myself off it sort of like how I did video games it sort stop playing less and less but there will be some major changes you will see in a moment, but first reflection time. Reflection time: I don't write this just tell how bad I am or how good I am, I write these because I keep finding pieces to the puzzles that caused me to go in the direction I have and I have a better understanding of why now. You my parents (original) before my mom remarried use to fight a lot and it reflected on me a lot and in 2nd grade I remember a student showing me a pokemon card of white fox and I think this where the addiction began and so and found out a series launched called pokemon (remember this in the 90s) I watched on kids wb and really liked a lot and so after watching saturating morning cartoons I asked for games red, blue and yellow. I had all 3 and I spent hours in those games collecting these creatures and battling them, it was so bad that my grades slipped and my mom had to take it away from me, to this day I would NOT be able to play them because of it high addiction rate. So for 4 years I was in this why new kids moved on. I had disability to which caused me to learn a tad slower but if you talk to me you would not even know it. Pokemon one day I got link cables to hook to my Gameboy color so I could trade pokemon with friends in a social setting then got in trouble for that but in remember my mom telling me we were moving and that my parents would divorce though at 8 or 9 years old your not sure what going on. In 2003 I tried to play pokemon games again but just could not handle myself and I had Digimon cards and accessories to go along with them and was in pokemon tournament once then in 2003 I decided to burn everything so I would never endure that again, I saw a show called cow and chicken which lead me to more porn and other things. This because I believed the longest my parents would get back together and never really let go of that thought so I ended up making up an excuse that cartoons and anime were clean and refused to grow up without realizing I was growing up, I even got a Wii so I could socialize with other people that were the purpose of it. I dived deep in gaming but luckily avoided most shooters and had fun and online was still in infancy before social media and high speed in 2006 and I remember playing games on them and having blast but everyone else was into dating or sports which in general never got me interested in any games like that. before long I desired a social community and myst online on hp laptop then started doing movie production work which in general I m storyteller (writing that is). So I go into that using game called the movies software and created a few movies with a community in 2012 called TMuunderground which helped me out a lot and how to do these things and since then moved to muvizu software. As for Myst online, I was able to have family in which I could unleash my creativity on by doing in-game tours which were extremely popular and I tried other things as and ended up turning into the game biggest avtertisment person I was the go-to person for avertisment. in 2014 I decided to put away my console for good because I had custom built pc that allowed me to much more stuff it with and since then have upgraded the CPU and GPU the way I planned it. In 2015 I was able to handle mystonline and no console games really well and remember I was making movies when I was not an online game and you maybe wondering where the downfall came. Well in December of 2015 and 2013 I had created 2 steam accounts and I was not big fan of steam at the time and preferred to play my games alone and not online but I got and started to play or read i m not sure how you would categorize it visual novels which immersed me further than I had ever gone before and the first one was Narcissu and Tokyo school life and remember really like them but the obsession lasted till June 2016 where I had to stop purchasing them and continue doing what I was doing. It was not until I did finally tour in 2016/2017 which marked 5 original I had planned for for my online game that I realized the season had ended and its was getting harder and harder to do so in 2017 I came here to do my no gaming detox and I was ready. So I think I have been holding on to grudge against my parents for so long that its something I did not realize and last year going healing for one them and this Tuesday to get healing for another to hopefully break the cycle and would like to game again someday but have no attachments or escapism to it then again I may never be able to return to gaming. In 2005 is when youtube and mega video started coming into play I started to watching old cartoons and anime again mostly kid anime until D.N Angel, I like the visuals and story that continued on watching anime ever since and at times I would have to fast anime if I thought I was going into echii and hentai territory. I used to do a 3 way fast where if I fasted anime I had video games if I fasted video games I had anime and if I fasted internet I had video games. I think anime is another escapism I need to give up but for now, I not going full could turkey but I m placing some restrictions that need to be done. Plus to this day I still want to date anime character yes I m that deep even looking at ai tech and how that impleneted and that ven frighting so that why I need to do this fast and maybe get back to reality. I reflected on this because I realized I escaped all because at one point I wanted my parents back together and me coming to realization that I may never have relationship with one of them not from me but from that person point view and had shown it though to their actions. So with that said what are some restrictions I placing in feb. 1.No Cartoons will be allowed expect faith based cartoons 2.No anime at all expect faith based manga 3.No social media detox will return feb. 4 4.I am not allowed to buy anthing new, you may ask why well simply this to teach me to be contect with what I have not want more all the time and to complete what I have. 5.Expeections are movie theather animation like lego movie 2, wonder park, blue sky movies I m allowing myself to go the movie theather to get out of the house and not be at pc all the time. 6.I will only all the anime reviews projects allowed and once there done then no anime will start which I have 3 more to do. 7.I will be allowed to only watch or read faith based manga on the weekends and it will not be allowed durning the week so I have some sort of reward system. 8.Everything will have to be faith based to an extent with that be tv, or online as well. 9.Expection will be manga cookbook (since that where all the recpeices are) Now why faith based you may ask well one it helps encorurge me and its something I have been wanting to do for awhile to watch all my faith based movies and why I have not done before well simply I watch anime and refused to change it up and I m stubburn mule sometimes so that why, this should help reduce the manga and anime escampism by termedouts amouts and allow me to focus on my own works like my youtube channel. Like I said its not perfect but it be whole lot better than what I m currently doing and have thought about learning blender agaian and mmd type of thing but for the anime detox to work those will be help off blender not so much but mmd yes. I m not sure if I return to learning human japanese yet but I might add in as well my grammer skills. Its just a matter wheter I have time for it but I should. Plus I have some good news in Feb. I will be taking a dance class at my new gym on Wed. nights and Monday will be my normal workout then every other Monday I will have small bible study and on Sunda,y I m starting to go to churches and found singles group (with more my age) on Thursdays as well another event I can attend though another single group so I m excited about those as well. So there you have it my plan for feb. 2019 and I hope you all understand where I m coming from and I want to thank you fall reading have wonderful day. Grateful 1.God 2.Bible 3.Church 4.Family 5.Car 6.job 7.house 8.food 9.water 10.communities I m apart of
  11. zeke365

