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Maddog Eric's Journal


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Right, so I'll spruce this up one day to be a bit more detailed and more coherent, I just want to get this written down for now since time is of the essence (you'll see what that's about shortly).

Hi everyone,

So my name is Eric.  I've been on a quest to better myself for at least a good five years, with some SERIOUS momentum going for the last three.

I got my second chance at succeeding in life three years ago however, things weren't going so hot.  

I was depressed, and I was slacking off at work at the clinic I was a medical office assistant at because I didn't want to let thoughts of where I was at in life come into my head.  So I spent all day browsing reddit and teamliquid (a Starcraft forum), while on the job.  I didn't quite get fired, but my managers weren't sad to see me go when my temp position had ran its course.

However, one of my coworkers saw some potential in me, and she talked my managers into hiring me back.  

That was the turning point in my life.  Someone BELIEVED in me, and I couldn't let her down.  So I was able to flip the switch, and I didn't get sucked into reading about video games and useless shit after that.  I quickly became a rising star at the clinic, and that momentum transferred into the rest of my life. The depression subsided, I became more confident, and found a path in life that I wanted to take.  I want to help with mental health.  

So in September 2015 I went back to school at University of Calgary for psychology.  I did that while working at the clinic, and my work kept me going strong through that.  

Near the end of the year, one of the docs at the clinic heard me talking about a project I was working on at school and he said I should submit a research proposal to be his summer student this summer, where we'd be doing research for U of C on the medical data of patients at our clinic.  That was an incredible opportunity, so I did that and got the job!

Shortly after that, I went to a party and finally had the confidence to strike up a great conversation with a girl at this party who also is a U of C psych student.  I've been dating her now for two months.  This is the best my life has ever been, but it's all just so close to going up in flames.

Unfortunately, my old demons have come back to haunt me once more.  I'm working off of a laptop and on my own hours now, and that means that reddit is always just a couple clicks away, and I can always justify it with "oh I'll just put in the time later." 

On monday I told my professor I had completed data extraction of 50 charts, when I've only done 32, and we're meeting tomorrow at 2:00 PM to review what I've done... I've got 25 hours to absolutely HAUL ASS to have something reasonable to present for tomorrow. If I get up to 75 charts by tomorrow (not sure if that's possible... but it's worth a shot), that'll be reasonable I think. But that means I need to do as much work as I've done in the last two months, over the next 25 hours.

Not all is lost however. A few weeks ago I worked for 40 of 48 hours over one weekend to get caught up with work. I did that working on a side project for this research job.  Fortunately that deadline and assignment came up out of nowhere, so it was just on me to do as much as I could within that weekend, and I wanted to impress my boss.  So every couple of hours I'd report my progress on facebook, and the encouragement from my friends kept me going through that.  I don't have that luxury this time, since most people think my job is going just fine, when it's not right now.  So instead, I'm gonna get my updates going HERE. 

After this week (I'm hoping to get up to 100 charts done by the end of this weekend), I'll get my journal going into something that looks a bit more like a real journal.  I also hope to eventually see if I can put some of my health and psych experience to work. But that is a story for another time.

For now, I'm just stoked to be here.

Good luck and have fun with all of your efforts to keep your gaming addiction demons at bay.  


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Two hours of chart review done.  Only 4 charts completed so far, which, is technically on pace, for 75 done by tomorrow since I've got 25 hours for a bit less than 50 charts, but it's still twice as slow as I'd like to be. I think I'll sleep when I'm up to 65 charts.  So thats... Ugh, probably 10 hours from now if things keep going like this. 

Edited by Maddog
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Haha, hey Cam :) 

Yep, it's good to be back and journalling again.  Though yeah, my journal is going to look pretty barren for the next couple of weeks.

Anyways, I'm officially at 50 of the 75 charts that I want to have done before tomorrow at 2:00.  An hour ahead of schedule technically! Gonna get a solid 2.5 hours of sleep before I get back at it.  

Man, procrastination sucks pretty hard but at the same time... It produces a pretty unique sort of rush in a way when you're just givin'er and burning the candle at both ends of the stick. 

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enjoyed reading your story Maddog!!   sounds like you're kicking some serous chart-butt  too kicking-butt-14395194.jpg

Take the rush. Use the adrenaline and take some time to recover afterwards. I'm rooting for you man.

Thanks guys! 

Yeah it's been a long day but looks like I'm JUST barely gonna get this all done in time :). (2 more to go, and 40 minutes left, which isn't too bad). 

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Hey Maddog, if you're a LEGEND JOURNALIST, then I can't wait for your next entries!

I know that panic rush a moments before deadline and personally I hate it. It leads me to stress more and to neglect my other activities I wanted to do like exercising, writing etc.

It's better to work systematically which is even scientifically proven!

Greetings, Mad Pharmacist

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