My story and idea on how to quit gaming

[RS Addict]

Hello everyone, I'm a guy who is addicted to gaming, in particular Oldschool Runescape and formerly League of Legends. I played Runescape as a kid and then my parents didn't let me play anything during high school so that I could get good grades and place into a competitive university. Of course when I got into said university, I immediately started playing games nonstop.

This addiction has lead me to the brink of being kicked out of university because when I play that game I get super addicted and play for 10+ hours a day. I miss homework or do the bare minimum to scrape by and get destroyed on exams. I lie to my parents about what I'm actually doing until I get caught. My gaming addiction has left me two years behind on my degree so I really need to hurry up and graduate.

The reason why I'm posting this is my parents don't believe I will stop gaming or that I think gaming is a real problem to me. They really don't trust what I say anymore because I've lied to them many times about what I have been doing due to gaming addiction. I have a real problem where when I'm away from their control, I play games incessantly. They think when/if I return to college, I will play.

My first year of college, I had to drop out of a class because I missed 3 days of class because I was staying up too late playing games. My second year of college, they pulled me out because i lied to them about my grades. Since then, I've been studying at home and at school on and off for two years and my grades last year were completely terrible. I got put on academic probation. They finally caught me this summer and only recently they have told me I have gaming addiction (I agree). I stayed home for the past 3 months and the summer because they did not want to send me to play games.

They recently went on vacation and I recovered my Runescape account and played all day while they were away. I've lied countless times to my parents about how I spend my time. They do not trust me at all. They think that I'm lying right now just so that they will send me back to school so that I can play games. They showed me Cam Adair's videos about quitting games and since all of this has come from them they don't think I want to quit or will quit. Clearly, gaming is a huge problem for me, so I'm trying to come up with ideas on how to eliminate gaming from my life. Even writing this was hard and I did not include many of the details in the original post but my dad made me put them in.

In the recent past, I was living in conditions that did not really let me play Runescape at home. Basically I was living in someone's living room for a quarter, the internet was bad, and my dad was watching my computer using remote access tools. He also planned my schedule and made sure I followed it. I actually achieved decent grades because I didn't play any video games for 3 months.

I'm planning on returning to school this quarter(soon) and I was thinking about living in my car on campus. Some advantages I can see from living in a car are:

1. I'm less inclined to skip classes or stay in my car in the parking lot all day because its just uncomfortable.
2. I have no place to game once I come home. I stay at the library until I'm done with my days work and then come home(car) and sleep.
3. I can take showers and do laundry at school and I will have a parking permit so I can legally park overnight. The car is a minivan, not a sedan. I live in Southern California so the climate is pretty good.

What do you guys think about using car living as a way to eliminate game playing? Any other thoughts about my situation are also appreciated.

[Mads]

46 minutes ago, RS Addict said:

What do you guys think about using car living as a way to eliminate game playing? Any other thoughts about my situation are also appreciated.

Hey man,

Good on you for actively dealing with your problems. First I'll give you my thoughts on your situation and your relationship with your parents.

Your relationship with your parents come off to me as being very unhealthy in many ways. In my opinion your parents made a huge mistake when they completely prohibited you from playing video games. In high school you were no longer child but nor were you yet a man. You were starting to become an adult, and thus should be allowed to have an influence on how you spend your time. The way that your parents handled you playing video games was a surefire way to make you an addict once you finally got to make your own decisions - you never got the chance to learn to take the right ones. My point here being that you shouldn't be too harsh on yourself but instead try to remember that it's not only your fault. You lying to your parents is no good either of course since it just breeds distrust, and this is why they're reacting like they are atm.

I think this is a problem that you need to handle without your parents, but also you should try to improve your mutual trust in each other. You need to prove to them that you can handle university, and that will take some time. 

As far as living in a car goes:

If you think it'll work for you, then why not. I hope you're not planning to live in a car for the rest of your life, which means that eventually you will have to be able to stay in a normal home while having a healthy relationship to gaming. Though this is something that you can work on later if you think the car solution is what you need right now. I've seen someone write here on the forum, that they don't have a computer at home and instead do all their work at libraries / on campus. This could also be a solution to your problem, and will make your living conditions much more comfortable. Living an uncomfortable life in order to make sure you don't game might be a necessity for you, but personally I think I'd go for the  "normal home, no computer" solution.