    Zeke Journel Round 2

    Time to reflect, I think I know what went wrong is one is tech and vr (though I like new pc that not gaming). So before hand I never deleted my gaming related accounts (I did not realized I had some of these till recently.) So this is something new I need to do and when I think about the first half of last year and the start of this year there a total change between the two. So I m gonna be redoing this fast again (guess takes a few tries before you get it right) but I m adding anime in the mix. Why anime you may ask well since gaming and anime are directly related they both need to go in this detox, that and anime is just another form of escapism for me. So that is something I will be doing something fairly soon. This includes manga as well. The second thing I realized is when I returned to gaming to support a game I started running away (not literally) but in the sense I went church because I wanted to escape my problem and addiction to my pc. Though I see positional for gaming, I have to realize that life behind me and I m trying to cope with that to. Plus I have watch too many gaming streams of vr and other stuff. Plus I have figured out how to make pc not gaming rig, why is so hard to find pc not for gaming but still what you want it to be? There two options I have here and one is getting prebuilt system but replace the gpu with workstation card and since workstation cards are not designed for gaming on the hardware this seems the best solution to the problem and I serious need to stop lying here and to myself for never doing what I said I was going to do. With that I m very sorry everyone for that and I have officially deleted discord, and twitch tv. I do not think I have any others than that but I m not even sure. So it kind of weird relapse all because I thought watching and helping game development would be fun. Well it does not move me forward it forces be back. Now I what I going to do well in Feb. 2019 I m restarting the detox again and this with more focus on what I say and do and some of you may say why wait, why not do it now? Well that because I have few anime reviews I need to wrap of this month for my YouTube channel so that my reasoning on that. so what's the goal plan well I will still have my no social media detox expect here as of right now and I will be allowing cartoons and what do I mean by cartoons shows like steven unveirse, start vs evil, tiny toon adventures, amazing world of gumball. Those are cartoons in the since I do not get overly obsessed with or want to escape with as much though it does make me jealous from time to time but not as bad as anime. Anime is another form of escapism that I allowed when I quit gaming the first time and now I need to give that up and maybe just maybe I can a better handle on myself. Feb. 1 is when I will be starting all of this. I hope you have good day, 2019 is about moving forward not backwards.
  12. zeke365


    I have an issue as of right now and I know about quitting all games in life and I should not do this but let me explain cause I kind feel guilty about doing this to them. So when I return to gaming and vr I knew of game called Virtual novel and started supporting them through pateron and my rational thinking is since its development I could help with the development in the game and see how game is being developed from the ground up. Its something I'm very interested in to but has not released yet but when when I thought about be worth it, I did the pledge then took the pledge away a month later thinking that not gonna take my life forward but now I feel guilty because I said I was pledge to them and then took away. I m not sure what to do but I m thinking of doing my pledge again because I do not like this guilt on me and since I was talking about features to add to their game. Tell your thoughts in the comments below.
  13. zeke365

