Ello you cunts

[Schwing]

Hi guys. My name is Matthew, I'm 16, I'm from England and I have pretty much no life. I've been wanting to quit games for quite some time now and stumbling across this site and cam's work had me wipe my entire steam library. It wasn't easy but I'm convinced this change is for the better. I quit watching porn a few weeks before that too.

I've always been drawn to videogames subconsciously I think. I had always been shy and not very outgoing yet very imaginative and diligent. Videogames instantly appealed to me. All I needed was on a screen in my bedroom. As I've been getting into games more and more I found I enjoyed my other hobbies less and less. I quit kayaking, I quit climbing, I quit martial arts, I quit playing cello and trumpet. Suddenly my hobbies (if I had even kept them still) had become mere decorations just to make myself appear accomplished. I have always been a dreamer- I want to be an engineer when I'm older and I am studying hard for it but videogames are such a hindrance to me it's unreal. I believe there is much more in real accomplishment than a temporary sense of accomplishment. It's time to level up myself instead of my imaginary character.

But progressively, as I've matured, I've developed a lot more self confidence and I think now is the time to change my life. I don't want to be a depraved little shit forever. I realised that I only have one life and I was spending it playing videogames. If I'm not living my life to the full then it's completely wasted. I am 4 days into my 90 day detox! I hope I can find a way to play games in moderation because some of them are really inspiring and are works of art.

My goals for the near future are:

- Stop hating myself

- Get out of the house more

- Practice my drumming

- Practice my singing

- Improve my art

- Talk to girls more

- Write a book

- Get into climbing again

- Read up on politics more

- Maybe start running

Edited November 10, 2016 by Schwing

[Cam Adair]

Welcome to the forum.

[Regular Robert]

Ello Matty, you cunt. I believe, British people use the word like it was nothing. A little different to the Americans.

I welcome you to the forum. Glad you decided to take control over your life and live it to the fullest. However, I don't want to be a smart arse, but regarding your goals: It makes sense to set realistic goals for the near future aaand to clarify those goals. As said, not trying to be a smart arse here, but if you want to measure your success, you should have measurable goals. Let's take the drumming for example. It makes sense to phrase that goal in a fashion that you can measure it. "I want to practice drumming at least once a weak". You don't have to. But I believe that this will help you. Because every time you fulfill this goal, you will have a tiny success on your road to your big success. Also, don't overload yourself with goals. The detox itself can be quite hard and the more goals you "ought'a fulfill", the higher the chance you will fail. Failure can result in the opposite of goal 1: Increasing self-hate and then in possible relapses. I believe, in the beginning, it makes sense to focus on local things.

Aside from that: Enjoy your time in the forum, rock hard and I wish you the best of luck, the best of strength for your dreams and goals!

Edited November 10, 2016 by Robert Arctor

[WorkInProgress]

Welcome.

- Stop hating myself

Best thing to do this is to stay consistent with teh detox. To be able to stick to something for over 3months was a really big inw for me and my self confidence.

Another thing I which helps to get more focuse on teh good things in your life would be a gratitued Journal. Just lsit 5 things you are grateful for every day. THey doesn't ahve to be big ones. it can be jsut the coffee in the morning sometimes or something nice someone said to you at your day. The whole idea behind this is that you consistently think about good things in your life.

You ahe a lot of good ideas what to fill your freed time wiht. In my experience the ebst thign to do is to pick one area and Focus on it. Just look in your list and think about what has teh most imortance to you. then make some SMART Goals. Take this Video from cam  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=03Jenk21qsk

[Streuselsturm]

Ello Matty, you cunt. I believe, British people use the word like it was nothing. A little different to the Americans.

I welcome you to the forum. Glad you decided to take control over your life and live it to the fullest. However, I don't want to be a smart arse, but regarding your goals: It makes sense to set realistic goals for the near future aaand to clarify those goals. As said, not trying to be a smart arse here, but if you want to measure your success, you should have measurable goals. Let's take the drumming for example. It makes sense to phrase that goal in a fashion that you can measure it. "I want to practice drumming at least once a weak". You don't have to. But I believe that this will help you. Because every time you fulfill this goal, you will have a tiny success on your road to your big success. Also, don't overload yourself with goals. The detox itself can be quite hard and the more goals you "ought'a fulfill", the higher the chance you will fail. Failure can result in the opposite of goal 1: Increasing self-hate and then in possible relapses. I believe, in the beginning, it makes sense to focus on local things.

Aside from that: Enjoy your time in the forum, rock hard and I wish you the best of luck, the best of strength for your dreams and goals!

 

 

Words of wisdom!

I fell for the same trap during my detox and instead of feeling like I achieved something I started to get really frustrated since I was focusing too much on the negative side.

What helped me was tackling each goal in baby steps setting me up for easy succes and just enjoy every evening with the feeling of "one more day where I was strong"

Oh yes and welcome to the community

[Schwing]

 

Ello Matty, you cunt. I believe, British people use the word like it was nothing. A little different to the Americans.

I'll try refrain from calling people cunts if I ever move to the states then, but I probably wont be able to help it knowing me. Thanks for the heads up, you cunt!

Thank you so much for this advice guys. Really this is really great constructive feedback! I will be starting my journal very soon. I will reevaluate my goals too.

[Nancy S.]

Same with the comments above, I would say "bitch" is the equivalent for "cunt" here in North America - one is taken very seriously, the other not as much. I really like your list - it's reasonable and practical, I chuckled a lil at the "talk to girls more". Best of luck Matthew! Good for you for quitting games and trying to take a positive spin on your life.

[happykhan]

Sup Clint! Hope you can channel that determination into real change mangh.

Really do.