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Some Yahoo

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About Some Yahoo

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  • Birthday 07/08/1961

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  1. Try audiobooks, or podcasts. If you're up to it, I know a lady who is into gardening, woodworking, and restoring furniture. Even reading a real-live paper book is better. I have at least 3 good-ish books on my Kindle in my phone. There's nothing like putting on my headphones and listening to a book while doing chores. I even have bluetooth headphones I can use when walking. Hope this helps.
  2. So, one aspect of my addiction was that I always wanted to express some for of creativity in my life. But since I have a short attention span and react very negatively to frustration, I never developed the skills to do anything well. What this means is that I have a long list of hobbies that I absolutely suck at. Here it is: Writing Short Stories Photography Drawing 3D Art 3D Animation Painting Playing Bass Guitar Political Blogging (don't ask) Video Game Design and Programming But each of these endeavors take practice and patience. Meaning you're not going to create Alita: Battle Angel or even Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow in your first week of learning animation. So, as a gamer I would frequently say "Eff this, I'm playing Tera" (or SWTOR, or whatever). So you know what's harder than learning Blender? Opening Blender, rage-quitting after 45 minutes, and not looking at it again for 6 weeks. But here's the thing. I learned programming by having to get things done. I originally went to school for Electronics Engineering, not programming: I was forced into programming because the company I worked at needed some work done. Please note that this was in the 1980's BEFORE there were 10,000 IT graduates per year. So last month, I saw this video. ...and I decided to post one piece of art every day. Not massive projects, just quickies. And I expect that over time, maybe in a couple years I might stop sucking. So I made this site: http://snippets.209software.com/ I am only a few weeks in so far, and have not missed a day yet. I also found that pencil sketches are easier for me (I am NOT saying i'm any good) than 3D art, even using downloaded HDRI backdrops and prefab DAZ characters. The thing is YOU CAN DO THIS TOO. Maybe your thing isn't visual art. Maybe it's writing, or taking online classes. The thing is, DO something important! DON'T Substitute YouTube or porn or Netflix for gaming. Those things are mostly fine, but they are just another form of wasting time.
  3. It might be easier if you said how old your friend is. I quit gaming because it was impacting my ability to get my job done. No job, no income. I also started seeing a counselor to deal with depression because I got laid off after working at a company for 9 years. If your friend is 12, and has no responsibilities then it's fine to just try and coax him out of the house now and then. If he's 16 and flunking high school then you probably want to talk to him. If he's working, or married, and people are depending on him then there is more at stake. I know it's tough to bare your soul and have no one respond, but you were a bit vague about the details.
  4. Well as a 58 year old gamer, I feel for ya. It's not that games aren't fun, it's just what the addiction turns you into. Here are some examples of the bonuses you get without gaming in your life. When everyone is standing around the coffee machine on Monday, and everyone is talking about how much fun they had, you will have an actual story from the real world instead of a story about being a busty, half-naked elf priestess and teabagging a douchebag you've been trying to beat for 6 months. That novel you always wanted to write is actually making progress. You have actually taken the time to read a book. You begin to iron out your social awkwardness by living, laughing, and making mistakes. Stuff that needed painting and repairing is being painted and repaired. You actually feel free to volunteer for a little overtime now and then. You don't look at your wife/girlfriend/parents and hope they have some event where they need to be out of the house until late at night so you can be alone. You actually began drinking water and taking walks. You look back at your day while you're brushing your teeth at night and feel happy that you got some stuff done rather than spending 16 hours on a game. You find yourself becoming hopeful about your future. You find the will to take classes or sit down and figure stuff out. You notice that you're actually wearing shoes everyday (because you're going places). Your dog loves you more, and gets excited to see you. Severely reduced nagging in your day. Well I know that's a long list, but it's all from my own life. I'm sure there are lots more benefits. Cheers.
  5. That's great! Also it seems that the messed-up sleep and willpower thing is real. Lots of people do better when they aren't up gaming until 4 hours before they have to be at work or school.
  6. Welcome. I'm sure you'll find lots of ideas here to help you out. I know I did.
  7. I can imagine this swinging either way. I was MMOs. But the main thing is that while you're gaming, you're being constantly rewarded, and there are no consequences for the choices that you make that last past your next respawn. Gaming is primarily a way of checking out of real life for a while, like reading, partying, drug use, etc. MMOs promise "friendship" and "companionship", but in reality deliver neither. Single player - well I wasn't into that, but it's just a diversion. When played responsibly, it's not a problem. For us on this site, it dominates our lives and consumes all our time so that we end up in our 40's and we have no more real life.
  8. I love this video. Insead of gaming, commit yourself to do SOMETHING useful every day. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ul9jrCXhR4
  9. For some reason, as I was growing up I came to associate the word work with "stuff you have to do even though it's not fun and you hate doing it". Do your homework Do the yard work Go work out The thing is - and this is vitally important - what you do most of in life, and what you'll derive the most meaning from is most likely going to be attached to the word work. When I was in high school, they still taught photography - with the chemicals and everything. I loved it because none of it was sitting in the classroom reading a book and writing answers on paper. After I graduated, I spent many weekends with friends finding places to shoot some photos. And I had a blast. Then I got a job to shoot photos of a local business so they could set up a booth at the county fair. At first I attacked the project eagerly but over time I started to think of it as work rather than fun, and over the next two months, I squandered all my time and ended up rushing to get the project done in time for the fair. The thing is - the owner was my best friends older brother, and had he asked me to do it as a favor, and not offered to pay me, I would have finished in 3 days! Just attaching the word work to it made it a drudgery to me - a thing I had to do, rather than a thing I wanted to do. I guess I have always hated being told what to do. One thing I have learned as I got older is that our work defines us, and the work we do in this world is what we leave behind long after we're gone. In some ways our life's work is the most important thing we'll spend time on in our entire lives. As part of re-imagining myself after gaming, I have been trying to teach myself to love the word work. To look upon it as a kind of monument to myself and justification for all the food I have consumed and air I have breathed (that more worthy people might have used). Most of us have trouble feeling like we deserve a monument to our lives - I certainly don't feel like I do - but why not? At least we can try to become our best self, strive toward our unreachable ideal. But isn't is futile to strive - to expend limited energies and time toward the unreachable? Yes, but listen. LISTEN. YOU WILL NEVER REACH PERFECT, BUT YOU'LL END UP SOMEPLACE BETTER. You'll leave behind this place of mired in mediocrity, and push the overloaded barge that is your life in a direction of someplace better. Slightly better at first, perhaps infinitesimally, unnoticeably better, and you'll have setbacks, but you can't push in a positive direction without making some progress. Any progress. Bottom line: don't fear work. No great restaurant owner has never washed dishes or bussed tables. No great author started out great at spelling and grammar, or didn't write cheesy fan fiction. No great comic never crashed and burned in front of an audience. So get out there, suck at something until you master it. Suck at relationships until you don't. Suck at writing until you finish that novel. Be you. You is here for a reason. The universe spent aeons making a you. You have potential. Just use it.
  10. I know this goes against every instinct as a man, but I actually got myself a counselor. Someone not in my family, church, or work that basically listens. I can't say it's revolutionized my life, but sometimes just hearing myself say the idiocy I am engaged in helps me. I advise against Psychotherapy, my opinion of them is that they're drug pushers. My mental state should not come from a bottle. That's just my opinion. It sounds to me like you have depression going on, but ask a professional. I found a local counselor on the Psychology Today web site. Barring that, you can spill here.
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