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Getting Back Up


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I return to this forum 6 months after my first attempt at a detox in May 2016. 

During the 20 days or so I managed on my first detox, I filled what felt like an abundance of time with several new activities. I was making considerable improvements in speaking Portuguese, playing music and playing pool, whilst continuing my intensive fitness schedule. I was feeling fantastic throughout the week, but the weekends presented a massive void of time that proved too difficult to fill. I found myself sitting around bored for hours most weekends, never fully committing to the lifestyle change required to go 90 days without gaming.

I have attempted a detox a couple more times since then, but I have never surpassed the 20-ish days I set in May. I have been playing for the last couple of months in the belief that I can moderate myself, though as foretold by others in this forum my acceptable amounts of gaming has very slowly snowballed into something much worse.

I will stop my gaming immediately. I have not yet assembled a plan, but I will not let that stop me from getting started. On my commute home, I will consider how I can use hindsight from my previous attempts to achieve something much better this time around. I need to carefully consider why zero gaming whatsoever is better than small amounts of it, and hold myself accountable to goals that I can check regularly. My goals will be focused around:

  • Fitness
  • Money
  • Progress in my new hobbies
  • Helping other people be happy :)

I haven't yet figured out what I'll do when my body needs to relax but my brain is racing - this is where gaming normally comes in. I'll note down some plans here soon.

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Its great to have you back Jeremias!

Sounds like we've gone through similar processes of relapse, as I also thought I could play in moderation. It never worked for longer than a couple of days. If you're looking for hindsight, you might get some ideas from my own relapse posts early in my journal about what you can do to prevent it occurring again.

Greetings from across The Ditch! :D

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Thank you everyone! It's great to see new and familiar faces as the forum grows. 

Sounds like we've gone through similar processes of relapse, as I also thought I could play in moderation. It never worked for longer than a couple of days. If you're looking for hindsight, you might get some ideas from my own relapse posts early in my journal about what you can do to prevent it occurring again.

Hey Alex, I've read through the sections of your journal around your first two relapses and the reasons behind both sound very similar to mine! I will follow in your footsteps and keep at it. I recently saw the documentary you were a part of - it was insightful so good on you for doing it. 

Can you specify your goals a little bit more?

Hey Mad Pharmacist :D

Thanks for asking - I've had a good think about my goals, but I need to make them more specific as time goes by. They are as follows:

  • Journal
    • I want to stay active on this forum to keep track of my progress, but not too active so I'm not thinking about it constantly. I think around twice per week is a good approximate.
  • Fitness
    • I want to look and feel good. This is easily measurable by body fat and skeletal muscle mass measurements at my gym, but better measurements could be made by body dimensions (waist size etc.)
    • I want to start running again, following from my hamstring injury months ago. I will need to run for short distances regularly. This is something I used to be excited about, but the gym took over. It will be interesting doing both in tandem.
  • Wealth
    • I want to save money for a house. This is a momentous goal that I will need to actively implement short-term goals to achieve, including good academic results at university and self-improvement in the right areas. This goal is also multi-faceted meaning that measuring my progress may be difficult, but I have some ideas.
  • Hobbies
    • I want to complete my Associate of Music next year. This is pretty easy to measure - you either pass or you fail!
    • There are various other possibilities I have in mind, but I am not yet ready to commit to too much. I'll leave myself space to grow as time goes by
  • Happiness
    • I want to be a good friend and an increasingly independent son. I would rather not measure this goal too closely :)

I will elaborate on these goals as I make some progress.

I have had a very productive week. I'm starting to get more sleep again, which is nice. I have been to the gym each day except for Tuesday, when I was going out to dinner with some friends from uni. This weekend I'll be spending some time at the beach, and I'll book some flights for a big holiday away! Stay posted on that one...

Thanks for reading.

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Day 10

Sorry I haven't posted since last Thursday. I have been busy on weekdays and lazy on the weekend to make a proper post. That's what I tell myself anyway. The truth is that I've been putting off writing a journal with the idea that I can make it longer, well formatted and accounting for the goals I set out. 

I'm sitting on the bus on the way to work right now, thinking it'll be better to get something down. :)

Regarding the detox, the initial high has worn off and I'm starting to knuckle down on the challenge. I'm happier on the weekdays than on the weekends because I'm more busy - I spent hours last Sunday on youtube and reddit out of boredom. It's a slippery slope and I need to take more initiative in getting out on the weekends. 

That said, my time spent at work and the gym has been well spent. I've spoken to some friends I haven't seen recently, with ideas in my head but no real plans yet. I've requested the syllabus for next year's exam and practiced a bit on the weekend. Not a bad week but it could definitely be better.

I've figured that I can use google sheets on my phone to track my gym progress. I'll whip together a template in my off time and show you soon.

Edited by Jeremias
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Day 16

I'm on my phone again, but this time I'm on holiday in Noosa, Australia. It's a pretty nice part of the world.

I've had a pretty good end to the week. I made a presentation to my colleagues on Friday morning which went better than expected - I haven't always been the best public speaker so it's great to feel some progress there.

On Saturday morning, I headed on a family holiday to the beach and I'll be here until next Sunday. Life's good and I'm not really thinking about anything else at the moment.

Progress on my goals:

- Fitness: I'm feeling great, but I'm also eating a lot on holidays. It seems to be disappearing but a week without the gym may make things worse. I have started tracking my bodyfat, weight and muscle on excel after each gym session.

- Wealth: I made a good presentation the other day, but it is important to leave a lasting impression during my last week at the company next week. I'll have a think about this in advance.

- Hobbies: On hiatus at the moment, but I have been locking in some dates for next year.

- Happiness: I'm really enjoying time with my cousins. Perhaps I should checkin with my friends at home when I get back.

Thanks everyone and keep up the good work

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  • 5 weeks later...

It's holiday season, and I have been back at it again. I'm honestly embarassed to post but I guess that's the way it is. I haven't really lost much, but I haven't really gained much either. I guess I'll never really know what I've lost until I see what other people can do with the time I've blown.

It started with a mobile game before escalating into downloading some of the other games I used to play. Now I've actually become bored of them (unusual) and I'm back here again. 

Ah well. Life goes on.

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