Patience is a virtue and you're in it for the long haul. Remember to be forgiveful of yourself, and always try your best. Try to never lie to your parents again, even if that means you have to admit failure. If you feel the need to lie to your parents, make sure you have really good reasons.

I wish you the best of luck!

 

Kind regards,

Mads

[BooksandTrees]

Hi,

I think you should read my gaming addiction story.  I was addicted to RuneScape and Old School RuneScape for over 14 years and quit finally.  I was a clan leader and everything.

Gaming addiction story

[Samon]

Hey,

 

good to see you here. I played osrs and lol too very hard. Especially League was a problem, osrs is too slow pacing for me, but I still saw/see it as a problem. However I quit now. And i am glad you do too.

Maybe your parents made some mistakes, but I think they are great because they help you so much to get out of this! They love you for sure, even if they dont trust you currently...

The whole car idea can work, but I am not sure really. If you want to game you will do it. You need to build up a daily routine, alternstive hobbies etc. so you dont game again. Use your time by your parents do find new hobbys, so you get a good detox done, before you go back to school. 

You should definetely make a daily journal. Write there every day, it helps. Read other people journals, that helps too!

wish you the best!

[RS Addict]

On 12/21/2018 at 7:56 PM, Mads said:

Hey man,

Good on you for actively dealing with your problems. First I'll give you my thoughts on your situation and your relationship with your parents.

Your relationship with your parents come off to me as being very unhealthy in many ways. In my opinion your parents made a huge mistake when they completely prohibited you from playing video games. In high school you were no longer child but nor were you yet a man. You were starting to become an adult, and thus should be allowed to have an influence on how you spend your time. The way that your parents handled you playing video games was a surefire way to make you an addict once you finally got to make your own decisions - you never got the chance to learn to take the right ones. My point here being that you shouldn't be too harsh on yourself but instead try to remember that it's not only your fault. You lying to your parents is no good either of course since it just breeds distrust, and this is why they're reacting like they are atm.

I think this is a problem that you need to handle without your parents, but also you should try to improve your mutual trust in each other. You need to prove to them that you can handle university, and that will take some time. 

As far as living in a car goes:

If you think it'll work for you, then why not. I hope you're not planning to live in a car for the rest of your life, which means that eventually you will have to be able to stay in a normal home while having a healthy relationship to gaming. Though this is something that you can work on later if you think the car solution is what you need right now. I've seen someone write here on the forum, that they don't have a computer at home and instead do all their work at libraries / on campus. This could also be a solution to your problem, and will make your living conditions much more comfortable. Living an uncomfortable life in order to make sure you don't game might be a necessity for you, but personally I think I'd go for the  "normal home, no computer" solution.

Patience is a virtue and you're in it for the long haul. Remember to be forgiveful of yourself, and always try your best. Try to never lie to your parents again, even if that means you have to admit failure. If you feel the need to lie to your parents, make sure you have really good reasons.

I wish you the best of luck!

 

Kind regards,

Mads

Thanks for your input Mads. I think living in a car is not a good idea because even though university campus is relatively safe, the hassle of moving the car and the fear of being mugged may negatively impact my studies.

23 hours ago, Matt S said:

Hi,

I think you should read my gaming addiction story.  I was addicted to RuneScape and Old School RuneScape for over 14 years and quit finally.  I was a clan leader and everything.

Gaming addiction story

Thanks Matt, read every word. I clanned too and its really intoxicating being around people all doing the same thing and running around rev caves or deep wild. Need to quit too.

20 hours ago, Samon said:

Hey,

 

good to see you here. I played osrs and lol too very hard. Especially League was a problem, osrs is too slow pacing for me, but I still saw/see it as a problem. However I quit now. And i am glad you do too.

Maybe your parents made some mistakes, but I think they are great because they help you so much to get out of this! They love you for sure, even if they dont trust you currently...

The whole car idea can work, but I am not sure really. If you want to game you will do it. You need to build up a daily routine, alternstive hobbies etc. so you dont game again. Use your time by your parents do find new hobbys, so you get a good detox done, before you go back to school. 

You should definetely make a daily journal. Write there every day, it helps. Read other people journals, that helps too!

wish you the best!

Hey man, thanks for reading. I posted a journal that I'm going to keep as I return to school.

[Cam Adair]

Welcome. There have been many in a similar position to you. @Moe Smith's journal would be good to read - he was put on academic probation before quitting gaming and turning things around.