Amphibian220

Welcome to game quitters! Are you doing the respawn workbook? I hope you will experience the necessary tool of self-accountability. Self accountability enables us to see ourselves from a third person perspective and see the real emotions and thinking patterns behind our failures. From reading one of Cam Adair’s logs, video game addiction is rarely a problem without underlying issues that you have to tackle. So usually the gamer wants to turn back to games when he does not know how to tackle a particular issue. This is no simple task at hand but it will empower you to achieve many great goals in your life. One small tip from experience: when you have a pocket of free time, do a good thing no matter how small. This small deed can stop you from going back to old ways. It can be grooming, exercise etc.

Julon, good to have this frank answer. What is hampering you from seeing the big goal? Who are you by experience and education. What could you produce during lifetime to be of value 100 years after, 1000 years after. Research this question more. individual goals aren’t serious. Any meaningful goal is supra individual. Just taking care of your body’s wants won’t fire you up with energy. Ultimately, you want to get into a real struggle to achieve something sublime and stun the cynics. You want to be young and fearless, if you grow old in this state it will be too late to be young. Believe this, the biggest betrayal of young people today is they don’t aspire to dream and be great.

Welcome Julon! Why didn’t you write at the first instance of desire to play games? You have identified an important stumbling block- lack of discipline. Can you say if you were living by daily plans and what they were like? Were they realistic and practical taking into account your different needs and goals? Were they ambiguous and uninspiring causing you to question the wisdom of following them? Can you write in a way that is convenient to you what sort of issue caused you to lose fighting morale and go back to playing games?

You are at 24 days, if you feel confident to stop here, then I advise to keep a private diary my friend. Diaries are kept for different reasons, but I suggest using it as a self accountability tool that enables you to track emotions, goals achievement, health, skills development etc. I keep and update a private diary nearly every day and it helps me a lot.

Mohammad, The embarrassment of playing a game messes with you mentally from your posts, and this is no good. You are not starting over your detox, don’t say that. If you could see it clearly, you are progressing in your detox. Every failure is information. If you collect the information and make conclusions, every next step you get a qualitative improvement. If you ignore the information, you will keep repeating the mistake until you pay attention to the information. Take it differently: the game gives you a quick enjoyment because you can forget issues, have a nice challenge, see your character develop etc. You may admire the game for another reason. I want you to try to remember your emotions and thoughts before you get the pull to play because that is often the key to recovery. You can then find and match a strategy that replaces gaming and is healthy. Whenever I want to have a quick battle, that is in real sports now. I can’t get out to a gym at any moment, but I can shadow box at ANY moment!

C-tail, I think both poker and wine are no good because they have scope for controlling you just as gaming does. After gaming has compromised the ability to control yourself, its better to stay away from similar things. As subtle as it may sound, try looking for a light cardio activity (the respawn workbook has suggestions on non-addictive activities if you are on it). I currently am doing back stretching exercises that are at the same time good for blood circulation and concentration throughout the day. There is also an element of challenge to them. I know you walk each day, but I suggest something that is more engaging. Walking will not work many of your muscles. All the best. edit: atomic habits by james clear is a good book

Forex huh? My friend developed an addiction to it and lost a lot of his savings on it. There are some historical correlations between currencies like the dollar and the euro (they are in one boat as he says) and this along with following economic news allows to set up a strategy. Sometimes a political event makes a fall in a currency highly likely to happen and people buy into this. Is it likely that given your study field (humanities) you will get more insight in risk and prediction psychology or is this forex a more technical/math work? About your shoulder, did you ever injure it before? I think that heavy injuries can resurface if the exercise is physically straining.

I keep a private diary for self assessment now,I am tracking like 5 journals atm to be a moral inspiration and give tips. There is only one issue, real insights and tips require a good deal of tracking.

You walked 52 km in 3 days? What a heart. I cannot walk long distances at the moment but perform back strengthening exercises. Are you completing the respawn workbook at the moment? With regards to the laptop, I would go to my library, print out learning materials and work with that. It increased productivity greatly by removing all distractions. Another thing i can recommend is getting one of those reading tablets that are text only and allow you to upload, store and read documents.

Welcome to the forum C-tail. Hope you will experience a great come back by starting this thread. You have to fix your sleeping pattern to make it easier on yourself. Multi-prong approach: replace activities that keep you awake at night ( accept it that there are no screens from evening, the sooner you do, the sooner your sleeping and health recover) with more relaxing activities, set your alarm clock near the time you go to sleep. The setting of an alarm clock convinces you to go to sleep. Another quick tip: fill your day with activities that serve your different needs, dont put too much pressure on yourself in one thing and this will help you in recovery. When i filled my entire day with study work I was breaking my schedule because it was not sustainable. Now I’ve got things like grooming, exercise, reading books (physical books, not internet) I enjoy, going out and this is sustainable. Even washing my clothes is fun. Good luck on this journey. Edit: Oh and one more thing: most members underestimate what an active approach is needed for recovery. Don’t trust your autopilot but keep inviting new healthy activities into your life that mess with your old thinking and old habits. I kept seeing relapses in myself and others because “ I seem to be doing ok, may as well stop tracking myself in a diary and stop being accountable.” One month later they are back to old habits. Continue active tracking even when your going is good.

