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About JSmith

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  1. Its okay. You can always try again when you're ready. Is there anything positive you can do today, for just five minutes even?
  2. I think it's because when you start something, you don't see any results for a long time. In today's world, patience is extremely difficult to cultivate. I was actually thinking about this earlier. Imagine how insane life would be if you did something once, and your body immediately reacted as if you had done that thing every day for twenty years. Smoke a cigarette, drop dead. Eat a cheeseburger, gain 100 pounds. Eat a carrot, turn into Mr. Clean. That would be a lot more obvious, and easier. But life ain't that way. Good or bad, change takes time. And our memories play hell with us, which doe
  3. Dopamine Detox: Day 8 I must be a masochist. Seriously dude, you can stop anytime you want now. You've more than doubled your initial target. I don't know, though. The more time I spend actually thinking about my real life problems, the more I realize how complacent I've been. I may feel extremely guilty, regressing back to old habits, even if they are greatly diminished. It feels as if any second I spend in blissful leisure is a second I could spend actually making things better. Even if the majority of that time is thinking about what the hell to do next, which so far has been the
  4. It's all dopamine in the end, tricky little hormone in our technology filled world.
  5. I don't even LISTEN to that song!
  6. @Bird By BirdIt's not THAT bad. Maybe a nasty case of earworm, did a little research of my own. I'll bring it up with my counselor on Monday if it keeps bugging me. The most bizarre thing is it's not just one song, it's like five or ten. One goes away and another takes its place. I was able to find some quiet while writing. Dopamine Detox: Day 7 Took a ridiculously long time to fall asleep. Probably the worst night yet. I think the eyemask helped a little, but man. Pretty girl wasn't at the gym today. Oh well. Still bouncing on heads and pins trying to figure out my living situation.
  7. Are you a therapist? Which country are you referring to?
  8. Dopamine Detox: Day 6 Weird day. Woke up around the same time as the last few days. Hit the gym again. Cute girl there, seen her twice now. Wish I could talk to her or something, but I feel like that's too obvious, at the gym. Spent last night, and this whole morning/afternoon, obsessing over finances and investments. I've been building this spreadsheet over the last year or so, trying to figure out how I'm gonna handle my money. Turbocharged the thing after spending some time on the FIRE subreddit. I think re-reading The Slight Edge kinda set me off here. All these years, I could have be
  9. Well my daydreaming can certainly get "lengthy", by that definition. But it's never felt like "interference", not like gaming for example. Just something I did a lot. Okay, except for maybe when I'm trying to sleep. But that's a whole different struggle for me. I've certainly experienced spikes in other escapism-related activities after quitting gaming, which makes sense to me, because they're essentially the same kind of activity. Keeping you away from real life issues. No doubt if I was gaming I would probably daydream less, but again is there really a difference?
  10. I consider myself a solid daydreamer, but never thought of it as a disorder...at what point does daydreaming become maladaptive? The symptoms I read on healthline are extremely general ("lengthy periods" = many minutes to hours???). I engaged in quite a heavy bit of roleplaying in the past, that I could say for sure was a clear issue. But now I work on novels so that part of me is channeled to something more constructive, I guess. *shrug*
  11. FIRE is great. I was just reading through it and running some numbers today and last night. I’m gonna start investing ASAP. It’s free money!
  12. I feel you, on the rage and the relationships. Lotta noise, not so much signal.
  13. Dopamine Detox: Day 5 Another quick workout in the morning, before breakfast. Felt good to just get some cardio in without trying to push myself too hard. I don't want to be too hard on myself anymore, I'm slowly learning how far simple consistency can take me. Class registration was today. I decided this is it. Gonna take 4 CS courses next semester, hopefully get an internship during the summer I can do for credit, and I'm done. Don't want to spend another year here, May sounds much better. It won't be easy, but hopefully taking steps like this detox will help get me in the right mi
  14. Same. I don't even bother making daily schedules, they never work out.
  15. Dopamine Detox: Day 4 Did tackle that homework, got it all done today, which feels nice. Once I started, I was simply in it, so that's a good thing. I'm wondering if it's better to write in the morning instead of at night. In the past I've found that writing late keeps my brain going, which my counselor also told me was a risk. I slept decently well last night though. Maybe I'll do a short morning and evening post. I don't know yet. I have so much time, it's crazy. I finished working by around 8:30. My "normal" bedtime is 1am. Been feeling a little bored the last couple hours. Did so