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Onlysoul

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Everything posted by Onlysoul

  1. Rescue time app si perfect! We can see clearly now where we spend the most of our time. Yeah imporant is step by step. You say i will read 1 page than other page etc. If you said i am going to read 60 pages of book you will fail. Be strong!
  2. Onlysoul

    Day 6!

    Good work! Keep going. You already changed you paradigm. Bad= spend time with gaming, porn etc Good= every day i will make some activities which leads me to better life. Ich wünsche dir viel Kraft !
  3. Not every day can be productive! Be strong and allow yourself to rest.
  4. 7 Day Very hot day today isnt it ? According to where . I read cca 60 pages of book Getting Things Done and its perfect. Main idea is get out of head your activity and put it on paper. Have a system where you can track your progress and what you want (results) and what do you must to do which activity lead to required results. I installed Rescue Time extensions to chrome and now i can see where i spend most of my time online. I meditated and went cycling. But i ignored my english progress and i must repair my CV and send it to one vietnamese IT company. I love myself and i am enough ! I have little bit big belly but its ok. Not everyone can be thin. If you read this and you are overweighted its ok. People will still love you and these thing doesnt matter yet.
  5. I am very happy for you! You doing great! Be aware of alcohol because this evil thing can make things worse because you have less control over yourself. I feel finally like human being too and its perfect feeling! But be aware when you have bad days or bad mood. In this moment cravings are high AF. And one thing. If you experiencing that you are in control be aware because it is may be a trap! If you start thinking about porn etc run away for god sake from home and walk (Not alway but you know what i mean).When i read your story i pretty well find myself in there. I wish you much strong as you can possess.
  6. Man you are doing great! You gonna make it! This path will teach you more about life and yourself. I will follow you journey .
  7. Thanks guys i appreciate that ! Pharmacist Thanks for information ! But i have finally some works to do . Tom yeah you are right. Step by step day by day. Bad days are quiet bad and cravings are strong but we decided change ourselfs and we are already on the way. 6 Day I woke up in the morning with bad mood and strong tension. I came in work and haven't taste to do something. I was bored and sick from everything. After work i was with my sister in town and bought new pair of shoes and shorts. Then i have idea to go in bookshop and i found one book. David Allen - Getting Things Done. So i am going to read this book at weekend. I am so excited. Afternoon was pretty fine. I visited my relatives and then meditate. It such a great thing, feeling better and concentration is perfect.
  8. Welcome! Just learn from the past, be present and prepare yourself with your new habits on future. Be strong ! Feel free to pm or ICQ.
  9. 5 Day Today it was very bad. I started watching some porn and other stupid things. I think that i am very lazy and comfortable person. Every day i must have schedule or goals or whatever but worst is do nothing. If you do nothing you feel bad and than you make stupid decisions which later lead to regret and pain. Gosh I know what to do but despite of that im making nothing. Am i that stupid ? Ohh man...
  10. 4 Day Today i was lazy AF. I exactly do nothing. I eat too much and sit in front of PC. Positive is that i was out with my dog, go for a walk with him and then go cycling with my sister. Later I looked into the mirror and i said: You are responsible! You are in control and only you have the power change things in your life. No one will do it for you. Your life depend on how you spend your times, exactly what are you doing in your free time. I love you! You must sacrifice this stupid things which you used for escape. No strong fear or panic attack today so its quiet positive thing too. I meditate every single day despite of my laziness. Its ok Onlysoul. Tomorrow will be different day with different problems, solutions and mood. Be good on yourself.
  11. Welcome ! Yeah loneliness its our common problem. Man make everything whats makes you happy and love yourself as much as you can. Love is our common saviour.
  12. Thanks guys for support! Yeah nice font you use mr. pharmacist . Priest panic attack: Exactly when i have this panic attacks i experiencing feelings like powerless and strong tension that this is my fate, i cant change anything and so on. I also experiencing visual image of cross, jesus and altar. Man that is very frightening. I would never say that shitty words or scare my child or young relatives. Never ! Because you can hurt them very much even with that simple moves. Please man tell me how i can manage or handle my panic attack? Affirmation: I changed my self talk. I always telling myself that i am good enough etc. Even if i have bad days or things go bad for me i'm always nice to me. Yes you have right dude, i must boost my selfconfidence because no one can do this for me.
  13. Yeah You are right! Best way how to deal with bad emotions or fear or whatever is just watching the thoughts without fighting or paying attention. 3 Day Today i felt really good. Some bad emotions and thoughts were there but nothing big. Littble bit cravings too but i handle it with learning English. I remind myself that i must do everything to be better person. I was at work, then came home and went cut the grass. Then i talked with my parents and after awhile end my meditation. I am going to watch document The Putin Interviews. Ehm i love you onlysoul and with love come responsibility. I fix you I promise
  14. Onlysoul

    Day 6!