    Zeke Journel Round 2

    Day 68 refection time: I thought I share some reflections I have been having and starting to realize where they came from. To help understand this is both of my parents are stubborn so I get it from both sides even my grandparents side to, with that said it makes me a bit stubborn at times as well. So without out of the way and the reason maybe I became an addict is somehow I shifted the blame to video games. Like I blamed them from my own problems and wanted them to fix it but not myself. When I was about 10 my parents had issues and divorced and then my mom remarried in 2005. I thought I was fine with this but in reality I hated myself for this and why I escaped with porn and gaming at the same time. Plus I thought all this time my parents would get together during this time. This seems to be the biggest root of the problem as I see it. So over the years that all I asked for is video games and how to immerse myself even further away from the main issue. So basically I did three things blame video games for my problems, each family member and each addiction is related to each one. So I m getting some help with this and lucky porn is not big issue anymore but looking at gaming addiction and the person it attached to. This why I thought videos games were evil like poison to me is because I did not want to admit my own problems and started to realize video games were not the main issue here its me. I m the one that caused this problem. I even went as far to say every video game is evil and I rather not touch it ever and the problem with this thinking is that the more I resisted the more it became in front of my face saying the game is not the problem its you. Now that I realize this what can I do about it you may ask? I have thought of a couple of things part of me wants to go back and the part said no so it sort like I m in the end game but but were both tide with the goal and frankly both directions look good if I use it right. The first option is making a visual novel about video game addiction. I even have a script back in 2006 that kind reflects this. The reason being is I would like to help people get out of video game addiction but from the inside. So having game visual novel about game addiction might help some might not whose knows buts its one of the possibles I m looking at doing. The basic story is the guy or gal has been shut in all their life and its about other characters trying to pull this guy or girl out their box to try something new. It would have multi endings in which would be neural path, bad bath, and good path. This way if any one wanted to find out more they could look up. Its not the best solution but its something I think would be helpful even if it makes them think for a moment. I sort of have love & hate relationship with visual novels because one it was my downfall and now I want to use it as tool then there are times I want to support game in development then I don't want to. I will say this I m starting to find meetups to go so social is another thing that I m doing. I think that about it today give your thoughts on the idea and if something good or something I should stay away from. Grateful: 1.God 2.Church 3.Bible 4.Family 5.House 6.Car 7.Life 8.Water 9.job 10.communities I m apart of.
  14. zeke365

    Zeke Journel Round 2

    Day 60 I decided to keep tmu site open one more year so I can complete on a promise then leave. One thing in 2019 is I will start budgeting and begin my Japanese diet as well. So that what I plan to do in 2019. Hope you have a good day. Grateful: 1.God 2.Church 3.Family 4.Bible 5.House 6.Money 7.Car 8.Job 9.Life 10.communities I m part of
  15. zeke365

    Zeke Journel Round 2

    Days 20-59 Hello everyone I m back and I just wanted to tell you some things I have learned and what I what I will be doing in the upcoming year. Lets just I say I can now live with this family member without regrets and have slowly realized that I need to to fix the other half with another family member. This will complete the cycle I hope. The second most important thing is I noticed a lot of the clothes I wear are to big on me and so starting in the new year I will be looking to get new clothes that fit but are snug. The third thing is I have my YouTube channel official a life long dream of mine called Animated Christians and I have 25 subscribers and if any of you are apart I want to thank you. The forth thing is I started watching game streams and channels again yes I know I probably should put myself in a better position. The main reason is not gaming in general but to buy new PC something that powerful enough to run animation and software without being to expensive and the ones I do want are gaming desktops sometimes I wish that word would disappear even if that not the intended purpose. So I m searching for that one to get off windows 7 to 10 and the second is to be able to use my oclus go to make 360 videos. I went back and forth between building and prebuilt and untimely went to prebuilt then I don't have worry about the hassle of anything though it does to take the experience way I don't think I can handle bios, memory, etc. unless you think I should purse that. I think there one more website I may have to let go of call TMUnderground which is website where I learned about animation based on the game I had at the time and those people had some creative ideas but I have noticed the community not as active and me not being there as often, I thought about giving up this year to start a fresh but I would rather send them on happy note than sad one. Then once its done I will say my farewell, I think that better than just saying goodbye as is. Let me know your thoughts on this. I also know a mistake at the beginning of the the year which is when the bible experience my faith based audio ended I ended up drifting away so in order for that not to happen again I will continue doing that next year but don't stop till have all the audios finished. Not sure what it is but that what kept me away from gaming the longest plus my no media detox that seem to be off and on of late. So what are some the goals of 2019 well for 2019 I m stating "Moving Forward" where 2018 "New Beginning" I don't even know how I come up with these but 2019 is about moving forward with my life in completely new direction. The first goal is to be healed from another family member, Next is to do some winter cleaning and get rid of all by to big shirts and pants and find something that snug and fits together much better, next is to fix my eating habits and practice edict. Now I went off keto because it was not enough variety for me so at the beginning of this year I will be going on the Japanese diet based on the cookbooks. It serves 2 purposes one to be healthy second gives me opportunity to learn to cook. As for my no media detox I will be restarting it January 1. No media detox is basically no social platform ever expect email and maybe my YouTube analytics so I comment on videos but that about it, no Facebook, reedit, YouTube, etc. Do to YouTube taking most of my time some things have been left on the back burner so I think what I do I choose will do Jansen as well cook out of the book.. few other things have crossed my mind but it to much of trigger for me to do is make visual novel to tell stories which takes 2 mediums I like anime and storytelling and putting them together. Last This should what should look like Monday: Cooking/Human Japanese Tuesday: Recording (takes good day)/exercise Wed: animated and export Thursday: Editing/exercise Friday: free day release video Saturday: free day Sunday: Scripts/grammar girl This will be my new plan going forward and I will try to stick with it and keep listening to faith based audios until I finsh them all. That its for today have wonderful day happy new year. Grateful: 1.God 2.Church 3.Family 4.Life 5.Car 6.money 7.house 8.job 9.communities I m part of 10. bible