Sarma 124 Posted August 15, 2019 Author Share Posted August 15, 2019 Day 50 - First kickbox training, psychiatrist meeting and sex drive Yesterday I went to my first day of kickboxing. I'm so proud of myself! I barely managed to get myself to go, but when I got there it was a lot easier. It was great. I learned some of the basics and I got some good exercise in. I met some new people, and yeah overall quite happy. As expected my cravings have reduced ever since I slept more and had some exercise. Although, my sex drive has been pretty high. I've been watching porn the past couple of days, not jerking off, just watching. I ain't getting any sex, so I just want to watch so I get fired up. Like literally every girl that's decently good looking I want to have sex with. Obviosly this should be a positive. What's also good, is that I don't want purely sex. I actually want to get to know the girl before anything happens. It's really exciting. I'm more confident around women, I want to be around people more and just overall feel like a fucking human, you know? Tonight, I'm going out with friends to this festival called Beer Fest. Maybe some of you know what it is. Anyways, I want to meet some new women there. Need to work on my conversations, because it ain't that good. The goal is just to get some interesting conversations with women. There's also this girl from my friend group I want to know better. She isn't coming tonight, but she will tomorrow. I'm gonna work on her a bit, see how it goes. I finally saw my psychiatrist. We didn't have any deep talk. She basically got to know me better. What I did find out though is that I'm not sick. YAY ! She also said there's no need to do a physical evaluation for any underlying problems. SO YAY! I'm gonna go see her again next week. She figured we should talk about my difficulties connecting with people and my transition to adult hood. I guess my problems aren't no where near what I thought they were. I have a hard time fitting in and finding myself, that's basically what she's saying. I'M SO RELIEVED. I feel 10 times lighter. Life is fucking scary, but also good at the same time. There's no stopping now, I'm healthy and that's all that matters. I will go atleast a few more times to my psychiatrist and over time we will work on my issues. I will ultimately become the man I should be. HAVE A WONDERFUL DAY . 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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