    Way of thinking: Paradigms are a multitude of habits that guide every move you make. They affect the way you eat, the way you walk, even the way you talk. They govern your communication, your work habits, your successes and your failures.
  15. You have your own head and its up to you be better. You love yourself because you already started this life changing path. Be strong, very strong and prove everybody around you that you can make things that are good for you.
  16. I'll keep my fingers crossed for you. We started building ourselves and changing our minds. We must do everything that is good for us. We are good enough!
  17. Thank you a lot for this slight edge pic dude! I spend meditating 140 minutes and this help me a lot to be aware and seeing how my emotions work. I wish you much strong as you can possess.
  18. Welcome ! Gaming its only symptom. Your problem is somewhere else. You must find it and solve your problems. Than you will be free.
  19. Onlysoul

    Day 6!

    Hello, My suggest to you is trying meditation. Meditate only 10 min per day and you see soon results ! You become more aware of your feeling and emotions. Second advice: Past is past, you define yourself and your future. You are good enough ! You have wrong paradigm in your life. Try read books adout manliness. Last advice: Make strong commitment that you do everything to be better person. Dont be like these guys who make exceptions, play games and then cry on this forum!
  20. 2 Day Yesterday i had panic attack. Today i feel better a lot. After my job interview i had some beers and a moment ago i came home. I opened cane beer and currently writing this post. This fear thing scares me a lot. I told myself that fear is no longer my enemy. But i am experiencing every day scaring feeling and seeing bad things. But i telling myself its only illusion. I must see my fear but no fight with it. It is interesting journey to find my true self, build my true self. You discover how things works and its exciting. I am going to meditate and than watch film Leon. I reminding myself that iam worth it, good enough, i love myself. As my professor said: All you need is love and these materials .
  21. Welcome ! If you want talk we are here for you. Feel free send pm.
  22. Hi, I wish you much power as you can possess. For me blocking sites or internet wasnt a solution. You must discover why do you do these things. When you know why, you can understand your situation and change you paradigm.
  23. 1 Day I am not playing videogames anymore. I am clean approximately one month. But i discover that i am still having problem with myself. From young age i dont fit into collective, because they always rejected me. They behaved to me like piece of garbage. In home everyone expected from me good results in school but they dont investigate how i feel or what i want. Nobody ever tell me: We love you. You are good enough. This circumstances created in me feeling, that i am not good enough, you must hide your true face. This feeling ongoing dissatisfaction was incredible. I could not be myself and thats why i ran away from myself. I ran to pc games, porn, food and drugs. I ran until now. Today i am saying stop, I am going to face my problems. I am good enough, i love myself. I do everything to be good on myself, independent at work and also independet financially. This is my commitment. I would face my fears. Every single day i must do my best to be better. Also productive and relaxed. Meditation have opened door to present moment. And also one interesting thing. When i was younger my grandma was very religious. She always tell me you will become priest. Its you desitny, what else you would do? You can imagine how this thing can mock and confuse young person. When i feel bad or have this "bad days" this priest thing shows up and still scary me. My mind is projecting this scenario and i am experiencing panic attacks. Maybe its sounds like funny thing but for me is very very frightening. I am not sure that its good thing to write this but i dont know where i should. You can see how can family and family members hurt person. And one thing for everyone. Never give up. Never ! You must keep going and make thing what you ever want.
  24. This was written 4 month ago on reddit. From that day i learned something about me and my live. I quoted this because you will better understand me and my problems in life. I was unemployed before but today i am on my graduate practice in brazil corporation and soon i will know if they hire me. I feel better know and i want to share what i have done up to now. - I read books about men, what does it mean do be a man and i found simple truth. Accept your self and your good and bad sides. You are good enough and people will love you even if you are bald, fat, not successful or whatever. Love your self, tell yourself that you are good enough, simply said i love you! It works because with love come responsibility. If i love myself i will do everything to feel better, be better. Its not about beeing successful but be complete. Do what you always wanted, draw, run, listen music, go for a walk, be silent and talk to your self, learn how to make pizza, music, web etc. I am proud to be a man ! - I registered on site headspace.com. Headspace is website i used for meditation. Its enough to meditate just 10 minutes per day. After 10 minutes i feel better, more persent, thankful and i train my brain to be more focused and its good to getting rid of all the dirt. - I started learning english in webiste called Duolingo. I spend there alemost 1 hour every day. I dont know how to speak english very well or you see that my grammar is catastrophe but one day i will use english flawless - Exercise. Every day i make squats, push ups and lifting legs. I go hiking and cycling often. - Start with baby steps. When you want read book set your goal on minimum. For example one paragraph then pause. Repeat. Its very powerful tool so its important to start with small steps. - If you fail, relapse and play games again or whatever you simply dont be angry on yourself ! Dont feel bad about this. Just say ok a made mistake a must go, I have to do what's right and good for me. I am good person, i love my self, iam good enough ! Its that simple ! If you feel bad or some sort of pain of your fall its not good because that mix make strong connection and this behaviour will be repeated. Choose love not fear. I came on this forum because i have one thing in my life that is not satisfied. I have not any friends. Yeah its true, classmates and my friends are gone. I feel lonely sometimes, so i am here feel free pm me
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