RB1, how are you doing? Can you break down how your days are going right now and what your principal interests are? How much time do you spend on fitness? How much time on resting and socializing? Are you better able to handle the learning because of how you changed your lifestyle?

Illi, is there a certain time for you when the obsessive thinking spikes? Like When you have a good conversation with someone, or complete a task, do you get some euphoric feeling and a strong pull for obsessive thinking?

Man you should see your GP and do a blood test. Hope you get better soon. With regards to relaxation, i can say that listening to the sounds of the ocean, seagulls and whales works very well.

Ikar , interesting that you track number of hours per week that you invest in activities. Should try this myseld. how do you create pressure to do more? Does it happen from certain deadlines, written daily plans or another source of inspiration?

Welcome to the forum. May this post change your life for the better. It is good that you are beginning to look after yourself by taking care of the diet. The more you look after yourself, the more self esteem and confidence you will gain. Can you share more about yourself, what are you studying and what field do you want to work in? Don’t limit the answer to these points I listed, you can describe things that you see as important in yourself and the things that you need to change.

Welcome to the forum Peter. You are not the first person on the forum to have cut the mouse cord. Looks like a tradition is forming here on GQ. I can say that I intentionally lived without a computer for some time and made use of library computers when I felt the pull of video games. Also, you mention an interesting part of human nature. People will delay important things when they are under an illusion that there will be enough time later on. If you can look a bit more holistically at your way of life and character traits, you can see brilliant ways for breaking the failure cycle. The failure cycle consists of highs (thats when it appears that things are going ok) and the lows when you get the important feedback. Repeat enough times that “this day is important not to waste because you are tight on time to achieve greater aims” and it works wonders. If your mind responds with skepticism, always re-evaluate and respond back. If you keep doing the same things and follow the same behavioural patterns as when you were failing, there is no reason that success will come on its own. Good luck with recovery. edit: you can watch one vlog of Cam Adair per day and pause the video to take notes in your workbook. This activity starts to actually create new thinking patterns which is the blueprint for change.

Daniel, i can see quite a bit of emotion and animosity towards games in your post. I’d say whereas in the beginning it can help yo quit, it is not a good direction to go in because regretting and being annoyed actually tires you out. It can make you lose your focus. You made this decision, but one thing that I have a strong instinctive belief about is : Cool, resolute and steadfast achieves goals and moves mountains, but emotional and angry cannot last long. One of the best ways of following through on something is having a cool mind and focused approach with what you want to achieve. I hope I don’t come off as too patronizing, its just that when I had the anger and regret it was hard to get far in my goals.

@Illi There is an important realization in your post. I waited a year on this forum to read it. You have expressed it clearly and concisely: obsessive nature. How can this be fought? I am almost settled on writing something on the wall of my bedroom “Don't dare dream about changing the world before you are finished with your daily tasks”

Daniel, you have said you are studying literature. Is it in your plans to become a teacher? What field do you want to work in after you graduate? After I stopped gaming, I also stopped all non-essential internet use. I am afraid that new things like film series can become an addiction. The great thing about sports and speaking to family and friends is that these activities have much less scope for controlling you. I like sport, but I will not say it is interfering with my development.

@Ikar what are the “russian twists”? Sounds like something reckless- Americans routinely add the “russian” to things that are dangerous to do. Thing on emotions getting in the way: the more good you are, the less things you care about (you only start caring about the important things). The less disciplined you are, the more likely you are going to get distracted by little things and get overwhelmed emotionally. I heard this on Jocko willink’s podcast. It made me less attentive to how I do things, simple plan well executed is better than a very complicated daily plan with too many activities.

You are suffering from abstinence Daniel? so if you are not a gamer, then who do you think you are? When I decided I am an amateur boxer, started living the dream, I gradually stopped having an abstinence problem. You see, my mind goes “Go train! Become fit!” and I don’t have a problem with this desire.

I completed my masters degree in Law some years ago. I’m currently looking for a legal job in the construction business. why did I decide to quit video games? Video games were distracting me from important issues, such as health, education, work, development of communication skills. They never appeared to me as the source obstacle, I preferred to think that my issues were unmanageable and games had nothing to do with them. After some reflection I started seeing that they are causing serious discipline problems. I’m currently doing general cardio workouts and intend to start my boxing training.

I watched a chess boxing fight once. One of my friends mentioned that boxing and chess have similarities in strategy. I think that is why they combined them, in a way like biathlon. The most encouraging thing from your posts is that you started feeling better after working on your technique in boxing. Boxing is so intense that it makes you clever.

Going for a walk is a great way to free your mind! Are you playing or training in any sport? Also, are you studying at a university?

you alright? How long since you put your hockey gear on and imagined playing a real match as you skate about and take shots against a wall?